This forum is an un-mediated, patient-to-patient forum for questions and support regarding herpes issues such as: Herpes symptoms and treatments, causes, diagnosis, and herpes in men, tests, telling your spouse or partner.
Lately, this past month I have been overcome with paranoia and anxiety about my sexual health.
I have hpv..possibly more than one strain for over 5 years (diagnosed around 17, am now 22) and it's upsetting that my body hasn't been able to control it completely yet.
I've been tested for hsv2, twice in the past yr. Results are negative.
Now, hsv1 scares me because I read it's very contagious and can be caught simply by sharing drinks...cigarettes, etc.
My boyfriend of almost 2 years says he doesn't remember ever having a cold sore and I've never seen any irritations of any sort around his mouth. ..same with his 2 other brothers. (family shares everything...so I guess it helps in easing my mind if they've never had anything visible) although I know that doesn't mean he doesn't have it. He has never been tested, only for hiv/aids. ;[
I guess I'm just nervous, I'm going to get hsv1 genitally.
He rarely does oral on me...maybe 3x tops in these 2 yrs together. Never any signs of anything.
We kiss on a regular basis..so, if he had it, wouldn't I get it orally for sure before genitally?
He does sometimes lick his finger for lube..another concern.
I try not to, but he still will share cigarettes with friends and his brother, and probably drinks too.
He knows about my anxiety and stress over sexual health and this kind of stuff but will still share cigs once in a while...as he does not necessarily "believe" hsv-1 can be transmitted "so easily"...
Is it THAT easy to contract?
Wouldn't I get it orally first before genitally since we kiss every day and share drinks with eachother?
What about the finger spit lube scenerio?
Is it healthy for me to be worrying almost every day that one day I'm going to look down there and find something new? It's become very mind consuming and I dont know what to do about it. I've been stressing EVERY SINGLE DAY. Over washing myself and everything. I don't know how other people don't worry about std's ...I seem to worry TOO MUCH & I dont know how to stop and it's ruining my relationships and emotional health lately.
Anyone, please help ... you really have no idea how appreciative I am of responses.
http://www.ashastd.org/herpes/herpes_learn_oralherpes.cfm is a terrific site for info on oral herpes. as an adult you are most likely to contract oral herpes from romantic type kisses, not from sharing drinks or cigarettes.
why not have your bf get tested for herpes to know his own status so you know if you have to worry or not? have you been tested for hsv1 too or just hsv2?
obviously your anxiety about this is crossing the line at this point and is interfering with your day to day life and happiness. have you thought about talking to a professional about this at all?
I think I've read your posts a couple times about how usually as adults, we contract it mainly from romantic kissing. I've gone to so many websites about herpes, including the one you recommended and they all say you can get it from sharing drinks and eating utensils, so it makes me paranoid and confused!
I want to have him tested when I get my insurance back in a few months but might ask him to be tested before then just to ease my mind...hopefully, ease my mind. I think I wouldn't handle a positive result for hsv-1 too terribly because it is so common. It's just with my type of worry, I'd probably worry for the rest of my life about getting it down south.
I was last tested for hsv1 last october along with hsv2 by blood test. & also hsv2 just last month, blood also. All tests were negative. I mean, I've never had anything like the symptoms of that down there. Just my hpv warts make me nervous about the possibility of something else happening to my "oh so fragile sensitive sexual organs" as i think of it now.
i dont know if it's all as fragile as i'm thinking. i'd like to think it's just like the other parts of my body; strong and able to take care of itself!
& I was thinking I might need to try some anti-anxiety meds and probably talk to a sexual therapist of some sort as soon as i get my insurance cov back.
infants and toddlers can get it from sharing drinks and food, not adults.
I'm a fan of talk therapy myself. Medication helps with the chemical side of things but you still need good old fashioned talk therapy to improve your coping skills. You can't fix all of the problem when you are only treating 1/2 of it. You need to learn to recognize when you are in an anxiety provoking situation and learn how to deal with it before it gets out of control. It's also helpful to learn how to avoid anxiety producing situations when you can too. Unfortunately these are skills many of us just didn't get growing up in this world where everything is aimed at scaring the bejebers out of us and telling us we need to worry more :(
i totally have the same anxiety you do, im currently talking to a councelor about my std anxiety.. even though ive tested negative for everything, im still scared.. i havent gotten the hsv blood test done bc my doc doesnt think its necessary but i many just have it done for some peace of mind.. it sad to say but im glad someone out there shares my fear of stds becuae a lot of my friends are not that worried about these kinds of things and sorta feel alone ..
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