I started seeing a guy who told me he has herpetic whitlow. I like him so I agreed to keep seeing him. We've hung out about 5 times, and have a good connection so we've been making out, dry humping, and mutual masturbation. I am so freaked out that I might catch herpes from him. I won't let his hands touch any mucus membranes on me, but he inevitably touches himself so I'm really scared that he'll spread it to other parts of his body and that I'm going to get herpes from kissing him. I will keep abstaining, but now I'm so afraid that I'm going to get oral hsv 2 from him, even though he's never had an outbreak on/in his mouth. Am I just over reacting? He told me he's had 2 outbreaks on one hand, and he isn't sure about the other. I just really want to know what is the likelihood of passing herpetic whitlow to another person, or if getting herpes from kissing is possible. The stress of this is killing me. I was diagnosed with a treatable std a few months ago so I don't know if I'm being totally irrational towards stds, or if I just realize the likelihood of catching herpes.
Also, I'm in my early 20's so I really really want to stay clean since I'm not sure if this relationship will be long term, but I don't want to break up unless there is no way to avoid becoming infected myself. Any help would be greatly appreciated.