dating a girl with genital herpes

i recently started dating a girl about a month ago. after a few dates i received oral sex without a condom (i am a male) twice during the evening. she has not had any outbreaks in a few years and she never has outbreaks on her mouth, is there a chance that it could have been spread to me? also if we used protection, is it fairly safe to have vaginal intercourse? thanks

[auntiejessi]

It depends.  

There are 2 types of herpes - type 1 and 2.  Type one infects the mouth and genitals, and type 2 almost always infects the genitals.

If she has type 1 genitally, there is a decent chance she also has it orally, even if she has no symptoms.  If she does, then you could get genital herpes from her oral herpes via oral sex.

If she has type 2, you won't get it from receiving oral sex.  There is a very slight chance that you'd get it orally, but its not a big enough risk to worry about.  You could also be hit by a bus tomorrow.  I would just avoid giving oral sex if she has an outbreak.

So now what?  You need to find out what type she has.  Just knowing that its "genital" is incomplete info, and she might not even know herself.  You both should get type specific IgG blood tests.

At best, there is about a 2% chance per year that you could get it from her if you use condoms or if she takes a medication like valtrex every day.  If all you did was avoid sexual contact when she had symptoms, its a 4% chance that you'd get it per year.

Aj