Newly diagnosed with questions

[imblondie]

I have a few questions, but a little history first.  I have been married to my husband for 16 years and with him for over 20.  I believe that we have both been faithful to each other in that time.  Recently, I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with shingles in my genital area.  My doctor did take a swab telling me the only other thing she could think I might have was herpes.  Neither the doctor (whom I’ve seen for over 20 years) nor I thought anything about it; I even called my husband and said jokingly “Do you have anything to tell me?” It was all forgotten until several days later I received the news that the swab had come back positive for herpes.  I actually responded, “That’s impossible!”  After a lengthy conversation with my doctor, my husband and I have realized that he has had oral herpes for some time.  I never realized that cold sores were a form of herpes.  At 49, I feel kind of stupid for not realizing that before.  
So, now I’m dealing with the reality of herpes and have a lot of questions.  I found the Herpes Handbook and have read through it quickly, but still have some questions.  My doctor has told us that it really doesn’t matter which virus it is, 1 or 2; we have it now and we need to deal with it.  I’ve read that it is important to have a blood test and find out which it is, but I don’t know why it’s important.  Can anyone tell me?  Also, what is all the pain that I’m feeling and what is the best way to deal with it?  From the waist to my thighs I just hurt.  I guess the real question is how does this affect our sex life…physically and emotionally?  I’m not sure if anyone can answer the last one.

[gracefromHHP]

The herpes handbook is a free resource that I highly recommend. there is also a patient counseling video on the same site that is good. the link is in the read before posting post on this forum I believe as well as ifyou google it, it comes right up.

it'll take days for the gabapentin to reach a level where it's helpful :(  Not sure why you were given that for pain?

once you and hubby get tested to see who has what, it might help a little with the is it new or not. did they also test you for yeast and bacterial infections vaginally too?

[imblondie]

Thanks Grace.  I guess I should ask again about what type I have.  My Dr. just said that typing it was difficult, but it sounds like I'm getting the wrong information here.  She also said that you could get either one orally or genitally.

I took a weeks worth of Valtrex and she gave me a Rx for another round if I get another recurrence.

I can't take ibuprofen.  I have an Rx for Gabapentin that seems to help, but not as much as it could I guess.

I don't understand how this could just now be showing up.  My Dr. is convinced that this is my first occurrance, but how do we know that?  I've read that it's possible to have it and have mild occurrances and then a big one like I'm having.  Is that true?  Could I have had this for awhile?  I really do feel kind of dumb about all of this...like I should have known or something.

[gracefromHHP]

knowing what type you have is important. You can't make educated decisions as to what precautions to take until you know who has what. if they didn't type your culture as to hsv1 or hsv2 ( which is against cdc practice guidelines and wrong of your provider not to do - they are setting themselves up for malpractice suits by not following those guidelines as well as doing their patients a big disservice ), you'll need to follow up with more testing.  This very well could be hsv1 genitally since your husband has it orally but certainly ruling out hsv2 as a cause is also a good idea.  

are you on antivirals? if so which one, what dose and for how long?

Take plenty of ibuprofen unless you have a medical reason not to. it'll help with the aches. You can even alternate tylenol and ibuprofen for pain relief comparable to some narcotics - ie tylenol 1000mg at 6am, advil 600mg at 9am, tylenol at noon, advil at 3pm etc.  

Soaking in the bathtub with epsom salts thrown in or a packet of aveeno bath is also soothing. helps with the pain from the lesions as well as the rest of the body aches you sometimes get with a newly acquired infection.  

dermoplast spray ( the blue can for the genital area, not the red can ) is under $10 at most drugstores. It's a spray on anesthetic that is helpful with pain relief from the lesions.

how will this affect your sex life? Well if it's hsv1 genitally, not much at all. Recurrences will be few and far between most likely and he has it orally and is unlikely to contract it genitally.  It shouldn't disrupt your sex life very often at all.  Some couples do have issues dealing with something that was always there now being in the genital area but try not to let the "idea" of genital herpes be much of an issue - just not worth it.

keep asking questions!