Just found out I have Herpes

Dear, Doc or anyone who can help,

I was just told I have the oral type herpes (type 1 i think?) on my genitals, not on my mouth.  So now I have a few questions...
1)  I am wondering what the chances of spreading it is if my boyfriend fingers me and I am not having an outbreak? Is this common?
2)  How common is it to spread it during sex, with a condom, not during an outbreak?
3)  I know there is a med for him to take to try and prevent from getting it, but is there anything I can take to lower the chances of spreading it?
4) Is there anything random or specific I should know about having herpes that either does or does not involve physical contact with others?

Thank you!

(I accidentally posted this is the wrong section the first time I am sorry!)

[gracefromHHP]

This is not the doctors forum. You need to pay to post there.

oral herpes is herpes of the mouth.  You can have hsv1 or hsv2 in either the oral area or the genital area.  In other words - you can't have oral herpes genitally :)

How were you diagnosed as having genital herpes?

Has your partner been tested to know his status or can he recall a history of cold sores?

grace

[PA909]

I was diagnosed by a doctor looking at me and taking cultures that came back positive for hsv1. I was broken up with my ex when I found out, however i did get it from him. Neither of us knew he had it.  I am currently seeing someone new and he does not know about my situation, but we are not having sex or anything.  I wanted to find out the answers to the questions I asked in my last post before I told him so I could have a better understanding of it and explain it to him better.  So if you can help me out I would really appreciate it! Any information will help! Thank you for your time!

[gracefromHHP]

the herpes handbook at www.westoverheights.com is a terrific resource ( and free ) to learn more about herpes and how to protect a partner.  it's also useful for referring potential partners to too so that they can learn more.

at this point, your new partner needs tested for herpes to know his own status. you can't make educated decisions about what precautions to take until you know who has what. if he has hsv1 himself, your hsv1 genital infection is pretty much a non-issue since he'd have significant protection against contracting hsv1 genitally from you. Always avoid sex during obvious genital symptoms though unless a partner also has hsv1 genitally.

grace