ok, firstly apologises this is going to be a bit of an essay, bt I need to fully explain my circumstances before I ask my questions. Secondly I know no one is going to be able to give me a definitive answer on this but I just need views etc. and finally , I know what ever people say its not going to change anything, but I just need information to help me get my head straight.
Oh and im going to get a bit 'detailed' so apologises if its too 'graphic'
Ok, so the situation is, I was diagnosed with type 1 genital herpes a few days ago. The facts are: I am with a new partner ( couple of months but only been having sex for the last month). Within a week of having unprotected anal sex ( yes I should know better) i started to feel achey , fluey and generally unwell. this was followed by extreme pain in my back passage area , to the extent when i tried to go to the loo I was in tears as I was in so much pain. Other things i noticed was I had a 'spot' near my backside and where my lip had split slightly from chapped lips I had an ulcer on it - never had one of those before. Anyway I assumed I had just got a slight tear internally as the sex was rather rough, and had ended up with some sort of injection sowent to the GU clinic to get checked out. Nurse examined me and said internally within my anus she could see slight trauma but also what looked like ulcers which could be herpes. I had no ulcers /sores in my vaginal area. Swab done etc etc and results have come back type 1 genital herpes. - big shock.
my past is that prior to this partner I havent had sex for 10 mths and last partner I was with was for two years.we had unprotected vaginal / anal sex. previous to that I did have a number of partners over the years, but at most only two did I have unprotective anal sex with. Throughout all this time as far as I can remember I never had any symptoms or issues 'down below'
The nurse at the clinic said based on my sexual history, the severity of the outbreak, and the timescales for when I had sex with my new partner and the type of sex we had it all pinpoints to the fact I have been given this virus by him.
now im not on a witch hunt, and I accept that I only have myself to blame for practising unprotected sex, I have admitted to my partner what I have been diagnosed with but his response is, well I dont have any symptoms, never have and my last girlfriend never had any problems so you cant have got this from me....... so my questions are...
what is the likelyhood that I could have had this for years , never had any symptoms and this is an inital outburst caused by whatever?
how long after inital exposure can the virus lay dormant before any sort of outbreak
due to where the sores were found ( internally) , is this going to be the site where I was initally exposed to the virus - and therefore is it a case that regardless of who passed on this virus to me, it would have to have been someone who I had had anal sex with
could I have had minimal outbreaks in the past and not realised and then for whatever reason out of nowhere had a really bad episode?
Is the fact that I got an ulcer on my lip at the same time any significance? - does it indicate / confirm that it was an inital outburst dues to the fact I was exposed to the virus in two places at the same time
how likely is it that my partner has passed this to me if he has never had any symptoms and nor has his ex girlfriend
if / when I get a reoccurance will it always be internally in my anus, or could it show up elsewhere - Im worried I could get one and not know !
I think thats it lol, he is going to the clinic this week to see if they will give him a blood test, but he is just very much, well I havent any symptoms so It cant be me, u just must not of known. Like I said it wont change anything, but Im just trying to get my head round this and the fact that I may have had this for years and the implications of that.
Thanks for taking the time to read this and any opinions u can give x