My baby doesn't love me??

May sound stupid, please don't laugh. My baby is 13 month old, she is my second daughter - first one is 19 y.o. Different fathers and countries. I'm 39 and fell in love hill over head with my little one. I was breastfeeding her for 11 month, and stayed home with her for 6 month. After that i've started working 2-3 days per week, and her father was staying with her during that time. We also have my Mom living with us, she works full time and is only home after 7 or 8 pm.
I am scared to discover this feeling in me - i see how my little dear daughter jumps to my Mom when she comes home, and she doesn't want to come to me. She does same thing with her father - if one of them is at home, she always prefers to be with them over me. I am so disappointed! Plus - she would fall asleep in my husbands arms easy, quickly, no questions, when with me she started playing after she finishes her bottle, and ruins her first nap(for the past few weeks). When Father is with her she sleeps her regular two naps. Is that possible that baby prefers her father, despite the fact that i was breastfeeding her?

[BabyBlue07]

Breastfeeding the baby doesn't you are going to be bond with the baby... Breastfeeding only give your baby more protection when she was an infant...

To be bond with baby.. you have to look back how you treat the baby.. Did you yell at her? are you patience with her?  did you frustrated and got mad at her? etc... there are so many reasons why your baby isn't close to you....

Baby can sense... and if she is afraid of you.. she won't come to you... Maybe the baby feel more secure and safe around grandma and father... I don't mean you are bad mom or anything.. I just think of the possiblity why baby refers to grandma and father more than you..

Mostly baby always close to the mom than any other people... You might want to look back and see why she acts the way she acted...

Good luck and I hope my honest opinion won't defense you... if it does... i do apolozy....

Take care

[teresamsmith]

At this age, your baby loves her mama...She may be picking up on your feelings of not being able to be with her, the she senses that you are upset, not at her, but maybe at the situation, I understand how/why you would feel this way, I too felt this way, but maybe trying to just relaxing and enjoying the time with her, she will pick up on that feeling instead of the frustation you may feel.  Just relax and enjoy the time you do spend with her...

[Macsmom2009]

Take her staying up and not napping as a good sign. In all of my birthing classes they said that working moms would deal with this. The baby will sleep around the major care giver and then play around you because you aren't there all the time and she just wants time with you.

I felt the same way when I went back to work, I thought that my son was starting to forget me during the day and that he favored my husband. But my husband and I now make it a big deal when I walk in the door. We holler "Mommy's home!" and we start clapping. Now my son is so excited to see me walk in the door.

Talk to your mom and husband, ask them to help you make it seem really exciting when you come home from work. It will help you as it helped me.

Babies go through so many changes, this too shall pass. Hugs.

[armybratOK]

I feel the same way alot. My daughter gets excited and reaches for me when I get home from work, but after about 5 minutes she's ready to go back to daddy. I can't even get her to say mama. I try and tell her to say mama and she comes right back with "daddy" I know she loves me, but it still hurts my feelings.

[Hilushka]

Don't you think that we have been cheated? We had babies, we pay the price of having them but others take benefits? I never stop thinking this way ...fathers' day? Excuse me?! Not in my household. I do the work he gets benefits.... had a baby went to work, baby gets used to not being around me and bond is broken...do not full yourself...now your "whoever" is most important in the world...and if the baby is in daycare so it is the institution rising your kid not you...Girls we have been dooped!

[Yulisw84]

I have the same situation. I am a mother with a 21m old boy and a 9m old girl. I stay at home as a full time mom and still breasfeeding my baby gilr. My son has been spent his whole days with the nanny. When her sister wakes up, i put them together to play, and i am the main for sure. I cook for him, give him the snacks he likes, and also sit together watching movie and do the story telling for him. However, he choses his nanny instead of me. Thats really hurt me. He also likes his daddy a lot. He always runs into his daddy, and get sleep with him. The names of his first calls were "daddy" and "sus" ( name of the nanny). He always refuses to call me "mommy". I cried for days. I think this is just not fair. He spents more time with the nanny and less with his daddy. I still have to breatsfeed his sister and send her to sleep. I am in the middle. But, anything we do to make him call me, just useless. He also listens more to his nanny and daddy. I feel so sad. Seems i am nothing to him.

[Newmommy8185]

I would have to disagree with you. Breastfeeding your baby means that you DO bond more. I don't think the mother did anything wrong.

Babies are sensitive and if mommy is nervous or upset they pick up on that. I don't think it's fair for you to say its her fault.