after miscarriage - when to have sex again?

[wannabemom]

My miscarriage happened June 11 (almost 4 weeks now) and I'm still bleeding (on and off). From my HCG level, my doctor says that I could still be bleeding for another 2 weeks.

My husband and I will wait for few cycles to TTC but we want to make love as soon as we can.  When is it safe (from infection) to make love.  Is using a condom safe from infection? Or withdrawal is safer from infection (although not safe for conception).  Any help will do. Thanks.

[babygirl22]

When I had a d&c, they told me not to have sex for at least a week, or until bleeding stopped.  I was still spotting after a week and my dh and I decided to try it, and it hurt - not sure why, but it did.  I was prescribed antibiotics though, to prevent infection.  Did you take any?  Good luck - I know I would be trying it out after that amount of time, but you should maybe ask your doctor.

[wannabemom]

I'm not taking any anti-biotics.
I asked my doctor this morning and she said we can have sex now (even if I'm bleeding on and off). Then I told her my concern about possible infection. Then she said, just wait after 2 more weeks (6 weeks total after first bleeding). I forgot to ask her if it's ok with condom or if it's worse (since some condom has some lubricant and may cause irritation).  My DH has been waiting for a month already and I pity him. I love him and I don't want him to suffer :)

[Angel4JohnnyB]

Hey sweetie,
Don't worry so much about your DH. You need to wait until you are comfortable. If you are worried about infection then maybe it is too soon for ya'll to start making love again. 6 weeks isn't that long for him to wait and if the doc said to go ahead and wait the 6 weeks then that is what you should do.
There are other ways to satisfy him if that is what you are worried about.
Let me tell you though........my DH went an entire year while he was overseas in Afghanistan and will go another year when he deploys this time.
I know you love him and want to please him but he can wait and if he loves you half as much as you seem to love him then he will understand.
By the way, I had sex 4 weeks after giving birth this time and had no problems with infection at all.......with my son 9 years ago I had sex 4 weeks after giving birth and at my 6 week mark I had a UTI, bladder infection and a kidney infection. I don't know if the infections had anything to do with having sex or not but...............just some info for ya.
Good luck!!!!
Vikki

[Kassimom]

Just a thought, but since you had a D&C, it could have hurt because you might have still had some mild bruising up there. Again, just an idea...no that it matters now... but just wanted to put that out there! ;)

[babygirl22]

Never considered that at all.  Good point!