This forum is an un-mediated, patient-to-patient forum for questions and support regarding HPV issues such as: genital warts, causes, diagnosis, cervical cancer, HPV in men, PAP tests, treatment, telling your spouse or partner
I am female and married, I made a stupid mistake yesterday which I regret with all my heart. I had sexual contact with another man, a friend. This consisted of mutual masturbation, he performed oral sex on me but I did not perform on him. He tried to have unprotected penetrative sex with me, but I didn't want it and pushed him off. He did rub his penis against my clitoris and genital area but did not actually penetrate the vagina. During this time I noticed he had what looked like a genital wart. I freaked out and stopped the whole thing. Ever since I've been consumed with guilt and regret at even getting myself into such a stupid situation, I am now terrified he may have given me and STD. What are the chances from this type of contact and should I stop having sex with my husband until I am tested. Also how long do I have to wait before testing. I'm not concerned about HIV as he is a very low risk, other STDs I feel may be more likely and am worried.
oral sex is low risk of std's but not no risk. since you have a husband, you should seek out testing for gonorrhea and chlamydia testing after 1 week post encounter.
have you had your gardasil shots for hpv?
herpes, syphilis and hpv can be transmitted from oral sex as well as direct skin on skin contact ( naked outercourse ). The risk of contracting these are low from a one time encounter - up to you if worth testing for herpes 3 months post encounter and syphilis 6 weeks post encounter.
is he going to be seen to see if indeed this is a wart? if it is, nothing you can do at this point and really no testing that can be done. should you develop an obvious wart, be seen and get it removed.
Thanks so much for your answer, I'm definitely going to get tested. I feel like such a fool. No I haven't had an HPV vaccine, they are not usually given as a matter of course to women my age (30s) in the UK, I'll be checking for warts.
Should I wait a week for chlamydia or 2 weeks? The Internet seems to have contradictory advice.
I'm so scared that I will have to tell my husband if anything is positive, just feel like my life is over if I have anything.
It's going to be a long 6 weeks with many sleepless nights until I can be tested for Syphilis and an even longer 3 months for Herpes. I am not so concerned about HIV, I realise I gave practically nil risk there. I used to suffer from health anxiety and thought I'd got over it, but this problem has just set me back in every way, and I brought it on myself which is even worse. Thanks for taking the time to respond.
I'm sorry to hear of your experience, I have no doubt that like myself, your wife regrets her actions with every cell of her being. Believe me if I could take the time back I would not have acted as I did and have learned a very tough lesson. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive your wife and move on from this, I'm sure like myself that she will never ever act in this way in the future.
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