Very worried.. not sure how much more I can take

Hello all
First off, I want to thank anyone who will take the time to answer this, and I know all that post are very worried and all that answer are not doctors and can only give advice.
I will try to be brief, I do shave down there and since Halloween, I will get a pimple after shaving, but recently the fact of that has been really bothering me, so I bought new more expensive razors and decided it was because I wasn't using shaving cream that was causing that, so this past time I used that , stopped using fabric softener, etc. Made alot of changes, this past week, I got 3 "pimple".. all in the pubic hair, one kind of right in the middle, I was able to pop it, it went away in a few weeks, the other 2 are the issue, I've been OBSESSING over this, looking ever chance I get.  They are on the right side, about an inch from the crease of my leg, the first one was only about the size of a pin head, it was painful, I aggrevated, popped it before it was ready, not to be gross , but kind of a 1/4" white "lace" of hard white stuff came out, went right away, but I still felt pain in that area, next morning grabbed the mirror, about 1/2" from that one was another one, this one only blood came out of.  I know it sounds bad, but Im freaking out, Ive put everything on it, I had bad skin and my dermotologist has retired, but I put everything I have on it and I know Ive aggrevated it, it hasn't spread to anything else, not oozing or scabbing, but it is still very sore. Ive made an appointment for tuesday. I asked the nurse if it's common for a first OB to show up only in that area.  She said it sounds like it could be an ingrown hair and to put neosporin on it and to come in sooner if it gets worse, but when I told her about the first one and then that one showing up next to it, she sounded more concerned.   I've been driving myself crazy reading everything I can find on the interent.  I feel like I have so many symptoms and am 100% certain I have this.  I have to also have a vulva biopsy on tuesday along with this exam to see if the VIN I was treated for in 2009 is back.  Just getting to be too much.  Anyone who has HSV, have you had non stop OBs for a few months?  This has been going on since Oct and just wondering.
Thank you again in advance.

[gracefromHHP]

going to be seen is the best course of action. could this be herpes? it could be but it sounds like pimples or ingrown hairs that you've picked at way too much.  don't shave again until this has been taken care of. keep it simple like soaking in epsom salts in the bathtub or warm soaks to the area.

grace

[sadone72]

Thank you Grace
Tuesday can't come soon enough, but I'm also so scared.  Any minute I get to myself I cry and look at it.
Can I ask you another question.  I honestly can't remember which test I had 2 years ago, but it was a blood test and at the time I had an oral cold sore, I had "issues" going on down there,  which turned out to be the VIN, but my first thought was herpes, didn't know I would have to go through surgery, but whatever. Anyways, I haven't had a facial OB of coldsores since Dec. of 2009.  In your pesonal experience and talking with people, and I do know I just have to wait and see until I find out what is going on.  Could it be because I was infected genitally? I've had HSV orally since I was a toddler I would say.  Back in 09 the HSV2 negative, HSV 1 obviously was positive and the culture (which I know isn't always accurate) but as I stated , turned out to be something else.
One last question, for today anyways, lol,  just trying to brace myself to Tuesday I guess.  Do initial OBs usually show up in the pubic area, or just depends person to person.

Thanks again

[gracefromHHP]

you having hsv1 orally means you aren't likely to contract hsv1 genitally. It can happen but it's likelihood of occurring is up there with you winning more than a free ticket or a $1 on the rub off lottery tickets.  

like I said, it sounds like it's something non-herpes going on.

[sadone72]

Thank you again Grace
I will wait and see what Tuesday brings. Luckily I have a great relationship with my GYN, and if it is something more than non-herpes going on, he's great at taking the time to sit with you and not rush you out the door.  Is it ok if I let you know how tuesday goes?  You're the only one repsonding, lol. I've noticed in most of the threads the people freaking out never wrote back after their doctor visits or whatever.
Have a great night, and just wanted to let you know it's great of you to take the time to be there for people when they are very scared.

[gracefromHHP]

we encourage folks to come back and let us know how their follow ups went!  several hundred people read this forum each day so lots of folks always waiting to hear "the rest of the story" :)  

[sadone72]

I will do so.
Again, I know I won't know for sure until tested.  But my gut tells me that it's more than a hair follicule. I looked at it alittle while ago cause it's hurting and the skin over it is turning white and if I press on it, it makes that whole area ache and part of my leg ache too, and the skin around it is still very red, painful and raised.  I wish I had a zanax or something to take before my appointment, LOL.

[sadone72]

Hi Grace
I had my appointment yesterday.  Since the lesion was already healing , he couldn't do a culture, so he ordered the bloodwork.  I didn't get a definite answer from him on what he thought, he said there's a chance it could be.. or couldn't be.  He said that I had no itching and that it wasn't the "worse pain I've experienced" was a good sign that it possibly might not be... do you agree? So now I wait the 7-10 days until the results.  

[Mistakeguy789]

Best thing is for us not to guess.  Wait for your lab results at this point.  We can guess all day but the lab work is going to be the one to answer.

[sadone72]

Yes, I called the dr. on friday and the results weren't in yet, but I started the Valtrex cause I've been having more symptoms, burning non stop and bumps around the anal area.  My doctor has been usually very supportive of me in the past, with the surgery he had to do and HPV problems Ive had, this time he gave me more of a lecture that I was blowing HSV test out of the water and making it out to be more than what it was and there was no real difference between HSV 1 and 2, because I told him I tested positive for HSV 1 back in 2009.  I think I was more depressed when I got off the phone with him :(
He said if my symptoms got better in the next few days then I should know for sure then that's what it was.
Valtrex question?  Has anyone else (sorry in advance!) experienced horrible gas and stomach problems?

[gracefromHHP]

yes those can be a side effect.

did they also test you for yeast and bacterial infections vaginally? this doesn't sound like herpes causing your current symptoms.

[sadone72]

Hi Grace
No, my Dr. who usually treats you like a "friend" and gives you time, treated me totally different last week. When I got undressed, the nurse came in to take my BP, then didn't because the Dr. came in, then he seemed annoyed with me.  I don't know if it's cause there's a chance I might have contracted an STD so he's acting that way, but he maybe gave me 10 minutes, when usually I'm there a good 45 minutes, this is after I waited 3 hours almost in the waiting room to be seen, and I told him she never took my BP, then she never did and kind of rushed me out. If this was my first time going there, it would have been my last.  I'm sure anyone reading this, you nervous when you suspect something going on and to be rushed out doesn't help matters.  
When I called and told him about the anal burning and bumps, he said it sounds like thats what was going on.. and I told him I had some sores around the base of my spine and it felt like the base of my spine was on fire. He kind of made me feel like it was all in my head.  Not sure if all the reading I saturated my brain with the last week if playing tricks on me, but what I felt was real.  
And I wonder if you agree, he told me in women with genital HSV, he hardly ever sees it show up on their actual "genitals", it's always in surrounding areas.
My results should be in today.  Its been a week.  I can't sleep tonight because of it.  But I will know for sure.  I do have an appointment with a dermatologist coming up in a few months because I suffer from acne as it, and had talked to him about it before , because Ive had to had 2 ingrown hairs lanced down there that got infected, so something is going on, I'll know the answers soon enough.
Wish me luck

[gracefromHHP]

have you called yet to see what your herpes blood test results are?  

you can have genital herpes symptoms anywhere in the entire boxer short area as we call it.  they can, and will, show up anywhere there.  

did you get your biopsy results back yet?  

[sadone72]

Hi,
I finally heard back on thursday from his assistant cause he was off.  He ordered the wrong test! She said herpes 6, which is the childhood one??    I had him , my dr, call me last night, which he did.  He doesn't understand how the test got screwed up, they only tested for hsv 1 which doesnt' show any new infecion (infection), I know I've had that since I was little.  I told him the small bumps are still around the anal area, but not so much the burning, he had me on Valtrex for 5 days, twice a day, I ended it on thursday and all that changed that was cut down on the burning, so he said "maybe" that's not whats going on in that area and ordered another blood test.  I've been sick, left work early and didn't go back to the lab.  I'm just so exhausted over this, been stressing and then more stressing for the week to hear back only to hear that the wrong test was done!
I asked if I should start another round of the Valtrex seeing the bumps are still there, he said it was too soon to start that back up.  I had already did what he suggested, bought some of those wipes for after you go.
Can I ask you a question Grace, have you ever had a break out in the anal area?

[gracefromHHP]

I've had ob's almost everywhere in the boxer short area ( everywhere but my thighs ).

it's unfortunate that they ordered the wrong test on you :(  make sure they credit you for that test or don't charge you for the repeat testing!  

herpes doesn't typically present with small bumps around the anal area - usually it's an ulcerated area that has pain and/or itching to it.  


tucks wipes are really helpful no matter if this is herpes or something else. Use them as a compress for 10 minutes. walking around like a duck with them held in between your butt cheeks is good for entertainment too ( unless your bum is a lot tighter than mine and it's not such an effort to hold a compress there for 10 minutes...he he he ).

[sadone72]

HI again,
I'm sorry to be such a pain about this, I've just realized that this is almost a month now that Ive had something non-stop.  
Sorry if I sound dumb, but what exactly is an "ulcerated area"..  cause this is the steps that it took. HORRIBLE burning for almost 12 hours.  Then I felt what felt to me like tiny bumps/blisters, which in my opinion, didn't hurt , but burned when I touched them.  5 days on Valtrex, they seemed to bleed alittle bit.. but then felt like holes or little cuts, but after the Valtrex , not too much burning or anything.  I've been using the wipes to keep it clean. I know I'm not spelling it right it, but it was around the whole opening and "perianal" area.
Which I just wanted to add, I'm feeling was an outbreak cause I felt tiny sores on the base of my spine that burned when the shower hit it for 2 days and then the day after I started the Valtrex my how lower back burned.  This was about 2-3 weeks after I first had that "pimple" down there too.. was wondering about second outbreaks if that was my first.  I was REALLY hoping I would have my bloodwork back and could end the guessing.

I know it's not the end of the world and people go through so much worse.  I've really pushed everyone away the last couple of weeks because of this, just want to sit in my room and cry.  Havent' even said anything to one that I know gave it to me, just have been giving him excuses on why I can't see him.   Now I have to wait longer because of the screw up at the lab :(

[gracefromHHP]

ulcerated skin is open skin areas.

really not too much I can add at this point since it's been too many days for a lesion culture plus you were on valtrex.  

how long ago was your last sex prior to all of this?  

best thing to do is to be seen again monday and get another exam to try to see what is going on.

[gracefromHHP]

also I recommend talking to the partner you had prior to these symptoms so they can seek out hsv2 testing themselves to see what their status is.

[sadone72]

Ok, I think I understand.  My "perianal" area, not sure If I'm spelling that right, was where it was all burning and then felt like bumps, now it feels like cuts and just not "right".

Do you think in your opinion being on the Valtrex is going to some how change my bloodwork when I go tomorow.  I'm going to Quest, not another exam, just can't afford it, all thest copays are killing me.

The actual date I had sex was Feb. 1st.  

I appreciate you taking the time to keep answering me.   I really am TRYING to get my results here! lol  The guy I was with, and I know you are going to say I have to tell him. I cant for a number of reasons.  Before all this started he had some how caught mollescum (spelling) and totally blammed me. Which I didn't have, went to the dr.  And now I'm wondering if wherever he picked that up, he caught that to.  I know it doesn't matter, but the day we had sex, it litterally lasted maybe a  minute, lol, sorry, trying to keep my sense of humor in this.  And I had been hoping to have my bloodwork back last week to say something to him, and then there was the screw up, and now it's a month later.   When he caught that other stuff, he said he hadn't been seeing anyone else, but he had to have been to catch that.
I just wish I could wake up from this nightmare.
I will try to keep quiet until I get my blood work back :-)

[gracefromHHP]

it's way too early for herpes blood testing. don't even waste your money on it.

[sadone72]

So then what do I do?  Just assume that I am positive now?

[Mistakeguy789]

never assume anything.  

Right now you need to wait until the right time to get tested.  Your issues didn't sound like herpes before.  Continue to follow up with your doctor.  Avoid sexual encounters until your skin has fully healed.

Talking to your partner and having him be tested is going to answer a lot of questions.  

[gracefromHHP]

wait until at least 3 months post encounter and get herpes igg blood testing done then.

anytime you have symptoms genitally before then, be seen promptly for an exam and ask them to do lesion cultures and typing if they suspect that they look like herpes.

[sadone72]

Thanks for your replys.
Just an update.  I'm going to be seen again on Monday.  Everything that was going on before is going on again.  Almost started the same day of the week as before. The burning, etc.  
Just a question to know what to expect, and I know that nothing can be diagnosed online, It's been feeling like "bubbles" I guess you can say in my rectum opening, I've used prep-H, started the Valtrex again and it has helped, but my question is, will the dr be able visually diagnose is these have been outbreaks that have been going on for the past 2 weeks?  I can't see there unfortunately, (maybe it is fortunate or else I would stress more), all I can do is feel what feel like cuts/sores were there were "bubble" a few days ago, and just still some slight burning, but no real pain or itching at all.
I did go for a blood test anyways this past tuesday cause thinking back I've brushed off pimples in the hair area thinking it was from shaving, always thinking it wouldn't show up there.
I'm sure by this point you guys are rolling your eyes at me lol

[Mistakeguy789]

Chances are this may not be herpes.  But visual diagnosis is always harder the further out things go.  A culture is going to be best at this point.  

[sadone72]

Hi To Mistakeguy789 and Grace
Thanks for putting up with me the past month.
Doctors visit went really well.  Test came back negative. He gave me a very thorough exam to check for everything, said I did have alot of scar tissue from my previous surgeries (which could explain the bumps I've been feeling and haven't paid attention till I started obsessing over this) and my anal area he said showed no signs of anything that needed to be biospsied or cultured.  No evidence of an outbreak or a recent outbreak.  He said it looks like Hemmeroids and some irriation/fissures and I a small patch of white skin, which he's thinking is scar tissue from the surgery (I had to have alot of that area removed due to cancerous cells).   I showed him where the two pimples were 3 weeks ago when I went in and that they were still "hard" under the skin, he said if that were herpes they would be long gone by now, sounds more like an infected hair folicle.  He was very nice and understand, he worded it as such, with the people in Japan now, the minute they hear a crack of thunder, they are going to fear the worse.. that another earth quake is coming, you had this horrible thing, we cut cancer out of your body and the minute you feel something is wrong, you think it's back.. you do have reason to worry. And then he smiled andput his hand on my should and said when I start really worrying, stay off the internet looking up stuff cause it is just going to make you worry more.  LOL  Which is TRUE.  But I still have to go back in a few months cause even though they removed most of my cervix in 09, they didn't get all of the cancer and my pap is still abnormal, so right now we're just watching it every 6 months, hasn't gotten worse or better.
But again, I wanted to thank the two of you for listening and offfering advice.    I thought back and both weeks it happend, I had spicy pizza, so even my best friend said maybe I'm allergic to tomatos, or the sauce, didn't eat it this week, and so far so good :-)
If it's ok, maybe I will stop in now and then and say hello.
Hope you had a great weekend with your son Grace.

[Mistakeguy789]

Thanks for the follow up.  Glad we were able to help.  Good luck in the future.

[gracefromHHP]

sounds like you have a terrific provider who is on top of things for you :)

spring break goes way too fast but we had a lot of fun together :)

[sadone72]

Hi there
Yes, you both were a big help.  I am thankful for my doctor, who even though, you never go there without waiting 4 hours in the waiting room to be seen, it's cause he does take time with each patient.  
This past week though, I don't know what it is, I'm still stressing over this, my best friend is just about had it with me, she's like THE TEST WAS NEGATIVE.  Not sure if it's cause I read so much about it up, because I thought once I got the results my symptoms would go away.  
Not really looking for an answer, just needed to vent alittle bit I guess.  
Partly I think it's in my head on waiting for the 3 month mark to re-test again.  I did the math in my head and the person I was with, besides this past time, the time before that was the week right after thanksgiving, so that would just be about 3 months, and I know for a fact he wasn't with anyone else during that time.  
Like I said, not really looking for answers, and I've looked over and over the posts and it seems like once someone finds out their tests were negative, you don't hear back, just wondering.. actually.. lol.. I kinda know, how I'm feeing is NOT normal.  
Plus I came down with bronchitis over the weekend, very sick, was in the ER sunday morning, so I'm wondering maybe cause I'm not feeling well this is just wrecking with all my emotions.  I really just dont know

[gracefromHHP]

hope you are feeling better soon :)  still lots of respiratory and flu germs out there making folks sick :(  

[sadone72]

Thank you Grace
Have you ever heard back from people becoming this "crazy" I guess you can say is a good word to use?  I know partially, I need to stop reading so much and accept my negative results, which kind of sounds like a ridiculous thing when I even say it to myself lol

[gracefromHHP]

yes we do hear back from many of the folks who post to us about their "adventures" with herpes testing. I'd estimate that only about 10% of them end up having herpes.  Sometimes our bodies just like to annoy the heck out of us!  I'm really not thrilled with this whole perimenopause thing myself in general!  

[sadone72]

Hi Grace
I guess I still dont feel great cause I'm still not "great" down there! lol    Been so long since I felt normal. :(   I'm 38, maybe this is pre-menopause for me???

[gracefromHHP]

the hormone changes make us more vulnerable to vaginitis in general as well as vaginal dryness start to become an issue which leads to more issues in general too.

[sadone72]

Hi Grace
I was hoping I would be done with this, but need your advice once again.  Was back at the doctor on saturday.  I had "stumbled" upon a pimple on my butt, he said thats all it was, said if it was a herpes outbreak, I wouldn't have just stumbled upon it, I would have been feeling it before and have been like "WHAT is going on back there"... he looked me over again, said nothing looked abnormal, said maybe the "Cut" feelings I was having is from nerve damage I had from my surgeries.  That night I went on a date I probably shouldn't have, drinking was involved, don't want to get into the details, but I had to take the "morning after pill" because of what happened.  Felt like total crap the first two days.  Now Im noticing in my hair area (again.. where this whole email first started, lol)  that I had a small painful bump on tuesday, some solid white stuff came out, then fluid.  Ok, figured maybe an ingrown hair cause I shaved alittle over a week ago for the first time. But then last night, I started feeling feverish, right leg kinda achy and that side of my vagina was sore to the touch, grabbed the mirror when I got home and I could feel what felt like another little bump closer to the leg , had to really seach it out, almost 1/2 the size of an eraser head.  Looked like it had alittle black head either in it,next to it, hard to tell , holding a flashlight in one hand and mirror in the other.  But this one I would say almost looks like a blister which scars me.  I squeezed the skin and got the black head out the the "blister" is still there, not changing, looks flat, not quite bubbled.  And my vagina looks alittle raw (not sure if it's what happened over the weekend)...  I feel like I can't call my doctor AGAIN, I was just there saturday, this will be the 5th time going to see him this year over this, he's going to think Im insane over this.    

[gracefromHHP]

why not buy a "hysterical female" tee shirt to start wearing when you go to be seen? he he he  

sometimes it does seem like you might as well buy your own chair to have with your name on it in the waiting room. I had to go monthly to my gyn for over a year once. We joked he'd be able to recognize my nether regions in a line up...lol.  I'd give it until monday and if things aren't better, go and be seen and get a proper exam and testing for yeast and bacterial infections. that gives you the weekend to give your genitals a little extra tlc to see if this is just all irritation from last weekend.  if it feels like a herpes recurrence, take a round of antivirals to cover that too.

it's so much fun being female sometimes isn't it?

[sadone72]

I bet that's what my name comes up as when I call there.  lol   And I'm sure my doctor knows my privates better than his own wife's by now.  
That's just it, he's been telling me nothing is making him look like Im having an outbreak down there.  And the testing was all negative.  He said the nerve feeling Im probably feeling is from being cut twice due to the surgeries.   I did take anti-virals for 5 days this past week when I stumbled upon that pimple upon my butt last week.  He's never tested me for yeast or bacterial infections.  To be honest, you are the only one who has mentioned that to me.  I think (well that, and because Im feeling like a nutcase lately) lol, that's why I ask you for your advice.    
I did alittle more examing last night, and in the past year, Ive had to have 2 cyst in the hair area lanced, and I looked and I still have a bump left over from both of them and I think that is what the "newer" bump i thought was, cause it hasn't changed in 2 days.  
I'm thinking maybe it's time to buy a chastity belt, lock it up for a year and unplug the computer ! lol

[gracefromHHP]

yeah it does get totally annoying to have to keep going back over and over again. I can tell you from my own experience that herpes lesions on the buttocks were never something I'd confuse as a pimple for long.  They were itchy like a mosquito bite initially and then looked like a zit gone bad after a day or two and they stuck around forever to annoy the heck out of me. hard to walk around itching your bum in public and then making faces because after the first scratch it started to hurt.  

maybe try some soaks in the tubby with epsom salts thrown in this weekend and a glass of wine ( for medicinal purposes of course )? I think they work better when used together ;)

[sadone72]

It does get frusting cause , again, feels like they don't listen.  If it's not herpes.   Then something is going on and I'm tired of hearing if it's still bothering you in a month.. in a month.. it's been almost 3 months now.  I even asked him (my doctor) about doing an anal pap.  I feel like I'm doing all the work, told him I had the VIN, CIN, she (my oncologist) already removed skin around my anus for precancer, could this be AIN?  I brought up to him that he said he saw a patch of white skin in my anal opening (sorry to be graphic, just at whits ends here) which was how my VIN progressed from stages, could this be starting back there and I can't see it.  And I'm getting the same thing the last doctor said, just leave it alone, until months went by and I finally begged him to biopsy it and then by that time it had progressed to far and had to go to an oncologist and had to have surgery.  So i guess all my questions, seeing my blood tests and there hasn't been anything he's seen to culture for a herpes culture is if ALL of these symptoms are sounding like herpes symptoms and I should just deal with thinking I'm having weekly herpes outbreaks or move onto another doctor (again).    
The "pimple" I had on my butt didn't itch.  I was falling asleep one night and (lol) just happened to rub my hand over my butt and felt something pop in my hand and then noticed alittle hole, the doctor looked at it and said it was just a rement or something from an old pimple.
I wish I did like wine, or something stronger for that matter .. but it gives me migraines.

[Mistakeguy789]

You know really the big thing is you need to find a doctor who deals maybe with the skin issues.  I am not sure if you are seeing a dermatologist but you should look into that.  Matters of the skin is there speciality and maybe something they can tell you whats going on.  

[sadone72]

Thank you Mistakeguy,
I was seeing a great dermatologist.  Ive always had rosacea, acne, he was going to start me on acutane, and he retired right before Christmas, so he couldn't because you have to have monthly pregnancy tests.   I have an appointment coming up next month finally with a new doctor taking his place (took 4 months to get) but I didn't know if they can look "down there".   Obviously, your a man, lol, so Im not sure if you know this, but even with my male gyno, before he examines you, a female nurse has to be in the room with you to protect himself and the patient, so I don't know how that works with dermotologist.  I'll try anything at this point.  Thanks for the advice :-)

[gracefromHHP]

yes they can check out your girlie parts too :)   anytime any male medical professional looks at your genital area, they have to have a female in the room with them. it's for you protection and theirs. too easy for folks to accuse a male doctor of impropriety so they always have another woman there to observe.

I had to work with a dermatologist for issues in my genital area and it was really helpful.  

keep us posted :)

[sadone72]

Thanks again you two.
I'm just hoping the first visit with this new dermo isn't just a consulation, you know how long it takes to get in with them... I have no idea why it is like that.  I want to get to the bottom of, well my bottom!  

[bonbon30]

Sounds like a staff infection maybe. I have scars left over from that.