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Avatar universal

Genital Warts & Faithfully Married a LONG time

Ok, my wife and I have been married 14 years and were together for several years before that.  I had several sex partners before I met her, but since we've been together, I have never had sex (oral or otherwise) with another person.  I am 99% certain that she has not been with anyone during that time either.  Recently, I discovered 2 small bumps on my penis that turned out to be genital warts.  My question is this...how might I have contracted the virus?  Is it possible to get it from a way other than through sexual contact?  I have done extensive searches online and it appears that "regular" warts (i.e. those that appear on the hands, face, etc.) can be passed via towels or a handshake or some other kind of contact like that.  I also understand that HPV generally needs an "opening" through which to enter the body - a cut, for instance.  Isn't it possible that I was exposed to the strain of HPV that caused my genital warts in a way other than sexual contact?

After 14 years of marriage, our sex life is not the greatest.  I have never been unfaithful, but really don't know how she will react to the news that I have genital warts.  Any advice is much appreciated.
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Avatar universal
I am sorry to disturb your paranoia guys, but it's just impossible to contract genital HPV from toilet or tower or whatever it is. The virus simply can't "move" without skin to skin contact, means they can't move from your penis/vagina skin to toilet or to urine then move again from that medium to someone's else genital.

There are only 2 explanations to this:

1. your wife cheated on you
2. your HPV, which has been dormant for years, has been reactivated.

As for the 2nd case, it's rare. I would say it's the 1st option. You can't say "I know my wife 99% wont cheat on me" just because you believe you know her. These days i won't believe anyone 100%
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Avatar universal
Sorry said it 2 times my mistake
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Avatar universal
Hey! Hpv here I am also married... 7 years!  It is not possible for you to contact a genital warts from non-sexual Things!  The hands and feet towards come from that ..  such as what you say ...  there is however a possibility that you have had it for a very long time and it has lied dormant and is now starting to show symptoms ..  if you would like to know how I dealt with her about telling my husband you can message me ...  it’s very hard especially when you’re married ...  however if she loves you she loves you she will be upset but will get over it and chances are she has it to ...  it is possible to have hpv genital warts and not even have  symptoms..  I know how sad or Pissed you might be  because you don’t understand what could’ve possibly happened as I deal with this every single day of my life wondering how I got it ....   and what makes me even more mad is I can’t take away there’s nothing I can do about it but do the things necessary so my chances are less with symptoms ..  another thing is I am so frightened to hear the day that he gets  a wart..  we have sex about two times a week ...  and when we do it’s great I don’t ever want to use a condom and he does not either because we are trying for baby ...   I understand 100% how you were feeling and I know how hard it is for you to even take in..  but one thing for sure is you have to be able to except it because if you don’t it will drive you crazy like it has me ..   I contacted HPV a year and two months ago ...  I have what I think are two bumps below my vagina opening ...  I have went to my GYN  about 10 times and showed them where I was talking about and they said that that is not genital warts   That it was just skin abnormalities  something that is normal   But I don’t think so ...  these little ******* I feel could look like anything and now anytime I get any type of bump anywhere on my body  I am freaking out ...  I had replied to your comment because it had said happily married if you want to talk more you could message me .... I know right now you might think that everything is over with and that you will never be happy again but you need to brace yourself on what this is and how many people actually have it not that that makes it OK because I don’t want to have it and I’m sure you don’t either. I know right now you might think that everything is over with and that you will never be happy again but you need to brace yourself on what this is and how many people actually have it not that that makes it OK because I don’t want to have and I’m sure you don’t either .  But if you don’t want it to control your life you have to take the steps and just try to avoid it i use 2  supplements ..  if you want to know I will give it to you ..  I feel that it works very well one is all natural  and the other is a extreme immunity booster ..  I hope to hear from you soon
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Avatar universal
My wife got warts about 10 years ago, up to then we had been what I thought was 100% monogamous.  I read all the articles and assumed she must have caught it through some bad luck story, toilet seat or through Brazilian waxing.  Only 1 month ago after going through many issues in our marriage, did I find out she was cheating on me 10 years ago.  Haha!!
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Avatar universal
I think your reply was very irresponsible. HPV can certainly be "dormant" for many years. I recently had a wart (first time ever) from the shaft of my penis. I've been with two women in the last 12 years my last partner going on for 4 years and I was never unfaithful. Of course I can't be sure, but I feel quite confidant that neither of my partners were unfaithful either. So, I either got this from one of them because they had it before or I got it myself from sexual partners I had before either one.

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Avatar universal
My case are similar to yours. I m very certain both of us(my wife and me) are faithful and doesnt stray. This morning, my doctor diagnosed me with Genital Warts. And like you, i hve done extensive googling and all of the article said we can contract it via sexual contact only.

However, when i ask my doctor this morning, he said that sexual contact isnt the only way to get genital warts. He said if an infected person touches something and we touch that thing, we can get it too.

Also, after the diagnosis, i sent my wife for a check up and blood test was done. The result is negative. She dont have the any HPV!!!!!

I'm really confused now. What the hell is going on now?>>
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1 Comments
oh crappppp... I m the culprit!!!! As i hv said previously that my wife got tested after i was diagnosed with genital warts. I have just read an article that said this....

"Important facts about HPV:

    HPV infection spreads from one person to another through sexual contact involving the anus, mouth, or vagina. The virus can be spread, even if you do not see the warts.
    You may not see warts for 6 weeks to 6 months after becoming infected. You may not notice them for years.
    Not everyone who has come into contact with the HPV virus and genital warts will develop them. "


I hv no idea who gave me the warts. Maybe was my previous relationships before we are married, which is more than 20 years ago.


Avatar universal
i have just come into contact with it . But also other things going on at the same time with my husband ie woman saying to me he is cheating . letters of woman and messages on facebook sent from him to them he has also been known for cheating as he is a lorry driver ..l im extremley worried .
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Avatar universal
i m 26,un married and having darts,i m confused about my marriage what wd happen? can i produce baby safely or not? the whole life my wife would be in risk of getting that disease while staying with me?
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Avatar universal
hi, I unlike many of these people am like you. I have genital warts or they appear to be so. I think what your really looking for is an escape goat for the doubts that you are having about your marriage and your wife because you don't want to be believe even the possibility of the worst, and you are thinking to yourself  you know your body pretty damn well and this has never happened before. How did this happen to me? Could she do that? What do I do now? I thought we were in love? But the scientific data says i could have had this from before, but I don't believe that dormant crap. I am lost to and I wanted to know is there in other possibility in gods green earth that this has an alternate method of contact before I set the ship of sail and the earth off it's access. Listen, no one can tell you what to say or do read the info they are telling you they dont know how it happens they dont even have a test for it. So ask your wife if she cheated tell her you have warts and judge from your mind and gut and analyze everything because if you are wrong the next time it could be HIV.
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Avatar universal
My Dr. old me, that there is now way to say for sure that you cant catch it from other sources BECAUSE it is a virus.  You can touch your self and pass it to other parts of your body, how hard to imagine is it . You meet someone new, you shake their hand. Guess what 2 minutes earlier he was in the bathroom shaking his thing and didnt wash his hands.      Now its on your hands, you touch your face, you adjust yourself....anything is possible. Would it be the most common maybe not , but then again who is to say people say "they test" well guess what if it can lay dorment for 10 years how you gonna test that???   Well we did a study with 100 people for a year...well not everybody would show signs in a year and since they dont have blood test how would you know who has it.   Seems to me it would be a very hard thing to track . I have been with my husband for since high school 17 years, we split a few times and had other partners . But for the past 14 years we also have been faithful.   We have no reason to lie to each other, I have known this man over half my life... I can trust him ,he would tell me cause he knows we would work through it.        So  I guess 6 months now I have had gw , just out of the blue.   I was very ,very,very ill in 2007 I thought I was gonna die. It would seem to me if it was gonna surface it would have happened then.  My body was beat and battered and falling apart ...  not now when there has been nothing wrong.    So yes I think you can pass it other ways, soap,towel,toilet seat, shake hands, drink after. But that is just what I think .    SO nobody needs to come screaming show me proof, or you know for a fact it cant . There is no way it could be proven either way , until they find better testing methods.
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Avatar universal
I'm not a doctor but I do know that HPV is extremely contagious. Millions of people are infected around the world. So yes, I believe that warts may be transmitted by other means than sex.

Here's something you won't find on the medical websites you mentioned: in my case, a herpes cream called ZOVIRAX was very effective. My warts were permanently removed in a couple of days and no surgery was needed. I don't know if this works for everyone but it worked for me.
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2 Comments
IS that cream over the counter
IS that cream over the counter
Avatar universal
HPV can be passed by other means than sex.  Its most likely caused by skin to skin genital contact but anyone who says that it is not possible to be contracted by other means is lying.  Wart viruses are very resilient and can be transmitted by urine to urine contact from public toilets.  Has pee ever bounced on to you from a toilet?  Imagine that someone else with HPV peed 30 seconds before you.
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Avatar universal
i was happy with my life .i was pregnant married and then my husband was like what is that i had a wart inside of my private part .i didnt know what the hell it was ,i went to the doctor he was like u have hpv i was like what is that.and he told me ect.. i had 2 have a c-section i was really upset .and now i just cant take it anymore i really wanna die becuz this std my warts  r keep coming back my life is in hell i cry all the time my whole family is ruined becuz of this i just cant take it anymore .... they need 2 fined a cure and make us enjoy our life its not fair ..
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Avatar universal
I was also diagnosed with genital warts && have been in a faithful relationship for 4 yrs. my dr said it is possible that i came in contact with it before i even met him or that he could have come in contact with it before he met me. it is a very common std && some people can go their whole life without knowing they have it.
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Avatar universal
Can HPV be transmitted by handjob, where the person giving it touches the inside of the foreskin?
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Avatar universal
but, at the same time, what you should consider is your wife. the sooner you tell her, the better. genital warts means HPV, and she can have major health risks, so however you got it you should consider her health first. it was probably dormant, in her or you, so just assume that and do what you can and think about all the scenarios afterward. she needs to go to a doctor too-- it can cause cervical cancer, whether she got it from you and you got it from a bar of soap or not. really. but if she checks out fast, she has better chances of being totally unaffected.
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Avatar universal
okay, it's true that HPV is transmitted usually through skin to skin contact. it can be transmitted otherwise through unusual circumstances... laboratory conditions, say... so it's possible. You might be getting opinons of Lay People, but many of us (me for example) have similar experiences and are just telling you our experiences from what doctors told us. I have had hpv twice and it was never a question that i got the disease other than through sexual contact or skin-to-skin. yeah, i was in monogamous relationships. maybe one of you, you or your wife, had something lying dormant (very possible). it doesn't mean you were cheating. I was not, neither of the times i tested positive, and i was in a relationship with someone who tested clean (since i'm a woman, and men can't be positively tested til they have an outbreak). anyway, the best you can do is listen to the experiences of others and use it constructively rather than becoming so defensive and lashing out. i've asked doctors the same question, and the chance of me getting hpv through, say, a towel or a bar of soap seem so far off the map that it sounds ridiculous. this virus generally travels skin-to-skin and the chances of otherwise would be unusual and hard to do without some active effort. and, as a person whose had this twice, tons of checkups, lots of procedures, lots of questions and answers, and done lots of research, i'm confident advising other people. it could have been dormant. there you go.
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Avatar universal
remember u said u are almost 99% sure yr wife was not unfaithful.......... you are not 100%
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Avatar universal
the doctors won't answer here, but a simple google search brough up this, which you might find useful.

http://www.medhelp.org/forums/STD/messages/417.html

Key lines

"often there is a giant difference between "Can X occur?" and "Does X occur?"  Could HPV be transmitted to the genitals in the way you describe?  Possibly.  Does it occur with measurable frequency?  No."
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Avatar universal
Me thinks you are feeling guilty about something.
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Avatar universal
There isn't much point for anyone to clarify why your examples do not support what you your claims are. So I will just happily say - Goodbye then! :)
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Avatar universal
And I don't see why you feel the need to keep replying and adding to this thread when you don't have anything constructive to say.  I still have yet to see an answer from someone who truly knows what they are talking about.  All I see is opinions of lay people.  I have put forth a hypothesis about how I might have caught the virus and all I REALLY want is a qualified opinion as to whether or not that hypothesis has any merit.  I don't know how much more clear I can be.  Obviously, I think it does or I wouldn't keep bringing it up, but I swear, if people would stop replying just to reply, this would have been a much more pleasant experience for ALL of us.  

I can just about guarantee you that I have read all the same things you and others have read that are available on the Internet.  One reason I asked the question in the first place is that I have seen story after story from people claiming to be virgins who have contracted genital HPV and/or genital warts.  They could ALL be lying or mistaken...but I kinda doubt it.  But you know, I'm not even going to bother to check this anymore.  I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, the free advice here is worth exactly what I paid for it.
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Avatar universal
I'm not sure why you feel the need to attack or be disrespectful to anyone on this site. This is a site of intelligent and informed people if you want a medical expert then pay the money and post your question on the expert's forum. Many of us have here have done our research. It seems to me you don't want to hear what any of us have to say unless it is the answer you WANT not necessarily what is commonly believe in the medical field. HPV is still not fully understood in the medical field and research is ongoing daily.
As for the statement provided....
"The types of HPV that cause genital warts are usually spread by direct skin-to-skin contact during vaginal, anal, or possibly oral sex with someone who has this infection:
"USUALLY' is referring to the fact that the most common method of transmission is INTERCOURSE (whether it is vaginal, anal or oral). HPV does not always require intercourse in order to be transmitted but can be contracted with simple SKIN to SKIN (genital) contact.
You obviously have made your own decisions as to how HPV can be contracted and if you want to believe you can contract HPV through a towel, then none of us will be able to change your mind.
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Avatar universal
The answer is "no", huh?  Really?  Are you a medical professional?  Can you state that with absolute certainty?  I guess you people either don't or can't read what I wrote here.  I don't know why I thought this forum would be populated with intelligent, thoughtful people.  Turns out it's no different from any other public forum on the Internet - full of uninformed, unqualified people making blanket statements.  

I wonder why, on the ASHA's (American Social Health Association) own website, it says the following:

The types of HPV that cause genital warts are usually spread by direct skin-to-skin contact during vaginal, anal, or possibly oral sex with someone who has this infection.

Notice the word "usually"?  It does not say "always", it does not say "only" so...ONCE AGAIN, it seems only logical to me that there must be SOME other way(s) the virus can be transmitted to a person.  If you have proof of what you're saying, I'd love to see it, but otherwise, please don't bother to reply here.  Seriously!
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