Hsv ?

My boyfriend and I have been togethet a little over five yrs. About 10yrs ago I was sexually assaulted by 2 different individuals.  I remember having what I now know was an outbreak after that, which I attributed to all the damage and scarring that was there from the assault.  Years later I had something similar and the doctor said it was just a reaction to change in soap/detergents  or nic from shavingand sent me on my way, no culture or anything.  So here I am now went and got tested in aug had them do all blood work and hsv2 shows up.  It didnt even surface when I was pregnant recently before that. I know I havent been with anyone but him in these years, but he has had an out break on his genitals and something on the inside of his top lip that comes and goes.  He wont go with me to be properly diagnosed bc 9 times out of 10 its hsv.  But every little itch he gets-  its herpes. Tingle in the arm herpes, itch on the butt, herpes, we were playing around, my nail scratched him on the hand and bc we had intercourse hours before he tells me he is going to get an outbreak on his hands. Ive read as much as him but it this possible? He wont have anything that shows up tested but dies the disease function that way where it will just go anywhere? I thought it was the same spot repeatedly?  Where is he getting this? Am I crazy, can it just come like that?  I am beyond frustrated. Any input would be gratly appreciated.

[pain657311]

I mean honestly, its bad enough that I now relive the incident that I worked so hard to put behind me on a daily basis but I havent had an outbreak and he hates me for that

[gracefromHHP]

your partner needs to be tested to confirm his own status.

no, herpes won't show up on his hands and arms because he has it genitally. Anywhere in the genital area, including the buttocks very well could be herpes but odds are the other body parts are not herpes related.

why not tell your partner enough with the pity party and to stop being difficult and go and get properly tested and be seen when he has symptoms to find out what all is going on?

I'll gladly take a look at your herpes blood test results too if you want to post them here - e.g. hsv1 igg 4.3 and hsv2 igg 4.9 or whatever they are.

grace

[pain657311]

Ive done that, ive begged and pleaded, half the time I dont know any thing is going on. Ive done everything short of doing it myself. But every week its a twitch or something and if he gets close to me (far and few between)  its a epidemic.  I didnt think it could function where it comes every week or even evertime we kiss. I know its unpredictable, but he says hes soo tired and weak..i know hes not imagining the lip and genital stuff but could some of this be psychologiacally induced?

[gracefromHHP]

I shudder to think how long you've been putting up with this behavior from him!!!!  why put up with it? don't you deserve better treatment than this? You never knew you had genital herpes and really at this point you aren't even sure if you had it before him or if you got it from him. why let him continue to blame you for everything and anything that goes on?  If he can't accept it and deal with it, time to move on unless you want to try to work it out together in therapy/counseling.  His behavior is affecting your mental health - time to get help either for yourself or for you both. If he won't go , go for yourself so you don't carry around these feelings needlessly for years and let it affect future relationships you have too. If you  have children together, they deserve to live in a home where the parents are more emotionally healthy don't you agree?

herpes would not make him weak and tired. If he thinks he gets symptoms just being close to you, he certainly needs to seek out professional help from a therapist because that is all in his mind!