Genital HSV-1....what are the rules?

I'm newly diagnosed.  My doctor did a swab test on some genital lesions and which came out positive for HSV-1 and negative for HSV-2.  Since more than half the people have HSV-1, what are the rules for telling people that may be sexual partners?  I think the unspoken rule in the gay community is that nobody says anything.  Since HSV-1 can be transmitted by oral sex, should people that occaisionally get cold sores tell their partner on date #2 if it looks like there is interest?  Whoever heard of that?

[gracefromHHP]

I think you owe it to yourself and your partners to let them know that you have hsv1 genitally before you are sexually active with them. Even though the risk of transmission is low, depending on your age group depends on the likelihood that your partner will already have hsv1 themselves or not. Also keep in mind that hsv2 infection rates range anywhere from 50-70% of gay males so you still need to be talking about herpes and protecting yourself from hsv2 since you still can get that.  Since hsv2 has been shown to increase the odds of being infected with hiv - this is certainly something you want to be talking to partners about. Talk about your herpes status up front and then you don't have to worry about it later on.  

I do advocate talking about oral herpes too before performing oral sex.  I personally don't talk about it before kissing but I do bring it up before oral.  

grace