herpes from mutual masturbation

Hi Grace i'm Jake and im 25 and really nervous. I had an encounter with mutual masturbation where someone i didnt know from gym [but know he's been around by what he was saying] licked/sucked my balls but not my shaft [i didn't do any oral at all] and we briefly jacked each other in a stall. I ejaculated into my hand but the other guy didnt come on me although there was precum on his hand and i think it got on my penis when i was stroking it. Im really scared about having caught herpes or hpv from this and it was my first time doing this since high school- I'm not promiscuous this was unusual. I got tested about a week later for stds at a clinic and was clean but now I'm worried that was too soon. Also my penis head has tiny bumps on it and sometimes they sting for a second/penis twitches sometimes and I've had some flu symptoms and achy balls now and then since that happened almost four months ago[haven't had sex since of any kind xcept jerking off and even that isn't as often as it used to be but sometimes I have to or I feel like I'll go crazy]. I haven't had big sores or breakouts like pictures I've seen and nothing on the shaft but have had serious depression since it happened and am afraid I ruined my life/chances of being with anyone and I'm just getting going with things. Also I shave my balls and the area clean and I've read now on internet that can make it very easy to catch stds on them? I didn't know that until after all this happened and thought this was safe sex. Please help me im scared to the point of being on the edge.What do you think about this I can't tell anyone!! Thank you so much for all you do here for everyone.

[gracefromHHP]

this is not a risk for std's for you.

whatever is going on, isn't related to this encounter.

grace

[caljake]

Wow Grace thank you soo very much for getting back to me this quick. Is this not a good way to have had got stds on me? Nothing seems the same after this happened and my sexual life I have all but given up. I had an almost encounter a month ago but I had to say no because I was afraid to spread something and I would never do that. I moved away from where I lived at that time so I don't know his std status or even how to contact the guy i had the previous mutual experience with now. I'm going to the dr.[urologist] to get my balls checked today because I've had a lump in one. Could I have gotten a disease from him sucking on them and now there's an infection? Should I get tested again?  

[petal130]

Grace already stated this wasn't an STD risk. Work with your urologist as to the lump in your testicle.

[caljake]

Hi Grace, I saw the urologist and it turns out I have spermatic cysts that are not cancerous at this point and I asked the dr. to look at my penis both soft and hard to see what he thought of the bumps I have since they are more noticeable when I'm erect.I have had some discomfort around my butthole too which I didn't have before and i don't do anal but i read that herpes can be in that area even if that's not where the infection started. I asked if he thought it was hsv or hpv and he didn't think so and said it looked 'normal' after looking at the area briefly but as I said before I never had them before that encounter at my gym k after the gym m/m I had a flu and then the bumps appeared. I wanted to know what you and hadn't been with anyone in months before that. Also even though I tested clean a weethought of this? Any advice you might have would be appreciated because I'm having a hard time understanding where the bumps[sting sometimes/never open or ooze anything out and never go away..does herpes do that??] came from and whether I can still have sex or even m/m without spreading something. Thanks, I just want to put this behind me.

[gracefromHHP]

really no reason to think herpes as a cause. see your regular provider if the anal irritation continues.

[caljake]

Sorry for the typos!!! s/b *Also even though I tested clean a week after that and hadn't been w/anyone in months before that what you thought of this?*  

[caljake]

Thank you Grace, I've been feeling pretty bad about it all and since I know only what I've seen online about herpes I don't really understand it well but it seemed to fit some of my symptoms.. Pretty scary and not something I thought I'd ever deal with since I'm careful and the m/m seemed ok. If I were to do it again is it still a safe way to have a sexual experience with someone just jerking off or even sucking balls? I would do a condom w/oral to penis if that happened but prefer not to outside a relationship which I hope to have! Hope things are going well for you. Thanks.

[caljake]

Anyone here have this situation happen and similar symptoms?? What was the diagnosis or did you get something from m/m?

[caljake]

hi grace,i wanted to ask you if you thought i could have gotten something fungal from my posted encounter.? the bumps seem a little better but haven't gone away yet. still some discomfort goin on on my penis..would a bacterial or fungal infection or issue show up on lab results? i had cbc and several others at dr.'s office and they were all ok. if it could be fungal would it make small bumps and a pain on penis head and under head now and then? can u get hpv from what i did?? I want to be with someone i met but im afraid i can give something to them. thanks x a million. this forum has made me want to be so much more aware of things out there!!!!!!!!!!!

[gracefromHHP]

no, skin infections don't show up on the testing you had done.

if your symptoms aren't better yet, return monday to be seen for a further work up to try to figure out what is going on.

[caljake]

Thanks for your response Grace..if I have learned anything from you besides your knowledge on the topics here its that you seem to be a hell of a nice person w/a great attitude. Thanks for that and bless you. I guess maybe another dr. visit [ugh] and possibly a dermatologist is in my future. I will keep u up on my journey back to normal or at least my version of normal haha. Do you think I need further std testing before I get with someone I was involved with last year or am I ok to have oral/touch/make out naked with them??

[gracefromHHP]

it does get annoying to have to keep going back to be seen but it's the best thing to do to get answers so you can treat what is going on and be rid of it :)

no reason for more testing before you get involved with someone new. just remember to talk about std's and testing with them before sex/oral sex.

[caljake]

Thanks again Grace u have been a great help and u r in my prayers. I pray alot and although i don't get many answers it makes me feel unalone in the world.I 'm not sure what's going on w/my genital areas but there's definitely something happening. Idk if the herpes is responsible or if i even have it but it feels like hpv/warts are possible since the little bumps on penis head and small discoloration on rim of head don't go away and i think i feel them around my butthole/not sure but it tingles somewhat there and feels like its warm?? Hopefully i can get some answers from another dr visit. Its hard for me to deal w/the fact that touching/jacking someones penis and having my balls licked for a minute or two has produced this hell i've been going thru since april. Since i've never had symptoms of any kind before this and tested negative [1 week after so can't be from before this] for all std's xcept syphillis (syphilis) [which i didn't test for at all] i know whatever is happening is from the gym guy incident.. Lasted all of about 5 min! I will never again do anything casually as far as sex is concerned. I have had horrible days thinking of why this happened to me and at least when i get here i feel less separate from other ppl and that i'm again, not alone. I'm optimistic but trying to stay realistic as well. Thanks again for your ear. Jake

[caljake]

Hey Grace i was wondering what u mite know about hpv/hsv transmission orally?? By that i mean together at the same time if the other person has both. I have no idea if they did but its on my mind that one or both is causing my probs on penis and butt area. Feels like little bumps around hole but not sure if its hair follicles or what. Goin to new dr. nxt week to get looked at and try to xplain the symptoms i still have. Not sure but i think the head of my penis where the bumps started is getting a little better? Idk. Also the small [1 inch] area around head that has a red veiny discoloration is still there and stings less frequently but sometimes. Also is it consistent w/hpv or hsv 1/2 to have warm/almost very warm feeling around anus? Does a bacterial infection do that?? I'm still trying to find my way here and understand all the std stuff. Very thankful for the forums here they have helped me alot in this. Jake

[caljake]

Hey Grace i was wondering what u mite know about hpv/hsv transmission orally?? By that i mean together at the same time if the other person has both. I have no idea if they did but its on my mind that one or both is causing my probs on penis and butt area. Feels like little bumps around hole but not sure if its hair follicles or what. Goin to new dr. nxt week to get looked at and try to xplain the symptoms i still have. Not sure but i think the head of my penis where the bumps started is getting a little better? Idk. Also the small [1 inch] area around head that has a red veiny discoloration is still there and stings less frequently but sometimes. Also is it consistent w/hpv or hsv 1/2 to have warm/almost very warm feeling around anus? Does a bacterial infection do that?? I'm still trying to find my way here and understand all the std stuff. Very thankful for the forums here they have helped me alot in this. Jake

[Mistakeguy789]

HPV orally is rare.  Oral sex is a LOW RISK for all STD's.  Its not the best way for you to get an STD.  Be seen by your provider.  But at this point it could be anything.  You could have hemmorids.

[caljake]

Hey man thanks for the advice. I guess its poss to have hemroids but idk?? Doesn't xplain my probs w/penis though and those started first. Going to diff dr. this week to hopefully get some answers. The hpv worries me less than hsv1 which i think from reading everything here is what i would get from oral if anything?? Is that right? Anyway the hpv is scary enuf for sure and I'm worried that i can spread it since its supposed to be really contagious. I keep avoiding any sex xcept jerking off myself at this point bc of my fear of spreading something. I would never do that to someone. Could i have gotten hpv from his precum that got on my penis when we were jerking each other? There was a good amount of it and also he was uncut so i wonder if that would make it easier to catch something if he had it? Thanks again and your journal entry was really helpful..did u worry about any of these things like i am after ur encounter?  Jake

[caljake]

Hey i was wondering bout all of this. And when u say hpv is rare orally do u mean getting it orally from giving oral or from receiving oral on ur penis/genitals and getting it down there?? Thanks., Jake

[caljake]

Hi Grace, wondering if u have any thoughts on the hpv possibility for me in my situation. Was gonna post in the hpv area but thought it mite b easier to here. I'm really getting xhausted from the constant symptoms and trying to deal w the discomfort and the sight of the bumps i have. At this point they r small and unnoticeable to others [in shower or peeing at urinals etc.]but i'm afraid they will continue growing and become worse. Again i only had mutual masturbation and one time, 4 months ago. My hsv retest will be fri and i will b xamined again and be checked for the hpv. My mind is a tornado of thoughts surrounding this awful xperience. I can't believe i could have gotten all these std's from m/m and someone sucking my balls for a couple minutes. So confused as to all of the yes u can and no u can'ts. Please give me some insight. Thanks so much., Jake

[gracefromHHP]

odds are this isn't hpv going on either. You could in theory contract hpv from oral sex but it's not likely to occur.

bottom line is, be seen for your symptoms to try to get a better idea of what's going on. no reason to think this is std related from your encounter you posted about originally. we've already told you that a few times now.

if your anxiety continues, consult a counselor or a therapist to work on ways to relax and relieve anxiety. the more you worry, the more you examine yourself, the more you will find to worry about!

[caljake]

Thanks Grace, i feel like u have enuf xperience w it all, its not that at all just that it all started after the gym thing. I'm going to dr. fri and getting retested for everything as i said. Hoping for the best news possible and an answer to what's happening down below [something!!]. I've been doing some things to relax like running and kayaking and it has helped, i just wish the symptoms would clear up. I want to have a good relationship w someone and just need to know for sure i'm not going to spread stuff around if i decide to be with anyone and i haven't since my encounter. If i do end up w something [or don't] i will tell u here and hopefully learn to understand/cope w it from others.  Very greatfully., Jake

[caljake]

Hi GRace +all, wanted to update u on my progress. Got retested for gono, syph, hiv,hsv, chlamyd,etc and awaiting results. Got my hiv one back though, NEG =]  Didn't think i could have it but now i've been tested in April and this wk, both neg so they said i def don't have that. Got a visual hpv and doc and nurse both said the little bumps [which they could hardly see but r there!!] are most likely not hpv. Still looking for cause of my discomfort on butt area and head of penis. Was thinking of trying lamisil on the bumps?? Would that clear up a fungal thing if thats what it is?? I will let u know my results when i get them for hsv. Thanks so much for ur ears.,  JAke

[caljake]

Hi GRace and all.. Well i got my results today, ironically the same day as a friend. Tests showed neg for all stds i tested for incl hiv hsv chlm gono syph. Thing is is still have these littel bumps on head of my penis and not sure bu mab below my sack outside butt. Feels like tiny goosebumps. And the head is irritated almost all the time. Sometimes like today more and sometimes just the littel bumps and almost no irritation. Does hpv present itself w ANY pain or discomfort? The tiny needle pains i get now and then must be from something and the bumps were NEVEr there b4. Also does hpv cause any burning/warmer feelings where it is? Please if anyone knows anything about it i'm having a hard time understanding y after 2 sets of std tests[one at 1wk post xposure and now at almost 5 mos] i have no answer to this hell of symptoms. I could handle the hsv ob's coming and going and was ready to hear that but having this go on daily and the never go away bumps [not getting bigger realy in four mos since they showed up] is more than i can take. Thanks for listening. I really need someone who knows or has symptoms like me to help me to. Any info is huge for me., JAke  

[gracefromHHP]

you need to stop thinking this is std related!!!  You were seen and they didn't think that these were hpv related. Your description doesn't sound like hpv either. Your encounter wasn't really a risk for hpv either.

this isn't herpes. this isn't herpes.

if your regular provider isn't able to figure out what is going on, see a dermatologist.

[caljake]

Hi GracE. Thanks for ur reply..glad ur not w/o power still -=] And i know now its not hsv and so thankful for ur help and positive [the good postive!!] thogts bout it not being stds. Going 2 derm nxt thurs. Next step in my quest for peace down there. ANy info anyone here can give me re hpv or if there symptoms r lke mine [found a cpl guys who have similar btw!!] i would be grateful.. Thanks and best of luck to all ppl here on there getting well and good results.  I will let u know what i find out at derm. THanks again. JAke =]

[caljake]

hi grace. been a while but i've been around/cheking things out. I had a brief encounter at NYs w someone that did oral on me. It was really stupid. I was wasted and not thinking and it happend real fast. I've been haveing some irritatetions on it but the oral was pretty agresive. I'm freaking out but trying to stay cool bout things. TAlked to a guy i know who basically said no worries man kinda thing. He does it alot from what he said/same w another guy i talked to. For me i just don;t have the mind/I'm very ADD for casual stuff. Scary to me. So now i gotta get tested again n wait. It's prety humiliating to kick myslf in the crotch again like this/i;ve been really careful n did nuthing w neone for 6mos. I'm scared of sex now. Do u think i'm being paranoid or just overthinking it all? I was doing real good w things/now i'm terified all over again. thanks/JAke

[caljake]

Anyone? Would i feel irriateted/skin in the next day or so from herpes? I just looked at my penis and theres no bumps or nething but its irrtiateted. Could this be from it being sucked hard/roughly? And the tongue was rough/dry/from blazing before it all went down. If i test a week after how good is it? How likly is is it that i coulda got sometihng esp hsv 1 or 2. I didnt see any sores/i looked b4 i lept!! Thanks/JAke =/

[caljake]

But i was stupid.

[gracefromHHP]

this doesn't really sound like it's herpes going on.

[caljake]

Well i hope not Grace. I know this is a busy place n i know my q is kinda vanilla. But i was really good/smart bout thingsand now this. I know u mite get a empty chamber playing rusian roluette but i guess the only way to avoid the bullet is to put on the safety if ur not putting ur gun in the holster. The irritaetion is mild to medium but i have a hi tolerence for things. My penis is def irritateted so somethings up/balls to. Literaly a min or 2 tops down there was all that went on. I'm hopeing that it won't cost me 4 my whole life. One q that i really wanna know. Is neone else dealing w this rite now?? Also would u get these feelings b4 a 1st outbreak? I had no interscourse btw. Thanks/JAke

[caljake]

hi grace =] Wanted to ask u this q. I've been pretty lo in last sev days since i stupidly got the unprotected oral. What r the chances i got oral hsv1 and gen hsv2 both from this encounter?? I know its said that oral is safe/lo risk but i need to hear someone who knows there stuff. Also if i test a week or 2 after it can i beleve the results? R they reliable at all? So many ppl i talk to and know think that the oral thing is just nuthin to worry on. I'm confuesed. THanks/JAke

[caljake]

hey grace/all. =] So it's been a long time since i posted on here/jan was last time. I had a scarey time last year re herpes but came out neg on 2 separate tests. U told me over and over i didn't have it and u were right..so ffwd to now. I had met this gr8 guy and was seeing him sort of casually. I was seeing one or two other guys/hanging out really more then anything and i had oral sex w one of them[one time]/as well as kissing/no sores at all on it or his mouth. The guy i'm seeing and me have not had any sex xcept oral on him/no sores on it or his mouth at all. Last week[bout a week after i was w/the other guy] i got a weird feeling in my left corner of my lip and it was/is tingling some and sore/bothering me. I haven't seen any kind of bumps/sores or anything yet but idk how long it might take to have it break out[what would it feel like/would it have broke out already?? Also i had a sore throat/headache which lasted bout 5 days around then. I'm also now reworried bout getting/haveing oral/genital hsv1. =/ I know a one time encounter is sup to be lo risk but i'm really into the guy im seeing and don't plan on doing anything w/anyone else. It's hard enuf already to be a bi guy [which i'm ok w/now] and i'm scared that if i end up haveing the hsv1 this guy will drop me. He has seriosly changed my life and has made it better getting up everyday. I've had some terible things going on in last few yrs and if i end up w/the fking herpes after being selective and careful bout who i'm w/then it will really be a kick in my b*lls bc i've been doing much better. The other guy said he's clean. The clinic i have gone to before won't test for herpes unless u have symptoms. I got my gardasil shots there/3x and was tested for everything they test for last fall/all neg. I really cn't believe that it's this ez to get stds u know?? Guess i'm needing some advice and direction so pls hmu w some. Thx very much JAke =]

[gracefromHHP]

if you were negative for hsv1 and contracted it genitally, you would've had very obvious and 'classic" herpes symptoms.

have you and your new partner discussed std's and herpes testing? has he been tested at all?

[caljake]

Hi Grace =] No i haven't been retested again/i was last fall and was neg for hsv. I never knew my igg results or anything tho. They just said neg for herpes. I was tested in April 2011 and Sept 2011 at 2 diff places. I haven't had an genital symptoms but i have had a sort of tingling/ache in my mouth/lips area since early last wk. No sores on my mouth or anything or no open/weeping stuff. Mostly its my left corner of my mouth/in the crease. It was better for a day and then yesterday i was in the sun all day and it bothered me again. =/ Im afraid of rubbing my eyes or even when i shower im afraid of spreading hsv from my mouth onto m body/genitals. Is that possible?? My clinic won't test me for hsv bc i have no oviuos symptoms. I am plannaing to get tested for stds [they will test for all the other kinds] this week. I'm pretty sure im fine that way tho. Its this crazy hsv that seems to be the one i keep getting symptoms for!! If i hadn't had hsv as a child than i was thinking this other guy coulda gave it to me when we were kissing/makeing out on 5/14 and we only were together that one time. The sensations started the next weekend and i hadn't been w my current bf then. I'm mostly scared of oral sex w my bf now bc i'm afraid to give him hsv1 from my mouth if i have it. Am i being to paranoid?? And yeah i talked to him bout stds/we talked. Neither of us had been real active and always safe but u know hsv is diffrent it seems bc of how it gets on u. If i had got hsv1 on my genitals or my mouth would i have had a outbreak by now/2.5 weeks later?? And have u heard of an outbreak/orally w/no sores just tingling and achy/would it last a week and a half like this?? I am confused. It seems inevitable that ppl will get hsv.
=[  JAke

[gracefromHHP]

you do sound pretty paranoid about it all.

[caljake]

Hey Grace. Well yeah i guess i am kinda paranoid bout it. Just bc its a big deal to me and i wanna know if the symptoms i have cb from hsv. The tingling is still there/comes n gos and its a little numb?? in the same area of my lower lip and even my jaw some. Ok so pls answer this. Would an outbreak of hsv1 or 2 in my mouth be doing this? And if so would this last like wk and a half to 2 weeks w/no blistering things? I'm sad bout this. I feel like it will never stop bothering me and i will have this going on all the time. Thanks, JAke =/

[petal130]

No, this isn't herpes, as we've stated many times.

" I feel like it will never stop bothering me and i will have this going on all the time."
This has nothing to do with herpes but instead your constant fear/phobia of it. Your post has been going on a year and is basically the same issue over and over. Consider a mental health professional to work thru this irrational fear of herpes.

[caljake]

Hi Petal/Grace. Well thx for the answer/ ur not thinking its hsv1 on my mouth does help some/i'm not haveing any issues genitaly just on my mouth/ but no sores just some pain/discomfort and i guess u could say tingling/warm feelings so i was thinking i cb expecting sores to come out even tho its been going on for close to 2wks and no sores just some cracking open at the corners of my mouth/. I don't need mental help ;))  lol but yeah it def is on my mind and i wanna be sure i can't give my bf anything. It would be hard to live w/that for me. I am gna get tested again for all stds just to be sure bout it all. I know u have to wait 3mos for hsv testing but hopefully by then this will have stopped. I will still get tested for it tho/seems like the way to go. Really i ask u guys on here bc i have no one else to talk to bout it and hope to not get judged. I know u have other ppl to help but just know i appreciate the help i get here alot!!  Thx  JAke =]