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Could I have gotten herpes
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Could I have gotten herpes

I made a huge mistake about 10 days ago.  I went through and met a guy that I didn't know and he preformed oral sex on me and I on him.  No kissing or anything like that.  I am now freaking out of my mind going did I get herpes.  So I am trying to gather a game plan.  

I have been googling and looking for answers for a while.  But now I am going to ask my own question of Do you think I have it given my situation.

The guy I met claimed to be clean from all diseases and HIV.  When we met I didn't see him having any "signs" of bumps or anything like that.  But I know that isn't a for sure sign of being free from herpes. As I said this was 10 days ago almost 11.  I have been scared that a bump I had around my genitals was herpes. But I think I figured it out as just a ingrown hair.  But today I notice that my lips feel a little burning. all around them.  Like they are puffing up. It started around 11:00 PM.  I shaved today at like 2:45 PM.  I doubt its razor burn but I am not sure.  I am as you can probbaly tell freaking out.  

My first question is can this be a sign of Herpes and/or something else?  

If I go to a hospitial (I am located in the US) can they test for Herpes on site and get me the results?  

Ugh I messed up so bad and I am honestly scared.  Any advice/help much appreciated.
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If you are bothered by symptoms, go and be seen by your provider and have them looked at. it sounds like you are worrying needlessly but follow up on it to get accurate answers.

grace
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I appricate the response.

I saw my provider today and was informed that I can't get oral herpes from preforming oral sex on a man's penise.  I am not sure if this is true or not but I did want to post what was said and see if he is correct and if so maybe reduce my stress.
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101028_tn?1348750963
well yes you can get oral herpes from performing oral sex. you also can get genital herpes from receiving oral sex.

shaving when you had active symptoms is never a good idea.

did your provider say what they thought was going on?

grace
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The provider said that he believes i might be coming down with the flu as the back of my throat was "red" and that it was on coming. He said that the skin looks fine on my face and that it doesn't appear to inflammed and that what I am feeling could be heat sores from the onset of a fever.  I don't know what to believe in honestly he was not a MD he is a FNP.
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101028_tn?1348750963
nurse practitioners get a very good education.  considering the time of year, it is more likely something non-sex related going on too.

you were seen and nothing was standing out at this time. keep your lips well moisturized this weekend and drink plenty of fluids. if you aren't better monday, go back to be seen again.
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Yeah...  I would believe the flu thing but I got a flu shot.  I know that doesn't stop it all.  But I am still scared.  I guess I won't know for a while.  I just wish that they could run a blood test fast and tell me but they didn't appear to have anything like that.  Plus the order I got didn't include that for a test to be done was herpes.  Man am I kicking myself in the *** now.  
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101028_tn?1348750963
flu shots aren't anywhere near 100% effective. Most years they aren't much more than a gesture. Also they only cover influenza - tons of other common germs this time of the year out there.  

Blood tests aren't accurate this early anyways. Give this some time, try to decrease your anxiety about it all and get rest and fluids.

grace

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Would a 21 days after possible exposure be the best time to get a blood test?  What is the soonest best time to get a blood test done?  
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3 months is the soonest.

grace
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Interesting.  Some sites I googled just now are saying you can go in as early as 3 weeks for a test...  It sucks that I can't go before 3 months and get a for sure result.
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101028_tn?1348750963
about 1/2 of newly acquired infections will be detected by 2-3 weeks post infection. If it's negative at that point though you need to go back and get tested later on. You've had no symptoms and this is all anxiety fueling this so save your money and wait and get tested at the point when the vast majority of folks have tested accurately so you can test once and be done with it.

grace
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Thanks for your extreme kindness in dealing with this.  I have seen on some other threads people getting upset and telling posters to "get mental help" for their anxiety.  I find your professionalism and attitude to be top notch and your kindness extremely rare both on the internet and in real life.  Thank you!
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Oh I regularly recommend folks get counseling too...lol. You aren't at that point by no means.  

I can't say I'm exactly innocent myself as far as encounters that seemed like a good idea at the time....lol.  We all do it. Just keep reminding yourself that overall risk was low.  Try to keep it in perspective or you'll start noticing "symptoms" that usually you wouldn't think twice about and just drive yourself nuts needlessly.

grace
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Lol.  I am glad you have a great attitude about things.  Like I said truely a great ideal to have.

Okay so I won't lie.  I freaked out last night completely!  I couldn't sleep and was just beyond stressed and started having some pretty bad chest pains I think. So..  Needless to say I went to the ER.  They checked me I was fine on the heart and all.  I had them look at my itchy feeling down stairs... They looked and couldn't see anything at all.  So that was a good sign because I was really worried as I have been itchy all the time down there.  Feel bad for the poor Dr (female) that examined me.  She said I was fine and that she didn't see anything.  So I was able to sleep.  But sadly I know all the "symptoms" and EVERY pain I have down there and EVERY discomfort I have sets off a flag.  Today even I have I dunno if its a cold sore or something else on my actual lip and I have felt these before its like a pimple on the lip but again concerning because well I don't know if its a outbreak but it is only one so I don't think so.  

I am do find comfort in your stating that the overall risk was low.  That makes me feel better.  I also got in contact with the guy I met with.  He was last with someone about 2 months ago he said so he said he will test soon.  I told him to wait until at least 3 months and if that test comes back clean we should both count our lucky stars.
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Quick question for you...

Is it safe to say that if the guy I was with tests negative at 10 weeks that the result is pretty close to acceptable?  The reason I ask is that I was browsing the Expert forums and Dr HH made the comment that the 10 week test was almost as good as the 12 week test.  I am sure if he tests clean then well I will as well.  I am even willing to pay for his.  What are your professional thoughts on this?  
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I wouldn't worry much if the other guy tested negative at 10 weeks. Just not worth it.

Just itching and nothing else is usually jock itch and not herpes.  

Honestly I think you are worrying far more than it's worth.   It's gotten to the point now where you are having full blown anxiety attacks over it.  Gotta find a better way to deal with your anxiety over it or it'll be a very long next couple of weeks for you ( and very expensive if you need to go to the ER much more ).  So you met a stranger for oral sex.  Doesn't mean you brought home every std in the book.

grace
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Grace,

I love your attitude about this.  You should run for president!  I think you would do a great job!  

The reason to my anxiety is I have a girlfriend and I was dumb this one time and I really don't want to lose her.  I just got super stupid and forgot my priorities.  Let me tell you what this has done...  It has for sure reminded me how much she means to me and how those little things that I love about her and would miss if she leaves me.  Guess the next 9 weeks are going to be long.  Thankfully in a few months she is leaving to go out of town for 3 months.  This would be so very helpful because then I won't be concerned about sharing or anything.  
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Some new things just came up today.  I don't know if what you said is true... I may have gotten the whole STD book...

Today it has just been feeling like I can't empty my bladder fully plus it also feels like I have 2 cuts on me.  I am like 100% more freaking out now.  I don't know if the "cut" feeling is the fact I scratched down there.  But I couldn't tell by looking in a mirror.  I think when I get a chance tomorrow I am going to the free STD clinic offered by the city to be checked.  It also feels like I get something coming out of me I can't stop.  I think I have felt this before but being with all that is going on I can't tell if its safe to ignore.  Also my butt feels like its vibrating sometimes... I am trying so hard to not freak out I really am but I can't help it at this point...  

Add that in with the last email from the stranger I met was yesterday and I have gone off to even offer to pay for his test and he won't respond.  He says he was clean 3 years ago and not sexually active until  he met someone 2 months before me.  He said no symtoms (symptoms) but I know it doesn't matter.

Neither of us ejactulated at all but he did have a little pre-cum.  Just minor touching and the oral part.  Ugh...  I don't know what to do!  I went (and I know what you will say a waste of money) and got a test done today.  I know if it comes back negative not really accurate being it was 2 weeks out. But I know that if it comes back negative still a chance I am not positive.  
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Avatar_f_tn
I dont know if you have went and got tested yet. But I actually have herpes and i got tested 3 days later and ti showed up i ws just reading you twos converstaion and if you ahven' gotten tested you should. Its not worth the first outbreak, trust me. so painful i couldn't even walk, get out of bed, and i couldnt even put my own socks on! So if you haen't already i'd advice yout o get tested.
hope everything works out for you.
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you are still having a lot of anxiety about all of this. you need to follow up on this with your regular provider so you can both address the whole picture including your anxiety. a std clinic isn't going to be covering that part of all of this.

grace
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I figured I would follow up here with my most recent items.  

One of the things I ended up doing was the test at about 2 weeks.  Sadly I knew it was a waste of time but I had to know if by the 2 weeks mark if I was "okay".  I know the results weren't to be trusted but I seriously knew that right now it wasn't positive right now...

So 3 days after the test I got the results and found that they are negative so far.  I throw the so far in because I knew what I said above.  It helped me feel a lot better after reading the comment from you grace and the "expert" comment from Dr. Hook on my other posting.  Both of you saying that the encounter was a "low-risk" for infection.  

I also went to our city health dept clinic that checks for STD's/Prevention.  I was itchy and thinking that maybe I had the lesisons and so forth.  Because I am overweight (I am pretty big sadly) I couldn't see myself. The nice nurse there checked me from head to toe.  They are doing the other STD's blood work aside from herpes.  She explained the same thing that you and Dr. Hook said... The test for herpes was to soon and that the chance of infection was extremely low.  She didn't see jock itch or anything like that so...  But she comforted me in saying that she has seen what the STD's look like very much being that she works in that clinic.  

I still get the random itching and burning feeling but who knows could be just me still worrying.  I would figure that if I had the herpes symptoms (and I am sure I will be corrected if I am wrong) I figure I would have tested positive because my immune system would start responding to it.  But who knows.  I will go back in Feb.
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Grace,

I have been reading that the first outbreak typically happens withing 2-20 days.  Is it safe to say that if the first break hasn't happened by that time typically its a good indication you are still herpes free?  Or does it not operate in such a way?
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Usually a break out will happen within a few days to few weeks...so with all the anxiety you're going through, you'd probably have a bad break out right now.  However, it's possible that you haven't had any symptoms yet. I would just try to stay calm, stds aren't as common as you think.  This guy might not have it.  I'd wait three months and have a blood test done, also have a doctor examine you and if there are any signs have them do a culture if they think it's necessary.

Good luck.
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Well it now appears that I am getting some clear discharge...  I don't know what to make of it.  But it is concerning.  :(
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It sounds like you are spending a lot of time with your private parts worrying. You've been seen and examine and tested for the basics. It's time to come up with a better hobby than your nasty bits don't you think?

grace
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Yeah it is.  But it is bothersom completely.  Sadly I keep seeing different problems.  What sucks is I got one of those UTI kits.  It came up with some WBC being present.  I look it up and it says that if you have a leision in your penis it will cause the WBC to be present.  I sadly am giving up hope that I am negative.  At this point I think I am going to lose my girlfriend and everything else.  Sucks majorly.  I can't wait for 6 Weeks to go by for another test and then the other 6 weeks at that point.
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you also have wbc's in your urine when you have an infection from bacteria too. You really need to get herpes off your brain I think.

grace
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I am reaaalllly trying very very very very much.  Its like a cloud that consumes me.  Because I feel like I have cuts down there and they burn and then I sometimes feel a burn when I go to the bathroom and I never full clear my bladder too.  So I dunno.  

If this was the "outbreak" once it clears up won't the antibodies be present since the body would fight the "infection" at that point.
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I actually think that your next response is going to be the one that says get mental help lol.
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I figured I would stop posting here but was thinking of a journal type deal.  What do you think?
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I think you need to follow up on this with your provider and find out what is really going on.

grace
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Hi Grace,

I had another question of my dumb understanding...

My overall risk was low as stated by you and Dr. Hook.  Furthermore, I would see an outbreak in the spot that I was infected at.  IE: If I gave oral I would have the infection on my lips if he had shedding.  If he was infected orally then I would see the infection in my genitals.  Am I understanding this so far correctly?

Typical first outbreak happens 2-20 days after the possible exposure.  Correct?  So by the fact that now I haven't see any lip sores and nothing on my genitals (which you know I have been inspecting) would you assume that at this point I am kind of out of the woods as they say and possible HSV negative?
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You are probbaly really starting to hate seeing my post come up lol.  Sorry :(
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Hi Grace,

I wanted to quickly ask you something.  First of all my question relates to site of infection. My understanding is that if you have oral sex then then chances of your first outbreak will be in the penis area.  Is this true?  My fear is that I have been having off and on pains around the inside of my butt area.  Given all the "bacterial and fungual" infection I have been diagnoised with my fear is that maybe I am looking in the wrong spot.  Could this impact my anal area right now?

Also is there a known feeling behind the anal version of herpes?  I have been having the off and on pain not so often.  Like this morning I woke up and felt like a quick poking/stabbing pain...  However, before this 2 days ago my scrotum started tingling.  Was just curious what your thoughts are.

I promise once this mess is over I will have to get you a chili's giftcard lol.
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Avatar_m_tn
Hey MG,

It is extremely, if not improbable, that you would get a GH outbreak outside of the site of initial "infection".  For instance, if you received oral sex only on the penis area, then your outbreak would only occur there.  Unless you actively touched open sores (and that would be assuming you had GH, which you don't) and then touched other areas, such as your anus, than it could be spread.  Otherwise, the outbreaks would only occur on where you received oral sex.

If you were in fact to have anal herpes, it would present with similar symptoms as any other genital infections.  You would have a prodome followed by blisters and open sores.  You are only experiencing strange pains and sensations.  This could most easily be caused by anxiety, your over-active imagination creating sensations.  However, it is possible you are experiencing something entirely unrelated to your genital symptoms.  It may be best you see your doctor if your symptoms do not go away, especially if you relax and stop worrying about it.

Also, as you well know MG, I've also been diagnosed with a fungal infection.  And my scrotum has frequent bouts of tingling sensation that comes and goes.  Honestly, this is most likely a result of the yeast infection coupled with the medicated creams.  I doubt its anything to worry about.

-Leap
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Hey Grace,

I wanted to get your thoughts on something.  I am going to go to a clinic shortly but I know that your source of information is far greater then clinics.  Here we go!

I for the last 3-4 days have had this problem with my rectum area.  It feels from random times out of the day that it itchs and hurts.  Mainly feels like little stabbing pain.  I can't check myself there easily because I am a big guy.  Pulling but cheeks apart I have tried but I can't get a good view.  (oh the things we share here lol).  

I haven't had any "blood" and it goes away sometimes and comes back and the itchy feeling kind of remains for a while.  I also feel a pressure right under my waistline kind of like I have a pair of tight pants or shorts on but I don't wear underwear that low or my pants (they are above the belly button).  In the last couple of days the itchy and pain have died down but they are still there randomly.  I was thinking it could have been because of all the BM's I had been having and tp irrating my skin.  Then me "checking" it and causing some damage.  However, I would figure by now that it would have gone away.  

What are your thoughts?  Still need to remove that word from my vocabulary?
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sounds more like a hemorrhoidal  issue than anything else.  You can have internal hemorrhoids and having frequent stools can irritate them.

put away the mirror and stop practicing advanced yoga moves to try to see your hiney in the mirror....lol.  no wonder your abs hurt!

grace

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Hey! I like Yoga but I am a little fat to be doing yoga!

The docotor looked me over today.  Was saying he didn't see anything but did say I need to clean better and that is the cause for the skin irritation and pain I am feeling.  No hemorrhoid that he could see and nothing abnormal back there to suggest lesisions etc.  Felt good still sore though.  I am now more advanced though and use a webcam to check my hiney lol.
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Whata bad day i took my aunt to a doctor apponitment and asked the np seeing her if she would look at the sores on my tongue she did. she looked quickly and said oh my thats herpes coldsore if i have ever seen it. i asked if she was sure and she said its easier for me to say a cold sore.  she offered to do a hsv test but didnt want to swab my sore. i allowed the blood test. but knowing its 9 weeks a negative is not good. i am pretty blown out of the water.
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cold sores rarely reoccur on the tongue.

grace
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I know which is why its weird but I don't know what to think at this point.  *sigh*  I just thought I would post.  Thanks grace!
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Avatar_m_tn
Well dang, she should have swabbed it! Dunno why she wouldn't want to. And why is 9 weeks negative on a test is not good?
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The time to seroconvert and for most test to be accurate is within the 12-16 week range.  There is a 70% though that if negative I will remain negative.  HerpeSelect test will show a fairly accurate picture at 12 weeks.

She didn't want to swab it etc.  
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Ah, well you never did mention anything on your tongue earlier, so I'm guessing that is something new that just came up...interesting. As you know, the same thing has been going on and off with me throughout the month of Feb and now March...but I am going to take Grace's advice and get my mouth swabbed tomorrow since the lesions are still there. Depending on what the Doc tells me tomorrow, I might get another blood test done now that i'm at the 15th week mark. Hopefully, everyone is right in that it is not herpes!  =)
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Oh, that same thing happened to me. My grandma was in the hospital over Christmas, and that was when my first "outbreak" of whatever this is was happening. I decided to get one of the nurses that was seeing her and asked her to look at my tongue. I asked her if she might know what is going on with my tongue. She told me they were lesions and I asked if it was herpes, and she said it could be....but that she was not "trained" in that area, lol. True, she wasn't a dr or an np, but just kind of sucks when someone tells you that though, bleh.
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Yeah.  The tongue thing is new.  But I keep thinking about it the more I think about it the more I think I have had these things before.  Usually comes if I get so busy and I go like a week or so without brushing my teeth and I drink lots of coke/tea.  But I don't know it is literally almost gone right now and there is no real pain anymore.  So I don't know what to take.

Testing after 12 weeks is good.  Best is after 16 weeks.  But I think you will find that you are fine.  Let us know what happens with your results when you get them.
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You go a week without brushing your teeth? That is not very....healthy lol. Well, I hope it isn't herpes. My eyes are starting to burn again when I put eye drops in, bleh. Might make an eye appointment again just to make sure, cuz it just started burning last night with my eye drops. Sigh, endless worrying
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oh I definitely feel a lecture coming on dear if you aren't brushing your teeth twice a day minimum!!!!  absolutely no excuses for that!!!
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Sorry Mom :( I know I am bad.  Just trying to take care of an 87 year old with limited vision and walking issues due to hip surgery and a 58 year old who is limited due to a back injury sustained from work a year ago.  Workmans comp won't fix her up.

I seriously think that is the cause of the sores.  They really aren't that big today as they were yesterday and actually started going down.  Its majorly white though so I don't know.
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Just thought I would update that my 9.5 week test did come back negative.
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That's good news! And do you feel confident that you are negative now?
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I would like to say yes but I am not yet.  Sadly....  My one time cursory exam showed another new "bump".  I have an appointment with the derm again this week so I will go by and let him check this bump out along with my lips that keep burning for the last couple of days.  Oh the life of fear lol.
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Grace we are taking bets in the house on test results at 12 weeks.  Want in on the pool?  Family so far is saying negative.  House is matching buck of buck.  Pot is at 50 smackers so far.
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Yep, that is how I was feeling too. Went to the dr last friday just to ask what it COULD be if it wasn't herpes, since there were obvious "lesions" of some sort. But all he could tell me was that I was negative and that I needed to put herpes behind me. I just laughed and told him I just want to know what is going on with my dang tongue if it isn't herpes, so I asked him for a culture....but of course he ignored my request and just focused on my "anxiety", even though I knew I had anxiety and have it documented in my records, duh.

So pretty much, couldn't get any information out of him, so tomorrow I got an appointment for a dentist to figure out what is going on, since a "new" symptom showed up of some more white gunk type stuff on the top but at the tip on the edge of my geographic tongue sore. Hard to explain, but basically it isn't the normal white stuff that is usually there, but some weird gunk looking stuff that can't really be wiped away...but isn't an ulcer...odd. I'm figuring maybe a buildup of candida bacteria since it does eventually go away in a day or two. And then Friday, my 15th week test of herpes from a new dr just to rest my mind that I am truly negative, since it is within the time frame.

Of course, now my new fear seems to be HIV since I just so happened to read something about HIV causing that buildup in your mouth....sigh. =(
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Well I think you need to remember is this:  Not everything that happens is herpes.  It could be anything your dentist is a good stop on the mouth stuff.  I am not sure what and if they can but maybe ask him to run a culture on the sores.  I would start looking for a new clinic/doctor.  I just had it out with a clinic not to long ago (before my mess started) which ended up getting a NP fired and me 800.00 in cash.  

Your doctors really should work in your care.  I don't put up with a lot of BS and refuseal to do what I ask unless there is a large medically neccesary reason (test or medicine will have long term effects) then I don't see why you won't do what I request.  You also can file a complaint with your states Medical Examiners board.  If I would do that I would say get your P's and Q's in order and take a recoder into your exam to get him on a recording ( I would say tape but everything now is typically digital) of saying no when you push to get it.  

If the tongue thing has been going on for a while (more then 2+) then chances are you aren't looking at herps.  I am not to knowledable on HIV (I could google but I am feeling lazy right now haha).  I doubt HIV as well though.  
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Alright Grace forgive me for asking.  You know I am going to ask because I am interested in learning.  

HerpeSelect is the only test that gets an accurate read at 3 month mark (12 weeks).  Does this apply for both HSV-1 and HSV-2 or is it more so for HSV-2.

Given the results at 9 weeks and that my dermatolgist has examined me head to toe yesterday only stating that my oral bumps were some sweat or something glads.  My lips he said are pretty chapped and that the cuts I have are bleeding a little are related to chapped lives not herpes by any means.

The test at 9 weeks was a HerpeSelect test.  Both values were <0.90.  Given what I have learned from everyone that a 6-8 week test would show about 70% of possible infections.  Combine this with a low risk activity do you feel that I am out of the woods at this point?  Is it safe to trust the HSV-1 result or is the 70% number generally refer to HSV-2 since most IgG test are more sensitive to HSV-2?  

Another werid question I do have is does the body typically respond different if dealing with a genital HSV-1 infection and an oral for example anitbodies are typically easier found for a genital infection compared to an oral one?  Or has this even been studied?
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One should consider reading their post before clicking the famous post comment button.  I mean lips and not lives.  I am sadly not a cat and don't get 9 lives.  Also the Dr. said genital stuff isn't herpes but still fungal infection that he gave me a new medicine for.
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the numbers we discuss are only for hsv2, not hsv1.

bottom line, guilt vs risk dear but you knew that weeks ago.  

grace
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So Grace the advice that is given based on test results only pertains to HSV2. For those concerend about HSV1 what are those numbers? How accurate are the test. I know what I have read but I am guessing they gave some training in interpreting results and what is an accurate window to test for both 1 & 2. Is that where the 12-16 weeks comes into play?
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hsv1 often seroconverts faster than hsv2 actually.

in your own case joe, you have to stop thinking it has to be herpes. Even if you did get a hsv1+ blood test , it still would mean nothing at all as far as what's going on in your genital area. You'd need a + lesion culture for hsv1 to confirm hsv1 genitally.
  
I've been letting a few of the posts from a bunch of you go on because at one point it appeared to be very theraputic for all of you to discuss your symptoms together.  I will draw the line at some point for many of you to be honest.  Not everything is herpes and out of all the years I've been doing on the online message boards where mostly males have insisted that what they have is herpes regardless of how many negative tests they've gotten, I've yet to ever have someone at a later point actually get diagnosed as having herpes.  there comes a point where you have to let go of the idea of herpes being the cause of your symptoms and stop obsessing about it.

grace
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Grace I am truly sorry for stepping out of line.  I was not trying to upset you or further prove that I did have herpes.  I do greatly appologize if it seemed as such.  At this point I will drop the matter completely.  Again I am sorry.
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i was talking to joe dear hence why I addressed the post specifically to him.  you know if you made me mad, I'd just slap you upside the head, ground you for a week and take away your computer.

grace
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Oh I have NO doubt you would ground me.  Take my computer away from me and in order to make the torture worse (hence teach a lesson) you would play computer games IN FRONT of me.  Knowing that I would want to play the game or teach you.  Followed by head slap Gibbs style (NCIS reference).
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I'd play them really poorly too to really torture you  or just sit and play spider solitaire the whole time instead of something really interesting....

I'd also only let you eat vegetables
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Thanks for that reply. It was helpful and reassuring. I have taken the advice of you, Terry and Dr Hook and I have an appointment with a nuerologist. I guess as a guy ....once I get something on my mind it is hard to let it go. I think what has me so hell bent here is that all this happend right after my sexual encounter.
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Well I figure its time for me to make one last post to this thread and let it go away with the wind.  I will post a short brief and long story in my journal.

Grace I will leave the test interperting to you.  

Test Name: HerpeSelect
HSV 1 IGG TYPE SPECIFIC AB <0.90
HSV 2 IGG TYPE SPECIFIC AB <0.90

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