new boyfriend has HSV, I do not

Hello,

I am female, in a brand new relationship with a male. He was infected 8 years ago. He is on daily suppressive. He has had 2 long term relationships with non-infected women since. One woman for 2 years, one for 6. He has a son with the woman from the 6 year relationship. He tells me that both woman remain HSV free due to taking proper precautions.
We dated for two months before we had any genital contact.
The relationship is great, we are good together. He told me he has genital herpes, and although I am quite fearful, I decided to proceed with the relationship. We had a "scare" after our first genital contact, approx 3 weeks ago. I saw my GYN who indicated that what I saw ( minor redness just inside my labia ) looked like absolutely nothing to him.
A full panel blood draw, and swab culture was conducted. At that point, all results were negative. This all took place just days after finishing my period.
Now, my period has started again ( a few days early ). We had intercourse (with a condom!) for the first time 2 nights ago, and my period began the following day, yesterday.
I seem to be experiencing some tingling on my clitoris. I pulled back the hood to look at the actual clitoris and I see what looks like tiny abrasions. What I am really getting at is...is this my head messing with me??
Will this post-intimacy anxiety ever go away with time? I really really want to be around this man, and he feels just as strongly for me, if not stronger. How have others dealt with this? He seems to be doing a lot to keep me safe, not just in bed, but also keeping a closer eye on his diet, and stress, etc. How low or high is my risk for getting it if we continue to be as "safe" as we have been?  

Any answers would be lovely,
Small

[petal130]

MALE TO FEMALE TRANSMISSION RATES (HSV 2 ONLY STATS IS NOT APPLICABLE FOR HSV 1) If you have 100 couples where the male has HSV 2 but not the female (these figures are over a year) the odds of male to female transmission are if you do nothing (other than avoid sex when there is an outbreak) 8-10 females out of a 100 will get herpes in a year or 8-10% If you do go on a suppressive therapy then it drops to 4-5 females out of a 100 in a year or 4-5% and if you use suppressive therapy and a condom the chances are 2-3 females out of a 100 will get herpes in one year or 2-3%.

The Valtrex and transmission study stats are based on having sex 2 times/week.