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Autoinoculation
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Autoinoculation

OK.  Long story.  I have HSV 2 genitally.  Few outbreaks, only treated them per episode.  There was a point in time during an active outbreak that I thought i may have spread it to my lips.  A few months later a bump popped up on my lip, a little cut/almost a blister appeared.  It came and went quickly and was never a full blown blister.  My tongue became white, and it appeared i had some sores on my tongue but this was after the thing on my lip went away.  My face was itchy for a solid week or 2 following.  When the "sore" first erupted, I don't know if i was in denial, or I just didn't really realize what it was.  But i have this terrible habit of plucking my eyebrows in a magnified mirror.  i was plucking with the heel of my palm directly on the "sore", then I moved my hand to get another angle on my poor brows, and the heel of my palm was directly on my left upper cheekbone, close to my eye.  A day or 2 after my sore looked all healed, i went to realx and get a facial.  Which i would never have done had i known this lady was going to wipe my lip, then wipe my eyes.  Both, and immediately.

I went on anti-virals, and anti-depressants.  But I was having strange sensations on the side of my face where the heel of my palm had been, and my head felt very strange at times.  I don't know how else to explain.  Waves almost.  I read up on the antidepressant i was on, and found that lots of people said that facial numbness was a side effect.  So I stopped taking it to see, but still had the symptoms.  At this point i had also stopped taking the anti-virals to see what would happen.  I should mention, I got blood tested again, and still only had HSV2, no new infection.

I never had anything pop up on my face.  But my eyes became very red and irritated.  I went back on the anti-virals.  I went to my eye doc, expressed my fear, he looked and said no sign of ocular herpes but agreed they were very irritated.  Went again a while later, same thing.  I told him I was on anti-virals, and asked if it was possible that they were just keeping an outbreak at bay.  Other than the irritation, i am having throbbing pain on the left side of my face, sometimes it is dull, sometimes a little itchy.  Very disturbing.  Also felt as thought there were something pushing on the inside of my left eye.  I noticed a slight sensativety to light.  Also a little bit of tearing in my L eye.  Went to an opthamologist.  He said, no sign of viral infection, but said my eyes were irritated and gave me some drops, bepreve I believe..  They seem to be doing nothing.  Went back to my GP, who tells me it is not what I think, i have not spread it to my face, or my eyes.  My question is, why not?  If I was able to spread it to my lips, why not again?  These symptoms are real, and i feel as everyone thinks i am crazy.  No answers, just it is not what i think.  My doc isn't even convinced i spread it to my lip.  I am.

I need help.  Of some sort.  i'm not sure what exactly.  I can't handle that i have done this to myself.  And that nobody believes me.  I know I should take solace in the fact that 4 doctors have now told me I don't have ocular herpes.  But I am still convinced.  What the hell else could it be?  I feel as though I am really about to lose it.  Thoughts of suicide.
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Avatar_m_tn
From what I understand, once your body built antibodies to the genital infection, it made it extremely unlikely to spread the infection to other parts of your body.  It seems like it's technically possible, but very, very unlikely.  Unfortunately, the only way to tell for sure would be to have a new sore cultured.  
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897535_tn?1295210035
You've been seen by several medical providers and they told you it wasn't herpes. No reason to doubt them at this point. Autoinoculation is rare, and when it does occur it's usually during a primary outbreak. Sounds more anxiety driven than anything else, consider talking to your doctor in finding a good counselor. I say this from experience not out of judgment.
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi, thanks for your replies.  Yes, from what I understand, (and i have read A LOT) autoinoculation is rare after primary episode too.  That why I am so perplexed about the thing on my lip, followed by the itchiness of my face and aching mouth pain.  My doctor said the same, if I have one again come in and see him.  I will not come off the anti-virals now though, so maybe there won't be another.  I feel throbbing sometimes on my lip where the sore was.  It coincides with the throbbing on the side of my head too, but only sometimes.  My doc seems to think I might need to go see a neurologist.  Unfortunately I have no health insurance and all my trips to the doctors have already been expensive.  I know from experience that an MRI is about $1000.  Yikes.  

Thank you, I don't feel judged.  I'm pretty sure I need a counselor.
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