Ex has HSV 2, worried

[Hello213]

Me and my ex broke up about 9 months ago, since then she got into a relationship with a guy who cheated on her and apparently gave her herpes (she said she got tested and that concluded that she had it). I didnt know this before, and I met with her last night and we had a brief sexual encounter, we used a condom, but I dont know if it covered the whole shaft. I also rubbed my penis on the clitoral part of her vagina and had vaginal fluid on it before we started protected sex. It was about 5 minutes after, we stopped because she told me. I immediately got into the shower and scrubbed my genital region with soap and tee trea shampoo.
Some extra bits of info:
- She told me she had an outbreak 2 months ago, and nothing since
- She assured me that she had zero symptoms during our encounter
- She said the outbreak area was towards the bottom of her vagina
- I also used my finger in her and had a graze from earlier in the night on the knuckle

Please tell me what my risk is, because Im going out of my mind with worry right now.

Thank you

[daisy315]

It's quite difficult to say what your risk was since there seems to have been unprotected sexual contact prior to the condom, Herpes is a very unpredictable virus and there would be no guarantee that you didn't contract it from this encounter as skin to skin contact can transmit it even when no lesions are present,as for your finger well that too could be an issue as there is a condition called Herpes Whitlow that can affect the finger if the virus comes in contact with broken skin.
Are you saying she told you AFTER the event ? or were you aware before you started ?
Stopping and going to the shower to scrub would do nothing other than to aggravate your penis and make your partner feel pretty humiliated I would imagine when I'm sure she already feels very insecure about it all ..... a bit of diplomacy on your part wouldn't have gone amiss!  after all it takes two to tango.

Daisy

[Hello213]

She told me during, and thats when I immediately stopped and washed. Im going out of my mind with worry about this. She said she had her first outbreak 2 months ago and has had nothing since, and felt no symptoms at all.

This happened friday, and I dont have any symptoms. I really am driving myself nuts here worrying

[daisy315]

I'm sorry to say there is no guarantee that transmission didn't take place however I do think your risk was low, you should get tested at around 16 weeks or if any unusual blistery type lesions appear before that period you can have a swab taken.
It was very irresponsible of her not to tell you before engaging in any sexual practise but then again perhaps you should have asked ..... it's a very sensitive subject I know but always best to make sure everything is Ok before the event even if you DID have an uneventful relationship before, you don't know who she'd been with since the break up, but that cuts both ways she doesn't know what you've been up to either, so it's really down to how much trust you had in eachother which by all accounts wasn't much when she didn't feel it neccesary to tell you about this before you got down to business.
Two sided coin here methinks.

Daisy