For those who have been a victim of an affair and are trying to get their life back on track. This group can discuss the feelings and emotions behind it and also support those who are trying to recovery from it.
Those three words can add up to one of life worst experiences anyone can go through.Its called the black hole of hell.
When I was at my lowest
here are my thoughts which I wrote. You Like Dark Enter My Mind
Great sadness strong to survive.
True love no more.
Just distrust and distrust
Stand at my door.
Ok ....Now do do I let those feelings stay with me ? let them in to eat away at my mind ? or do I over time ! close the door on them and get on with my life.????
I would think that the choice would be easy to make..... but for some its not and misery becomes a warm blanket to wrap around them and disappear into time and time again.
That is their choice and theirs alone..... But they have no right to use other peoples experiences to keep rekindling that anger on to them and drag them back into that Black Hole of Hell.
Why do you think that there are professionals out there to help them get on with their lives,Why do they go to them ???
Because they want to heal Not be consumed with anger and bitterness for the rest of our lives through no fault of their own.
Why should they not forgive that partner that they love ???? we should support and encourage their choice.... help them move on.... Not try to push them back to that anger and resentment that some of you cannot come to terms with !!! is it because misery needs company ? they have chosen their way ....let them carry on their journey even if you cant.
Everyone deserves a second chance in life and if you cannot forgive and move on what hope is there.???
Remember a human being can only take so much punishment... like a beaten dog, in the end they will run away in despair thinking there is no hope of forgiveness.
Dee Dee I am sorry if I gave you the wrong advice just clumsily trying to ease your pain ,also what is it about us females that want to know every little detail (i did too) do we want to chewing it around in our mind until we go mad.I was never told and now I am glad of that ...as it would have meant that I would keep tormenting myself time and time again.... ignorance( in that instance) is bliss believe me.
Thanks guys ....you give me hope.All I am trying to do is help understand the ones who cheated and now regret it with all their heart.And no....... I am not talking about serial cheaters who don't give a stuff about anyone but them selves...they need a good kick up the B.U.M and sent on their cheating way, they are the ones who want to stay in the honeymoon phase forever.... they need that high.Trouble is nature only allows our hormones to go into overdrive while we are connecting! then its up to us.
In that way I believe like an addict they have to have that feeling of euphoria all the time,Walking on air .... mind full of that person...excitement.A lot of them believe that is true love and it should go on forever .These are the ones that do the most damage because they leave a trail of broken hearts behind,but they go on their merry way oblivious to the mayhem they have caused.
This is the worst type of cheater I think.... because at the time they believe everything they say and do.
Ma'am, God bless you. I think my wife is going to come to terms with this. I have all the faith in the world. it is a bumpy damn road, but we will survive it.
Actually, when I found this board and signed up, I thought when I spilled my guts all I was going to get was a hard time. (For what I did, I guess I thought I deserved it) In return, all I got out of this board was a ton of good information and a ton of opinions that represented just about every emotion under the sun.
For that, I truly wish to thank all of you. Thank you for the support you have shown Dee Dee and myself, and thank you for all of the words of encouragement. It all does mean so much and it does shine a lot of hope into this journey.
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