no kidney at all

[AENJHIELAISHA]

hi to all of you i am new to this site and im so happy to found this kind of site to help people specially women seeking for a friend and companinon when the times like this.i ha ve a question about my pregnancy.im still pregnant and still growing but on my second trimester.my dr's told me i am carrying baby without kidney at all.after all of a sudden i was so shockhaving a long time and been pregnant for 4th times i never heard anything like that.so anyway they told me to terminanted the baby but i refused it.i believe in god hoping that only god could answer and i believe that ther's always a reason for evrything.im still a little bit unanswered my question why my baby never develop the kidney at all?the dr's said its a mother nature didnt give one for my baby.so thats why they give me option to terminate it.but they if i dont want it thats fine but they let me know that there's nothing gonna change.the baby not gonna survive at all evethought im going trought full term.they reall didint give me any good news ,they really told me that there not gonna do anything to my baby after all coz the baby not gonna survive without the kidney at all.so if you have any idea im open to hear anything,any kind of conclusion i will appreciate that thanks and plz help me to pray to help my baby to survive.i let the god do his job fer evrything.wile im waiting anytime soon till the baby born im still holding tight to gods will.help me to pray for a miracle pls pls pls pls and thanks to all of you

[FurballsMom]

I'm so sorry to hear that your baby isn't developing kidneys.  I've never been pregnant, but as a nurturing kind of woman I can still understand the dilema you're facing.  I know that since my own beliefs are so strong that I would be left worrying about what the doctors are saying about terminating the baby, too.  Still, I'm left wondering what I would do in your situation, because the baby can't survive on its own outside of the womb.  I have a friend who ended up with a tubal pregnancy one time when she was a few years younger than I am now.  There was no way the baby could survive and it was a case where not terminating was not an option, because the pregnancy almost killed my friend, too.  She was heart broken about the whole thing, because like you she really wanted the baby so much.  There was another time when she got pregnant and was so thrilled and excited that she was pregnant, but that time she miscarried.  Both times there wasn't anything she could do to stop what was happening to her or her unborn baby.  I'm so sorry that you're facing a similar type of situation.  Unfortunately, I think this is a situation when no one can tell you what decision to make, because what ever decision you make in this sad situation has to be one that your conscience can live with.  This personal decision is between you and your God.  I can only pray that this situation has a good outcome for you and your baby.  I know that God is gracious and kind and won't hold you accountable for the kind of situation that you have no control over.  I know you wouldn't have posted this heart wrenching story if you weren't so torn up because you really want your baby.  I wish so much that there could be better news for you and your family.  I wish so much that there were words that could express how much I wish I could give you the comforting news that you want so badly to hear.  It's hard to give such depth of emotion the justice it deserves even to a stranger with just words through the internet when you're going through such emotional pain and trauma.

[MSKshelly]

I have to say, I commend Fursballsmom for the most went written post
I can imagine in such a horrible situation!  Only you can make your decision
with God's help as she said.  The key make the decision you are going to
be able to live at peace with the rest of your life.

I would think seeing or not seeing kidneys is pretty definate with the new 3D ultrasound etc. BUT, as a small ray of hope within the last year I have seen several amazing
miracles, two different friends were told their babies WOULD be born with heart defects from the test.  The one was kept in the hospital the last month since she
was considered so high risk and the babies heart had to me monitored all the time.
Amazingly at birth both were completely normal and there is NO heart defect.

I had another friend diagnosed with ovarian cancer, by two radiologists and an oncologist.  They highly pressured her to abort her baby since her life was at stake and treatment had to begin immediately.  She refused and carried her baby full term
with much fear and tears and prayer.  In the end it was only a mistake, they misread her tests or so they say, either way the cancer is gone, no signs at all and she has a happy new baby!

Hang in there, I can only imagine the sorrow in your heart and confusion as to what decision to make.  I hope for a miracle for you as well.

Shelly

[Ana234]

Hi,

I was also told with my second pregnancy that i was going to have a baby without kidneys. I worked in the maternity ward doing C-sections and had seen many things. I realized that i could not control this and left it in God's hands. I have a book of ultrasounds from 18 weeks to 32 weeks which showewd no hope. I believed God that had told me what was not there is there. They kept watching my amniotic fluid which was  low. I prayed all the time, walked in faith and had peace in my heart. God knows why all happens, even if i do not understand. I carried to full term and as soon as my son was born they did an ultrasound because i told them i was living the next day with him. The Pediatrician came back and said they had bad news, He has both kidneys but one of them is a pelvic kidney. I laughed because what for her was bad news for me was a miracle. Normal size kidneys and it is not understood why they did not see them in 4 months of ultrasounds.

I will pray for your miracle and God bless you.

Ana

[FurballsMom]

You went through a very difficult decision that only you as the mother could ever have made.  I have heard of similar stories as yours that had turned out much better than the doctors had expected.  I have heard of experiences where the outcome was exactly what was expected, too--tragicly.  I can't think of anything more difficult for a pregnant mother to have to face than to have doctors persuading her to terminate the pregnancy for what the doctors believe to be a hopeless situation.  But, it is just so absolutely vital to respect the parents' conscience, because the parents have to live with that decision for the rest of their lives and could end up being haunted with self doubt always questioning their decision with "what if..."  That can be harder to deal with than dealing with something like a miscarriage that just happens spontaneously through no fault of the mother.  It is important to understand that God does not hold us accountable for things that happen that we have no control over, so neither should we.  How wonderful that your son was born with both kidneys.  Congratulations!