I don't want to go to work next week!!

[chellybeans]

if you have taken off a total of 12 weeks then the family medical leave act won't protect you, but if you have not been out for a total of 12 weeks then you are protected usually. the law is that you get 12 weeks unpaid leave and are allowed to return to the same position or a comparable one.

unfortuantely under the same law they can let you go at 12 weeks and 1 day :(

have you reseached that law? also it is not the same if your company employs under 50 people

Ok, most of you know my boss is pressed to have be back at work.  I told her I couldn't come back till Aug 27th and that is only for part-time 10-4 every day.  Still seems to much to me.  Now she wants me back next with and to bring the baby with me.  I just am not ready to go back.  My body is not ready and baby is not ready.  He will only be 8weeks.  I don't understand how the law can not protect me so that I can have my 12weeks off.  I have been will this company for 10years!!  What is five more weeks to that kind of time???  I hate this so much.  I keep thinking that at least I had this much time.  I am going to take him in but I will not work all week next week.  I am just a little sad because of that not to metion I am a fat cow- I am still 164 and a size 12.  A far cry from the 137 size 6.  I am losing every week but it is not fast enough.  I don't want to go!!  I just wish that the law would protect me too.  

[deanne11]

Kris- I feel for you.   I'm so sorry you have to go through this....and bring the baby with you?  What kind of b/s is that????

10 yrs of loyalty means nothing....sorry, but I am at a big corporation and I am protected under the FMLA, 12 weeks of leave act but if my drs have me leave work early...like they are saying....I'm looking at bring my baby to a daycare at 8 weeks as well.....

It is horrible!

[tomel]

I thought they had to give you 12 weeks? Have you looked up in your human resources manual at work what they allow, or looked up the laws for maternity leave in your area?
I dont blame you one bit. I did not want to leave my son, especially cause he cried so much.

[have 2 kids]

I know you want to stay home longer but you need to think in the long term.  You have said you need this job.  They are willing to accomodate you and let you bring in the baby.    You really should give it a try.  When pregnant with my son I was on bedrest for 12 wks.  I had to go back to work fulltime when he was 2 wks old and I had a c-section.    

[ImmortalOne]

The Family Medical Leave Act will cover you for up to 12 weeks, provided you have been with the company for 12 months, worked a certain number of hours in the last year, and the company has a certain amount of employees within a certain radius.  I would look up and see what applies to you and what doesn't.  If you qualify I would simply tell your boss as such and that is what you intend to do now that you have and the opportunity to spend time with your newborn.

Also, have you considered only working part-time at another company?  Perhaps your family can thrive on one income for awhile?  Just an idea.  I so wish I could do these, the DH is looking for a new job and hopefully it will let me be home with Lilith longer when she's born.

[ImmortalOne]

I was a single parent for the better part of 14 years, and raised my first alone from the day she was born.  I'm happy you have a family that is willing to help you out and let you live with them.  Would they be willing to let you work a little less to be with your children?  Perhaps in exchange for cooking/cleaning/rent or something along those lines?  What kind of work do you do that you can bring your baby in?  That is awesome to be honest, I so wish I had that opportunity.  

[tmv]

I had papers signed and agreed upon to return to work from a family leave for 12 weeks. After 7 weeks, I got a call from my supervisor stating that I need to return on the next Monday or my position would be replaced! I didn't return, was not ready. Did not get a lawyer bc of strapped for money anyway. Best wishes to you.

[kris123]

The law does not cover women who work for a company with under 50 people so I am out.  We only have 8.  I am living at my mom and I am a singe parent of two so yes I do need this job.  Maybe I should stop crying about what I want and be thankful of what I do have.  I can only work till 10-4 and I can bring my baby in, I do have my sister to watch him, and my parents.  I guess I just need some support.  i wanted two more weeks I had the money saved to do that.  I don't know and little ryan is still so fussy and colic.

[kris123]

I am lucky to live with my family.  My boss told me I could come in at 10 and leave at 3:30-4 instead of 8:30-5. I live an hour away from work so that cut me down from being gone 10hours a day to 7 or 8.  I am an office manger of a small company in northern virgina.  My duties are answer phone, take orders, enter them, shipping and receiving.  I do everything in the office except pay bills which my boss does.  I am vital to her I guess.  She told me to bring in a swing.  God always said to be thankful for what you do have and not worry about what you don't have.  That way He can give you more because if you can't be happy were you are at how can you be happy with more :-)

[tmv]

You sound more positive now. It is always hard and you doubt what you're doing is the right thing. You are still healing and emotions waver. Take care and it does sound like you are luckier than most with the flexibility of scheduling. You're irreplacable and they appreciate you there, that's another thing to be thankful for. Hang in there!

[pertykitty]

since everyone has covered the work issue let met tell you you are hardly a fat cow.  i know you are not what you were, and you will get back it takes time.  if it took you months to get there it cant come off overnight.  chin up sweety, you have 2 beautiful kids.  you just gave birth a short time ago.  

[brentlie]

I had to come back to work at 6 weeks.  I was still 20lbs heavier than I was before pregancy, I had to come back wearing my matunity clothes!  I also work 1 hour away and have another child.  It is great they are letting you work reduced hours, I don't have that option but I wish I did.  I leave home at 7am and get back at 6pm.  The first few days will be bad then you will get use to it.

[AnnieBrooke]

My baby is 7 months old and I'm still wearing my early maternity pants some of the time.  It's easier than buying anything new for the size I am (exactly between where I was pre-pregnancy and where I was when the baby was born).  

And Kris, I don't want to be a sourpuss, but when you say "I want my 12 weeks," as though someone took something away from you that you owned, please think again.  It's amazing that there even are laws in this country protecting SOME women who have just given birth, given that most lawmakers are men.  

And a small company cannot necessarily afford to give people such a long time off.  They wouldn't have enough extra people to cover for the one who is gone, and would have to hire to replace the position, and might not be in a position to then fire the person.   I used to work for a 4-person company, and one of the employees had a sudden health issue, and it was a BIG DEAL to find coverage for her for 8 weeks!  The little company nearly went under.  A lot of small companies are that close to the red.  So please count your blessings that your boss is trying to work with you.  Taking your baby in might be just fine.

[pertykitty]

not to steal the thread but annie are you sahm now? i know before you worked from home at times, i would LOVE to be able to stay home, but im sure i will have to work some.  but you never know!

[Crritter]

I know it is awful to have to go back.  I knew my son would be okay in his daycare and I had done it before, but  I was still just sick about leaving my baby to go to work.  He was also still crying a lot at night and I was barely getting sleep, only a few hours total, while getting up almost every hour.  I was an exhausted emotional wreck, but once I got there and saw my co-workers and got back into the swing of things it was kinda nice to have everything back to normal.  I still would rather be home, but little Cam is happy to watch the other kids and his big brother is there to watch out for him.  I also feel better not having that end of maternity leave feeling looming over me.  Take a deep breath and know he'll be okay, he'll get to bond some with you sis.  I wish you had more time, but you will both be okay.  Take care and go enjoy the rest of your leave.

[AnnieBrooke]

I'm at home, but still get jobs from my old office (too bad, they knew my fax number so I am stuck LOL).   It's not bad except that it means I sometimes can't go to appointments, since I don't have any regular babysitting.

[anxiousmomtobe?]

Hi honey,

As you know, I am self-employed, I was on  my own in my office with my ds when he was under two weeks old.  It can be done.  

A swing is a great idea....and an exersaucer when the baby is a little older.  My son was pretty happy if he could see me and hear my voice.

A baby sling is great, you can work and hold the baby at the same time.

If you can, take some of the paperwork home to do at night after the baby is asleep.

Make sure you eat well to keep your energy level up.

You are a strong woman and you will get through this.