false negatives

[cor1947]

I had a 17 month intimate relationship with a man who tested positive for herpes but doesn't remember ever having an outbreak except for one lesion 20+ years ago that he thought was from friction.  He was surprised to find he tested positive.  He contacted previous partners from during the previous 20 years with whom he had been intimate for months or years at a time.  All tested negative.  I also tested negative at the beginning of our relationship.  I decided the risk was low and ceased using condoms a few months into the relationship.  After we split up, I received oral sex from a partner who broke out with an oral cold sore within 72 hours.  I went and got tested again and came back negative.  My questions are as follows:
How often do herpes tests produce false negatives?
How soon should I have another test to see if it still comes back negative?
How many false negatives in a row can be counted on to be for sure negative?
How likely is it that the cold sore that occurred on my partner could be from me being a herpes carrier if my tests are negative?
If I'm consistently testing negative, what do I need to tell future partners to be fair to them?
Thank you VERY much. cor

[pebbles7083]

this is horrible first of all. Im sorry you have to deal with this. your results are negative! Why don't you believe that? But who ever gave you oral sex, I would suspect them of having hsv1 atleast. I think you should wait 3 mos to retest the igg blood test and take this test as the final result. I think as of right now take the precautions (condoms) even though that's not a 100% guarantee it's better than nothing. I think in order to be fair to your partners you should let them know that your test came back negative, and you're going to go back and test again to make sure b/c the person who ate you out developed a cold sore , so you're not sure about that. I think that's being fair. And most likely the person will still sleep with you, but atleast they'll be aware what they are getting themselves into.

[gracefromHHP]

Do you know if the partner with the cold sore went for any testing at that time?  Just because it's the first time they might've noticed a cold sore, doesn't mean it was a newly acquired infection for them.

At this point, you are testing negative for herpes. As long as your last test was 4 months after the last time you had had sex with your hsv2+ partner, no reason to doubt them. No reason to explain your results either to future partners except for to say that you've been tested for herpes after your last partner and it was negative.

grace