Stress and ttc? OPEN

[colleen831]

Hi
I was just wondering if people would be interested in just telling me a little about their experiences in ttc.  Have you successfully concieved?  When you did do you remember if you were anxious b/c it was taking so long? Were you under a lot of stress due to children, work, ex's etc? I myself am a worrier and I have had a lot of stress to deal with in my daily life and ttc just adds to it.  I'm not someone who says if it happens it happens. I want to read up on it as much as I can to help myself with ttc and I will eat, sleep and breath this until it happens I don't know how to relax about it.  I've tried yoga and it works for about an hour after a class and then I'm right back to where I was before.  I'm frustrated b/c my dh and I are foster parents as well and some of these people who have kids in care keep producing more and more kids.  How? They are doing drugs, in abusive relationships, have kids in foster care and usually have no money or job to speak of now that has got to be stressful and yet even though they are not focused on ttc they must have a lot of stress.  I've read a lot of conflicting articles about stress and ttc and I felt the only way to find out for sure was to ask real people who have been through it.  So any insight would be helpful.  

[pixijal]

I was EXTREMELY obsessed w/TTC.  It became a chore.  I tried clomid, taking baby aspirin, had the hsg, sperm analysis, progesterone, saw a fertility specialist after 6 months....the list goes on.

After about 20 months (about 2 years)....I took a promotion at work, and gave up TTC, as it was STRESSING us out!  Within 3 months, I was pregnant....and am currently pg for the 4th time.  

I never (obviously) had a problem physically getting pregnant, but I physced myself out of it.  I think the power of the mind had taken over on this one.  I never even got pg on the fertility drugs.  Now, I am pg for the 4th time, and my oldest is only 5.  I am no spring chicken either, I am 34 now.

[Jenny100]

I tried to conceive for over a year, and during that time I was NOT really stressed or obsessive about it. I got pregnant, then lost it at 16 weeks.

THEN--I got VERY stressed and obsessive about getting pregnant again. I know now I wanted to repleace my despair with something happy and hopeful, so I became obsessed with getting pregnant as soon as possible.
This time, it took 3 months.
I worried so much that my high level of stress about it would cause me NOT to get pregnant, but I was VERY stressed about it and DID get pregnant.

So I know it isn't always true that being obsessive and stressed about it will cause you not to be able to conceive. I was one of the most stressed women you could have met, and I did conceive.
I too am not one who can relax and say "If it happens it happens".

Best of luck to you....I feel for you; I've been there.

[breezyjeans]

I, myself am ttc. I was recently pregnant, lost the baby at 10 weeks, but got pregnant right away. I was not stressed about ttc at that time. In fact, it came as a bit of a surprise. On the other hand, my sister was obsessed about ttc and it took her over a year for her first baby. I also have several friends that had a really hard time conceiving, who were all really obsessed with becoming parents soon, as they were getting older. As soon as they chilled out about it and stopped actively trying (i.e., checking basal temps, etc...) 2 out of 3 of my friends got pregnant right away. I am a firm beliver that stress causes chemical changes in your body, so it's best to just let it happen in it's own time. Hope that helps. Just let it flow... Good luck!!

[colleen831]

Thanks for all the insight guys!! It really helps.  I am 36 and I think that is my biggest worry of all.  Every month that passes I know I'm getting older and I know that hurts my chances even more.  I do have 2 dd's already (16 and 12) but its been sooo long.  It took me nine months with my second one to concieve don't know why.  I now seem to have an lp defect.  At around 8 dpo I spot one spot of red or brown blood and on 9 dpo I spot some more and by 10 dpo af arrives. Not enough time to implant.  This is my first try on progesterone gel I started it yesterday.  I think I'm already out for the month b/c for some reason I've been extremely stressed this month and after my second dose of progesterone I feel VERY irritable I don't know if that's the estrogen or just the stress of ttc, but I feel very moody and tired and irritable today. I also don't even know if I o'd b/c I was supposed use opk's and when I tested + I was to start progesterone 2 days later.  Well, on cd 18 I got a questionable + and kept testing the next 2 days and still wasn't sure so I called the dr and they said to start the progesterone anyway as I probably o'd.  My body says I did.  My ewcm went away on cd 20 and my cervix became very low and pointed as it always does after o.  I'm just nervous as to when I will start af b/c of the progesterone I'm obviously going to start later than normal I just wonder how much later?

[Jenny100]

Just so you know--I am 36 too! We are NOT too old!!!:)