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SOOOOO frustrating...in-laws!!
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SOOOOO frustrating...in-laws!!

This has nothing to do with pregnancy really but I just need to vent and get some input!!  As most of you know, dh and I just moved back to his old place in the country. I really like it here except for one small problem! His parents, grandparents and sister live within a 1/2 mile radius of us!! Which is fine for the most part, I really like them! My sister in law is one of my best friends (maybe I should say was...we don't spend much time together anymore). If it weren't for her, I'd never have met Jeremy. (I was the maid of honor in her wedding and he was an usher lol) But....they all feel it's ok to just walk in our house when they feel like coming over! It annoys dh too and he's pretty much been flat out rude them about it but they don't get it!  Like a couple weeks ago....when I was sunburnt...we had JUST left his parents house where we saw all of them. Like 10 minutes later (after I'd changed into the shortest, most comfy, sunburn accommodating short shots and Jeremy had gone to bed to get some rest) his 7 year old niece walks right in the door screaming "JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSICA, JEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRREMY!". And following her was my mother in law, sister in law, brother in law and nephew. My niece was being so loud and obnoxious the whole time they were here, my nephew insisted on pinching poor Ruby's little doggie cheeks (he's only 1) and they were just annoying! All the while, I'm hiding my short @ss shorts under a blanket! lol It happens all the time and I'm so tired of it. I don't feel I should have to lock the doors in the middle of the day but being blunt hasn't worked with them.......what the hell do I do!? I told Jeremy....this is not going to fly when I'm trying to nurse my baby and they feel the need to just pop in whenever the heck they feel necessary! *Sigh* I just feel like I need to keep my house cleaner than a museum in case they show up and for crying out loud do they ever stop to think that just maybe their little boy would want to have sex with his very pregnant Shamu sized wife every once in a while?! LOL

Sorry for complaining so much. Just really irritated. (His Grandpa just left and I hid in Max's room to avoid sitting here talking to him. What a b*tch I am, huh?)
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17 Comments Post a Comment
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177988_tn?1266802499
HAHHAHAHAA.  If you are a ***** then so am I!  My husbands father as well as my two sister in laws live within two houses of us.  Also my dh's neice.  his dad is very nice but very ... around... a lot.  Like he comes over at 7 am every sat. and sun. mornign to work on our house.  Don't get me wrong, we couldnt have it better that he is a carpenter and is doing all of this for us for free (we are residing our house) along with the help of my husband but seriously.  He gets my husband up that early and I swear picks whatever room I am in to pound on from the outside.  I ask dh to tell his dad to be mindful that I don't get to sleep well at night between his snoring and my every 10 minute potty break but... yeah.  I just wonder what will be next after the house is sided?  We still have to redo our kitchen and our bathroom so I don't need to wonder lol.  And my neice?  Don't even get me started!  She's alwasy running down here messing wiht my dog (who is totally my princess that I am very over protective of) and tryign to take her outside to play in the front yard.  We have a fenced in back yard mind you... JUST KEEP HER BACK THERE or leave her alone lol.  No I am bitchy!  She's a kid and I'm being mean and I have one on the way!  I never am mean to her... I love her and she's beautiful I just wish she'd leave my dog alone haha.  Can you imagine how it's going to be once we have our babies?  I just know they will walk in on me BFing or something!  And all the time. Grrr!
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177988_tn?1266802499
Father in law was just here... IS here in fact but came over soon after my poor DH got off work to start the pounding.  Anyway, I always call DH in to eat dinner, I don't care how busy they are he has to eat!  Much to my surprise my F.I.L. took up on my offer to eat here.  (He usually ahs already eaten).  I feel like everytime I cook for him it's not good enough!  In fact, I never even ask him how it was but my DH always does and his father says... eeehhhh it was ok.  SERIOUSLY?  I made breakfast for dinner tonight and I guess my sunny side up eggs werent perfect enough or my bacon wasnt crisp enough for him.  HAHAHA.  But DH is veyr worth it and like I said, FIL does a lot for us.  
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Avatar_f_tn
hehehe!  You are so much nicer than me!!!  You'll definitely need to do something when your nursing!  I guess you could make a sign "DO NOT DISTURB....OR ELSE".  Unfortunately, it sounds like you are gonna have to lock your doors!  =(

Good luck and remember, you'll have a sweet angel soon ..................
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Avatar_f_tn
have you said directly to them either knock or you are not welcome? i think it may take that to get them to wake up.  they might be mad for a min but after the baby comes you will be thankful!! lock the doors for now too (i cant imagine being lucky enough to not have your doors locked all times lol). when they ask why you tell them because you dont want guests right now or you dont want people just walking in.  my exhusbands brother did that too.  pissed me off.  dh didnt tell him as directly as i wanted but eventally did when i suggested if he didnt take his butt to his brothers house to live lol.  i agree people should know repsect and their limits.  
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164559_tn?1233711618
People in a rural setting are much more relaxed about just dropping in.  I grew up on a farm and people would pop by anytime.  In the city, that just doesn't happen.  I don't even pop in on my very best friend...

So, decide how much of this you can live with and then have your dh lay down the law.  I agree that you will need to set definite boundaries before the baby comes.
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177465_tn?1288242063
hehe..."perty anxious" that's how I feel right now waiting on Max! lol

Anywho...He's so direct that I am almost embarrassed because he is flat out rude! They laugh him off. You will be happy to know that MIL did ask if she could be present at L&D and I told her "only in the early labor. After that no one is allowed in except Jeremy and my mom if I ask for her. And NO ONE is to come in for an hour after Max is born. We need family bonding time". I was so proud of myslef. I think she thought I was nuts but I don't care.

This whole area is rural. 3000 people in my whole county. lol I don't mind people popping in if we're outside working or if we've talked earlier in the day about them stopping by.......or if they hadn't already been here 800 times! lol

Oh well....the doors are locked for now! I need to go outside to burn the crib box (yes I'm polluting the environment) but don't want to be spotted! lol
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177465_tn?1288242063
lol well ya know...there are sooo many different ways to make sunny side up eggs. I'm sure all the ones he's had elsewhere were just so much better! ha!  My dh's family has a real issue with my eating habits. I hate red meat. I'll eat bacon,  (SIDEBAR.......They just left after pounding on the door and are now calling to leave a message. Jeremy's truck's not here...did it occur to them that we may be out or something?! My gosh) Anyhow...I'll eat bacon, hot dogs, bologna, some chicken....just whatever tastes good. I don't have a reason for not eating it...just don't like it. And I'm a super healthy eater (veggies and fruits for snacks and meals). But they have SUCH an issue with it. I never complain at cookouts and whatnot...just take side dishes and eat them. Of couse someone ALWAYS has to bring up how picky I am. P*sses me off to no end. Oh and my sister in law calls me "Drama Queen". I'm not sure why exactly. She's the one who's now married, but only after calling off 3 other engagements. That's pretty dramatic if you ask me! lol Oh I could go on for days.......
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Avatar_f_tn
haha!! the fire will draw out the ants.  are people really that inconsiderate that they would laugh at him telling them to back off? 3000 people, the whole town would hear me yelling lol. ill pop in when i go to ohio next year and ill set them straight for you lol.  
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Avatar_f_tn
I have the same thing here.  I live in MS, so you know it's rural here.  Just ask Perty, she's heard my complaining about my kids being outside playing and when I go check on them, there's a whole yard full of kids out there and NO ASKED IF THEY COULD COME HERE TO PLAY!!!  Pisses me off so bad!!  And dh's brother knocks now, but real quick and doesn't wait for anyone to open the door...he just comes on in.  He didn't used to knock at all so I guess he's getting better.  I don't keep my door locked all the time now, but I used to.  But, my kids let any/everyone in now, so what's the point?  LOL
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177465_tn?1288242063
Well I must admit now that I really am a *****. My dh got home and like 2 minutes later they were calling to see if "we" (lol i was never gone) were back. He said yeah. They all come (parents, sister, niece, nephew and g-parents) and bring me birthday gifts. How awful am I? lol Oh well....it doesn't make all the other times that they wanted absolutely nothing go away!
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221025_tn?1332558946
Oh crud that brings back memories - my first marriage we lived next to his grandparents, aunt across the street, parents a mile up the road, cousins on either side of us - his grandmother was always trying to help - came home one day to find my fruit of the looms flappin on her clothesline - way tooooo much - lock the door - you gotta for your sanity - I also had to put my foot down and declare that Saturday and Sunday was our only days to spend together and that they were welcome Monday - Friday, but needed to call before coming over on Sat - and Sun.....good luck, you are going to need it....giggle
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Avatar_f_tn
sounds like an episode of everyone loves raymond lol
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134578_tn?1404951303
Hmm.  I live in the country, one of my best friends lives down the road and she never locks her door.  I knock and walk in.  If she did lock her door, I would wait at the door after knocking (of course, if it was locked I would have no choice, but I mean I would just take it as a signal that this is how she wants it), and wouldn't be offended.  So maybe locking the door isn't the big insult that you think it might be.  And it would help your frazzled nerves for sure.
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164559_tn?1233711618
Happy belated B-day by the way.....

I would highly recommend not having your mil in L & D at all.  With my ds I had relatives running in and out the whole time.  My mother (country woman) already was talking about how they were all coming this time and I said, "NO!!, we do not want anyone there until the baby is a couple of hours old and I have had time to nurse."  They let the whole family in before they even stitched me up (over 30 stitches)  I didn't even get to hold him until he was  2 hours old.  I want peace and quiet this time.  I felt like I just gave birth on hee haw.
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177465_tn?1288242063
lol I don't feel that I'm insulting them by locking the door. I feel like I'm being held prisoner in my own home by locking the door. I like to have it open and be able to just use the screen door, Oh well, I guess. lol

I am TOTALLY not letting her in L&D! No way, no how...NOT happening. I like her, I really do. They're great people but there are some things that your husband's parents just don't need to see! I don't really care if they like it or not. They've got to learn to do things my way when it comes to my own family! I have a feeling I'm going to end up being psycho b*tch once Max gets here. Last night I blew up becuase my dog nipped at our niece. ONLY after our niece (who's 7 and knows better) kept grabbing her by the ears when she thought no one was looking. My  husband hit Ruby so hard and I just blew up. I'm like "WELL if Cloey would keep her hands to herself and not be mean to my dog everytime she's here then Ruby wouldn't bite her!" I mean seriously....that's the only time she's ever gotten aggressive and she didn't even get her. She just snapped at her and I don't blame her!! There are days I'd like to snap my teeth at the kid! lol So I'm sure I'll be super protective when it comes to Max and his cousins! lol

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177465_tn?1288242063
lol I don't feel that I'm insulting them by locking the door. I feel like I'm being held prisoner in my own home by locking the door. I like to have it open and be able to just use the screen door, Oh well, I guess. lol

I am TOTALLY not letting her in L&D! No way, no how...NOT happening. I like her, I really do. They're great people but there are some things that your husband's parents just don't need to see! I don't really care if they like it or not. They've got to learn to do things my way when it comes to my own family! I have a feeling I'm going to end up being psycho b*tch once Max gets here. Last night I blew up becuase my dog nipped at our niece. ONLY after our niece (who's 7 and knows better) kept grabbing her by the ears when she thought no one was looking. My  husband hit Ruby so hard and I just blew up. I'm like "WELL if Cloey would keep her hands to herself and not be mean to my dog everytime she's here then Ruby wouldn't bite her!" I mean seriously....that's the only time she's ever gotten aggressive and she didn't even get her. She just snapped at her and I don't blame her!! There are days I'd like to snap my teeth at the kid! lol So I'm sure I'll be super protective when it comes to Max and his cousins! lol

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177988_tn?1266802499
LOL, I guess I'm not the only one with the dog issue and I'm not the only one who wonders how it's going to leak over to the baby!  My neice is okay... she could be better behaved but she's not awful.  The thing is there are a couple of other kids in my DH's family (close famliy) that are TERRORS!  These two girls were here once when my one year old neice was and they were like trying to pick her up and poke at her with a stick in the yard!  First of all, she is WAY to chubby for these girls to be trying to hold, and second of all they are too young to be holding her anyway at 4 and 7 unless they are on the floor of a house and supervised.  You don't just walk up and pick her up!  OMG they are so goign to try to do that with my little baby when she's tiny and I'm just going to go into ***** mode!  The main problem is that the girls' parents should know better but they just don't pay attention and let their kids run around like animals!  Grr!
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