Doctors Never Told Me!

[peterflyest12]

Well it turns out I've had HSV1 for over 2 years now, and my first doctor never told me....

I also just got my 2nd Herpes Select test back today- I already got a Negative biokit while waiting for these result.... so it was no suprise that I came back negative for HSV-II by igg test.
1st results: HSV1- igg 5 HSV2- igg 1.41
Biokit HSV Negative
2nd blood results: HSV1- igg 5 HSV2- igg .31

Now I just was told over the phone, that my primary care physician told me I was "clean" as of October 2011. For god sakes, they knew I was HSV-1 this whole time, and never told me because I came up positive for HSV1 2 years ago, and the doctors never told me. The receptionist at the phone said "we don't tell people, because it's not an STD. It's virtually a clean blood test"
I still would liked to have known I had HSV1. They actually withheld that from me, until I had my false positive for HSV2.

I've gotten three medical opinions from 3 different doctors. One of whom I trust very very very much (who administered my biokit test, showed vast knowledge) . All three of them said I should treat this as a complete negative for STD's and live the rest of my life as if I never got my positive results back. I specifically asked if I should be disclosing my HSV-1 positive status with any future partners. All three DOCTORS said (strongly) NO.
And they all quoted the 90% of all adults have it already statistic.

And I countered with - I can still pass on HSV-1 to someone's gentials......

And they all countered with - the chance is so small, I wouldn't even say anything. Especially since most people already have antibodies for hsv1.

SO..... Is this the end of my herpes adventure? should I finally put my mind to rest, and finally start getting a good nights rest, and start dating again? Should I go back to living my normal, herpes free, disclosure free life, like my doctorS recommended?

[peterflyest12]

I hear that, but I really wish I was back to not knowing.....
I really didn't want to have to "disclose" this type of thing. I reallly don't think I could handle it. Couldn't handle the rejection, and couldn't handle the rumors going around.
if I don't disclose, it'll just sit in the back of my mind, all the time. and if I do? lol I guess I won't be enjoying the oral sex either, because it wouldn't be happening. Even if the person I told was HSV1+ herself, she might not even know it like I didn't know.
I just wish  I didn't know. Because even not disclosing, I can't enjoy it knowing I know and didn't say anything....

[gracefromHHP]

you know this is your mind making you think this way, not the reality of living with oral herpes?  you aren't a walking biohazard for pete's sake!!!

[peterflyest12]

I don't know. What I do know is, that I've hooked up with Many people in my 24 years, and not a single one has ever told me, or asked me about cold sores, or anything like that..... and statistically half of them had it.....
I guess ignorance is bliss, eh? I feel like I'll never enjoy a kiss, or giving oral sex as much as I used to...

[gracefromHHP]

it's part of being open and honest in a relationship.

also wouldn't  you feel like poop if you transmitted your hsv1 to your partners genital area and then have to tell them after the fact that you knew you had and didn't tell them?

[peterflyest12]

I don't know if its policy... but they didn't tell me. I was under the impression I was clean as of the test I had in Oct 2011.
I was HSV-1 positive without knowin i until Feb. 2013.
I don't want to sue anyone, my doctor was a cool guy....
I just wanted to live a normal life.... part of me wishes I didn't know.... everyone tells me not to say anything, not because they want me to hide my H+ status, but because they genuinely believe pretty much everyone has it, and most people live with this risk every day because most ppl don't know they have it (like I did)

[gracefromHHP]

you don't reach rates of 80% infection with hsv1 until you start collecting retirement pay.  If you are under 30, a little over half of people you know has hsv1. We always recommend talking about hsv1 when you know you have it since you can transmit it to a partner. You and a partner can't make educated decisions about what precautions to take until you know who has what so disclosing your own known hsv1 infection is a good way to start the conversation about herpes and other std's in general.  

http://www.ashastd.org/std-sti-works/Herpes/oral-herpes.html  has terrific info on oral herpes for more reading.

also your doctor's office is legally obligated to inform patients of + test results. if their policy is to not disclose + hsv1, they can be sued.