This is something I've never seen a post about..What happened when you had baby #1 (or even #2)?You managed-like me-to hold in your arms a much desired little baby and then.. what?Was your whole life upside down?Wasn't it like a thunderstorm that swept everything you knew-had with your husband and put it in another perspective?Did you breastfeed and felt exhausted for month(s)?How did you feel about sex?How soon were you ready to feel like an (erotic) woman again..how soon did you manage to organize your life back again and be able to find time for you and dh? I 'd love to hear other people's experience..
WELL, It is a huge change. Like they say, your life will never be the same :) My dh and I had our certain ways of doing things. We had LOTS of arguments. Now that our kids are now 9mo's and 2 we know what to expect from eachother. It's easy to get upset and frustrated with the unexpected, it just takes time :)
it is hard but the best thing you can do for your baby is to love his daddy. Many men feel left out after the birth of a child. They feel replaced by the child and knocked out of their number one spot. You have to remember that they were little boys cuddled and coddled by their mommies and then we replace that and boost their egos and make them feel important. hehe men are simple creatures but have to be made to feel important. It is very important to show your baby a healthy relationship as he will base his relationship in the future on what he sees between his mommy and daddy. It is a lot of work but worth it. I will suggest a book. the proper care and feeding of marriage by dr. laura.. it is great.. good luck.. and ps: my baby is 9months and I still barely ever want sex, still do it but not much desire. hey women are good fakers haha.. I am hoping it comes back soon
Meli - "men are simple creatures but have to be made to feel important. " That is too funny!! lol!
Everything changes when you have a baby!! I feel our dd has made us closer but in some ways she did take his #1 spot in my life and that is just the way it has to be...she is a baby and he is an adult. I am pretty sure she also took my #1 spot in his book too!! We work opposite shifts so our time together is limited. We really have to make sure we get some time together on our days off or it gets too hard.
I was very exhausted breastfeeding until I got my dd to sleep through the night at 10 months. That really helped tremendously. I had no idea how tired I really was until I slept for 8h again! I had no sex drive while breastfeeding at all. We were still active but I was not into it and did not want him anywhere near my bbs. Once I started weaning her I felt like myself again in that area and all is back to normal now. Well - as normal as it is going to get anyways! haha Not as frequent as before but we try. It's quality not quantity right??
We had no trouble keeping our life going just as it had been with our first. We just took him along on all the trips, grandma watched him so we could get away, and I felt great. No troubles! We had a great baby though, so that helped.
Number two has been a different story. He's very high maintenance, and I'm 5 years older so I find myself exhausted all the time. All I want is to crawl in bed and have a nap! And, we can't really travel like we used to because grandma is scared to take two of them! LOL! So, I'm finding it much harder with number 2, but I know he'll grow out of the "infant" phase and things will be a little more manageable soon. If I could get 8 hours of sleep in a row, just a few times, I think my perspective would be better too! Ha!
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