I love my son but sometimes I feel very exhausted with him around.For instance, I am sick and tired of his whiny attitude, ruining my sleep over some missing toys that he could not find, crying over missing toys that he could not match to the movie he is watching at the moment, and whiny about which food he is wanting at the moment. Next, he already knows how to wipe his butt, yet he refuses to wipes it. Next, his father is not supportive of being around his son, and leaves him all alone with me. I feel very stressed and I end up yelling, verbally abusing my kid, and hitting him. At the end, it is my fault, and I am not a good mother. I think I may agree with my son's father that I am not fit to be a mother, and should go to prison.
Well, I sure know what it can be like to be with a child who is clinging to your every move and wanting a specific toy that matches the movie he is watching at the moment and crying if he doesn't get it. Kids can be more challenging than you expect, and then if you try to put them off, they can get even more worried and needy. Is there anyone else besides his father, who you say is not supportive of being around his son (I assume you mean the dad doesn't want to take care of the child), that can watch your son for a few hours a day so you can rest and regain some of your balance? A mom (yours or your husband's) or an aunt? There are also some places that offer respite shelter for moms who are overwhelmed, that are day centers with child care so the mom can get a bit of a break.
Are you in a city that has any resources for mothers with children? Do you belong to a church? What of your family is around? How old are you and how old is your son? I don't think you should go to prison, though of course you must not hit a child if you can humanly stop yourself, for his sake and your own. I don't even know if giving full custody to the dad sounds like the most helpful idea, if he can't get behind caring for the boy all the time either. I know the foster system is pretty bad in a lot of places, but do you have friends or relatives who would take the boy in for just a little while so you can get your act together with some counseling?
If you simply feel you have zero resources, please go to a church and talk to the pastor. He or she might well be able to lead you to some places where you can get in with other moms and there is some distraction for your son, where you can go for the day and get some assistance.
Hi don't put yourself in even more stress. Yes at the moment you feel everything is against you but its not. Talking is a great start. Asking advice on here. I agree with the first lady a out finding resourses in your area. I think it sounds like you have delayed or untreated post natal depression. I suffered badly with both my daughter's and I'm glad to say that black time of feeling like an unfit mother is behind me. You are not going to get through this alone you need support, if your sons dad is not supportive and is saying you should be in prison, he should be the first thing out your life for you to find your new life. Talk to a doctor a out how you are feeling and find a friend or family member to help with your son. It's not going to be a quick fix but just remember, one day at a time. Let's get through today. Goodluck mail me any time if you need to let off some steam xx
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