I recently fell in love with someone who admitted to me that she has had HSV-2 for 4-5 months. She contracted it in Latin America over the summer and did not feel symptoms until the fall. She said that she had been symptom free for about 3 months prior to our sexual contact. I had both protected, unprotected and oral sex with her.
I realize this is a testament to my ignorance, but I did not realize at the time that herpes was chronic and assumed "symptom free" meant "clear of the infection." I went to get tested yesterday and the results have not come back, but have not experienced any problems yet (it has been a week now) and my doctor was reassuring in that he didn't believe I have contracted anything.
I love this girl. I still want to be with her and I would hate for something like this to prevent us from pursuing what could be a great, lasting relationship. I've already got an auto-immune disease so the idea of putting myself at risk for HSV-2 is daunting to say the least. My question(s):
- Are there steps, short of abstinence, that I can take to be extra pre-cautious in exposing myself?
- Is there something more that she can do to put me at less risk of catching her HSV-2?
- Is it possible or even probable for me to maintain a long relationship with her and never get herpes? My doctor seemed to indicate it was.
I'd appreciate any additional help or advice. I truly care about her and it would devastate both of us to let something like this ruin a great thing.
make sure your gf was properly tested for herpes to know her status. find out if she had a lesion culture of symptoms or just blood testing. if she only had blood testing, find out if she came here to post her results for a 2nd opinion to make sure that she was properly tested.
so if we assume you are negative for hsv2, if you and your gf did nothing but avoid sex any time she had anything going on genitally, you would be 96% likely each year NOT to contract hsv2 from her. If she takes daily suppressive therapy and you use condoms in addition, your odds are up to 99% likely each year that you wouldn't contract hsv2 from her. so bottom line is - be more surprised if you did contract hsv2 from her than if you don't :)
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