Concerned I might have herpes...

Posted this in the general STD forum as well.

In December I had sex with a man. We used a condom during intercourse, and I did not see any sores, rashes, blisters, or lesions on his penis or groin. However, he was having a hard time maintaining an erection, and so for a few minutes I straddled him, but our genitals didn't make contact.

Two weeks later I developed a red itchy spot on my left groin, on the inside curve of the buttock, if that makes sense. I'm not sure if this area of my body even made contact with any part of his body not protected by a condom. The flare up lasted a week or two, and other than that, I don't recall any other symptoms of feeling run down or fatigued. The spot didn't look anything like the pictures one sees of herpes blisters. Since I suffer from eczema and thought perhaps the eczema had found a new place to torture me, I used Elidel in the area and that brought relief from the itching and got the whole area feeling and looking better.The spot didn't turn into a blister/ulcer, but the area where the spot formed was slightly discolored once it healed. I had my annual exam in February and didn't point out the problem to my doctor as it hadn't flared up in a few weeks. He didn't say anything, although he did test for other STDs at the exam.

Over the last 10 months the problem has come back repeatedly. I'll have some itching in the area and upon examination will notice the red spot in the same place. Within a few months, additional little pimple-like spots had formed. All of the spots look like the sores one gets from razor burn. They never become ulcers and they never look like blisters with fluid inside. Every time, a day or two of Elidel brings the itching under control, and the spots go away. I stop using Elidel, and then a few weeks later, it flares up again. I should note also that I'm obese. I have never had the sores anywhere else--not on the other groin, and not on my labia.

Naturally, I'm really hoping I didn't contract an STD like herpes from this encounter. I've been dating someone since February and it makes me sick to think I might have exposed him to something. I don't know how common eczema is in the groin area, and whether I should see my gynecologist or see a dermatologist. I don't know if I could be tested for herpes if the spots aren't flaring up and actively itching. Would Elidel used on a herpes lesion bring relief? Basically, I have a tendency to be anxious and worry needlessly. I don't know if I'm overreacting or if I should be genuinely concerned.