This forum is an un-mediated, patient-to-patient forum for questions and support regarding herpes issues such as: Herpes symptoms and treatments, causes, diagnosis, and herpes in men, tests, telling your spouse or partner.
I was having some irritation and blisters forming on my genital area and decided to go into the doctor yesterday, about 5 seconds into the appointment I found out that I now have genital herpes for the rest of my life. I just have a few questions because this is so new to me and I never really thought this would happen. My partner who I received this from has no health insurance and was unaware that he also had this. Obviously, we can't keep getting it from each other now but is there any way that it could be spread from the genitals to the mouth? Even though my partner is not having an outbreak right now should he still be taking medications? If I am having an outbreak could that cause him to have an outbreak too? And also what is the depression rate for people with genital herpes? I don't think Ive ever been a depressed person but honestly Im not sure how to handle this news. Are there support groups for this type of thing? how would you go about getting signed up? and do they work? Also another question, I have been doing a lot of crying so if I use the restroom and wash my hands then proceed to rub my eyes is there a chance that it could spread to my eyes and facial area? Thanks
5 seconds? Was this a visual diagnosis? Did the doc do a swab/culture? Only testing can confirm whether you have herpes or not. You both should be tested at this point and not assume he has it. An IgG type specific test would be used for diagnosing herpes.
Become educated even further by reading the Herpes Handbook here:
Yes this was a visual diagnosis, the doctor took a culture and I am waiting to hear my results to see if I have HSV 1 or 2 but all she said was that I deffinatley have it. Right now I would say I am having a sever break out because I have many sores and it is extremely painful I hear the first is the worst but I dont want this at all. My doctor also wrote down for my boyfriend what the virus was so when he goes to the doctor they will know exactally what to look for. Im positive it came from him because the last time I was tested I was negative for everything and the only person Ive been with between now and then was him. Also he doesnt have health insurance and cant be tested or treated because neither of us have an extra grand laying around. This has just been terrible so far even though its only been a day I just cant seem to get over the stigma that will forever be a part of me now and I really feel like Im falling into a state of depression. thank you for your advice its nice to know that people care because this isnt really something that you go around talking about and its hard to get the support you need in situations like this. Ive started a list of questions to talk to my doctor about but it still makes it very hard all information is welcome Im just in a confused state of mind and cant stop thinking how this could have happened
Wait for the swab results. A visual diagnosis is not always accurate.
Your BF can go to a clinic that offers a sliding scale to pay - even a planned parenthood. You certainly don't need a grand!
Standard STD screenings do not test for herpes, so unless you specifically received IgG blood test results, you most likely weren't tested previously.
Did you read any of the handbook?
Once you have received your test results, and if it comes back positive, consider this book for you and your BF: "The Good News About the Bad News" - it goes into far more detail and is very helpful for newly diagnosed people and their partners.
Here are some other tips in dealing with an outbreak:
Outbreaks can be anywhere from mildly uncomfortable to very painful. What can you do for pain relief? Don't hesitate to sit with an ice pack in between your legs too if you need to. Unless you have a medical reason not to - try alternating Tylenol with ibuprofen (Advil/Motrin) for pain relief comparable to some narcotics - ie Tylenol 1000 mg at 6 am, 600 mg Advil at 9, Tylenol at noon, Advil at 3 am etc. Also look for Dermoplast spray (the blue can for the genital area, not the red can) or another topical anesthetic spray - ask your pharmacist.
Keep the affected area as dry as possible and wear no underwear (if possible) to let the air get at the area. The dryer that you keep the area the faster it will heal. When coming out of the shower use your hair dryer on a lower setting to dry the area so that way you do not have to rub it with a towel.
Apply cornstarch by sprinkling it on to the affected area as cornstarch helps to keep the area dry.
To decrease the itching at night and to get a good nights sleep take Benadryl before bed time to get that good nights sleep.
Finally if going to the bathroom is painful run water over the area, urinate in a tub or shower. All these help to dilute the acid in the urine.
If you have a lesion in an area that is causing a lot of pain and if it is so positioned that by putting a finger or two on it then put some thing on your hand and cover the area by pressing down and covering the area which will make it less painful to go to the bathroom.
To make you feel better as well bath in either Aveeno or Epsom salts to sooth your aching body
Thank you so much for your advice and support I really appreciate everything I am going to order myself a copy of that book so I can have it for my boyfriend and myself. Im so glad to know that even though it will be here for life that there are things I can do to make it more comfortable for myself and I will definitely use the epsom salt and aveeno! but I actually purchased an anti-itch bath soak from aveeno a while back when I got mites (I know, I have a lot of medical things wrong with me lol) but would that work? or would the anti-itch formula inside irritate me more? also one more question my doctor gave me some lidocaine jelly to numb the area so it doesn't cause me much pain but everywhere that Ive seen they want you to keep the area dry, so would that prolong my heal time? or is that safe to use whenever I need it for pain and discomfort?
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