This forum is an un-mediated, patient-to-patient forum for questions and support regarding herpes issues such as: Herpes symptoms and treatments, causes, diagnosis, and herpes in men, tests, telling your spouse or partner.
Just came across this old, really good post and thought I would share it,
on how really safe handjobs and massage can be.
Yet Another Hand Job Question
by OCDMAN, Jun 20, 2006 12:00
In 30+ years working in a busy STD clinic (15,000 patient visits per year), I have never seen a case of any infection that was plausibly acquired by hand to genital contact. It simply does not happen, period.
Some sites undoubtedly say hand-to-genital contact can spread STDs because "common sense" supports the idea, or because individual persons claim to have been infected that way. Such testimonials are the least reliable of all possible evidence and must be disregarded in virtually every case, no matter how strongly they are stated. Proper sites demand evidence beyond common sense and individual claims. There is no such evidence for hand-to-genital STD transmission. And other sites, as you suggest, take the position that if any theoretical risk exists, people should be informed of it. That's like saying there is a theoretical risk of being hit by a meteorite, which is true, but not distinguishing that risk from that of not wearing seatbelts.
Man, this is so confusing. Just about every site I've been on said that Herpes can be spread by skin to skin contact, even without any sex involved. This is so confusing. Does it ? Or does it not ? Screw it, I'm never having any sexual contact ever again. I don't need all the headache.
But let's say he masturbates you and then he uses the same hand for a handjob, can he still get herpes? I know skin on skin contact could spread herpes. But I also know that doctors always say to wash your hands because you could spread the virus elsewhere for instance in your eye.
So how right is that theory?
This post was in reference to hand to genital contact - not direct skin on skin contact as we talk about transmitting genital herpes and hpv thru. Hand to genital contact is otherwise known as mutual masturbation. Even if you "wet" your hand a little on yourself and then masturbate your partner with it - it's very unlikely to transmit the virus. It's more so the heat and friction of sex ( and naked foreplay ) that is an issue, not the vaginal fluids/semen ). Now if you have an active herpes whitlow infection on your hand then you shouldn't be touching your partner's genitals until it's healed but not many people have that either.
When we talk about skin to skin contact we talk about having your clothes off and all the humping and rubbing and simulated sex type action that goes on with foreplay. That's why it's recommended that when the clothes come off, the condom goes on. It's been shown in studies to reduce transmission of std's better that way. Most of us I think wait until actual penetration to put on the condom and that leaves room for some std's to be transmitted during foreplay.
Does that make more sense?
Also no reason to abstain from sex - just you and your partners get tested before being intimate so you know who has what for the most part ( you can' t test for hpv or molluscum ).
I agree with grace. But add one item. A condom is most effective during intercourse. Rubbing bodies together (perhaps vigorously) may transmit the virus to thighs, buttocks, etc. But this is extremley rare,.. although the Doctors do cite some occurences.
As far as most herpes sites citing touching as a way to get herpes. They are strictly speaking hypothetically and cannot back it up with evidence.
Hey guys. Just wanted to give you some solid, grounded advice from a first handsome experience, not some rubbish people have read.
If you both are naked, and you have sex, even with or without a condom, you could get herpes, this is because your pubic area, or your balls, to be blunt, will be rubbing onto the female, vice versa and this could cause a transmission. NOTE I said 'could'.
Most of the time the herpes virus will die as soon as it leaves the skin, this could be via towels, HANDS, toilet seats ect. This is because the virus itself is embedded in the areas of the skin which are moist hence the reason it only really takes form in the mouth, anus, vagina or moist areas of the penis and therefore can't survive elsewhere, so if you touch an OPEN HERPES WOUND and then touch yourself it's not likely to transmit however being a clean freak myself I would wash my hands anyway just to be safe and be clean.
There is obviously the possibility of transmitting the virus without open herpes wounds due to viral shedding, this can occur when there is no visible herpes virus, but the virus itself begins to shed (which you can't see) and this could obviously transfer via skin to skin rubbing. However, in my six or so years of being a fellow 'herpster' I have never experienced anything like this before.
I also thought I'd raise that females are TWICE AS LIKELY to get herpes than a male. So even if a male does get himself into a predicament, he is twice less likely to get the virus and a lot of you may actually already have it but suffer no side effects as a lot of people don't.
Something like 80% of sexually active people have herpes, even cold sores in the winter, that is a form of herpes.
So just to reiterate. Skin to skin contact means rubbing a moist area of your body such as mouth, anus, vagina or penis with an infected area.
I hope this helps. It's nothing to worry about as long as your safe and careful. And even if you're unfortunate, it's not the end of the world. It cant make you infertile or affect you in anyway!
You're saying when people say "skin to skin" contact they mean dry humping? Not handjobs? This information goes for HPV as well? I'm sorry for all the questions, but I've been paranoid for months because I'm a virgin but I have my fiancé a handjob and can't recall if I washed my hands before going to the rest room... I've worried myself sick.
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