This forum is an un-mediated, patient-to-patient forum for questions and support regarding herpes issues such as: Herpes symptoms and treatments, causes, diagnosis, and herpes in men, tests, telling your spouse or partner.
Let me start by saying I have been with my boyfriend for 1yr 6 months. I have never slept with anyone else since.
We had went on vacation to Bahamas. We are in a long distance relationship at the moment. I see him monthly tho for at least a week or longer.
I had went to visit we was sexually active from Friday to Monday night. Then Wednesday I go in the hot tub for the first time on are cruise ship. I notice something isn't right down there so call my doctor On thursday, they say my symptoms sound like yeast infection. They send me a script to my pharmacy. The meds wasn't working the blisters became worse I was in so much pain I had to go to the emergency room. They did cell culture, and pap smear swabed me, pelvic exam. Test came back positive for herpes simplex 2. I feel so embarrassed, ashamed, dirty. Calling my boyfriend and telling him was so hard to do . This was my first outbreak. I don't know how I got it. At first I was thinking did he cheat on me?? We had sex Friday threw Monday I noticed out break Wednesday. My doctor told me him or myself could of had it from previous partner years ago and never showed symptoms. Is this true. I asked him if he cheated he swears to god he didn't. And I didn't. I'm positive because I had cell culture. He never had no outbreak no symptoms so he is going for a blood test. He is now asking me if I have recently cheated since I'm the one with the outbreak. I been with him never cheated. Could one of us have this virus from a previous partner and just now have a outbreak? Can he have the virus and it be inactive and test negative? I just Dont know wat to expect. I had that out break after 5 days of hooking up and 2 day break in between and bam I got outbreak. If he was negative are chances high he could have got it from me the days I was showing no symptoms?? I'm 24 my boyfriend is 29 this is worst thing I have ever been threw in my life. Having hard time dealing with all these emotions. My minds racing with unanswered questions. I go to my gyno next wed he goes to get blood test Saturday.
odds are that neither of you have ever been tested for herpes before this. his getting tested with a type specific herpes igg blood test is the best next step.
no real reason for you to get blood testing for herpes at this point. if your lesion culture was typed for hsv2, you know what you have and where you have it. blood testing now probably won't help with the who had what first.
most adults have hsv1 orally. most adults never get obvious cold sores to know it. hsv1 is transmitted to the genital area by receiving oral sex. there doesn't have to be an obvious cold sore present in the infected partner to transmit it to a partner.
you know your hsv1 came from your partner. your ob is extensive and typical for a recently acquired genital hsv1 infection.
I'm 43 years old and I have had 8 children. I've been married for 21 years. I contracted herpes when I was 19 years old. I had sex with some guy on the beach in Hawaii...and two days later, I got flu-like symptoms and soon after that sores that felt like paper cuts developed in my vagina. I had NO idea what it was. When I got back from my trip, the sores were still there and hurt something awful. I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with HSV2. I was completely devastated and thought my life was over - ruined. The outbreaks were awful those first two years, probably because of my nerves. I was so sad, thinking that I'd never find a guy who would want to marry me or that maybe I'd never have children. But I'm here to tell you that everything worked out just fine. My husband has been sexually active with me for the past 21 year and so far has shown no signs of catching the virus. Yes, there IS the possibility that he's contracted it through me at some point but is asymptomatic, but honestly we are very careful about it, and as time went on my outbreaks have been less and less, maybe one a year.
It gets better as time goes on.
Usually with your first outbreak (or when you first catch it) you will get flu-like symptoms before the sores show up. I know this isn't always the case, but I think its more common than not. Did YOU get flu-like symptoms? If so, then my best guess would be that you caught it from your boyfriend. He may have had it for years and has either been symptom-free or may not have known what it was and not seen a doctor at the time, therefore he could have passed it on to you without really being aware. Or he may have had sex with someone recently. The thing is, people LIE. I know that sounds harsh, but they do when they are backed into a corner. Most men will NOT admit, "Yeah, I did cheat, and that is probably how you got this life-long virus." You guys are in a long distance relationship? How long does he have to go without having sex? weeks or months? If the opportunity arrises, most men will cheat. I'm sorry, but I'm 43 years old and I've seen a lot in my years, and this is what I believe to be true. But you just need to ask yourself, if you can't prove that...what are you going to do? I mean, you really can't prove it. But I just don't want you to go forward by being naive to it.
My purpose of sharing with you is NOT to get you to break up with or hate your boyfriend. I just want to let you know that there IS life after this diagnosis. I'm living a very happy life, I have a loving husband and many children all who were born vaginally and have never caught HSV from me through birth. It's possible, and this is not the end of your world.
This is all just my opinion, of course. Not all will agree with me, and that's okay.
Thanks so much for sharing. I do feel like my life is over so its awesome to hear ur story. Im so confused now about having hsv1 since the outbreak was on my gential (genital) area. Could I have kissed some one and then it put it virus in my body and just had outbreak down there. Or did some one who was positive for hsv1 just perform oral sex on me and that's how I got it. Do they gave to have a cold sore to infect me or can then give oral and have no symptoms and pass on the virus. I do no remember ever kissing anyone with cold sore or going down on me. I been with my boyfriend over a yr goes never had a outbreak. Are ulsers on ur tongue considered HSV. I get them in summer from certain foods. I know my boyfriend has had one of them before. ?
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