Lost and confused

I posted over the weekend about possibly being pregnant, and I ended up getting my period. This marked the one year point of trying to conceive. Its been a very hard year, thinking each month that "this time is it" and it never was. I finally had an HSG test done a month ago. Both tubes were blocked and they were able to open the left. All that anticipation and disappointment all for nothing.  

I just don't know if I can handle trying anymore. Its really taking a toll on our marriage and my sanity. The doc suggests Clomid next but I'm not sure I want to go that route.  And my hubby is leaving next week for 6 weeks, which means we loose 3 cycles.  I know I am not old or anything, I will be 28 soon. But its my personal feelings of not wanting to start having kids in my thirties. I feel like I am running out of time. And I am terrified I will end up with an ectopic in my only tube and than we really will be out of luck. We cant afford IVF.  

To add insult to it all, my friend is 8 weeks pregnant and is only 21. She has PCOS, wasn't taking the metformane correctly and wasnt on Clomid - and bham she is pregnant. I am happy for her but it hurts a lot.

Anyone else going through similar situations? How are you coping?  None of my friends are even thinking of having kids, my sister in law got pregnant while on the pill so she doesnt understand.

[LuvBeingAMommy22]

I am sorry to hear what your going through... I can't relate to you in this situation but I just want to tell you not to give up hope... Everything happends for a reason ( Who knows why ) But When it is ment to happen it will... My friend is going through alot too... Aug. 2005 she had a still born at 36 weeks and then Feb.2006 she had a misscarriage so she had to have a D&C well she just found out on Christmas morning that she is Pregnent ( almost 6 weeks ) So that just shows you not to give up hope yet... I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers... Good Luck with everything... Wishing you lots of baby dust

LuvbeingAMommy22

[waiting1977]

Hi I am 29 and I am 7 weeks pregnant - 2nd pregnancy - 1st one ended in m/c earlier this year.  I too have PCOS and I must admit if it wasnt for clomid I wouldnt have gotten pregnant.  In both pregnancies I took clomid for 3 cycles and got pregnant.  I wouldnt hesitate to use it again.  Good luck in your decisions!

[ImmortalOne]

Dear Lost and Confused,

I understand your pain quite a bit.  I am 31 years old, with two children 14 yrs and 9 yrs.  My children are far apart in age because of infertility issues, more over even now my system is so messed up that I might have false positives which make it harder.  I have had 3 miscarriages in the last 9 years.  It drives me nuts that some women can get pregnant so easy, that it's so hard for me and others.  And some people don't care they are at all.  Right now I'm up all night waiting to hear from my doctor about yet again another postive urine test and negative ultrasound.  I completely empathizes with you.  For me, the lack of periods and then the miscarriages made me feel like less of a woman somehow.

[mommyandaidan]

I am so sorry. I can't imagine what you are going through. I know how it has been just the last couple of months ttc, I couldn't imagine what you have gone through. I will be thinking about you.