Almost 2 wont talk

My son will be 2 March 9th. He doesn't talk very much. Every now and then we hear a few choice words like "Mya" (our dog), "Tyler" (his brother), mom, dad, car and Hi. But not a whole lot above that. I blame a lot of it on myself with allowing him to keep the pacifier for so long we just got him off that about 6 months ago. Now he just trying to mumble everything. Its like he thinks he's talking but his mouth is shut. I know a lot of it was my other kids talking for him as well, but I'm not sure what to do. Of course now with a 6 week old at home he sort of wants to be the baby again as well. Any advice is welcome. I'm just not sure what to do, a family friend keeps telling me he needs speech therapy but I think he knows he just doesn't want to. He follows directions very well, he just won't talk. Thanks in advance! I really appreciate any advice!

[Me2mommy2b]

HI, amber.  Can you give me more info as to how he communicates if he's trying to communicate at all?  Is there a lot of gestering?  Does he "approximate" words?  

[lola4]

Hi Amber,
My Nephew did not start talking until he was over 2 years old. Now we can't get him to stop! He was very busy with other things. Some kids, especially boys just develop certain skills later. His fine motor skills were in the 100th percentile but he wasn't talking! It will happen. A speech therapist did come and work with him 1 day a week. At his age it couldn't hurt to call a therapist. Also, have you had his hearing checked? If you are not noticing any other abnormal behavior I wouldn't worry.

[amberd5191]

He does gesture for somethings, mostly though he just brings you what he wants for example he brings you his cup and mumbles with his mouth shut. The things that he does say are very clear. He also follows directions very well, for example pick it up, or throw it away, or can you get me a diaper. He understands it all perfectly. Even if I tell him its nap time (he runs down the stairs) :) but he just doesn't speak. Except for those few select words.

[Me2mommy2b]

I can see that his receptive language skills are where they should be but his expressive are a little delayed.  I wouldn't worry about it at all.  It doesn't hurt to get him checked out by a speech therapist and at this age, he should qualify for free services (what state do you live in?  do you have any programs like early intervention for children from birth to three?).  I'm currently working with a 19 months old (I'm a speech pathologist) who has NO expressive language...I mean NONE.  He doesn't even say mama.  I'm sure that eventually he'll start talking non stop.  I would suggest you model words for him (instead of saying "you want this?" say "you want juice?").  Also, be animated when you talk.  Does he make any animals sounds?  Sirens?  Cars going "whoosh" or "vroom, vroom"?  This is important for their development.  I wouldn't worry about it just yet.  Most kids pick up after 2 and do wonderfully :)

[JoyRenee]

Totally in agreement with me2mommy2b. My niece is over 2 and she CHOOSES to not talk but just grunts and mumbles. They, too, have a newborn in the house. Give the little guy some time and make sure you're using complete sentences (not baby talk) with him and giving him opportunity to speak.

What I tell my daughter (2 1/2) is that I can't listen to her unless she uses her big girl words. And then I'll ignore her until she speaks (or if she doesn't know the words, gestures). Then I give her lots of praise, eye contact, attention, and I fulfill that need that she was previously whining and screaming about. This tactic has worked wonders for keeping tantrums to a minimum as well!!!

[amberd5191]

I live in Minnesota, I'm not sure of any programs so I'll have to search for one. He doesn't make animal sounds but he does go vroom vroom when he plays with cars. Thank you so much for your help! I will try and find a speech therapist in the area to evaluate him :)

[kcs08]

Have you asked your pediatrician?  I'm assuming you will need some type of referral...if he has met all his milestones then I'm sure he'll catch up eventually.

[Crritter]

Okay, I hate to be the downer here, but have you been totally honest with his ped about his speech?  My sis has a little boy who was not talking much at 2, he would kinda mumble or whine and gesture, he did say 2 or 3 things okay, and when the Dr. would ask her how he was at home she would assure the Dr. he was talking some and even putting words together.  In all honesty, he would say "wassat?" for what's that?  She brought him home for the holidays and my son who is 6 months younger was talking circles around him, walking backwards, dancing, jumping...tons of things.  It was at that time they decided to get his hearing checked.  Finally when he turned 4 they diagnosed him as autistic.  It takes a long time, but if it's something simple like hearing, he needs to be evaulated early on so they can help him with his speech before he gets too far behind.  He may just choose not to talk, but even now at this age, you need to make him talk and work on those skills.  I would be call your ped and get an appt to have him evaluated and see what's going on.  Coul,d be nothing, but if he does need a little help, it's best to do it now before he gets further behind.  I doubt it's the pacifier as we have a kiddo that used one till almost 3 at my son's daycare and it didn't affect her speech, plus it's been 6 months.  I'm sorry, but I think that by 2 yrs. old he should be saying a whole lot more, baby in the house or not.  

[amberd5191]

Yes I have been completely honest with his pediatrician. She said at 18 months she thought his speech was fine and we would reevaluate it at 2, well he hasn't had a 2year appt yet as he is actually still a month away. However, when I had my daughter in last week I brought it up to her again told her all he does is mumble she just smiled, said "I'm not too worried about it". All of his other skills are above his age level. I was going to update any way. That I found the Earlychildhood Intervention Center for my county and they are sending out the paperwork for me to fill out, then they will come evaluate his expressive language.

And No I'm not saying it is all because of the baby or pacifier. Aside from that his two older siblings that talk for him. I think that does have a lot to do with it, it may not be all of it but I think it accounts for some of it.

[Crritter]

I didn't mean to sound harsh, I just saw something similar happen to my nephew and the Dr. was not worried at all until his speech never progressed.  I would think as long as they are aware and on top of it that's great.  I know the older kiddos can talk for the younger ones, I know they made my sis have her little one talk more and make him ask for things to get him working on it.  I am just speaking from an experience that didn't go so well, and I watched how it was made worse by people saying things like, he's just not a talker, he has others speak for him...that kind of thing.  I just felt that while it could be something like that everyone on here is reassuring and all, but it could be something else and if they've never dealt with it as our family has firsthand, they may not think about it.  It's something I watch closely as my sons are high risk for certain disorders because of their cousins.   I'm sorry if I came off rude or mean, but it's a littel disheartening to hear everyone sugar coat it, it's something that should be addressed and you are right to look into it.  Good luck.

[amberd5191]

I appreciate your honesty! I just feel like I am going in circles with his ped not worring as much as I am. I appreciate hearing two sides to the story, I don't want to panic about it as I'm sure he'll catch on eventually I just want to make sure he gets the help he needs.

[2ndBaby]

Your county has a Birth to 3 program.  I know because my friend works for this program in Hennepin County.  But most states run this program.  Sounds like you're on your way with the paperwork you'll be getting.

My nephew was evaluated around age two because he didn't talk more than a handful of words.  Through therapy in the birth to 3 program he literally blossomed!  Seriously, he now will not hush up for a minute :)

[Me2mommy2b]

I'm glad that you're getting him evaluated.  I'm interested to find out what the SLP (speech language pathologist) thinks of the situation.  Please keep us updated.  You can always send me a message if you have any questions :)

[Me2mommy2b]

Most of my parents to autistic children report the opposite.  They never report delay in expressive language.  On the contrary, they report that the child was very verbal and just lost all of their expressive language at a certain point (usually after 2) and that's a huge red flag.  

[JoyRenee]

Amber, I didn't realize you had two older children. THAT makes a huge difference because they are definitely talking for him. Also, EVERY CHILD is different and should not be treated as "text book". Meaning what you read is only based on average or above average children's abilities. Your child still has a LOT of growing to do and the 2nd year of their life is when their verbal skills flourish.

That is why your ped. is not concerned. If he's closer to 2.5-3 yrs old and still doing the same or slightly better is when he needs to be evaluated. Sounds like he's just an energetic little boy, all-too-happy to have his older sibs speak up for him! LOL!

[Crritter]

Wow, my nephew would not communicate much at all, no expression, that's what kinda tipped them off to the autism, he's very withdrawn and as a baby very laid back.  Would grunt some and did get a little expressive and excited some, not much though.  He's been in intensive therapy and goes to a special education school that has really helped him.  He still almost sounds like a deaf persaon when he talks, his speech is a little distorted and can be hard to understand, but getting there.  His little sis started there too this past year and is also working on speech as well as social interaction.  I know the ped they first saw before moving had told my sis they just needed to talk to their kids more and put them in front of a tv to show them how to interact.  Now that's all they do is take the little tv everywhere.  At least they are on track now.

[have 2 kids]

We had this with our son.   He had alot of ear infections as an infant requiring 4 sets of tubes.  He also has an older sibling.  She would always talk for him.  You need to talk to the older siblings and get them to understand that they need to let him talk.   This will take some time and alot of reminding but he will start talking on his own.   When he would indicate he wanted a drink we would say do you want milk?  Say milk, etc.  Within wks we noticed a huge difference.  

[have 2 kids]

We had this with our son.   He had alot of ear infections as an infant requiring 4 sets of tubes.  He also has an older sibling.  She would always talk for him.  You need to talk to the older siblings and get them to understand that they need to let him talk.   This will take some time and alot of reminding but he will start talking on his own.   When he would indicate he wanted a drink we would say do you want milk?  Say milk, etc.  Within wks we noticed a huge difference.  

[amberd5191]

He has had a ton of ear infections as well I'm not sure why I didn't think to mention that, actually he has a double ear infection right now. I did get the referral today and mailed it out so I guess now I just wait for them to call to schedule the evaluation. Thanks for the tip, I will start doing this right away :)