Incubation?

[Jagdpanther]

hi

I started showing signs of genital herpes 2 weeks ago, sores, flu, swollen glands, aches, fever,

I have been into 3.5 month relationship with someone who is HSV-1 (cold sores), she reckoned she never shown signs of type 2, and initially denied she has it, what are the chances I caught my type 2 from her?

thanks

[gracefromHHP]

Actually the pockit test isn't available anywhere - it's been off the market for years. the biokit is a point of care hsv2 test and also focus ( makers of the herpeselect ) also now have a hsv2 point of care test too.

grace

[Jagdpanther]

thanks for detailed reply,

I dont think the POCit test is available in our part of the world,

anyway, i guess i should be thankful I did not catch anything worse, I will always believe that i caught it from this person, they have a very promiscuous past and dirty way of living. Should have seen the signs, love is blind, right.

[gracefromHHP]

  Unfortunately there are still  providers out there that think if they just visually examine someone they can tell if they have genital herpes or not.  It very well could be that the provider your gf saw just isn't very herpes aware and gave her very erroneous information unfortunately :(  Ask your gf exactly what tests she had done and see if she can pick up a copy of them next week to share with you.  Maybe once you both see what testing she had done and such you can better work thru all this.  And also she might've had one of the hsv2 point of care blood tests done which do get you results in 20 minutes.  There was no reason to test her for hsv1 since she knows she has cold sores so she might've had one of them done too in the office.

So how were you tested? Did you just have a lesion culture or did you also have a blood test done at the same time?  Also check if it was a lesion culture to see if it was specifically typed as hsv2 or just assumed it was hsv2 since it was genital.  

It's difficult when you are expecting one response from someone and you get another.  I'm sure you were hoping she'd listen to all that you've found out about herpes and presume that there was a chance that she did in fact give it to you and want to pursue full testing to try to figure it out as well as be more sympathetic and empathetic than it sounds she's been.  Denial is a very strong coping mechanism for some folks though so unless there are other red flags in this relationship perhaps don't assume the worst and give both of you some time to absorb all this and work thru it? She might even just be scared to death that you'll be so mad that you'll leave her over this and just doesn't know how to tell you that or something too.  Some folks just don't have adequate coping mechanisms in place to handle situations like this :(  

grace

[Jagdpanther]

thanks for reply,

the "" in quotes below is my now ex's repsonse today after telling her the results

this was the response from my ex

"I went to the clinic on Wednesday and had all the tests. She told me I did not have herpes and even tho I suffered with cold sores it didnt mean that I would have transferred it to you. I asked her if I could still get it from you and she said that it was unlikely now, as i would have shown symptoms before now, especially as you had such a bad outbreak. She told me i could walk out of there with my head held high knowing that i was clean."

"I went to the clinic on Wednesday and had all the tests. She told me I did not have herpes ."

wow, so they give you the results on the spot now, complete rubbish. In abscence of sores, type specific blood tests
are required, which take a week +, and look for antibodies. In fact, half of new cases of HSV occur in people in a stable relationship in which their partner was unaware they ever had herpes or that they were an asymptomatic carrier of the infection.

http://www.ivillage.co.uk/health/whealth/stds/articles/0,,180665_664992,00.html

"I asked her if I could still get it from you and she said that it was unlikely now, as i would have shown symptoms before now.."

dont see the point of that statement, it can take months to show some kind of symptoms.

"She told me i could walk out of there with my head held high knowing that i was clean."

Health care clinics are impartial, they would not make such a statement, it would not be professional conduct as
a doctor.

"You can think what you like, but I know im clean and thats all that matters. Shout and stamp your feet all you like but remember that herpes can sit dormant in the body for years and will only come out when your immune system is low. For me to have passed the virus to you i would have to have had an outbreak myself, and that is something i have never ever had."

"For me to have passed the virus to you i would have to have had an outbreak myself, and that is something i have never ever had"

Not true, most individuals with HSV-2 infection  never have sores, or they have very mild signs that they do not even notice or that they mistake for insect bites or another skin condition.

Genital herpes has reached epidemic proportions in the U.S.; 500,000 are diagnosed each year. One in five American adults has herpes, but only one third of those inflicted are aware that they have the virus. Many people don't relate their symptoms to herpes, since they have either very mild or no symptoms at all

she also says

"I dont know where you've got it from and i really dont give a ****"

i feel she is in complete denial, and not a very genuine person after all

Dave

[daisy315]

If you have a definate HSV2 positive result that doesn't automatically mean you got it from your most recent partner either,it is possible you have had it for some time and been asymptomatic,but from reading between the lines of your original Post I think your partner wasn't 100% honest with you as you say she "initially" denied it which makes me think she told you otherwise after you started to show symptoms of HSV2 if this is the case she has shown little regard for your well being and the possibility she passed it to you is quite likely. The bottom line here is that she should have told you before engaging in unprotected sex,that said you have a resonsibility also to ASK new partners if they have anything you need be concerned about before having any unprotected sex.
I don't know where this puts your relationship now in view of the fact that she was dishonest and put you at risk,that is something for the two of you to settle between you.

Daisy

[Jagdpanther]

sorry, I should have been more specific,

I already have test result, it is type 2

[daisy315]

First of all you don't know you have HSV2 unless you have had a Positive test result,it is possible you may have got HSV1 genitally if your partner has HSV1 and performed oral sex at any time on you ....
The only advice I can give here is to go and have a type specific test done that way you will know for sure whats going on and manage from there onwards.

Daisy