Aa
pain without blisters?
I had my first Herpes outbreak 4 months ago and a positive culture. The symptoms of that outbreak were a couple of small blisters and some moderate pain for about a week and a half. I have not had any symptoms since that time. Two days ago I noticed i was feeling a little more tired than usual, and started having some irritating pain on the same side of my vulva as the herpes outbreak. I looked and have no blisters...but the pain is a little worse - kind of a smarting and constant irritating pain. IS this a herpes outbreak? can you have sort of nerve pain without blisters? OR am i about to get the blisters?? thanks for any info....
Sorry. Also realized how old this post is LOL... my bad. Still here for support if anyone needs :) I've had herpes for about year and a half now with countless number of OB's.. I lost track.
Strongly suggest you tell him whether you think he knows or not.
If he doesn't know he could be passing it to other women and that's unfair. If you find out later he already knew, we'll then he's a careless a**hole for a lack of better words..
My outbreaks are usually just burning itching swelling and soreness ... occasionally i will get blisters though. I get outbreaks as early as 3 days apart and at least once a month... you learn the signs symptoms as you have outbreaks. I hope you aren't like me, where medications just aren't affective (50%) good luck. If you or anyone needs a talk feel free to message
If he doesn't know he could be passing it to other women and that's unfair. If you find out later he already knew, we'll then he's a careless a**hole for a lack of better words..
My outbreaks are usually just burning itching swelling and soreness ... occasionally i will get blisters though. I get outbreaks as early as 3 days apart and at least once a month... you learn the signs symptoms as you have outbreaks. I hope you aren't like me, where medications just aren't affective (50%) good luck. If you or anyone needs a talk feel free to message
if you don't want to write him an email about this then make time to call him. perhaps email/text him and let him know that you two need to make time to talk about something as soon as you can. I've been working nights for 25 years now and still find time for phone calls/texting every day!!
I think u should jst take ur time w all this. Given that u jst found out urself, y nt jst "accidentally" bring it up w him via email. That way u could include all the info u want ta say as oppose to a lengthy text message. 140 or 160 characters given w each. Lol. Bt anyway, in all seriousness, I do undrstand where ure coming frm w the way of "communication", smile, ben there, done that, at ANY age.
Howevr u make ur email to him, I say start w askng him, how often does he visit the doctor, and tested for std's. And also include in ur email to him, hw "unaware" u were that MOST doctors dn't test "specifically" for ALL std's during a standardized "std test". And "casually" ask him, "Well, have u evr requested a "specific" std test, other than the obvious, HIV?". Sneaky I knw, bt take it for a woman to get a job done, IN A HURRY!!! Lol. Anyway, however "sneaky", it's important! And it'll open up a "dialogue" w each other, where as he'll feel comfortable "talkng", evn if it is "EMAIL", and u wn't feel so over-whelmed or Obligated to tell him sumthing he should ALREADY know!!
Bt anyway, no judgements, on his or ur part, bcuz aftr all, whats done is done. And u can't undo the past or go back and "correct" it. That's hw I cope. Jar found out myself of my own status and I'm "A-SYSTEMATIC". NO SYPTOMS!
Anyway, hope that helps. And please do keep "us", the forum, posted.
Howevr u make ur email to him, I say start w askng him, how often does he visit the doctor, and tested for std's. And also include in ur email to him, hw "unaware" u were that MOST doctors dn't test "specifically" for ALL std's during a standardized "std test". And "casually" ask him, "Well, have u evr requested a "specific" std test, other than the obvious, HIV?". Sneaky I knw, bt take it for a woman to get a job done, IN A HURRY!!! Lol. Anyway, however "sneaky", it's important! And it'll open up a "dialogue" w each other, where as he'll feel comfortable "talkng", evn if it is "EMAIL", and u wn't feel so over-whelmed or Obligated to tell him sumthing he should ALREADY know!!
Bt anyway, no judgements, on his or ur part, bcuz aftr all, whats done is done. And u can't undo the past or go back and "correct" it. That's hw I cope. Jar found out myself of my own status and I'm "A-SYSTEMATIC". NO SYPTOMS!
Anyway, hope that helps. And please do keep "us", the forum, posted.
thank you for your response... aahhhh yes, a phone call. if only it was that easy. I need to tell you that this man and i rarely talk on the phone! we have opposite schedules, for one reason - he works all night and sleeps all day, and cannot talk to me from his job. Plus, he is just NOT one to talk on the phone - we connect mostly by text, sometimes by email, and IN PERSON is when we really talk. If you can please not judge this situation, as in " he SHOULD call you"....it wouldn't be helpful to me right now - the fact is that he doesn't. SO, you say i need to talk with him about having herpes BEFORE our next meeting, but how can i do that?! I don't see that happening! and how can i tell him in an email????!!
any advice here??
thanks for your other answers too! I didn't get tested for any other stds at PP, I could only handle one thing at a time, emotionally. but i do want to be tested for everything else, even though I know i am low risk - for God's sake, I have only had sex - seriously - about 7 times in the last 10 years!! twice with one person in 2006, and 5 times with this dear man who i received this infection from.... and i feel so sad right now about the whole thing... I finally find someone i like, share mutual attraction with - at the age of 54 - and feel in my PRIME sexually and he loves my passion....and we have THIS happen -- partly bad luck, mostly being naive and having sex ONE TIME without a condom - at MY suggestion.....and so sad that I have not told him yet....which is pathetic....communication needs to happen here, and i just need to know how to proceed in the best way for all involved......
thanks and would be grateful for any further input!!
any advice here??
thanks for your other answers too! I didn't get tested for any other stds at PP, I could only handle one thing at a time, emotionally. but i do want to be tested for everything else, even though I know i am low risk - for God's sake, I have only had sex - seriously - about 7 times in the last 10 years!! twice with one person in 2006, and 5 times with this dear man who i received this infection from.... and i feel so sad right now about the whole thing... I finally find someone i like, share mutual attraction with - at the age of 54 - and feel in my PRIME sexually and he loves my passion....and we have THIS happen -- partly bad luck, mostly being naive and having sex ONE TIME without a condom - at MY suggestion.....and so sad that I have not told him yet....which is pathetic....communication needs to happen here, and i just need to know how to proceed in the best way for all involved......
thanks and would be grateful for any further input!!
do you need to talk to this guy about this? yes you do. I suggest you do it before you meet up again. It won't get any easier the longer you put it off and he'll need some time to deal with this. Assume nothing about him and his knowing he has it and give him a phone call and discuss it all with him. You know what you have, you know where you have it and you know odds are because ofyour blood testing that you got it from him. That gives him a chance to deal with this is if it news for him and also gives him time for testing to confirm his own status too.
can you have sex during obvious lesions if you both have hsv2? yes you can. It's really not an issue other than pain depending on the location of the lesions.
did you also cover other std's with your testing at PP?
in the future, when you feel this sort of pain, start your antivirals right away. you can sometimes even ward off a full blown ob and they at least help speed healing the sooner you start them.
grace
can you have sex during obvious lesions if you both have hsv2? yes you can. It's really not an issue other than pain depending on the location of the lesions.
did you also cover other std's with your testing at PP?
in the future, when you feel this sort of pain, start your antivirals right away. you can sometimes even ward off a full blown ob and they at least help speed healing the sooner you start them.
grace
My culture, taken at the time I still had blisters, was a definite positive for HSV II. The later blood test I requested was negative for both IgG and IgM antibodies. Therefore, my infection was recent, and most certainly contracted the last time i had sex, which was the ONLY time in about a year. I wasn't given a numerical result, but am sure i could ask for it. I had all tests done through Planned Parenthood.
I didn't think i needed to bother with further testing as it seems pretty obvious that I have herpes. Right now actually, I'm very irritable from the pain of these blisters!! DAMN this herpes!!! there, needed to get that out, thanks!
I didn't think i needed to bother with further testing as it seems pretty obvious that I have herpes. Right now actually, I'm very irritable from the pain of these blisters!! DAMN this herpes!!! there, needed to get that out, thanks!
So you had a negative IgG blood test 2.5 months after onset of symptoms, is that right? What was the numerical result? Were you tested again recently?
Thanks for your response!! I left out an important fact - I DO know he is the source of my infection, as I had a blood test for antibodies about 2.5 months after being with him, at MY request, to determine if the man i've been with was the carrier. The test was a definite NEGATIVE for HSV II antibodies (can't remember if they are the igg or the other one).
He is the only man i have had sex with in the last 2.5 years, and we have only seen each other and had sex about 6 times! We got together this past Feb. but had not been together for 11 months before that, due to various circumstances. When I suddenly had painful blisters about 1.5 weeks after being with him, and found out it was HSV II, I suspected that he infected me, but also went through a LOT of worrying that somehow I had been infected years ago and it had been dormant, and that I could have infected HIM. That is why, after educating myself, I asked for a blood test to check for the longer term antibodies that are present after the initial antibodies are created, once infected. I was relieved to know i hadn't given it to him, but went through some anger at myself and him, and the situation...regretting not using a condom the last time! Like I said, he has ALWAYS used one with me...so I'm thinking he may know he has herpes, but I know you're right - there IS a chance he doesn't know. I'm worried about "the TALK" because we are still getting to know each other....but then again, it's possible it could bring us closer...anyway, thanks your answers!!!
He is the only man i have had sex with in the last 2.5 years, and we have only seen each other and had sex about 6 times! We got together this past Feb. but had not been together for 11 months before that, due to various circumstances. When I suddenly had painful blisters about 1.5 weeks after being with him, and found out it was HSV II, I suspected that he infected me, but also went through a LOT of worrying that somehow I had been infected years ago and it had been dormant, and that I could have infected HIM. That is why, after educating myself, I asked for a blood test to check for the longer term antibodies that are present after the initial antibodies are created, once infected. I was relieved to know i hadn't given it to him, but went through some anger at myself and him, and the situation...regretting not using a condom the last time! Like I said, he has ALWAYS used one with me...so I'm thinking he may know he has herpes, but I know you're right - there IS a chance he doesn't know. I'm worried about "the TALK" because we are still getting to know each other....but then again, it's possible it could bring us closer...anyway, thanks your answers!!!
Well, so now you know what a prodome feels like. The irritating pain you described was most probably a warning sign that an outbreak was coming.
It's VERY important that you talk with him about it. Maybe he doesn't know that he has it at all, maybe he does; but you gotta talk with him to find out. Tell him that your symptoms appeared after having sex with him, and that you had a positive culture for HSV2. Ask him if he's ever had symptoms and if not, if he's willing to get a blood test to find out his status.
If he does have herpes, there will be no issues when it comes to sex, since you don't ping pong the infection to one another. (Still, you gotta talk about getting tested for other STDs before resuming unprotected sex.) If he doesn't and you are wrong about having caught HSV2 from him, it's better for him to know about your status so you can both decide what to do to avoid transmission - using condom, taking antivirals daily, avoiding sex while having an OB.
Having sex with him during an outbreak is not a great idea, 'cause it'll probably be painful for you. Besides, you don't know if he has herpes. Still, if even after "THE TALK" you both decide to go ahead, it's not suppose to trigger an outbreak for him - that's not how the virus works. But again, you gotta talk to him, make sure he's really the source of your infection.
It's VERY important that you talk with him about it. Maybe he doesn't know that he has it at all, maybe he does; but you gotta talk with him to find out. Tell him that your symptoms appeared after having sex with him, and that you had a positive culture for HSV2. Ask him if he's ever had symptoms and if not, if he's willing to get a blood test to find out his status.
If he does have herpes, there will be no issues when it comes to sex, since you don't ping pong the infection to one another. (Still, you gotta talk about getting tested for other STDs before resuming unprotected sex.) If he doesn't and you are wrong about having caught HSV2 from him, it's better for him to know about your status so you can both decide what to do to avoid transmission - using condom, taking antivirals daily, avoiding sex while having an OB.
Having sex with him during an outbreak is not a great idea, 'cause it'll probably be painful for you. Besides, you don't know if he has herpes. Still, if even after "THE TALK" you both decide to go ahead, it's not suppose to trigger an outbreak for him - that's not how the virus works. But again, you gotta talk to him, make sure he's really the source of your infection.
Thanks for your response, but I did find the blisters last night...same location as my initial outbreak, same type of pain, but a tiny bit less painful.
I had almost forgotten I had herpes.... was hoping it wasn't a herpes outbreak, thought I might be lucky and not have another one!
This raises more questions for me, and would appreciate more feedback from you or anyone else on here....
Soon I am going to be seeing the man i was with 4 months ago, who I contracted this from...I haven't had the chance to tell him and wanted to do it in person (we live at a distance). But HOW important is it to tell him? I'm pretty sure he must know he has it, has always used protection when we have sex. I was the one who initiated no protection that last time, big lesson learned at 55!! so....am a bit nervous to tell him i got this from him, and since we both have it, really, how important is it to let him know i got it from him? Part me of wants to tell him, part of me doesn't.
also, if I have sex with him when i am having an outbreak, would it bring on an outbreak for him?? also, IF i am up to having sex, can it make my outbreak worse, as far as causing more blisters?
lastly, can a herpes outbreak cause tiredness? I was feeling a little more tired when i first noticed the pain, and have noticed during this outbreak that my energy level is up and down, feeling real tired at times.
thanks for ANY info on any of this...!!!
I had almost forgotten I had herpes.... was hoping it wasn't a herpes outbreak, thought I might be lucky and not have another one!
This raises more questions for me, and would appreciate more feedback from you or anyone else on here....
Soon I am going to be seeing the man i was with 4 months ago, who I contracted this from...I haven't had the chance to tell him and wanted to do it in person (we live at a distance). But HOW important is it to tell him? I'm pretty sure he must know he has it, has always used protection when we have sex. I was the one who initiated no protection that last time, big lesson learned at 55!! so....am a bit nervous to tell him i got this from him, and since we both have it, really, how important is it to let him know i got it from him? Part me of wants to tell him, part of me doesn't.
also, if I have sex with him when i am having an outbreak, would it bring on an outbreak for him?? also, IF i am up to having sex, can it make my outbreak worse, as far as causing more blisters?
lastly, can a herpes outbreak cause tiredness? I was feeling a little more tired when i first noticed the pain, and have noticed during this outbreak that my energy level is up and down, feeling real tired at times.
thanks for ANY info on any of this...!!!
It could be an outbreak that is not showing the blisters but it may not be. Not everything that goes on down there is HSV related. Be seen by your provider for a proper work up.
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Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
