Anxiuos about Labor and Recovery

I just wanted to hear some of your stories as to how hard is was to adjust to being a new mom. I am more worried about everything after labor and delivery more so than labor and delivery itself. I have questions such as having and recovering from an episiotomy or from tearing,how bad is it? is it really painful when your milk comes in? how hard is it to breastfeed when it is your first time trying? any useful tricks or tips to make becoming a new mommy are appreciated! I have stocked up on toiletries and pretty much anything you can think of since it always sounds like the new mom is stuck inside the house for at least the first week or two. Any truth to this?
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[jgirl34]

Girl I was shoppin in 3 days!! Seriously I had no problems at all!! I had no tearing either. I've had 3 and all three I didn't have any stitches. I felt great right after I had them. Got up and took a shower after about 45 minutes of rest. Got all freshened up and spent time with the new little one and family. Wehn my milk came in I can say yes it was sore but... when I would hold the baby close to me it would help some of the milk come out and it would feel so much better. I did not breastfeed, I tried but it hurt way to bad! Other than that everything was great. My recovery was awesome. I am due in 17 weeks and am hoping this one goes the same. Good luck to you I hope you have a easy labor, delivery, and recovery and a happy and healthy baby!! :)

[ni-ki]

ok speaking of the milk. When exactly does that come? Or when exactly do your breasts start leaking i am still waiting and giving birth tomorrow and thinking that the milk won't be there

[jgirl34]

My milk came in with my boys like 2 weeks before..the colostrum actually which is the first part of the milk. With my girl my oldest it came in almost right away! Sometimes it may take a couple days to a week. You will just give her bottles until then! Good luck.

[AndiJ78]

With my first I had a rough go of it, but he was a bigger baby than we expected and the delivery went a little crazy. I had a 4rd degree episiotomy and recovering from that took a long time. With the exception of the first night home, things went smooth. I waited too long to feed him as I was in "mommy mode" and trying to set things up, I had some engorgement and it was tough to get him to latch. With some manual milk expression to loosen things up, he latched on and away we went. The first week of nursing is the hardest, even with a proper latch you can and will be sore, but once you get past the first few seconds of each session, it goes really smoothly. Despite the disconfort of the episiotomy, I was still out and about within that first week showing off my little munchkin.

Now with my second, I spent less than 24 hours in the hospital and the day after we got home I was out shopping with baby in tow and a few days later was taking him with me for my finals and a presentation at school. I still had the discomfort that came with nursing that first week, but I bought a head of cabbage and would place cool cabbage leaves on my breasts in between nursing sessions if I was feeling sore.

Everyone handles labor and delivery differently. I was so nervous with my first, didn't know what to expect pain wise and things were crazy. He was big, got stuck, and due to the recently dosed epidural, I wasn't pushing effectively. With my second, I went med free for the delivery and it was way easier. I would never suggest a first timer go without help, but let the epidural wear off at the end so you can get into the groove with the contractions and really feel the need to push. My second was out in 14 pushes whereas my first took 3 hours of pushing.

I don't know that anything we say can help ease your anxiety, but know that no matter crazy it could get, in the end, you will have a beautiful baby to show for it. After my first I was so worried about the delivery with my second, after his went so smooth, I look forward to deliverying my third. Make sure you have a good support person there with you. My mom can ground me like no one else in the world, so having her literally in my face walking me through it really helped. And for goodness sakes, make sure you get some food!! With my first the nurse I had in the morning refused to let me eat so after going more than 24 hours without food it was no wonder i was unable to push effectively! With my youngest I ate a full breakfast and felt like superwoman!!

You will be fine, you have an entire website full of women here to help you post pardum ; )

Andi

[pmom]

Well the adjustment of being a new mom is not always pleasant but it is the best job in the world. As for labor I have had 4 kids and all but my first was induced and I had very long labors with the last 3, but even with that I was up and moving after a couple of hours. I did have have stitches with my 2nd but I only had minor tears and the only reason I had stitches was so that going to the bathroom was a little less painful. It only hurt for a few but it is worth it even if you only have minor tears like me, I got those tears with my first and the doctor didn't think i needed stitches and I have to say that peeing was a painful task. Anyway good luck to you and take your time resting while you can casue trust me you will need it.
Tiffany

[AndiJ78]

That was meant to be a 3rd degree,lol.

I agree, every new experience as a new mom can be a little scary, but well worth it. Not the creepy axe murderer scary, but that good butterfly in your stomach scary. In time you will get into the groove of things and look back and wonder what you were so worried about ; )

Andi

[lib and jrs mom]

nursing the baby can be a little overwhelming it seems.  it's not comfortable the first week or two but well worth it.
i nursed my 2nd exclusively, never had any formula ever, but it was a lot of work.  i agree with the previous posters.  you need to start nursing as soon as you can and if you intend to nurse exclusively try to stay away from bottles and pacifiers.  it can make it more difficult for the baby to latch on because they get to where they don't want all the work of getting the breastmilk.  it is a lot of work and takes a lot of commitment.  my son never had colic, never had constipation, spit up rarely, is in the perfect range for his age, and very close to his mommy.  i know everyone isn't the same, so good luck on the new journey you and your little one are about to begin.

[npd]

Your breasts start producing (and leaking) colostrum (the thick, yellowish pre-milk) after about 16-18 weeks of pregnancy.  But your milk won't 'come in' until 1-3 days after the baby is born.  Which is just fine, because the colostrum is enough for them until then - they'll still get about a teaspoon at each feeding, which is all they need for those first couple of days.  I wouldn't suggest introducing a bottle or pacifier in the meantime if you intend to breast-feed exclusively... your milk supply will be much better if you nurse every couple of hours for those first few days.  One trick to help deal with engorgement (i.e. hard, full breasts when milk comes in) that we only found out about with our 2nd baby is to soak two newborn diapers in very warm/hot water, and put one on each bare breast to relieve some of the pain - it REALLY helps.  Good luck!

[Counting Days]

I agree with npd regarding not introducing bottles if you intend to breastfeed.  The colostrum is enough for your little one until your milk comes in (for me it was 4 days post-partum both times).
It is painful at first, but with consistency and love, you will be natural at it in no time.

Regarding stitches - I opted to not have an episiotomy with my second (we specifically asked the doctor not to cut).  I had a 2nd degree tear which she stitched afterward (my daughter was 10 pounds 2 oz.), but I didn't mind - I thought that was better than having an episiotomy.  It was sore for a while - but the sitz baths are awesome.  They also should give you witch hazel pads you can use for the first few weeks - that really helped me.  They gave me stool softeners because at 1 week post-partum I had not had a bowel movement (I was scared to because I thought it would hurt).  I took the stool softners a few times, but since I was nursing, I also noticed they were affecting my daughter's stool too, so I quit taking them.  About 2 days later I had a b.m., and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

Like someone else said - everyone is different.  What happened to some may be completely different to another!

[Zoey05]

I was stuck in the house at all, my daughter will be 6 months tomorrow. I did have stiches 15 actually and that was from tearing!! I would be lying if I said that it didnt bother me at all but it was bareable!! You are a woman this come natural for you no worries! You will be fine

[1twinmom]

my best advice to you is don't be afraid to ask for help from ANYONE who is willing and SLEEP WHENEVER possible. You may feel a "high" once you bring your baby home and feel like supermom but sleep even though you think you're doing okay without. I had no problem with my episiotomy. Wasn't really that sore but maybe because the second twin was born C-section and that is what took my mind off my other parts!