help me figure this out

I am a wife of 23 years.  I developed a vaginal sore about 10 days ago and the doctor took a swab and diagnosed me with Herpes Type 2. My husband and I both insist that we have not had any other sex partners during our entire marriage.  I had a vaginal sore once about 25 years ago and at that time, the doctor told me he thought it was herpes.  I never got tested and never experienced any symptoms or outbreaks since then.  My husband says he had a sore on his penis once a short time before we met (26-28 years ago) and he just assumed it was a friction (too much sex) sore and it just went away.  He also has never experienced any symptoms or outbreaks since then.  We have had many discussions in the past few days and are perplexed by this diagnosis.  Could one of us had herpes all along with no symptoms for 23 years?  One of the forums suggested we get tested but what will that tell us that we don't already know.  What would be the point to that since I already know I have Herpes 2?  What should we do?  

[Terri Warren, RN, Adult Nurse Practitioner]

Yes, either or both of you could have had herpes for 25 years or more and didn't know it.  Both of you have histories that are very suspicious for genital herpes infection.  I don't know how old you are, but in the US, about 36% of women in their forties have HSV 2, so its quite common.  There really is no point in testing you, but your husband might want to know if he is infected or not.  I don't know anything about your marriage, but in this situation, some men won't care about getting infected and others will, its quite individual.

The important thing to keep in mind here is that there never had to be a third party involved during your marriage for you to come up with this.  It doesn't sound like you are blaming him or him, you, which is really good.

Please ask me more questions as you think of them.

Terri