Am I wrong for not wanting to breastfeed?

[mekkah04]

Hey ladies, I wanted to know am I wrong for not wanting to breastfeed. I am very heavy up top, and I think my breasts have grown since I have been pregnant but I can't really tell. But so far I am a 44DD. And EVERYONE wants me to breastfeed because I am so large up top, mind you I have always been this way. I think I just increased maybe one bra size. But anyway, I have co workers asking me, and they are like why? Why wouldn't you? Its healthy blah blah blah. But if its my choice why should it matter? right? I mean I have read ALL of the pamphlets all of the books, but I just don't want to. I don't think its a matter of whether or not I am afraid. It just that its my choice. I even have my WIC counselor asking me why, and she kept telling me its just something to think about. Am I wrong for not wanting to breastfeed?

[mom662]

You are not wrong. I think you should do whatever you feel comfortable doing. I chose not  to breast feed to, and my baby is just as healthy as as breastfeed baby.

[AnnieBrooke]

It is unarguably better for the baby.  But it sounds like you are saying that by your way of thinking it would not be better for the mommy.  If you are uninterested in doing it because you think it will make your breasts bigger than pregnancy breasts, well, at your size it probably won't.  If you are uninterested for reasons of convenience, as a person who both feeds from the breast and from the bottle, bottles are a lot less convenient than the breast.  (And don't let me get started on the issue of cost!  LOL)  But it is your body and your call.

[AndiJ78]

Breast is best, but I agree with Annie, given your chest size as is, it won't make much difference. I am on baby #3 nursing exclusively and did not get much bigger and have stuck in the D-DD range with this one. Mind you when i started having babies I was a full B and in between have gone back down to a full C. In fact many women I know have actually ended up with smaller breasts after nursing.

But if you don't want to, you don't want to.

[shelzyx]

If you don't feel comfortable DON'T do it.... The baby will feel that your uncomfortable and you will probably dry up or not let the milk come down any ways. You know what is best so go with what you want don't listen to everyone else as long as you feel your doing the right thing it has nothing to do with anyone else...
After all........................ MOM KNOWS BEST!!!!!!!!!!

[pertykitty]

while either way is great however you decided, the formula isnt 100% equal to breastmilk. i dont want to start a fight about breastfeeding, god knows we have had those, but to give you the info correctly. like i said, its your choice and nobody should condem you. but it is not nor will it ever be equal to.

[Darkestlight]

even before the realization that I couldn't breast feed cause of medicine I have to take for some reason I didn't want to. Everyone would ask me why and I don't know. It's just something I don't want to do. So I understand and don't think you are a bad person for it.

[pertykitty]

when i was pg with my son the thought of breastfeeding sounded odd. something sucking on my boob?? but i tell you im glad i did. it was the best and i cant wait i will bf with this baby too. its just a great bonding experience plus the fact they get something they cant get from formula. it ok with whatever choice you make, i just thought id let you know i felt uncomfortable with it too before i did.

[surprisebaby]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with not wanting to breastfeed your baby.  Formula is a 100% healthy alternative.   It is a very personal decision, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with chosing to formula feed your baby.  Bottle Feeding/ Breast Feeding have their pros and cons, and it is a decision that you need to make on your own.  Breast feeding can be just as inconvenient, if not more at times.  I was not comfortable to whip out my 38DD to breastfeed my babies in public places.  I don't like to be the centre of attention.  So I chose to supplement with formula for convience.  Whatever you decide is Right for your baby!

[surprisebaby]

way to start things going again...why would you start this?  formula is perfectly fine alternative to breastmilk.  a good friend ONLY  breastfed 1of 3 and that one child that was breastfed had a brain tumour!  so nothing can stop the absolute worse nightmare you can possibly even begin to imagine in your wildest dreams;  not even breast milk.  again to the original poster...pertykitty just likes to stir the pot with me...formula is nothing to feel guilty about!  do what is best for you! ignore her rants...they are aimed at me...not you!  pertykitty-shame on you!  you have already said your peice.  i see  you are making new friends in this forum.  judging people about their age and how their parenting skills are based on age. did i let it go- you betcha..not interested in starting anything more with you.  you got nothin better to do?  you always say how emotional you are...that's a line and a half. you NEVER want to start anything.....BULLSH.IT!

we all KNOW the pros of breastfeeding, but baby will be 100% fine with either choice...100%%%%%%!!!!!!!!! THIS PIS.SES me off because of what i am helping my good friend through right now....GUILT! she should have NONE...but people like you who want to insist that "this or that" wasn't as healthy as "this or that"  makes a person (such as original poster) feel like ****!  so let it go.....

[surprisebaby]

Never did I say breast milk was 100% as good as formula...I said it was 100%%%%%%%%% "HEALTHY" alternative!!!!  Don't play with my words!

[Me2mommy2b]

I'm one of those women whose breasts actually got smaller after b/f.  I would say it's a very personal choice.  It's really up to you to decide what's best for your baby and no one has the right to question your choice (i.e., your coworkers).  Good luck in making your decision.

[nikkicole827]

I'm goign to go with the flow.  I'm going to try breast feeding and if it's not working out, I will switch to formula.  Really, it's no one's business what you decide.  Either way your baby will be healthy as long as he/she is eating some sort of nutritional milk/formula.  

[fitzy11]

you are not wrong for no wanting to breastfeed.  i felt the exact same way as you.  i did not want to breastfeed and i too have a bigger chest. i felt like people especially expected me to b/f because of this. like i was not utilizing my "biggest" resource. and that is just retarted b/c it does not mean you will produce more milk. anyway, in my 8th month i decided i would try it. not b/c i felt pressure at all. it was mostly a financial issue. i know that sounds terrible, but i was planning on staying home and i could not justify spending so much on formula when i was a) not bringing in an income anymore, and b) going to be home with my baby, and able to breastfeed without the stress of going back to work, pumping, etc. i'm happy with my decision, but what i am trying to say is that i understand how you feel. i  was always self conscious of my chest size so why would i want to bring so much attention to it by breastfeeding? and forget trying to find a good nursing bra!!! all that matters is that you are comfortable with your decision. if you want the best of both worlds, i know people who just nursed for the 1st 2 weeks. they say even that little amount of time is beneficial. anyway, breastfed or formula fed, enjoy your little one!!

[pertykitty]

people never take the time to read what i write. i said its and i quote, ok to feed a baby either way. see i said it was ok. i however wanted to add that it wasnt the same. you can feed a million babies formula instead of breastmilk and yes i bet they turn out just as healthy. i was giving the facts, medical and scientific facts, not the facts a mother believes. jeez read it again!! and for the record you contradicted yourself. read that over too. my god some of you women need to get off your high horse and listen to what others have to say. hey if your friend feels guilty or any woman for that matter, its something she has to figure out herself, its not others making her feel that way. you have to learn to be tough and stand your ground when you are a mother.

[pertykitty]

Breast milk is the most complete form of nutrition for infants. A mother's milk has just the right amount of fat, sugar, water, and protein that is needed for a baby's growth and development. Most babies find it easier to digest breast milk than they do formula.

As a result, breastfed infants grow exactly the way they should. They tend to gain less unnecessary weight and to be leaner. This may result in being less overweight later in life.

Premature babies do better when breastfed compared to premature babies who are fed formula.

Breastfed babies score slightly higher on IQ tests, especially babies who were born pre-maturely

this is one bit of info, it gives a baby things formula just cant. my sister fed her babies on formula, it just wasnt her thing. i didnt tell her she was bad. i didnt tell anyone anything. my son had breastmilk and formula after 8 weeks, i couldnt pump at work. poster if you read any of my words you will see, i am not trying to  make you go either way other than to offer information. i tried to give you the thoughts i had before, and how maybe should you even think about it, you might try it. but if you dont never did i say a thing. some people here dont like me because i speak the truth and i have to correct incorrect info at times.

[ajemmom]

I don't think you are "wrong" not to want to BF your baby...it is a personal choice.  Just go into it with an open mind.  Don't completely rule anything out, because as the saying goes, "A baby changes everything."  While I was pregnant with my first, I new I wanted to try to BF, but if it wasn't going well, or whatever the problem may be, I told myself it would be okay to quit and switch to formula.  I was raised on formula, and I consider myself a pretty smart person who did very well on tests!  After my daughter was born though, I didn't want to do anything but breastfeed her!  It was such a special time between to two of us, and it was incredibly hard (she wasn't all that great of a sucker), but I did BF her for 8 months.  Like I said before, it's your choice, and either choice is okay, after all, you are that baby's mother and no one but you knows what's best for him/her.  Just go into the whole situation with an open mind, because you never know how your thoughts might change once you are holding your baby.  BTW, I'm one of those women whose breasts shrunk after BF.  Before pregnancy I was a 36C....during BF I was a 40DD and now I am a 36B!  Go figure!  I think I could open my own bra shop with all the different sized I own!

[AndiJ78]

While it may be difficult for some to believe, I was actually creeped out by breastfeeding before i had Jonathan. I never could see myself doing it, it just didn't emulate how i was raised. But, I had a friend who chose to do it when she had her first. Add to that, ym OB asked me during a visit what i planne don doing or if i had thought about it, my husband spoke up and gave his thoguhts on nursing. I was quite surprised as I was stunned to have a husband so supportive. I listened carefully to those around me, knew the benefits and thought i would give it a shot. I figured I would set small goals, 1 week, 1 month, 3 months, 6 months, 8 months, and then a year.

I was warned that the first week would be hell and it was all three times. But after that first week and despite some other issues with mastitis and a problem with my right breast not working properly, I have successfully nursed all my kids. My first was nursed for 14 mos, my second for 15 mos, and my third is 7 months old and going strong. I managed to have sumo babies depsite the issues I overcame and they are healthy as can be today.

Had i gone with my initial instincts, I would have missed out on this great connection with my kids. And with each baby it has become much easier to nurse in public. With my first, i did it only during a trip that involved flying. With my second I was a little more open, and with my third I will nurse anywhere, anytime I know how to conceal my breast and in many cases those around don't even know what is going on. I am polite and will ask if they mind if i nurse around them, never have I had anyone say "No" I even nursed during the signing of the papers whenw e bought our home. She was very supportive and very accomodating, holding my papers down so I could sign one-handed ; )

Again, this is a personal decision. But keep an open mind. Just as with labor and planning for that, things rarely go according to your initial expectations.

[surprisebaby]

Well said!  The question was about whether or not she should feel guilty about not wanting to breastfeed, and your story that you shared, will by far, help her make her personal decision.
Perty Kitty-perhaps you should take your own advice and READ THE QUESTION!

[have 2 kids]

No, you shouldn't feel guilty about not wanting to  bf.  
When I was pregnant with my 1st I  did not want to bf, even when everyone around me was saying I should.  We used formula and had no problems.  
With my 2nd , I decided to bf because it was a very difficult pregnancy and he was born at 37 wks.  But it didn't work out - my son had a very rare allergic reaction to my milk and we switched to formula.
Do what you are comfortable with and don't worry what everyone else thinks.

[mom627]

I exclusively breast fed my son for 4 months, then weaned him to formula so I could go back to work.  I travel frequently, so pumping and storing milk was very inconvenient.  I felt guilty about giving it up so soon, but it was the best choice for us all around.  My sister breast fed all her kids for 12 months, and one of them is obese!  The other is very small for her age, so I'm not sure breast feeding is 100% fullproof.  It's a personal choice you make, and do what's best for you.  
**ALSO*** my boobs SHRUNK a whole cup size and looked saggy after I was done breast feeding!  It sucked!!!