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HSV 2 and IgA Deficiency-Need Advice
Hello,
I have been in a committed, monogamous relationship for 3 1/2 years with a woman who is IgA deficient. I was previously married, again monogamous relationship for 26 years. I was divorced, and had a relationship with a woman for 1 year, always with protected sex. I had a vasectomy after that 1 year relationship and met my partner of 3 1/2 years. We have always had unprotected sex.
I have never had a cold sore, and never any symptoms of HSV 1 or 2. My partner who is IgA deficient has an oral outbreak of cold sores several times a year, and has had since she was a teenager. After 3 years in this relationship, I contracted what turned out to be HSV 2. Because of the 3 years of commitment and no previous history of any symptoms I thought I had a spider bite. A culture test was done on the lesion to confirm HSV 2.
I am still wondering how i got the herpes 2? My partner immediately had a blood test done (I do not know what type) and she says it was negative for HSV. 5 days prior to my outbreak, she had a mouth outbreak, and I touched the open sores, and without washing touched myself near my penis, in exactly the same place I had the outbreak. She swears her blood test was negative for HSV, but again I do not know what type of test she had, however we have broken up after 3 1/2 years because of this. Since she is IgA deficient, can she carry HSV 2 and not have the antibodies in her blood, that would show up on a test?
It is a little to late as we have parted after 3 1/2 years but I would like some answers.
Thank You.
I have been in a committed, monogamous relationship for 3 1/2 years with a woman who is IgA deficient. I was previously married, again monogamous relationship for 26 years. I was divorced, and had a relationship with a woman for 1 year, always with protected sex. I had a vasectomy after that 1 year relationship and met my partner of 3 1/2 years. We have always had unprotected sex.
I have never had a cold sore, and never any symptoms of HSV 1 or 2. My partner who is IgA deficient has an oral outbreak of cold sores several times a year, and has had since she was a teenager. After 3 years in this relationship, I contracted what turned out to be HSV 2. Because of the 3 years of commitment and no previous history of any symptoms I thought I had a spider bite. A culture test was done on the lesion to confirm HSV 2.
I am still wondering how i got the herpes 2? My partner immediately had a blood test done (I do not know what type) and she says it was negative for HSV. 5 days prior to my outbreak, she had a mouth outbreak, and I touched the open sores, and without washing touched myself near my penis, in exactly the same place I had the outbreak. She swears her blood test was negative for HSV, but again I do not know what type of test she had, however we have broken up after 3 1/2 years because of this. Since she is IgA deficient, can she carry HSV 2 and not have the antibodies in her blood, that would show up on a test?
It is a little to late as we have parted after 3 1/2 years but I would like some answers.
Thank You.
you can't physically see shedding. dry, flaky skin is an unrelated issue. that said, conditions like that can trigger shedding of the virus so when it's present, avoid sex until the skin is back to normal.
does shedding occur even when obvious symptoms aren't present? yes it does. daily suppressive therapy reduces this shedding by 80% on average - it's significant help.
http://www.medhelp.org/user_journals/show/8280/how-should-I-treat-my-genital-herpes is a journal post I wrote a few years back that I think will help you with the how to treat questions :)
does shedding occur even when obvious symptoms aren't present? yes it does. daily suppressive therapy reduces this shedding by 80% on average - it's significant help.
http://www.medhelp.org/user_journals/show/8280/how-should-I-treat-my-genital-herpes is a journal post I wrote a few years back that I think will help you with the how to treat questions :)
Hello Grace,
I have discussed this with my partner and yes she is OK with the suppressive therapy. I have some specific concerns that my MD could not answer, even though he said he sees a lot of HSV2 weekly. Can you help with this regarding when the virus is active:
I have had 2 outbreaks in 10 months. I feel a tingling and notice dry, flaky skin. Is this the prodrome and "shedding". Can the "shedding" occur even when no visible flaking is taking place? I am in very good physical shape, so I don't take any medications, for BP, Cholesterol, etc. The idea of taking a pill every day is foreign to me, but if it will help control transmission to my partner, i will do it.
My partner is paranoid of the "shedding" when no symptoms are obvious. I am new to this, and told her I see the dry flaking skin (base of penis) along with the itching. Is that the shedding, or is it even more subtle? I want to contact my MD for a script for suppressive therapy. Is one med better than others? Does the suppressive therapy really lower the risk of transmission significantly? I do not take any meds, so this is hard for me. I was on 1g of Valacyclovir 3X day for initial outbreak and it made me really sick. That was 3 grams per day!
Thank You for your help,
Indigo2012
I have discussed this with my partner and yes she is OK with the suppressive therapy. I have some specific concerns that my MD could not answer, even though he said he sees a lot of HSV2 weekly. Can you help with this regarding when the virus is active:
I have had 2 outbreaks in 10 months. I feel a tingling and notice dry, flaky skin. Is this the prodrome and "shedding". Can the "shedding" occur even when no visible flaking is taking place? I am in very good physical shape, so I don't take any medications, for BP, Cholesterol, etc. The idea of taking a pill every day is foreign to me, but if it will help control transmission to my partner, i will do it.
My partner is paranoid of the "shedding" when no symptoms are obvious. I am new to this, and told her I see the dry flaking skin (base of penis) along with the itching. Is that the shedding, or is it even more subtle? I want to contact my MD for a script for suppressive therapy. Is one med better than others? Does the suppressive therapy really lower the risk of transmission significantly? I do not take any meds, so this is hard for me. I was on 1g of Valacyclovir 3X day for initial outbreak and it made me really sick. That was 3 grams per day!
Thank You for your help,
Indigo2012
make sure she hasn't had any other partners, if she has, she needs to cover her std testing bases at the proper times too.
I'd have her retest for hsv2 again too just to err on the side of caution. her having hsv1 previously would make her less likely to notice a hsv2 infection if she had happened to have contracted it from you around the time of your first obvious recurrence.
have you two talked about precautions? if she is in favor of suppressive therapy to lower her risk, by all means start on it. It is effective after 5 days of starting it.
I'd have her retest for hsv2 again too just to err on the side of caution. her having hsv1 previously would make her less likely to notice a hsv2 infection if she had happened to have contracted it from you around the time of your first obvious recurrence.
have you two talked about precautions? if she is in favor of suppressive therapy to lower her risk, by all means start on it. It is effective after 5 days of starting it.
Hello,
I just received the best Christmas present I could ask for. The gal I have been with for 3 1/2 years and we recently broke up because of the virus, has gotten back with me and wants to move forward. I need advice on what to do next. Our intimacy has always been stellar, so I want to be able to move forward in an educated, safe manner.
Should I get on a suppressive dose of acyclovir? The area that I get an outbreak is at the base of my penis, so a condom will not cover this. What do you recommend for that? I have had 2 outbreaks in 10 months. I feel a tingling and notice dry, flaky skin. Is this the prodrome and "shedding". Can the "shedding" occur even when no visible flaking is taking place? I am in very good physical shape, so I don't take any medications, for BP, Cholesterol, etc. The idea of taking a pill every day is foreign to me, but if it will help control transmission to my partner, i will do it.
Thank You for your support, knowledge and advice. I look forward to hearing your thoughts.
Thank You,
Indigo2012
I just received the best Christmas present I could ask for. The gal I have been with for 3 1/2 years and we recently broke up because of the virus, has gotten back with me and wants to move forward. I need advice on what to do next. Our intimacy has always been stellar, so I want to be able to move forward in an educated, safe manner.
Should I get on a suppressive dose of acyclovir? The area that I get an outbreak is at the base of my penis, so a condom will not cover this. What do you recommend for that? I have had 2 outbreaks in 10 months. I feel a tingling and notice dry, flaky skin. Is this the prodrome and "shedding". Can the "shedding" occur even when no visible flaking is taking place? I am in very good physical shape, so I don't take any medications, for BP, Cholesterol, etc. The idea of taking a pill every day is foreign to me, but if it will help control transmission to my partner, i will do it.
Thank You for your support, knowledge and advice. I look forward to hearing your thoughts.
Thank You,
Indigo2012
you can get the risk of transmission to a female partner down to 2-3%/year. If you are aware of your infection, take suppressive therapy, use condoms and avoid sex any time you have anything going on genitally, your partner is going to be far more likely not to contract herpes than to contract it from you. It's the folks who aren't aware of their infections that are the biggest problem and since 1 out of 3 has hsv2 once you get over 50, it's something all adults need to be aware of and dealing with.
Most people know nothing about herpes other than being told all their lives - herpes, you don't want that sh*t. no one has taken the time to educate them and point out how common it is as well as how low the risk of transmission is if your partner is aware of their infection. Darn shame because it's incredibly common and with a little effort you can get the risk down incredibly low.
the side effects of the valtrex dose you were taking were going to be hard to deal with. first off you were given the wrong dose for starters plus the higher first ob doses are the highest you ever take. You can take once a day 500mg valtrex or acyclovir 400mg twice a day for suppressive therapy. it reduces shedding of the virus significantly and reduces ob's significantly too. Keeps your sex life from being uninterrupted with recurrences as well as protects your partner :)
keep asking questions!
Most people know nothing about herpes other than being told all their lives - herpes, you don't want that sh*t. no one has taken the time to educate them and point out how common it is as well as how low the risk of transmission is if your partner is aware of their infection. Darn shame because it's incredibly common and with a little effort you can get the risk down incredibly low.
the side effects of the valtrex dose you were taking were going to be hard to deal with. first off you were given the wrong dose for starters plus the higher first ob doses are the highest you ever take. You can take once a day 500mg valtrex or acyclovir 400mg twice a day for suppressive therapy. it reduces shedding of the virus significantly and reduces ob's significantly too. Keeps your sex life from being uninterrupted with recurrences as well as protects your partner :)
keep asking questions!
Hello Grace,
Thank You for your support again. I do wish I had found this site 6 months ago. I most likely would still be in the relationship that I now mourning. I am very aware that I am not ready yet to date, but thank you for that. I am working on myself, and the fact that I do have herpes (I will get a confirmation-but the culture came back with results that simply said "positive-HSV2" and it was a swab test-Dr. actually had to open the sore with the swab-that really hurt!)
I love big dogs and I like really smart women-so maybe there is hope on the horizon. I have not shared the prognosis with anyone else but my ex. My own MD wishes I had indeed gotten the blood test results from my ex-he is quite sure that i got it from her, I may never know. She being IgA deficient is so scared of contracting any virus, I can't imagine she lied to me. She does get some nasty cold sores however.
I get it about a lot of messed up people out there....thanks again for your words of insight and kindness. By the way, initially I was put on Valacyclovir 1gram, 3X a day which made me quite nauseous. As sick as I was with the initial symptoms, I could not get past the nausea so I quit taking it. Is there an alternative? I am referencing your comment about "a virus you can control with a pill or two a day". Will anything help the shedding in the future? I do have a very strong immune system. It was the idea of shedding that made my ex really paranoid, as if I was now a leper, she did not want me in her bed. That has been hard to handle, as we had a great intimate life prior. I guess I am now arming myself with the knowledge to move ahead, a little to late, but better now than never.
Thank You,
Thank You for your support again. I do wish I had found this site 6 months ago. I most likely would still be in the relationship that I now mourning. I am very aware that I am not ready yet to date, but thank you for that. I am working on myself, and the fact that I do have herpes (I will get a confirmation-but the culture came back with results that simply said "positive-HSV2" and it was a swab test-Dr. actually had to open the sore with the swab-that really hurt!)
I love big dogs and I like really smart women-so maybe there is hope on the horizon. I have not shared the prognosis with anyone else but my ex. My own MD wishes I had indeed gotten the blood test results from my ex-he is quite sure that i got it from her, I may never know. She being IgA deficient is so scared of contracting any virus, I can't imagine she lied to me. She does get some nasty cold sores however.
I get it about a lot of messed up people out there....thanks again for your words of insight and kindness. By the way, initially I was put on Valacyclovir 1gram, 3X a day which made me quite nauseous. As sick as I was with the initial symptoms, I could not get past the nausea so I quit taking it. Is there an alternative? I am referencing your comment about "a virus you can control with a pill or two a day". Will anything help the shedding in the future? I do have a very strong immune system. It was the idea of shedding that made my ex really paranoid, as if I was now a leper, she did not want me in her bed. That has been hard to handle, as we had a great intimate life prior. I guess I am now arming myself with the knowledge to move ahead, a little to late, but better now than never.
Thank You,
like I said, just confirm that it was definitely typed as hsv2.
honestly my herpes is the least of my problems when dating. I've had more men run away from the size of my dogs ( I like them big ) , the hours I keep ( I work nights ) and because I am too smart for them ( yep, have been told that many times now ). Only 2 fellows in the 25 years I've had hsv2 have not wanted to date because of my hsv2. Most guys I date, don't even stick around long enough to talk about my hsv2! Lots of messed up people out there who don't know what they want out of life - far more of an issue than a virus you can control with a pill or two a day.
so how do you move on? give yourself time to mourn the end of your prior relationship. You aren't ready yet to date someone new. over time, the idea of having herpes gets easier to deal with. have you talked about all of this with any of your friends to get used to talking about herpes with others?
honestly my herpes is the least of my problems when dating. I've had more men run away from the size of my dogs ( I like them big ) , the hours I keep ( I work nights ) and because I am too smart for them ( yep, have been told that many times now ). Only 2 fellows in the 25 years I've had hsv2 have not wanted to date because of my hsv2. Most guys I date, don't even stick around long enough to talk about my hsv2! Lots of messed up people out there who don't know what they want out of life - far more of an issue than a virus you can control with a pill or two a day.
so how do you move on? give yourself time to mourn the end of your prior relationship. You aren't ready yet to date someone new. over time, the idea of having herpes gets easier to deal with. have you talked about all of this with any of your friends to get used to talking about herpes with others?
Thank You for your support. As I said, I have been in a very faithful relationship that ended because I had my first outbreak 3 years into the relationship. I was also very faithful for the 26 years I was married, and my wife never showed symptoms of HSV2. Only one other woman since I was divorced, and I used protection every time, and she never said that she had HSV2. I have known her for over 20 years, it was not a casual fling.
I have it, tested positive on a culture from the lesion, and have only had one outbreak since (now) in the 6 months since. This is near my penis.
I need to move forward, so how hard is it to meet and keep new people when you tell them right away that you have genital herpes. I am still in the shock faze, I lost a great person when she found out after 3 years. We just broke up 3 weeks ago, but the herpes was the reason.
How do I move on with the virus?
Thank you.
I have it, tested positive on a culture from the lesion, and have only had one outbreak since (now) in the 6 months since. This is near my penis.
I need to move forward, so how hard is it to meet and keep new people when you tell them right away that you have genital herpes. I am still in the shock faze, I lost a great person when she found out after 3 years. We just broke up 3 weeks ago, but the herpes was the reason.
How do I move on with the virus?
Thank you.
Yes I did mean hsv2. sorry about that. just woke up a bit ago and not quite awake yet.
her iga deficiency has nothing to do with any of this actually.
just make sure that your lesion culture was definitely typed to know it's hsv2 and not just + for herpes and assumed hsv2 since it was genital.
even the best blood tests still miss 1 out of every 10 hsv1 infections. not unusual at all for it to not pick up on her hsv1 infection. since you are no longer together, no way to know if her provider gave her igg blood testing or not. what is important is knowing your own status for future relationships. in your age group, 1 out of every 3 people you know has hsv2 and almost everyone has hsv1.
odds are that none of your former partners ever had herpes testing done either. you could've had this for 30 years, 10 years, 5 years - no way to figure that part out at this point if your last partner tested negative for hsv2 on igg blood testing.
her iga deficiency has nothing to do with any of this actually.
just make sure that your lesion culture was definitely typed to know it's hsv2 and not just + for herpes and assumed hsv2 since it was genital.
even the best blood tests still miss 1 out of every 10 hsv1 infections. not unusual at all for it to not pick up on her hsv1 infection. since you are no longer together, no way to know if her provider gave her igg blood testing or not. what is important is knowing your own status for future relationships. in your age group, 1 out of every 3 people you know has hsv2 and almost everyone has hsv1.
odds are that none of your former partners ever had herpes testing done either. you could've had this for 30 years, 10 years, 5 years - no way to figure that part out at this point if your last partner tested negative for hsv2 on igg blood testing.
Hello Grace,
Thank You for your prompt reply, but now I am really confused. Did you mean that I was HsV2+ prior to meeting my ex? You stated HsV1, which I have never had any symptoms of. My ex has always had the cold sore outbreaks since she was a teenager. Does her being IgA deficient affect her being tested, or being a "carrier" without actually being symptomatic of HsV2? That is one of the reasons she was so scared when told her my "spider bite" was indeed HsV2.
Does the back trauma at L5/S1 have anything to do with my initial outbreak? I have a very strong immune system, always have had. I injured my back and had a laminectomy at that site 3 weeks after my HsV2 outbreak. I had a fever, groin numbness, bad headache, and just one open sore on my lower abdomen (it looked like a spider bite) about 3" from my penis area. I wanted to see a physician with her for advice, but she had a "blood test" and said she was negative (despite the cold sores for 35 years). I never saw the blood test. My physician wishes I had. I want to know if the virus could have laid dormant for 30 years? That would have been before I was married, and I have never had any symptoms of anything until this.
Thank you, I am still looking for answers for her as well. Does the IgA deficiency affect her testing negative and could she be a carrier?
Thank you.
Thank You for your prompt reply, but now I am really confused. Did you mean that I was HsV2+ prior to meeting my ex? You stated HsV1, which I have never had any symptoms of. My ex has always had the cold sore outbreaks since she was a teenager. Does her being IgA deficient affect her being tested, or being a "carrier" without actually being symptomatic of HsV2? That is one of the reasons she was so scared when told her my "spider bite" was indeed HsV2.
Does the back trauma at L5/S1 have anything to do with my initial outbreak? I have a very strong immune system, always have had. I injured my back and had a laminectomy at that site 3 weeks after my HsV2 outbreak. I had a fever, groin numbness, bad headache, and just one open sore on my lower abdomen (it looked like a spider bite) about 3" from my penis area. I wanted to see a physician with her for advice, but she had a "blood test" and said she was negative (despite the cold sores for 35 years). I never saw the blood test. My physician wishes I had. I want to know if the virus could have laid dormant for 30 years? That would have been before I was married, and I have never had any symptoms of anything until this.
Thank you, I am still looking for answers for her as well. Does the IgA deficiency affect her testing negative and could she be a carrier?
Thank you.
it's unfortunate you guys didn't find the forum first before breaking up :(
odds are that neither of you have ever been tested for herpes before to know your status. if you had a lesion culture that was hsv2+ and your partner was properly tested and was hsv2 negative, then you know you had hsv1 prior to meeting her and just never knew it. Not an unusual situation at all - most folks who have hsv2, never know it until they get tested or have an obvious recurrence that gets them seen and properly diagnosed.
grace
odds are that neither of you have ever been tested for herpes before to know your status. if you had a lesion culture that was hsv2+ and your partner was properly tested and was hsv2 negative, then you know you had hsv1 prior to meeting her and just never knew it. Not an unusual situation at all - most folks who have hsv2, never know it until they get tested or have an obvious recurrence that gets them seen and properly diagnosed.
grace
I am obviously new to the forum here. I typed up all of the information that was pertinent to my Herpes 2/ IgA deficiency question and was told I had too many characters, so I shortened it.
This was my first episode of any kind of Herpes, ever (was HSV2-cultured) I had a lot of groin numbness, fever, headache and the blister which is why I thought it was a spider bite. This was obviously my first outbreak, I was very sick. I also had severe nerve involvement L5/S1 for a back injury, that led to surgery 3 weeks after the outbreak. My gal and I broke up after 3 1/2 years over this HSV2 outbreak, Could I have gotten it from her (she is IgA deficient, blood tests were negatve) or did this lay dormant for almost 30 years, until the back trauma? Does that happen? Please, any help appreciated. I lost the love of my life, and I did not cheat on her.
This was my first episode of any kind of Herpes, ever (was HSV2-cultured) I had a lot of groin numbness, fever, headache and the blister which is why I thought it was a spider bite. This was obviously my first outbreak, I was very sick. I also had severe nerve involvement L5/S1 for a back injury, that led to surgery 3 weeks after the outbreak. My gal and I broke up after 3 1/2 years over this HSV2 outbreak, Could I have gotten it from her (she is IgA deficient, blood tests were negatve) or did this lay dormant for almost 30 years, until the back trauma? Does that happen? Please, any help appreciated. I lost the love of my life, and I did not cheat on her.
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Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
