Taking baby to work & babysitter

Ok, me and Ryan have been coming to work for two weeks.  So far it has been ok.  He is doing a lot better with his colic and acid reflux.  Next week I start to leave him with my sister but am going to ask my boss if I can bring him in two days a week - how sould I ask?  I can get done what I need to the other three days he really is not that bad during the day.  I am going to miss him so much when he stays with my sister.  It is so hard to leave him he is only 9w old.

[kris123]

One more question, when do babies hold their head up all the time?

[rubyolivia]

Hey Kris! I'm glad to hear Ryan's colic is getting better.......that mean Mommy is probably feeling better too! :)  

I think that you should just be straight forward with your boss. If she was willing to let you bring him in in the first place, I'm sure she'd be understanding. Just keep in mind, though, that the longer you have him with you...the harder it will be when he HAS to go to a sitter 5 days a week. I know I am making a nightmare for myself because I will be bringing Max to work til he's 4 months old and then I'll have to start leaving him with the sitter while I'm at school. I keep thinking maybe I should send him a day or 2 at a time to the sitter to break myself (and Max) in. I guess we'll see what happens! :)

Good luck with your boss! I think she will seriously be understanding of your needs, especially if you explain to her that you have full intentions of sending him to the sitter full time eventually. You need to break yourself and little Ryan in slowly. :)

[kris123]

Yeap, I know. I am thinking postive now because I can't live my life negtive.  Besides my break in life with come.  How can I have hope is getting where I am going and not enjoy what I have.  Then I would never be happy.  I had my daughter in high school and then it did not bother me to take her to the sitter's I loved her but I guess I was young.  I hate to leave him but at least he will be at home with my parents, sister, and daughter.  I don't even have to take him anywhere.  How cool is that.

[rubyolivia]

Yes, you are very lucky to have your family there for you! :) As am I!! My parents are my bosses, my inlaws (even though they drive me nuts) are right around the corner from our house....I should rarely be at a loss for a sitter. But I'm thinking I'll barely want to use one! lol I think it's great that Ryan will have his big sis around, too! My brother is 8 years younger than me and I loved being able to help take care of him....and he loved me to be there. Even when he was just tiny! It was so rewarding! :)

Once I start back to school my best friend from high school's Mom will be watching Max. She's a mother of 7 awesome kids and I just love her to death! I know she'll do things just as I would if I was with him.

[lynne1276]

You both are very lucky.   I have no idea what I'm going to do with Ayden.  My job is crazy hours and I have no family within 1500 miles of me.  I can't even stand the thought of having to leave him overnight with someone at 6 weeks old.  Even for a c section thats all my doctors office will give me.  I'm pretty sure I'm going to be a bartender for the rest of my life.
Sorry Kris.....didn't mean to steal your post, I'm just getting nervous about what to do myself.
I think Ruby is right,   be straightforward.  If they are letting you take him in now I don't see why a couple days would be a problem.  

[ally76]

Just out of curiousty....dont you girls get maternity leave?  I think you are all from the US right?  Maybe its different there.  I live in Canada and we get 1 year of leave.  

[TonyaB]

Is that one year paid leave?  If so, I'll move to Canada tomorrow!  I know in my state (WA) and probably in most others you have one year of protected FMLA leave that you can use provided you have been with the employer for the required amount of time.  However, that leave is unpaid unless you have vacation or sick time to use.  I guess paid maternity leave may be a benefit from the employer too.  But, if you work for a small company they probably aren't paying for your maternity leave, bummer!

[mslkpage]

Most employers are only required to allow up to 12 weeks leave when you have a baby. And if there are fewer than 10 people at the place of employment, they aren't obligated to even give you that. The healthcare and family benefits in the US suck compared to Canada's.

[daprincess21]

wow! where do you work that you can even bring your kids to work with you? i work at a hospital and thats not even posible.

[rubyolivia]

I could take as much as I want to, but I am choosing to come back after 4 weeks. I work for my mom and dad...he'll be here with me. I can pick and choose my hours and I need the money! I like to shop too much! lol

I thought the norm was 6 weeks maternity leave...that's when all the daycares I worked at started taking newborns was 6 weeks. Law doesn't allow centers to take them any younger, but at 6 weeks they allow it since that is when so many moms go back to work.

[ally76]

We get 1 year paid.  Its about 62 or 65 % of your wage.  Its pretty good.  When I had my first dd it was only 6 months then they changed it to 1 year.

[cutiemama]

Yes, in canada we get 1 year mat leave and if you work for a bigger company, a lot of them will "top up" your mat leave pay so that you will receive 80-100% of your pay for 1 year. Canada's amazing. A little sidenote, we also encourage and embrace breastfeeding here too! Our govt has spent milions on campaigns for breastfeeding. Plus our one year mat leave allows us to nurse our babies for the year the WHO, AAP and CAP recommends. You also never (or rarely) here stories about women being asked to leave public places for breastfeeding. I live in Toronto and women BF everywhere- malls, cafes, restaurants, parks, just about anywhere they are when their babes get hungry. GO Canada!

[ImmortalOne]

I totally understand how you are feeling, I had my eldest DD when I was in high school and it didn't bother me to leave her with sitters or day care or whatever.... With Lilith, knowing I have 8 weeks to be with her (10 if I'm lucky and my vacation time is approved) it is going to kill me to be away.  But alas, we do what we need and they eventually understand, we just hope it doesn't take till they are 30 for that understanding to happen!

[Crritter]

I'm so jealous of the great maternity leave programs.  I wish they would catch up her e in the US, but doubtful.  Anyway, Kris, so glad to hear little Ryan is doing better.  That colic is no fun and the acid reflux makes them so miserable.  I had a hard time leaving mine at daycare.  The first week with Cam I took him 2 days.  Started on a Wed., but worked the evening shift Thurs. and my DH left work early to stay with the boys.  Of course my bad luck, little Cam got RSV in the 2 days he went and I ended up taking the next week off, but work was really understanding as they were still overstaffed and knew I was just getting back into the swing of things, I went back at 10 weeks, then 12 weeks.  He loves it there though, he gets to interact with different people and loves the kids, he's a little social bug like his big brother.  He is rolling, squealing, laughing, and trying to crawl, looks like an inchworm, but gets pretty far.  Just think, a few more months and little Ryan will be all over the place too.  Good luck at work, I hope your boss is understanding, they are right though, it will be tough to break away to leaving him completely at home, but you will get there.  He should be holding his head for interval now and it will getto be more and o=more over time, he's still little.

[Pearl99]

In the US the FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act) forces the employer to allow you to take up to 12 weeks off (yes, unpaid and also you have to cover your insurance payment during that time, no employer subsidy). However, they can't fire you during those 12 weeks and have to save you the same job. It's explained online quite well.  Unfortunately if you go out BEFORE the birth the FMLA covers that too so you start using up your 12 weeks before you even have the baby. It is incredible that with all this talk of "family values" etc. that the US gov't can't guarantee a decent liveable maternity leave. I'm going to spend 8 months with no work (unpaid leave) then go part-time for another 7 months (my husband works). If I could do it for 4 or 5 years and still get my job back I would. But if I don't go back when I said, I'll be fired.  With other 2 children, I was in school which made it much easier to just trade class coverage with other moms I knew in grad school. Maybe if men gave birth things would be different in this country....