Help! Post Complete Hysterectomy emotions

HI guys,

I was hoping someone could help me.
I had a radical hysterectomy after dealing with very severe endometriosis for 10 years. Before my hysterectomy I was blessed to have had my son after great difficulty via IVF. I was 25 at time of hysterectomy and thought I would get  through it with ease given my age... Very wrong.

I have turned into a monster, pushed every friend and my family to disown me and making horrific decisions that I would NEVER had made before surgery. I have left my marriage in tatters and my son watches me go through an emotional rollercoaster daily at four and  never in my wildest dreams I would have been ok with diplaying it to him. In saying that Im a good mum and take care of him and love him with all my heart but I just dont know what to do. If my son wasnt here, I would have packed my bags and dissapeared off the face of the planet. I have embaressed myself infront of everyone I know with my raging temper and ridiculous decisions. I find problems in everything and left my husband also on and off for two years becoming promiscuous in between. THIS IS NOT ME! Im trapped in someone elses mind and cant get out.

Please help me as I am lost for what to do. I have told my gyneacologist but he cant seem to find the time for me unless I require surgery. Im so desperate and dont know where to turn. Whats wrong with me?


Thanks