thoughts

at times do any of youget scared of ur disease? I get thinking to much and i regret things i done in the past.. maybe this soounds dumb but i get hung upon it at times, but then to move one and get okay..plus i feel like iamsingling self out at times, usually i read the Bible when i get really down inside..I guess its normal.. I heard something about u can reverse mild fibrosis the other day..Iam stage 2 and grade 2 and 1a which most of u know..guess i get anxiety once in awhile.. any suggestions..may GOD BLESS EVERYONE..

[Xenigma]

Fibrosis usually does reverse with tx.
(In most people)  BX say's I'm S1-G1
I feel I'm 2/2.  Just my gut instinct.
They took out a piece of my lung with my liver
(BTW-Lung was OK-I got a two-fer) but how much of a good sample
they got --I dunno.  It was a good size piece though,
everyone commented on it!  LMAO

Don't ever get down on yourself, living in the past does
not do anyone any good.  Always concentrate on the future,
even one day at a time.

I am not a religious person but I always try and think positive.
I use visualization to try and get rid of the virus, and positive thought/energy.

When you get the anxiety, take your xanax.  That's what it's for.
Relax, read the bible, pray, and tell yourself
"I am getting healthy, I am killing the virus"  Believe it!!
You ARE killing the virus.  Never doubt it.

enigma

[orphanedhawk]

I think the feeling you are having are normal while doing tx.
I had anxiety and became very emotional. I didn't want to socialize and went inward.
Like you, I would try and focus on the things that sooth my soul.
   good luck,        OH

[sfwandwow]

U are right,its just at times it hits me more then other times..I strongly beleive these critters will leave.. The worst times is when my hubby is on nights , he has that swing shift ****. he has been doing it for 24 years..  but i only have been around 4 yrs married to him.. I will be happy when he retires..I do take my xanax when i get that way.. and boy it really helps me..I try to get a change of mine and do something that soothes my soul..I guess i just think about die-ing...I wanna grow to get old..guess thats my anxiety Its great when someone talks to ya about it and i appreciate yall talking to me..Orphanedhawk i get kinda like un-social at times, and rather stay home,but i make myself go to work, its hard.. and few work associates will say ur not ur bubbling self today, it kinda comes and goes.. but my xanax helps alot...Enigma i keep trying to tell myself inside it isnt getting  any worse its helping no matter what by giving my liver a rest...TRUST me I Pray alot.. Tommorow willbe a better day, Gonna get up and go to breakfast w/hubby when he gets off and then shopping.. he will be back to days after the new Year.. Hooray..I have kids from ex-marriage but they are teens and either off w/friends or in there room..U know how teens are..they are good kids but just busy.. i look back and say hey i use to be like that..But really thank you both for a great input.. Yall are great.. Have a great evening.. Thanks a bunch for listening..              

[Robin_Fla]

Yes, I think lots of us have those thoughts. I get pretty worried and have regrets about my past foolish behavior that resulted in this mess. But then, I remind myself that I was young and didn't really know the risks at the time. I wish I had had more inner strength in those days but, hey, I have gained it now by golly! LOL.

It was soooo much easier when I could live life in blissful ignorance (probably have had HCV for 20+ yrs w/o knowing) but now I have a chance to change lifestyle (quit partying) and do the tx to do what I can. Even if tx doesn't work for everyone, the evidence does show that the damage is lessened even if tx is not ultimately sustained. So that also makes it worth the effort, I think.

Like enigma, I try to keep up with positive visualizations (die, virus, die - now is that positive or negative?! LOL) and I see myself as being completely cured. Try to turn your inward negative thoughts to those that will help you. I'm glad the Bible helps you in that way. Positive visualization and reinforcement does that for me. Even if I just grab a few minutes here and there, or a phrase that I repeat to myself as I am driving or showering (like "I am cured" or "I am virus free"), that works.

I have a related issue that I will post separately in a minute (personality change) so please help me too and reply to that.

Keep your chin up!

Robin

[sfwandwow]

i proberly have had it 20 yrs also,when i did stupid ****.. thought i was having fun when really i was making myself ill..Good positive thoughts u have i like that.Yall are so great makes me feel better tonight already.., that is for all yall!!!!Thank Goodness for this forumn.  

[Robin_Fla]

PS - I also wanted to say that if you just have occasional thoughts along this line, then don't worry, just try to avert them to something more positive.

If, however, you find yourself really dwelling on them too much, or if they get really negative, talk with your doc about it. My sister has had this problem for many years (of thinking totally random horrible thoughts) and has just recently gotten the right diagnosis and medication to help her (she has some OCD and depression). She really suffered needlessly for a long time so I am glad she got some help.

[sfwandwow]

OCD is oppositional compulsive disorder,correct? Iam not depressed, i just think about it when i get alone more and take more time to think..Tommorow iam going out to buy a treadmill and that will really help me alot cause i love to exercise and also it releives stress levels from work and these critters..You are really a nice caring person, iappreciate all the input..May u have a wonderful NEW YEAR..      

[sfwandwow]

SNOW coming this Weekend hopefully.. just heard on news..

[Xenigma]

Yeah!!!!
Now you can build a snowman and shovel the driveway
and front steps.  Then if you still have some energy left
start shoveling your neighbors!  :-))

Seems you need to keep busy or your mind just races
and you get some negative thoughts during these times.

Maybe take up arts and crafts, things you can make at home,
or perhaps paint a room and rearrange the furniture.
(A little Feng Shui is good for the soul)

Reading, knitting, cleaning out drawers, organizing.
This all helps with that anxiety as well,
and you will have that wonderful feeling of a clean-organized home.
(I almost forget what that's like)

Go to the mall and window shop or just sit and watch
the people (This is one of my favorite things to do-people watching)
people are so funny!!  

I have a 24 and a 20 year old.  They are in their own worlds so having them
hang and be with Mom isn't gonna happen.  My son is off on tour again in a week.
My thoughts are constantly with him now, and I get waves of adrenalin.
He's my "spotter" on shot nights. (Especially Procrit)  He's so good at
getting every drop of EPO out of the bottle for me to inject.

If we had nothing to worry about, what would we do??
My hubby always says "Quit lookin' for $H!T to worry about"!
Maybe one day I will learn how to do that....

enigma

[Anonymous225]

HCV Geno 2a, 14th shot today...UND at week 12.

I tend to get alot of anxiety and depression depending on the day.  I use xanax , as needed, for the anxiety and lexipro for the depression...daily.  If it were not for those two drugs I am afraid I would've ended it weeks ago.

I keep a journal that I am turning into a "Hepatitis for Dummies" so to speak...if not for anyone else, for myself.  It keeps me sane.

[Anonymous225]

I think I get more frightened of what long term effects the treatments are going to have on me than I do of the illness.  Something has to be amiss when you put poison into your body for 24, 48 or 72 weeks.

[sfbaygirl]

I hate to say it but you are correct to worry about this. Great you were UND at week 12.  My tx ended a bit early and I am suffering with post tx sx.  While rare, they do happen.  Hope for the best for you all on tx.

[dointime]

You'd have to be crazy not to be scared of the possible effects of HCV and also of the meds.  Both of these are seriously scary.  

All you can do is not add to the fear by being scared of being scared.  When I feel like that I let myself go there.  I say to myself "OK so I'm scared" and then I find something else to think about.
  
dointime  
  

[sfbaygirl]

you are so right!!  What is that quote about fear...I forget! Sorry.  But what Dointime says is correct. We cannot add to the fear we already have.  Scared is what happens during tx. Sort of natural, I think. When I get scared I do try to do something that may help myself...maybe stationary bike, food, call a friend etc.  Tx is tough, but it will not be the end of your world.

[sfwandwow]

thanks guys i really appreciate all the in-put..May GOD watch over yall..

[Anonymous225]

As much as I say fear, let's change that to say that it "concerns" me.  Just as this illness at one time actually had me fearing it, I now say I respect it along with all of its power.  Like a hidden enemy.