My Boyfriend has Genital Herpes

[yello123]

My Boyfriend has Genital Herpes, we have had unprotected sex a couple of times but we did not knew he had it, he got tested of all STDs just in case.  

Our relationship has suffered a lot since we found out, we do not know what to do, we have been dating a couple of months but leaving him for that is just ridiculous.

Last night we had sex, he had his first outbreake more than a week ago and he is in medication.  the area he had his outbreake can be covered with a condom so we used a latex condom. After sex he told me to please clean the are with soap and water, so i did. Am i in risk?

[yello123]

Thanks for the information, i actually went to the doctor who is an expert told me the same thing! he is taking at this moment supressive theory and sex without a condom is not an option anymore.  I feel better knowing  this statistics.  

I tested myself before him and i am negative in every STD

Thanks so much for your answer

[petal130]

Indeed, "leaving him for that is just ridiculous" in my opinion. But, some people do, out of ignorance or just not being able to deal from the stigma associated with it. Yet, it's nothing but a pesky skin condition.

I'd highly advise becoming better educated. First, check out the herpes handbook and counseling video, here:  http://www.westoverheights.com/genital_herpes.html   Terri Warren's new book, "The Good News About the Bad News" is also an excellent resource for you both.

Does your BF take suppressive therapy? Have you been tested for herpes? Of the 1 in 4 women and 1 in 5 men who have it, 90% don't even know it!

Btw, it's the actual act of sex that transmits the virus; washing will do nothing but make you clean and fresh!

Here are the stats for male to female transmission rates:

MALE TO FEMALE TRANSMISSION RATES (HSV 2 ONLY STATS IS NOT APPLICABLE FOR HSV 1) If you have 100 couples where the male has HSV 2 but not the female (these figures are over a year) the odds of male to female transmission are if you do nothing (other than avoid sex when there is an outbreak) 8-10 females out of a 100 will get herpes in a year, or 8-10%. If you do go on a suppressive therapy then it drops to 4-5 females out of a 100 in a year or 4-5%, and if you use suppressive therapy and a condom the chances are 2-3 females out of a 100 will get herpes in one year, or 2-3%.

The Valtrex and transmission study stats are based on having sex 2 times/week.