Fussy Babies (PLEASE,PLEASE HELP)

Hey ladies I am about to lose my mind I want to know if it's normal for babies to cry for no apparent reason? I have noticed that my twins cry so much that I feel that I'm doing something wrong. I check to see if their diapers are dirty or wet, I feed them, I burp them I mean I do everything that you might think is wrong with them and sometimes nothing i try to put them on their bouncers or swing and they don't want that either. I carry them and they don't want that until they eventually settle down and this is almost everyday sometimes it is in the morning, afternoon or night. Lately they also get fussy after their feeding we burp them and give them an extra ounce just to see if they might still be hungry and sometimes it's not even that. I feel like if I'm going to lose it I don't know what else to do with for them.  Also when they do fall asleep they are constantly waking up and falling asleep cry fall asleep I mean they have a really bad sleeping pattern, Only at night is when they get to sleep without constantly waking up. I also bought the mylicon drops to see if is gas that they have and that really hasn't helped so I guess it's not gas. So please ladies help me.

[sfritz]

It sounds like they might have colic. I found information on this website about it. You can also google it and see if you can find any more information.
http://hcd2.bupa.co.uk/fact_sheets/Mosby_factsheets/infant_colic.html#2

It isn't anything that you are doing. Sorry I can't be of more help and Good luck!!

[orphanannie59]

Oh I feel for you so much.  I can't imagine having two that you can't get to calm down.  You sound really stressed, and I don't blame you.  Just remember this fussiness will not last forever.  I am sure there will be many good suggestions for you from the ladies on here that have gone through it.  It has been a long time since I had a new baby, so I am not much help to you.  I just wanted to tell you I am thinking of you.  Take a couple of deep breaths.  Let someone take care of them while you take a long hot bath.  If you stress they feel it, and it could be making them worse. Take care of yourself.

[Tanker Chic]

I bought a book about healthy sleeping habits for babies.  It is up stairs.  I will forward the title later if you are interested.  Anyway, the book says it is natural for babies to become increasingly fussy until about six weeks and then they start to calm down.  It says it is due to an uninhibited nervous system and that 80% of babies will calm down around 6 weeks afer their due date.  

The book also talks alot about how mothers will tend to thier babies as soon as they start fussing and this actually interrupts their sleeping pattern and causes them to become overtired.  It says prior to 6wks the objective of the mother is to bring the infant comfort and security so you shouldn't let them "cry it out" but just because they are fussing you don't have to run to pick them up... wait and see if it develops into a real awake cry.  Often the fussing is just an active stage of sleep.  

Also, I have not been using a pacifier because people advised me not to.. but yesterday I brought it out to see if I could get Jacob to settle down so I could sit down and eat.. it worked like a charm.  So don't feel bad about using them, especially with twins.

Good luck to you.  

[AndiJ78]

Sometimes babies cry just to cry and holding and comforting may be what it takes to soothe them. They spend 9 mos nice and cozy in the womb, it takes some time to get used to the big change.

[KellyTexas]

YOU ARE NOT ALONE MY FRIEND!!!!  I too have both boys screaming and crying all day while daddy is at work.  The minute daddy gets home, they seem to settle down.  He looks at me and says "what's so hard about doing this all day?"  He's lucky he says it with a smile or I'd kick his you know what.  

I have tried everything just like you but to no avail.  It's driving me crazy so I know how you feel.  If you figure anything out, let me know.  At least yours calm down at night - we are up almost all night as well with the boys.  They just don't sleep very good.  Any thoughts on that ladies?  Our ped doesn't want us using any rice cereal until they are 16 weeks - I see no sleep in my near future!!  :(

[Crritter]

Oh, it's so tough.  I have been through colic twice, and at times we would be up walking the floor all night and I would start to cry with them.  Colic shows up usually at night, but Andi is right, they have been all snug and cuddled up, plus they were close together, it's all new.  If they are so fussy right after eating, or if they are waking up from a sleep crying, could very well be what they are eating is not agreeing with them or they have acid reflux.  I would watch for a pattern and see when they are fussy, is it all the time, certain hours, after eating...and call the ped.  Carson was up the entire first night home from the hospital and we were in the office that next am.  He didn't stop till after 4 months.  Cameron was nicer and gave me 2 weeks to the day, then it kicked in.  He would begin to fuss at 8 pm, by 10 pm he was full blown screaming, and it was on and off till 5 am (mostly on) then it would quiet down and he would crash.  He screamed so much he was beginning to lose his voice.  After 3 days and nights of it, I called the nurse in tears and went in that day.  He had reacted to the milk based formula, my breast milk, and soy formula.  They switched him to Nutramigen, which was great for the gas, he ate more as it was so broken down, but I know he felt better.  He was still up alot at night crying and would wake up from a deep sleep screaming and gagging.  He also spit up alot and it was projectile.  After 2 weeks on the new formula they added Prevacid for acid reflux.  They later added more meds after a test showed he was refluxing still out of control and it made a huge difference.  Cam was still pretty crabby and you could tell it was 8 pm without even looking at the clock, it was eerie, almost exactly to the minute and he would begin to cry.  We did get more sleep though and he quit waking up crying.  I think you should track it and talk to your ped about it in more detail.  Sounds like it could very well be acid reflux or a food intolerance.  It will get better in a few months.  I feel so bad for you, I was a wreck with one baby, can't imagine 2.  Also, the cereal will only fill their bellies more and if they are not hungry, wouldn't do anything for them anyway, and they are way too young for it.  I waited till at least 4 months with mine, they need the formula for now.  Hang in there and good luck.

[Logan206]

I also feel you pain...my twins (now 8 months) were very demanding and cried a TON the first few months.  Many people think that twins are so laid back because they are used to sharing mom's attention...that has so NOT been the case for me!!  

If the crying is worse during or after a feeding, it could be a food allergy or reflux.  That was the case with my little ones.  They'd arch their backs when I tried to burp them which is a classic sign.  If the crying is more random, and it's colic, it might just take time.  I'd chat with your doctor to see what s/he thinks.

My kids never napped well, and I really struggled in the beginning trying to get them to sleep, because they'd cry all the time and keep each other awake.  I finally resorted to putting them in their car seats and rocking them to sleep for naps.  Not the best habit, but I was desperate, so that might work for you too.  Also, I was alone with them most of the time, so to carry them around at the same time, I often had one in the bjorn carrier or a sling carrier and would hold the other.  It's tough on your back, I think mine were comforted some by being close to both me and each other.

Try to give yourself a break whenever you can.  If family or friends offer to help out, let them.  I so feel for you as I know it must be so frustrating and exhausting to have two babies crying so much.  Hang in there!

[daisygirl1]

I also feel your pain but there is definitely light at the end of the tunnel.  My DD had colic and got a little better once we put her on soy formula but basically her first three months were pretty awful with constant crying.  Essentially every waking hour that she was not eating, she was crying and often cried mid-feed with gas.  She would nap maybe 20-30 minutes at a clip but then the routine began trying to make her happy, with changing, feeding, entertaining but often without success.

The one thing that actually worked to calm DD down was loud white noise.  She preferred the hair dryer to vacuum but basically it was the only thing that was too loud for her to cry over so she finally gave in and would just relax/fall asleep.  We still use it at 6 months when she needs a little help falling asleep but typically on lower volume now.

If it makes you feel any better, she's actually a really good baby now.   Sleeps through the night, eats like a champ and is very smiley.  They just need to work themselves out in the beginning.  Hang in there b/c it will get better!!!   Good luck!

[JoyRenee]

This will pass!!! Colic usually resolves around 4-6 months old. If it becomes unbearable and you feel yourself "losing it" just put them down in the crib, shut the bedroom door, and go cool off. You are NOT a bad mother if you have to do this. I've had to do it many times. Usually it only took me about 2 minutes of talking to myself to calm down (I'd say things like, "She's just a baby. She's just upset. I am the adult. I just need to hold her and love her.").

If you have a trustworthy neighbor or famly member nearby, call them as well if you feel like losing control. This will pass and this does not mean they'll be awful people when they are older!!!

[K1990]

I have watched two sets of twins and luckly both sets have been very clam and laied back but my cousin had twin boys and they seemed to be very cranky, the doctor just wrote it off on colic or acid reflex.  It has been interesting that I have noticed more crying and fussiness with twins of the same sex, in the ones I have seen anyway.  I'm sure it will all get better.  The twins I currently nanny for, the little boy will often get very over tired and the only way to get him to relax is putting him in his swing with the lights and music from him swing on and putting him in a really dark room.  It works wonders!

[emmaki]

im also suffering sooooooooooooooooo bad you gugs,! have 14 month old identical twin boys, I put them to bed at 7.30pm, (they have 2 short naps in the day) and until 10.30pm they wake up constantly, then they sleep till 2.00am sometimes till 5.00am and then again till 7.00am, im exhausted how can I stop this!!! I dont feed them at any of the wakings as they drink a full bottle before bed and then at 7.00am HELP!!!!

[Hope2OneDay]

My baby was the same way (on and off) for weeks. It turned out that he had reflux.
Here's what we did that made a HUGE difference:

1) The doctor put him on reflux medication (at first it was stuff in a bottle that tasted really yucky and hard to give to him with a syringe) Later, he gave us tablets that we had to cut in half, then dissolve one of the halves in water inside a syringe. This was better b/c it didn't taste nasty. The hardest part was making sure he got all the little "capsules" from the water.

2) We raised the top of his bassinet with a couple of thick, large books. This helped keep the acid reflux from making its way back up and irritating the baby. This worked wonders! It just has to be at a slight angle, so be sure not to overdo it!
If they're in a crib, you can roll a towel or small baby blanket up and stick it under the mattress. Again, be careful with how high you place it.
Another thing we did was let him sleep in his swing (we had the Fisher Price Aquarium swing at first, and later got a Papasan swing, which he took naps in for a LONG time!).

3) We swaddled him in a Swaddler (not just a blanket, because he always broke out of those!). We pretty much did this when he was sleeping in his bassinet exclusively. We put him in between the little triangle wedge things, too. This helped keep him "cozy". Eventually, we even tucked blankets over his feet b/c this made him feel more secure, too.

My baby is now 13 months old, and is just as sensitive as he ever was. He outgrew the reflux by about 3 months old, but he is still sensitive. He hates being alone, and is a little more "needy" than most babies I've seen. Some babies just ARE...

Hope this helps...and good luck!

[Audreyann]

I know how you feel when my oldest was two months old she would cry for 6-9 every night.  I found something in the drug store that might help you I know it did for me and my two other kids.  It is called Colic Pills they are made by Hylands it is all natural.. They also have them for other things like teething and bedwetting and many more...  No I don't work for the company I just know what works and I tell all my friends and anyone else that might need them...  I know they saved me and my kids LOL... Good luck....

[AnnieBrooke]

Try infant probiotics (found at the health food store and in the health food section of fancy grocery stores, often in the refrigerator).  Probiotics do better in blind testing than Mylicon and research out of France says they help the baby's gut do better with digesting food.  Good luck!