Maternal & Child Community
anyone who has had missed miscarriage
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This patient support community is for discussions relating to breast feeding, childhood disease, colic, child discipline, immunization, lactation, newborn care, post partum depression, Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), and special needs children.

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Avatar_f_tn
2011
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Avatar_f_tn
I am 10 weeks pregnant now and I went to the doctor tues 5/31/11 and had my Sono my doctor said he did not hear a heart beat and the baby stop growing at 7.5 weeks. I am scheduled to have a d&c on Monday 6/6/11. Yes my body still feel sick, life I am pregnant. I annotations bleeding, no cramping, I don't understand.
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Avatar_m_tn
i had a miscarriage back in 2009 only to find myself a week later after I stopped bleeding, pregnant.  I carried that baby to full term, so yes it can happen after miscarriage, and easily.  I am now going through a missed miscarriage, so it totally ***** and am just waiting to decide what to do next.
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Avatar_m_tn
turns out i did not have a missed miscarriage because we found a heartbeat but yesterday the heartbeat stopped and I am now having the miscarriage.  i just hope it all comes out naturally without the need of a d&c.
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi,
To all of you who have lost a baby/babies I am so sorry for your loss and what you have all been through. I apologise for the length of this story but I am still so raw and upset by what I experienced that I need to get it all out so people can understand my story. I was due to have my dating scan on 14/6/2011 I would have been nearly 13 weeks pregnant. I started to get light cramps nothing worrying on the 9/6/2011 and a very small amount of brownish blood again nothing to seem worried about as I was told this was very common at 12 weeks. However come the morning of the 10/6 I saw that it had turned more red in colour but the cramps had stopped. We went to the hospital just to check it out as I just didn't feel it was right. The A&E nurse who was also pregnant and due exactly the same time as me (Xmas Eve) said there was absolutely nothing to worry about and she had experienced this too. So a little more relieved I was just worrying for no reason she sent me for an ultrasound anyway just to "put our minds at rest". My pregnancy had been our 3rd we have already 2 healthy boys 11 and 7 years old. This one had been very different with nausea and extreme tiredness that I had never had with the first 2 pregnancies - but every pregnancy is different and you can't really compare them. I just thought maybe because I was older it was hitting me harder. Anyway we got to the scan and a very abrupt doctor also told us not to worry it would be fine. He does the scan and both myself and my husband could immediately see there was nothing living inside - no fetal heartbeat. We were totally devastated and I went into total shock. My dates were correct I was 12 weeks pregnant and the sac had grown to this size, however the fetus had stopped growing at about 7-8 weeks. I felt totally sick to my stomach that it had been dead inside of me for nearly 5 weeks and I hadn't known. My children had talked to my bump excitedly, I had sworn I had felt the tiniest of flutterings in there only a week before. I then had to endure an internal examination and a swab for testing. Very invasive after we had just had that awful news. We were then told we would have to come back to the hospital on the Monday (3 days later) for a more detailed scan to confirm that the baby had died. There was no support we were just sent home. I can't even recall what I did over that weekend, I remember sitting my boys down and telling them what had happened but after that no recollection of anything. So Monday came around and we went back to the hospital had the detailed scan, had an internal scan also which was just nasty, had it confirmed that the baby had died and then were sent over to the Women's Ward waiting room for an hour sat there like 2 frozen statues with everyone else chatting like normal around us before we were eventually seen by a doctor. We were told we'd had a missed miscarriage, that 2 in 5 pregnancies end in miscarriage, that it was probably down to chromosonal abnormalities. We were given a token miscarriage leaflet to take away and read. We were told there were three options but we could only really choose from 2 because I was already 12 weeks pregnant: we had to either consider medication to induce a mini labour to expel the sac, fetus and placenta OR a surgical procedure D & C - which carried more risks as I had already had 2 previous surgeries and I could end up with more scar tissue building up if I had to have a D & C. So we opted for the medication - I was given a tablet which is exactly the same as an abortion tablet that they said would hopefully kick start my body into miscarrying. We were then sent home again until Wednesday. I had very painful cramps start on Tuesday evening and ended up totally spaced out on strong painkillers. When we went back to the hospital again on Weds we were admitted to the Ward for the day. Same abrupt doctor again - scan, internal examination and then 4 pessaries which he inserted to start the cervix dilating and the womb contracting. He assured me I would miscarry very quickly. He was true to his word 2 hours later I had the worst cramps that I can only describe as labour pains and then I passed the sac, fetus and placenta intact. It was very distressing as we both saw what had come out of me and it is an image that continues to haunt me 2 weeks on from the experience. The ward nurse was lovely she took it away to check it had all come out and came back and confirmed it looked like I had passed it all. Then it all went horribly wrong from that point. What should have been routine ended up a living hell. I continued to bleed heavily and lost so much blood I started to feel faint. The abrupt doctor decided he hadn't quite had enough of examining me so here he goes again internal examination, forceps, swabs right up wiping inside which I can quite frankly say the string of expletives that came out of my mouth were blue. The insensitive idiot then said "I cannot see the sac you haven't miscarried it yet". To which a 2 minute argument ensued with us trying to tell him I had passed it. The nurse came in and told him and he quite indignantly said "I didn't know" and he is the DOCTOR??! Nurse was very cross with him at this point and then I got very hot and sweaty and fainted. I ended up on a drip (the doctor missed my vein the first time and ended up trying for 5 mins to find another one) and with an oxygen mask. 2 general surgeons who were passing the Ward were called in to deal with me and it is lucky they did because I honestly thought I was going to die. My husband was panic stricken at the state of me and how much blood I had lost. They found that a bit of the placenta had lodged in the neck of the womb and was causing me to carry on bleeding so they had to get that out with forceps. They had to give me a drug to stop the bleeding which they injected into the canula, this made me vomit so then they had to give me an anti sickness drug also through the canula. I had 2 bags of fluids pumped back into me, the first was pumped in within 20 minutes and the next bag they allowed to go in more slowly. I was then totally out of it for about 3 hours. They kept coming back in to check on the bleeding which started to ease off. I slowly came back to the land of the living and thankfully didn't have to see the idiot doctor again - he stayed well out of the way. They discharged me the same day and I stumbled out of the hospital holding onto my husband in a complete daze.
Sadmum32 :(
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Avatar_f_tn
There has been no follow up appointment, no proper explanation and totally no after care or support. I can't really fault the nurses or the general surgeons on that ward they did what they could to sort the mess out, but the ward doctor was just totally clinical, uncaring, brutal and rude. It made an already very emotional and distressing experience into an absolutely traumatic event that has deeply effected me and totally traumatised me. I have turned into an insomniac, it is 3.40am and I am still wide awake on the computer whilst the rest of my household is fast asleep. I struggle to go out I am very nervous now of bumping into anyone and having to explain what happened to the 'bump'. I can't watch TV - total lack of concentration and my mind wanders and I start thinking about stuff, and that's not even mentioning how I feel if a baby advert comes on, I have to leave the room. My kids r brilliant and my husband is a total rock for me - without them I just wouldn't be functioning each day. But I don't want to just go through the motions of existing each day at a time I want to live each day and be a part of the events of the day and remember them. At the moment it just isn't happening. I have tried short term sleeping tabs for my own sanity and they stopped working after day 3 of taking them. This is now my 2nd night of no sleep. We have had a bereavement councellor come to see us and she was great but I just don't feel like I have even begun to scratch the surface of how I am feeling. She says I have to get past the trauma of what happened in the hospital before I can even begin to grieve for the loss of a much wanted and already loved baby. My husband is point blank refusing to ever let me go through that again, so no more trying for another baby, and to be honest after what happened who would blame him and I am too scared it would happen again anyway. I am just so low right now and so so numb and sad that I just don't know what I am meant to feel and where to even begin to start to build myself back up again. I still think I might wake up and realise it has just been a bad dream but as time goes on and the daily realities hit me I know I have to face it at some point. I would give anything right now to still have my "bump".
Thanks for taking the time to read this and for hopefully understanding me.
Sadmum32 :(
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Avatar_f_tn
Losing a pregnacy was the hardest thing I had to go through and my heart goes out to anyone who had to experience that.It's alot more common than I thought but that doesn't make it any easier. I wanted to share my story because I went through alot but now I am pregnant again and once again hopefull it will all work out. Sorry this is so long
I was supposed to be 11 weeks when we went for my first ultra sound April 07 . So excited and never had any thoughts that something might have been wrong. I didn't have moring sickness at all but just thought I was lucky. I had experieced very sore breast and cramping similar to period cramps in the beginning but then it stopped which I attributed to being close to my second trimester and now in hindsight I reallize it was a sign of the missed misscarriage. I also had CRAZY dreams in those first few weeks. Of course the mind is just racing around. I had a really bad one where I was going a bit crazy, I had my child with me that changed from a boy to a gril periodically, at one point it had a tail but I didn't mind. Then it was takin away from me and I cried and cried and totally broke down in my dream. I write alot of my dreams down and most are extremly bizzare and sometime scary I never had one this depressing and was shakin when I woke up. I didn't write it down on purpose but now which I did so I'd know the exact date. It was very strange. I had that dream somewhere around 6weeks. Freaky.
Back to the US.I didn't knwo what I was supposed to be seeing on the monitor during the ultrasounds so it didn't look bad to me. Started to get concerned when the nurse wouldn't answer my questions and just kept taking measurments. She asked how far along I was, then asked if I had my dates wrong. Which I absolutly didn't. Then she got out the ultrasound device that goes into the vagina, she said it was totally normal just to get a better look. I can see why she wouldn't want to freak me out unnessesarily. Then she went for the doctor without saying why. The doctor said the baby had stopped developing around 6 weeks even thought the sac continued to grow. That was so long ago I couldn't belive it. I was in shock. She asked if I still felt pregnant. I just stared at her but felt like punching her in the face. What kind of question is that. I wanted to still be pregnant but I felt embarassed to say I still felt like I was. I wanted to get the hell out of there. Wasn't fun leaving because the hospital is only for women and children so there were pregnant women everywhere. It's just part of life but I felt like my body cheated me.
They gave me the normal options, medically induce with pills, D&C, or narural misscarriage. I didn't want to commit to anything yet so I went home. She said some people like to get the procedure done to get it over with. As odd as it was to know the baby wasn't alive I didn't feel grossed out. That was going to be our baby and I felt I had to let my body take care of it. Oddly enough I spotted that evening I got back from the US. Coincidence or did my mind have to let go before my body did. I spotted not much for the next two days. Firgured it would be like a normal period but I couldn't be more wrong. On the third day of bleeding my cramps got worse and worse in a matter of hours. I got in the bathtub for some relief but didn't work. I had a gush of blood come out so wasn't staying in there. Kinda freaked me out. Then I was in so much pain and spent alot of the time on the toilet. Then thought I shouldn't, so I coudl start tracking how much blood loss. It was pretty close to the danger amount of two pads an hour that people mention and I was considering going to the hospital. My husband when to the store and got a heating pad which was the only relief I had and wasn't much. He also got the biggest pads I'd ever seen.lol (He'd never bought any before). Afew hours after the pain had started I felt something pass and instant relief. I bit aprehensive to see what it was but didn't look like anything. Didn't even look like it should have caused me pain. The hard part was over. I continued to bleed lightly for almost 2 weeks and passed one my large clump that was bigger then what caused me pain but I barely felt it. Not having any signs of infection I was good to go. Kinda figured that my doctor would have at least called for a follow up to see how everything went but nothing. Thought that was a bit strange.
It was a very stressfull ordeal but I found it brought my husband and I even closer together. After I had time to think about it I was happy my body was taking care of things. That pregnacy just wasn't meant to be. It didn't make me want to stop trying. I started to be gratefull that I was able to get pregnant. Some poeple don't even get to the point of conception, so I was happy everything seemed to be working. I didn't have my period until 38days from the first day I spotted. Of course we started TTC right away even though some suggest you wait, but I had another period 24 days after that.
Well it's the next month and I tested positive again just a few days ago and I'm excited but a bit nervous. Of course there's not much I can do to prevent anything but try to be healthy. I'm still scared that the same thing will happen and I wont find out untill the first US. If it does I know I'll just lose it. But we are strong and I'll go thourgh anything to have a sucsessfull pregnancy. I wish I had moring sickness everyday just to let me know this are OK. Wish me luck and I promise to update this once I get further along hopefully.

Good luck everyone. I know it ***** and it's hard but don't be discouraged. Our bodies know what they're doing and if it's meant to happen it will!!!
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Avatar_f_tn
I forgot to mention how hard it was seeing people who knew I was pregnant. There were alot of tears but everyone was very supportive. My close family and even my husband took care of telling mostly everyone. However I was on my own at work which turned out to be a completly useless day because I cried everytime I told anyone. Thank god there was only a handfull. Not just a few tears but the ugly face can't stop crying tears. I left early and the next day was completly different and much better. I was proud that I delt with it.
About a month after I miscarriged someone who shouldn't have know I was pregnant (obviously someone told them) congratulated me on my pregnacy and said if they didn't know it they wouldn't have guess by the looks of me that i was pregnant. I had delt with my emotional issues at that point and was more embarrsed for him. Don't think he'll ever ask that question to anyone ever again.
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1726707_tn?1362534538
I recently had a missed miscarriaged and still feel pregnant no matter what \i do I still feel preganant I was schdule for a d&c never went so i guess only time can tell
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1726707_tn?1362534538
Just wondering how u got pregnant so quick?
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Avatar_f_tn
I had a MMC on feb 19th. I was supposed to be 9 weeks in Jan when I went for my first scan, anyway i was only measured 5-6 weeks 3.2mm. I got told there and then that it didnt look good and they thought i was going to miscarry. Anyway I went for a scan on the 10th and shown appart from a 0.5mm growth 3.7mm.. :( I didnt believe it so I decided to have another scan the day after valentines day. It shown the baby had shrunk from 3.7mm to 1.7mm I was devastated at the fact of loosing my baby, it hurt me more to get called the wrong name at that time too because i thought they were muddling me up with someone else but they were right i was having a MMC. I am a mammy to an angel 19th Feb 2011 I sadly lost my little bean, i am now 9 weeks 4 days pregnant again and this is hard it was not expected, I'm still grieving the loss of my first child. Just want to say to all the other mam's out there to angel babies you are not alone, and big hugs to anyone who has gone or is going through this. You are not alone. :) K.H
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Avatar_n_tn
Hi everyone. Just wanted to tell my story. I have four children. I have had two mc in the past year both with bleeding which is how I knew. I am currently pregnant. Yes third pregnancy this year. I found out that my progesterone level was low with first two mc so doc put me on the pills for three mths, I am now approaching 16 weeks but cannot stop worrying. This missed miscarriage thing scares the **** outta me. I have not had any bleeding this time around and heard baby's heartbeat on Friday. I smoke and I know I am adding to the problem. Just hoping baby is still alive since Friday. :(
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi, I feel so sad i when hear or even think of pregnancy after 2 miscarrages. i had 1st miscarrage (miscarriage) in Nov'10 where it was 8 wks & again in June11, 6wks,6days. doctor told us to wait for another 2 periods but unfortunately or fortunately (i don't know) we had unprotected sex last month. i was suppsed to get my periods on 19th July & till date i have not got periods, it's 6 wks 3 days for today. i'm suspecting tht i'm pregnant but when I tested my urine at home twice during 5th week & again in 6th wk the result was negative.
i'm very confused to even got to doctor for checkup becoz i'm very scared of the result.
Friendzzz pls.share some thoughts.....
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Avatar_m_tn
Woww that forum was sooo deep.. I am currently going through the same ordeal!!! My D&C is in the morning. I do not ever want to have this feeling again!!! Went for my prenatal testing and was supposed to be 10w but still measured 6w. My fiance and I was devastated. I was laying on the bed holding his hand and I could see the look on his face, and then I started getting teary eyed because I knew something was wrong. Then a few minutes later we received the news that I had a missed miscarriage a month ago. I still had the symptoms and did not have a clue on what was going on. We are going to get through this and try again in the near future.
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1756157_tn?1312536453
hello,,,
i am 34 and i've had 3 miscarriages and having my 3rd miscarriage as we speak, my first mc was 7/03 and i had a shot and it came out naturally like a period very painful period, my second mc was in 7/05 had a d&c no pain for that one, and my last my lmp was 4/14/11 i found out i was pregnant 5/23/11 i was around 6 weeks and my doctor said it was going to be a very difficult pregnancy due to my uncontrolled diabetes i had an u/s at week 8 and i only had a sac but no yolk the doc gave it another 2 weeks my 2nd u/s the sac got bigger but no yolk....
i started bleeding july 4th 2011 and i am still spotting i feel better i guess time does heal a broken heart i sometimes still get some cramping. i will try again but first i will be more responsible and take care of my health first. i just wish i hadn't told so many ppl about my pregnancy so early on.
now when i go back to work i will have to tell everyone my story :(
well i wish everyone luck and i will keep you all in my prayers.
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Avatar_f_tn
This was my first pregnancy and I was so excited.
I foundout when I did a test after missing two periods. I told my husband, and we agreed not to tell anyone until we had seen the midwife.
She came around to the house, and talked to us for about a hour about everything, took some bloods, and going from my dates came to the conclusion that I was 10wks6days.
We couldn't believe it!!! It was going to be the first grand-child in the family, and I must've fallen pregnant on our first attempt.
When I reached 12 wks we decided to tell the families (before I started showing too much), and I was booked in for a scan at 13wks.
Everyone was so excited and pleased for us.
We went along to the scan all happy, and just so excited that we were going to shortly see our baby. Whilst we were waiting to go in I saw the couple before us go dancing out of the hospital with the picture of their baby. It made me so warm inside.
We got called in, and there, there picture was still on the screen.
The nurse spoke to us briefly before doing the scan... She said straight-away that she had bad news. She said that there was no heartbeat!
I was crushed!!! My world turned up-side-down in less than a minute. I felt asthough everything had been taken away from me in one foul swoop. She looked around again with the machine, and said she was really sorry, but she is 99% sure that I had had a missed-miscarriage. I couldn't stop crying, I was devastated. My husband was with me, and his face just showed shock.
She gave us a "choices" leaflet which gave the options of natural mis-carriage, Tablet induced labour or D&C.
She told us that we had to legally have another scan the following week to make sure there was no change.
I just wanted it all to end straight-away. The longer it went on, the more I hoped that I had my dates wrong, and our baby was alright.
We went for the scan fully prepared for bad news on this occaision. The nurse done a transvaginal scan which showed no change. Even though this was expected I was so emotional, I had to finally accept things.
She was very good and spoke to us about everything and was very understanding. She made me an appointment the following week with a consultant to talk about what I wanted to do.
That came, and after lengthy discussions with my husband we thought the best option was D&C wither by local or general whichever was first. It was general, and it could be done the following day.
I wasn't too bad going into the operation as I could finally see the end of this and the beginning of a new start. I felt somewhat empty afterwards though, and lost! There was no support available and I felt like I had no one I could talk to.
It has now been two weeks and I am still bleeding, and the other night whilst in the shower I passed something... It was like dirty yellow jelly but with black seeds that were wrapped in dark red blood which speckled the tissue. It was a bit bigger than a cherry tomatoe. I have no idea what it was, and thought that by having the D&C I shouldn't pass any tissue. Last night I passed alot of blood clots like a heavy period. I was under the impression that none of this should still be happening to me now and am pretty scared. I am still having bad cramps too...
even though I miss being pregnant and miss my baby I cannot wait to get back to normal and be happy again. I want to start trying for a baby as soon as possible, but fear I may miscarry due to anxiety about this all happening again.
Any advice???
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Avatar_f_tn
Do you have a follow up with the doctor? If not give them a call they will be happy to reassure you or tell you what you need to do. I had the same thing happen and it is hard. It took a while to get back into a normal cycle but 6mo later I was pregnant ( and my cycle was still whacky). I was nervous every visit when they went to find the heartbeat. I still remember my little angel. She would have been the first grand baby then my brothers wife got pregnant. Needless to say people forget fast and it will be hard somedays.  Look to your husband for love and support, even if they don't really understand. A hug and a good cry helps. And look for a support group if you want. I was lucky to have a friend who had a miscarriage and I think it is 1 in 4 pregnancies that end in miscarriage so there are a lot of us out there. Good luck it will get better over time.
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Avatar_f_tn
i need some advice im currently suppose to be 3 months pregnant and found out wednesday i lost the baby at 9 weeks but the baby is still there and has not completed the misscarrage i would prefer not to go in for a evac is there anything i could try to help start the proccess
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi there,

I am verry sorry for your loss. I also misscaried just four weeks ago had the evac procedure. I have had a missed misscarriage and only found out that my baby is dead when i went dor my scan. I was 10 weeks and 5 days and there was no heartbeat. The baby died at 5w 5d and i was experiencing full pregnancy symptoms all this time, no bleeding at all. I think if u decided to wait and let the body take care of it naturally u should just wait paciently. I only decided to have the evac as i wanted to put a clousure to my sad experience of loosing the pregnancy.

Once again i am sorry for your loss

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Avatar_m_tn
hi sasha1991200, i also had a miscarriage at 9 weeks which was Friday Aug. 12, 2011 and i waited all weekend to have nature take its course but today i will find out if the fetus is still in there or not and if it is i will have a D&C  i decided to have that to protect myself from infection and to try again asap when having a D&C I've heard your more fertile at that time
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Avatar_n_tn
WENT 4 MY FIRST U/S SCAN AT 9 WEEK ONLY 2 FIND OUT I HAD A MIS-MISCARRIAGE 3DAYS B4 THAT NOT A GOOD FEELING AT ALL. I WENT 4 3 U/S SCANS THAT DAY AND I WAS HOPING THE DR MADE A MISTAKE BUT CLEARLY THEY DIDN'T. KNOWING THAT I'M NOT GOING HOME WITHOUT MY BABY MAD ME GO CRAZY.SO 2 ALL THE MOMS THAT HAD A MISCARRIAGE  I FEEL U GUYS. AND REMEMBER GOD DOES NOT HURT PEOPLE HE JUST WANT US 2 GIVE HIM ALL OUR ATTENTION. AND HE WILL HEAL YOU.
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Avatar_f_tn
Same thing happened to me last week. Had my d and c monday still felt pregnant. Def going to try again  wont feel complete til i do.
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Avatar_f_tn
Has anyone out there had a normal healthy pregancy when they are o neg blood type and have an antibody?

Answer: I have a daughter in law that carried full tern.. There is hope..
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Avatar_f_tn
I remember taking a home pregnancy test on July 12 and it coming back positive.  I was so excited.  The next day, I had a doctor's appointment with my primary for a follow up to an ER visit a few days earlier.  She had me take a pregnancy test while there and  I was called the next day to find out my test came back negative.  I few moments later, I get another phone call from my doctor's office and they want me to do the blood serum one which confirmed I was pregnant.  So once again happy.  Augst 3, I have my yearly physical and my doctor ask how is pregnancy going and I tell her I am feeling a little too well; not havingy any symptoms.   August 12 (one month later after my first pregnancy test), I go in for my dating US.  I should be approxiamately 8 weeks along.  US tech says I'm only measuring 6 wks 3 days.  I return home and I am not sure what to think.  I call my doctor's office to schedule a follow up US.  Probably about a hour later I get a return phone call.  What the doctor tells me unravels my world.  The baby is measuring way too small and only has a heartrate of 69.  We talk for about  10-15 minutes and finally, sobbing, I kindly tell her I don't want to be on the phone anymore and I say goodbye.  I then schedule a follow up US but since I can't get in the following Friday, I have to wait until Monday (10 days later).   I then called into work.  I go in the next day though.  Unfortunately, I have trouble keeping it together and I tell the charge nurse that I can't be here and explain why.  On my hospital floor, we administer chemotherapy drugs through IVs.  If your pregnant, you no longer are assigned to patients getting chemotherapy as a precaution.  Because of this, my whole floor knew I was pregnant. Several of my co-workers hear my sobs as I go into the our breakroom and they follow me in.  I explained what I found out yesterday at my US.  I asked that the news be spread so I woudn't have to explain it each time and then I go home.  I call in again the next day and thankfully have the following two days off.    I go into work Wednesday and everyone is really good about not bringing it up except for the "I'm sorry".  I could tell some of my co-workers were uncomfortable and I made every effort to be my normal self.  I get through that shift okay but cry on my way out to my car.  The next day I go in and am able to talk about it more to my co-workers with only my eyes tearing up.  It really helped me to not have to suffer in silence although I wish I could have kept my pregnancy a secret until after my first trimester.  I have been on the internet and saw studies where babies with a heartrate of less than 70 have a 100% miscarriage rate.  Despite all of this, I still keep hoping everything will be fine when I go in for my follow up US tomorrow.  Having some hope that I get to be the exception to the findings and being able to talk about it with those who knew I was pregnant, has really helped me get through this period.  My greatest ally however has been my 14 month old daughter.  She is my pride and joy.  Because of her, I have to get out of bed each day but she makes me smile and laugh.  And with what I am going through now and what so many other women have gone through, I realize just how lucky I am to have her.    
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1773429_tn?1378197572
Hey Girls..i really thought i was the only one going through all of this..i had a miscarraige (miscarriage) last november at 12 weeks. it was so heartbreaking..i still think about the morning getting up all excited going for our 1st scan, a real christmas morning but only to find out it was a missed misscarriage..i was trying to be so strong through it all. which i was but i coulnt stop crying and still cant to this day.i think about it everyday and i am always looking for advice of the net. iv been trying for a baby since and nothing :( its nearly been a year since i was pregnant and im starting to get worried as im only 20. i keep thinking that im infertile or something.i always had regular 28 day periods before the misscarriage and now there not coming until a few days after but each different every month. which leads me to believe iv missed my period and i might be pregnant..i think that im getting obsessed with the fact of been pregnant at this stage..i need help..dunno what to do im soo worried..Sorry for ranting on.just need to let it all out. x
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1708784_tn?1356226014
hey misses, first want to say to ya sorry for your loss, having a miscarraige (miscarriage) is horrible thing to go through, i had my last mc 12th june this year and have been ttc since, i really hope you get your BFP soon, just wanted to ask you are doing any charting at all or are you just playing it by ear, it might be just that your missing your fertile window???? im gonna try deanna's sperm meets egg plan this month if my things ever bloody arrive im on day 37 today and did a test this morning and it was of course negative, i just want to say joined medhelp after i had the last mis carraige, and all the girls here know exactly what your going through, i would now be lost with out all their support thanks girls x dont ever think your ranting, we all in the same boat, it seems mister stork is flying right over ireland this year and forgetting us irish gals x SSBD  best of luck
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this truely has to be the best site ever for women who have experienced a m/c or is ttc or for girls  ttc after m/c , its very comforting to know i am not alone , and without the girls on medhelp for support i would be lost i just want to say thank you, and im always here just to listen or help anyone if i can, SSBDXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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I was told two days ago that i have had a missed miscarriage, i should have been nine weeks, we saw the heartbeat at 7 weeks all was well and we felt postitve and couldnt belive our luck, we have been trying for seven years, this was our second round of clomid im now 31.
so I have the operation on tuesday to remove my precious baby.
I feel really upset and kinda empty and spaced out! my boobs still hurt a bit but otherwise i feel no other symtoms (symptoms), before i felt tired,sore boobs, so hungry and thirsty and my belly was a little bump and felt firmer.
I has no idea anything was wrong, except when i think back, there was one day i had cramps, but i was constipated so i thought it was that, but the midwife said it was probably the time it died. I have since bled a tiny bit, but baby is still in there, it looked different, the picture couldnt get a clear focus and the baby looked small. before at 7 weeks it was bright,clear and a lovely heartbeat. When this is op is over, i will try again, but i have said that I will only go through another two miscarriges after that, we will adopt:)
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ah sooo sorry for your loss hun, its very hard i know, im here if ya need to talk look after yourself ccc
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I am now 9 weeks pregnant and a high risk patient. I've been seen since my first positive pregnancy test. The drs gave us so much hope. I was very sick one day, and could not keep anything down so i went to the er before i got too bad off. They did an ultrasound and told my my uterus is growing, but there is no baby. My ob is going off of this ultrasound. She wants to do a dnc. I do not want the dnc. This is my 6th miscarriage. My last one, we lost our daughter at 18 weeks. I don't feel my Dr is doing everything they can to make sure i have lost the baby. I've had no bleeding, spotting,  nothing!
But the day they did the ultrasound, and said there was no baby, i too had the horrible burps that smelt like rotten eggs. I've done this everytime I've miscarried.
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Im so sorry to hear abou these losses..:(Im here if anyone needs to talk..& i back you up on that one babbyboo..i dunno what id do with out talking to all you girls=D xoxo
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H All,
After reading all your heartbreaking stories, it reminded me of the grief and pain that I felt when I lost my son.My partner and I had given up trying to have a baby after 3years of nothing happening. When I found out I was pregnant I felt it was nothing short of a miracle. Up until 21 weeks and 3 days my pregnancy was going great. I found out that I was having a little boy at my 20 week scan, after overcoming the initial few minutes of disappointment ( I had really thought he was going to be a girl) I was so excited. Nothing could have prepared me for what was going to happen the next week. I felt a sharp pain in the  early hours of the morning, this was Sunday 12th Dec 2010, to be honest I didn't think that it was anything serious, so just went back to sleep, at 12noon that day I noticed a little  blood after going to the toilet. So I phoned the hospital who advised me to go over and get checked out, at this point it still didn't seem like something too serious, (although if i'm honest I did have a feeling something was wrong). However went to the hospital and they did all the standard checks blood pressure, urine all seemed fine, when they checked his heartbeat it was as strong as an ox, I remember the midwife saying that he was moving around alot, so you can imagine my relief upon hearing this. Sadly my relief was short-lived because a doctor said they needed to do an internal just to be on the safe side, because I was still getting major cramps and slight bleeding,
Upon doing the internal they advised me that I was in early labour, nothing could be done to save my son.
I was in labour for over 24hours before my waters broke and my son was delivered, as he was only 21weeks and 4days he didn't survive,
That was the hardest day of my life, I got to hold him and have got mementos photos and  his footprints. The 2nd hardest day of my life was the day we buried him. Although I still think about him every day it is getting easier, time really is a great healer, I'll never get over losing as any mother or father would know.  My partner and I are now trying for another baby so far I'm a few days late so fingers crossed that I'll get to have another little miracle.
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I went to our first 12 week scan on friday, we were so excited we have just recently got married so it was our little honeymoon baby, i knew it was too soon to start telling people but i was so excited we couldnt keep it in, the morning of the scan we spend the whole drive plannin the rest of the day, who we were going to see and show off our little angel too, we got to the scan still really excited then i heard the nurse say i cant seem to find your baby, i didnt panick just thought it was hiding after all it couldnt happen to us. So she decided to do an internal, they did find our little baby but it was so small, then my fears came out, the nurse said i was 11 weeks but the baby was only 8 weeks with no heartbeat. I cannot understand what is happening to me, i have had no symptoms, no bleeding, spotting, cramps ect nothing to show there is anything wrong and i am struggling to beleive that if it has already been over 3 weeks i cant have started doing anything yet. They have told me to wait till friday to c what happens if not they are going to give me another scan to be sure i am doing the right thing. In my head i am thinking they were so easy to dismiss it, what if i am not as far gone as i think i am or what if they are wrong. I am so so so sorry you have had to go through this i cannot imagine the extra pain you have had to endure knowing you might not be able to have the treatment again, but we somehow have to find a way to go on and move forward with our life, we dont no each other but if you want to talk you can use my email link xx
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I find these stories comforting because I am experiencing the same heartbreak.  It is true, unless you have experienced it, you just don't understand.  I have 4 children, the oldest is almost 7.  I have had a very early miscarriage (about 4 or 5 wks) and it was between my 3 and 4th child.  This pregnancy was unplanned and not expected, so I didn't know for 6 weeks (the due date was Feb 20th).  We had an ultra sound at 12 weeks and everything was great.  I had an appointment at 13 weeks and everything was fine, heartbeat was strong.  I felt the baby kicking during the 14th week, but started to get concerned because I hadn't felt any movement in the past two weeks.  I rationalized that I never sit still long enough, but I also wasn't showing like I usually am at 17weeks.  At my 17week appointment on 9/12, Dr couldn't find a heartbeat with the dopplar and immediately wanted to do an ultrasound.  I knew it was bad news because the heartbeat shouldn't be hard to find at this point.  

First ultrasound broke my heart when all I heard was my own faint heartbeat and didn't see the fluttering in the baby's chest.  I had a second ultrasound done with a different machine and the day and it confirmed the sad event.  I just can't go through with a D&C so I am going to deliver the baby.  I hope it happens naturally, but I am scheduling to go into the hospital too later this week.  I am not sure about seeing the baby after he/she is delivered.  I also don't know what to do with my baby or how the hospital handles it.  I believe the baby is 14wks.

I am concerned about my husband because he has really grown excited about this pregnancy and I do not know if he understands what delivering this baby will be like.  I wish I could just have the baby at home by myself.

We haven't told our other children yet and I am not sure when we will.  This is very hard and I just do not know if we will try again to have another.  Our 5th pregnancy, 4th child, was difficult.  We had preterm labor at 31 weeks that was thankfully stopped and I carried until 37 weeks.  This unexpected pregnancy really got me excited for another baby but I do not know if my husband will want to try again.

We are just praying about it and we are grateful for what we have been blessed with in our lives because we are very thankful for our children.  I will certainly miss my little one that I was not able to raise, but I will always love.
Amie
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I'm going through a m/c myself, and all these stories are helping me sooo much. this coming tuesday i'm going to my ob so that she can do a u/s to confirm that i had a missed m/c. my question to you all is what do you do with the clots that you pass, either lg or sm?  this has never happened to me before so i'm totally lost on what to do when i pass clots. pls help
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I found out today I have a missed miscarriage, went for my 12 week scan and found out the baby died. I had to have an internal scan after a normal one cos the sack looked empty on the first scan. The internal revealed I'm starting to hemorrhage round my placenta so been advised to let nature take it course.  My pregnancy symptoms seemed to almost vanish bout week n half ago but I look pregnant.  I had bad feelings of sickness from finding out at 6 weeks but I don't know if this was because the baby had died or what.  Its a horrible thing to go through and I really feel for anyone else that's been or is going through it.
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I'm pregnant again! 10 weeks + days. Third time this year. Didn't even really want to acknowledge it until after the early ultrasound. My wonderfully useless doctor didn't even want to send me for one, even though he did the first time for no apparent reason and this time I had a good reason: I already misscarried twice, one of them being a missed miscarriage (April) and then other happened the month before this pregnancy(July) with no period in between. Thankfully my OB sch one once I got to see her. So nervous to go back to the hospital but wasn't as bad as I thought I'd be. Well maybe I held my breath the entire time.lol. The scan went great and I saw the little one moving! It measured 9 weeks + 5 days which is exactly what I had writtin in my journal for that day. We could even see a little heart beating, however they wouldn't use the doppler thing for the beats per minute for some reason. gggrrrrr. I think the actualy reason she gave was that it takes to much energy???? Bull crackers.

Even though everything went great this time it's still hard to take the good news and be happy. Everytime I get a twing of a cramp my mind starts racing thinking something could be wrong. Other peole just don't get it. When you've been tricked by your body once before it's hard to have faith that everything is going fine. My friends just say sit back and relax, just let nature take it's course. They've never had any miscarriages. I have a doctor appt this week to hear the heartbeat so my fingers are crossed that it will be there and be a strong one.
On a side note I have an awfully sore tailbone (or the muscles around it) and it's driving me nuts. Not sure exactly what it is yet but hoping that it doesn't get worse as the pregnancy continues.

Good luck to everyone out there, keep trying! It's hard and it ***** but this is what we have to do.
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Dear Yingwee,

I'm so happy for you. I can feel the happiness in your words. I'm wishing you all the best. Having a hard day today I was supposed to do my first scan 11 weeks +5 days but my little Angel left me over 3 weeks ago..finding it hard. But reading you gave me hope and want to try again even if I'm scared. The very best of luck please god.
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You have just given me hope. I just had a missed mc at 12 wks last Fri for the 2nd time (the 1st mc was at 16wks) For the 1st time in a wk my heart lifted when I read your comment. Wishing you all the best xx
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I'm so glad my post has brought you hope. That's why I came on these forums in the first place, to find similar stories then mine and some encouraging ones. People so often only post when things are going wrong so I like to share my happy stories too.
Still pregnant 12 weeks + days. Got to hear the heart beat which was awesome. Had a spotting scare last week and was totally freaked out. Never came back so everything is still good,although no one could tell me where it came from. I went and bought a doppler for $135 for peace of mind in between appts. Not sure if I'll ever feel totally safe during pregnancy until I'm in the hospital giving birth. I opted not to have the serum testing done for Downs ect... Too many false positives and I don't need any more stress. No matter what the results came back I wouldn't act on them, not after I've wanted this pregnancy for so long. It was still a tough call though.
I also came to find out that my mother also misscarried her first pregnancy but she didn't mention it. Would have been nice to know and maybe I could have prepared myself for that.
Keep up the positive thinking everyone, I'm sure your happy days will come, and when they do you'll appreciated them a lot more!!
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i found out i was pregnant on october 11th. i had a miscarrage (miscarriage) on october 23. i dont kno how far along i was but i think there was a possibility that i was pregnant with twins. it runs on both sides of my family to have twins. i was supposed to find out this week how far i was if i would've still been pregnant. is there a way i could still tell how far i was when i lost my baby and if i was pregnant with twins? pleez keep in mind that i am a first time mother and i am very young. i could use any wise words and advice anyone could give pleez
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I've never posted on any forum before, but I know what it's like to search the net for any trace of hope in the middle of miscarriage or the recovery after miscarriage or during early pregnancy following miscarriage.  I had two consecutive MMC in one year and miscarried naturally both times.  Both times the baby died around 9 weeks, but we didn't find out till 12 weeks.  The second time I waited to miscarry naturally for 2 weeks after the 12 week scan.  It was so hard walking around every day knowing the baby was dead inside me.

I got pregnant again in June, 2011.  I was SO scared and dreaded all the midwife apts.  I was physically trembling at the 12 week scan.  I am now 20 weeks along and feeling the baby move.  It is amazing how magical pregnancy is when it seemed so impossible.  Watching my stomach grow is like a daily miracle, and every time I hear the heartbeat I almost can't believe it.  The whole pregnancy journey has brought me closer to God, and every little kick I feel now is like a gift from Him.  I thought something was so wrong with my body but when it's the right time, everything just works.  Don't give up hope!!!
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Hi sarah I know exactley how you feel inside as I have been trow what you have explained. First of all can I say you are not alone and 2nd you are very brave. I am 28 yrs old and all i wanted was to be a good mother so I was delighted to find out I was pregnant with my first child as i had being told i may not be able to have kids due to having cysts on my ovaries. Me and my partner were very excited the day we went for our first scan i will never forget lying on the bed looking at the screen and the nurse looking a bit uncomfortable as she proceeded with thescan i just knew my child was gone and my dream of being a mum was over. the emotions you go through are undescribable unless others have gone through what we have. I had the D AND C  2 days later i felt so much sadness coming out of the hospital knowing my child was gone from me because i was so uuse to touchin my tummy and thinking wot was to be. Moving forward I had thought to myself this just wasnt to be and it wasnt my time to be a mum. time is a healer and we are young and healthy and you can try for the future when you are ready. As long as you have great support from your partner family and friends you will get through this I dont tink i will ever forget my experience i dont think anyone does all in all i think i am a stronger person for hope for the future and happiness will all come our way if you just believe., I hope i have made you feel a little better and i wish u health and happiness xx thea
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Im 19 weeks find out on nov 8 2011 that the baby had no heart beat  he sent me home carrying the baby I no its gone but somthing is kicking me and moveing em I going crazy or could there b a nother one that have not finded plz if u no any thing that can help
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my heart gos out to everyone, i have a 9 yr old daughter  but 3 threes ago i had a misscarriage but 9 month after  later i did go on to have a healthy boy hes 2 now, but recently well just this tues 8th nov i had a scan 9 weeks and learnt i had a missed misscarriage, heart broken, was booked in for dr intervention but it did end up coming away natually in end, its so sad, i will try again because would love another baby , but am scared it will happen again x
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I discovered on 10th Nov at 12 week scan that sac was empty (silent miscarriage).  Prior to that I didn't think anything was wrong as I had all the symptoms.

I was booked in for rescan the following week (17th Nov) to confirm, followed by D&C.  I was completely devastated and while I waited for the rescan I felt foolish grieving since it seemd as though there was never a baby there to begin with.

The rescan was transvaginal though so showed much more detail than tummy scan.  This time I got to see a tiny 3mm embryo... this was some comfort for me.

As I waited to be admitted to the gynae ward for the D&C, I started reading through my hospital chart.  The pics of both my scans were in the chart  so I photographed the one containing my little embryo.  I'd previously seen everyone coming out of the scan holding the pics of their babies and I was sorry I hadn't asked for a picture of mine, even though it had stopped growing.

The chart also contained more info that I didn't know - eg. that the baby had stopped growing at 5w6d and the sac hadn't stopped til 7w5d, and it gave the size of both.  I'm glad I retained this information as I want to keep as much detail about this as I can, now that it's gone.

So that was all yesterday -- today I'm having a bad day (well I guess it was 2 days ago - it's nearly 3am now).  If anyone's reading this from Ireland, there's a Book of Remembrance for miscarried babies.  You can place an entry into the book for every lost baby and it will be kept forever:
http://www.miscarriage.ie/bookentry.html

FYI - I asked the doc about the D&C procedure to find out whether it would be scraping the womb or suction - he didn't really want to tell me but conceded that it would be suction (may be called D&A).  The procedure went very well and I'm not in pain today.  So I'd recommend it if you have a choice.

Good luck to everyone facing this... and if you do have to have evacuation, talk to the girls in the ward with you - they're facing a similar situation.
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I think no one should ever do a d&c i was told my baby died and received a second opinion they peformed a d&c on me then 2 weeks later found out i still had a baby inside me bc i was having pain i went bk in to doc then my water broke at 26 week stayed in hospital til i was 31 weeks she was 2 months early weighin 3lbs 13 oz so there is a GOd and he is real and i have living proof just know doctors are humans too just like us and they can mess up too
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Hi, I am said to be 7 weeks or so pregnant but during my UltraSound last week, the Dr couldn't find the baby or heartbeat so she told me...I am either too early than what they thought or it may be ending in miscarriage:(! I was given another US appointment for this week (2 more days) and I am hoping everything will be alright and they see a perfect healthy baby this time. I feel pregnant and I have severe nausea! I am hoping these are indicating I am carrying a healthy baby...does anyone know..if miscarriage...will we have nausea? I hope not..as I have nausea and I am hoping to hear a good news this wednesday! Please help! I am spending every minute as hard as I can from last week.
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I know your post was a few months ago ( really hope things have gotten better for you emotionally and physically ) but Ive just came across it tonight and I cant bear to just read and run. Im so sorry to hear what you have been through, shame on that doctor who caused you so much pain, its outrageous.
Im afraid time is the only true healer but things will get less painful for you as it goes by. Im on my 5th miscarriage and waiting to see what the next step is for me after being told theres no embryo, only an empty sac. Ive had the tablets you were referring to but they didnt work for me so after this 2 week wait Im told I may have to go to theatre for a D&C. We shall see. Good luck to you and your family, really hope your on the mend now. x
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I am so sorry for your experience.  Losing a baby is tragic at any stage of the pregnancy and to have environmental complications such as yours only magnifies your emotional pain.  Having been through a similar situation, I understand how you must feel.  As this reply is almost 5 months after your post, I hope that you are more able to cope with your loss.  I am praying for you, your husband and your two precious sons.
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The stories have made me cry! I hope things get better soon!

I'm currently going through the most confusing thing Doctors have ever seen, so i'm reaching out for help!

I went for my first U/S Oct 10th. and i was told i was 9w 2d, all was find and dandy. I had som pain but turned out it was gas..no biggy. No bleeding NOTHING!, I recently went for a scan- Nov 23rd and i was told my baby's heart rate was slow...but not dead...And thats i'm only 10 weeks! I'm suupose to be 13w and 4 days today!

thing thats confusing is the U/S tech said "i didn't know if it was mom or a fetal heart beat..which is stupid because YOU CAN SEE!!! uhh so stressful!

Have any of you ladies experienced this..I have a gut feeling something isn't right! and i swear i feel movement (this is my second child)



I dont understand and my hubby and i are dumb founded!


if any ideas! please let me know

I'm sorry for the loss, its never easy, i'm pretty sure i'm in the same boat :'(
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Nausea can be a very good sign.  I think as you are only 7 weeks, if you are a week or so out with your dates, then it is quite normal to not hear a heartbeat yet.  
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I hope you have adopted, it is the most wonderful experience ever.  I went through 4 rounds of IVF (including 2 donor cycles), had 2 miscarriages, one being a missed miscarriage.  After that we adopted my daughter who is now 20 months old.  I am pregnant again with a donor egg (we had left over frozen eggs that I needed to use for closure) I am scared, had heavy bleeding at 7 and 8 weeks, but scan showed ok.  Now 12 weeks and for the past week have had brown spotting and cramping.  Still feel pregnant, but thinking having another missed miscarriage.  But, I am ok, have my wonderful adopted daughter who is the light of my life.  
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I had an unplanned pregnancy In 1995 after thinking my husband and I were finished having children. At 8 weeks pregnant I had previously saw the baby and the heartbeat.  I went to my doctors appointment by myself thinking it was a routine visit to find that when they did an ultrasound they couldn't find a heartbeat.  I was devastated.  Although my husband and I had children in middle school I embraced the thought of having another baby. (My husband took a little longer to embrace the feeling).  I drove home in a fog.  They told me to let them know if I started having any symptoms of miscarriage especially heavy bleeding.  Two days later the bleeding started so heavily that they scheduled a D & C the next day.

Thinking that I would never have another baby because I was in my late 30's, the loss of the baby was hard to bare.  This was in Oct, 1995.  I begged my husband to please let us try to get pregnant again.  I didn't think I would survive the loss otherwise. He told me if I got pregnant before his scheduled vasectomy then we would have a baby, otherwise he was scheduling his vasectomy for January 1996. Our baby boy was born... November 1996.  God is so good.. I found out the week of the scheduled vasectomy that I was indeed pregnant.  He was born a healthy 8 lb 8 oz baby.  I'm so thankful to God for this miracle.  He has been such a blessing to me and my husband.  My husband then regretted his vasectomy.  But we are thankful to have 3 sweet boys to raise.  

To memorialize the baby I lost, I embroidered Baby and the year on a cloth angel and hang it first on my Christmas tree every year.  A small way to remember the baby I will see one day in heaven.

RDMF
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hi i am only 21 my pregnancy was a mistake but over the past few weeks i have gotten used to it and we have started really looking forward to it and started to get organised my 12 weeek scan was last week and i was told that they thought there was only an empty sac. and measured at 7.2 weeks i go back tomo to find out if i have a healthy baby or if i have had a missed miscarriage i have been waiting 10days and just wish there was some way to know ssince yesterday i have been having bleeds and its starting to look like baby isnt going happen just wanna know how to deal with it the empty horrible feeling! any advice is much thanks eccles
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I was supposed to be 14 weeks pregnant today. Just came from the doctor completely in shock. I had my first sonogram taken at 7 and then 11 weeks. When we saw the image today, right away i realized something was wrong as I heard no heartbeat but was too afraid to say a word. That was the longest moment, me and my husband holding hands were told that it has been 2 weeks since the missed misscariage happened. Which is only 1 week after my second sonogram when we heard the strong 140 bpm heartbeat. I have no symptoms of misscariage whatsoever if anything my breasts are still sore, and I swear I could feel slight flickering movements. Im terrified that I've a dead child inside for the last weeks and How long could I be waiting for the natural evacuation of the uterus ? we scheduled the D&C for January 3rd ...don' know how to get through the next days with all the holiday and celebration coming up... If anyone is going through the same right now please share....
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wanted to say for all who have lost a baby during miscarriage or a child my heart goes out to you all. My prayers and hopes that we all get our strengths back and get all the support we need. I was 17 weeks pregnant with twin girls. I went in on a wed with mild contractions and was givin Iv fluids and sent home. Then on Thursday went back to the hospital with contraction still that never went away. Still givin Iv fluids and told there was nothing they could do since i was to early in my pregnancy. Nothing can be done until after 20 weeks I was told. I had Ultrasound and babies were fine and moving and heartbeat was great. So once again I was sent home. This time around Fri 3am I had contractions so strong and close together and I have kids so I knew what to look for. I called 911. I went to the hospital and gave birth at 3:33am with one twin and then at 5:58 the other.both were alive and died in my hands. my husband and I are losing our minds. It happen on 'blackfriday 2011' which every year will be remembered but I feel so dead inside myself. Im so upset cause doctors and nurses kept telling me everything was alright and that the ultrasound were fine. and nothing they can do just doesnt seem right. My nurse was great that day. she let me stay with my girls for as long as I wanted. the hospital took free pictures for me to take home and I got footprints and all the stuff they give you for a live birth since they were alive. I was in total shock. my husband died in my arms for three hours so I had to be strong for him. I went home the next day. having to make funeral arrangements for them. we decided to creamate them so they can be home with us. It took two weeks for the hospital to release the babies cause the doctor sign in the wrong spot on death certificate. When the girls were done and I had to pick them up. That was when it hit me. I cried on the floor for hours and my husband was there for me. My kids hug me to trying really hard to get through it. I think now I have postpartum cause I cant snap out of it. I cry and just feel wrong. I felt them move and miss them so much. My husband want to try again and I agreed. Im even seeing a therapist and she said it might help my lose. Give me one at least I pray. I know in time all pain heals but this one is a great lose to me. We were really happy thinking two twin girls were on there way. I hope my story helps in some way. We all go through some pain and I know to each is great. I feel mine is also. but I pray for us all and in hopes God knows what he is doing I keep saying. I lost a daughter at five months due to sids in 1993 and that was just death for me but i realize i made it still. my husband and I are trying again and just praying for happiness. May all our prayers be answered and bless you all
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I realize alot of post are old but obviously people like us are still finding it so I wanted to share my story as others who have shared have helped me. My husband and I have been trying since march 2011 to get pg. we found out the first week of Nov 2011 that we were going to have a baby. I had my first scan from a free clinic for low income families called Birthchoice at 7wks5days, little heart flickering strong. went to my OB for first visit about week later, they did not try to find heart beat with doppler at this time as it was a little early to find with that they said, so scheduled next appointment for the 3 weeks later at this appointment I was around 11 weeks they did try to find heart beat with doppler this time but no luck she didn't even try hard bout 5 mins- this clinic was not intrested in taking time with patients but took forever to get to them (3 hrs)! She said this was normal to not find it yet and would try next time. i had spotted some on and off lightly and told them, they were not concerened said this was normal if i wasnt cramping. Two weeks later I am spotting more now- everyday. I called them they said this was normal sounding but i could come in if i wanted. Next day spotting picks up to bright red bleeding and light cramping, I go to see them they took blood from my arm after I sat there for 3 hours, then sent me home to wait on them to do a blood test and they would get back with me in 2 days!!!!!! I thought what kind of care is this? next morning im hurting bad and bleeding needing pads now, i go to emergency room. I was in er for 6 hours and waiting to hear about the baby before they even told me they baby passed they came in and said oh you need surgery for fetal demise. I was like for what they havent even broke the news to me that the baby was gone. I am  about 13 weeks and they baby had died at 8 weeks and 5 days, I am bleeding and cramping but nothing is coming out on its own the er said so I need a D & C to make sure i dont get an infection.  I cried so hard, my husband is devasted as is my six year old daughter. So the whole time I was seeing my doctor I didnt even have a baby anymore I think it is very sad they wouldn't listen to me i asked them to check hormone levels told them I didnt feel pregnant anymore for weeks i voiced these concerns and no one listened. I am writing to ya'll right now jan 5, 2012 waiting on 5:00 a.m. to get here for my scheduled D & C tomorrow by the idiot that couldnt even tell I wasnt pregnant anymore and I'm scared. I hope she doesnt screw me up where i cant have kids anymore. I just want all mothers to know when people tell you dont worry your just paranoid your fine. You listen to your body and your motherly instincts demand tests and scans and change doctors. Not that is was anything preventable but what if it was? these people never would have known because they didn't even take the time to look. my heart goes out to all the ladies who have or are experiencing this. if your not sure and you are googling these things have yourself checked trust yourself. I miss my little peanut.
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I have looking through all these comments, trying to find something from someone who had a later miscarriage and I can't believe how similar our stories are! My husband and I also have 4 children(oldest is 8), and have also experienced an earlier miscarriage (6 weeks) between our 2nd and 3rd child. We were pregnant with our last baby, but on September 17, 2011 I started miscarrying. He was our last baby and now he's gone and it just hurts so much still. I ended up miscarrying completely at home and have to say it was one of the most terrifying experiences I've ever had. I lost so much blood so quickly that I could hardly keep myself from fainting. My husband couldn't even lift me off the flour for hours without me blacking out.  It seems so weird how one little tiny person can have such an impact on your life, but I still am having a harder time 'getting back into the swing of things'.
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I know what your saying and mean. I had a similar experience with healthcare professionals. I miscarried on the 4th jan. I went to the out of hours clinic as i had been in pain for four days and started to think something was really wrong. The doctor who saw me tried everything to get me seen in the hospital and several doctors refused. He argued with them on my behalf and couldn't get me seen. I was sent home terrified and was give a number to ring at 9 in the morning which turned out to be a wrong number. My mum finally got in touch with someone that morning and they were not going to see me for another 3 days. By this stage I started bleeding heavilily and only for a midwife who recognised my name I wouldn't have been. She took me in and done everything she could and i was sent home and later rang to confirm I had lost my baby. I have two little boys at home but I am devasted over my miscarriage. This is the third miscarriage i have had. The doctors make me angry cos they don't care how we feel and what we are going through. It sickens me at the end of the day they are baby's and ok a miscarriage can't be prevented but they should at least support you and be caring towards you, its hard enough. I read your story and my heart goes out to you as all the girls. Sometimes life just isn't fair, all I keep doing is thinking its all my fault and going over and over did I do something wrong?
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Could anyone help me? im 13 years old.. im fully aware that i am too young to have a baby and i accept that very well, so i dont really need lectures as i have already had those from my mum, alot of them. I had sex with my boyfriend, and the condom split, i wondered why it split so easily but i spoke to my local clinic and they said its probably because of the moisturizer i put on my legs, because i always use this strawberry stuff when i want my legs to feel smooth! Anyway, as the condom split, his sperm went inside of me, and it was too late before i could take the morning after pill, so i went to a shop in town and got a pregancy test. It wasnt a very good one, it was quite cheap, but i read through the instructions and i had to urinate onto a white stick with little marks on it.. if it turned a certain colour, i was pregnant, and it did. I was panacking and i was really emotional and trying my best to hide it from my mum that i was so upset was difficult.. 3 weeks later, millions and millions and millions of this white-ish pale red goo came out of my vagina, it wasnt like discharge or period, it was thick goo, REALLY thick, ive had some odd periods and discharge before but i had never seen anything like this. I thought nothing of it, then two days later i came on my period, which confused me a little if i was pregnant, so i went back down to the shop and got another test, and it was negative, so i did a little research and i seem to of had a miscarriage. im really young so i dont really know alot, but is it normal for all of that goo to come out if ive had a miscarriage? it really creeped me out and i was so shocked. I finally told my mum because i cant keep hiding it from her. advice would be much apprecciated x
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We were so excited... First pregnancy and everything seemed like it was going well.  No morning sickness, no fatigue, just sore breasts. We had been going to an OB who dismissed my concerns and showed some real ineptitude, and refused to give us a dating US (despite the fact that my periods were irregular and we didn't know how far along we were...). At ten weeks, I switched OBs and my new OB immediately performed an US. She said that the baby stopped growing at 6wks5d and had a weak heartbeat. We hoped and prayed for four days and went back today for an US... No heartbeat, and baby began to shrink... My breasts aren't as sore, but my belly is still there. Very, very sad. We're going back on Monday for a just-to-be-sure US and have scheduled a D&C... I wonder if missed miscarriages are harder than regular miscarriages since they just sneak up on you when you think everything is going great... No bleeding, no cramps... Anyway, am sad and wanted to post. BTW, finding the new OB was a godsend. This experience is awful, but would be SO much worse with the other OB (the demeaning one who wouldn't listen to my concerns). If anyone is in the DC area, I can recommend an OB. Thanks for letting me tell my story.
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Am now 21 weeks pregnant, my first was a missed miscarriage which due to wrong guidance of the doctor i carried it till 19 weeks. now i got a scan at 20 weeks baby was good aging 19 weeks 2 days. I have no cramps, no bleeding, sometimes  i feel a gas ball like thing rolling inside my lower abdomen. But still i fear because of my previous experience. would anyone help me saying whether there are any chances of carrying my baby dead unknowingly without any symptoms? still i know there is no chance still i need some soothing and confident words which would make me comfort. please help me in this regard. I have read the stories of everyone just today. Am new to this forum still i feel i ll also get some assurance from someone..
u can also mail me in ***@****
Thank you..
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My mmc was my first pregnancy (so I don't have much experience)  but I can tell you that I had very few symptoms during the whole ten wk pg (which I attribute to the baby stopping growing at six wks). The only symptom I had was sore breasts.... They became a lot less sore as soon as the baby died- and by the time we had the US that showed no heartbeat (three days later) they were not sore at all. So, I'd say that if you still have symptoms, then it's a very good sign! Keep praying and hoping...

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That is so true.  When Something like this happens it doesn't happen because God is punishing.  He does not work that way.  We are his children.  The world is imperfect-Full of sin which in turn is the cause for all illness and disease.  If you believe in Him, one day we will live on a perfect earth where nothing like this will happen.  This is what he wanted for us for this earth in the beginning, but ruined that.  For now, just appreciate what you do have here and hold on to the hope of the perfect world.  If you keep the faith, God will show you glimpses of heaven here on this earth.  

I AM 9 1/2 WEEKS PREGNANT AND DOCTOR SAYS NO HEARTBEAT. AND THERE IS A FETAL POLE.   NO SIGNS OF A MISCARRIAGE.  FEEL PREGNANT (MORNING SICKNESS AND FATIGUE) AND LOOK PREGNANT BIG TIME.  IT IS HARD FOR ME TO ACCEPT THAT I AM NOT PREGNANT.  BUT I HAVE FAITH THE LORD AND I WILL WAIT FOR MY BODY TO DO WHAT IT WAS DESIGNED TO DO.  MISCARRIAGES HAPPEN NATURALLY BECAUSE OUR BODIES RECOGNIZE SOMETHING ISN'T RIGHT-THE WAY GOD DESIGNED IT.  GRIEVING IS NORMAL, SO I WILL GRIEVE, BUT I WILL TAKE SOME COMFORT IS KNOWING THE LORD IS IN CONTROL AND IT WILL BE OKAY.  PLZ TRY TO DO THE SAME...
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When Something like a miscarriage happens it doesn't happen because God is punishing us. He does not work that way. We are His children and he loves us. The world is imperfect-Full of sin which in turn is the cause for all illness and disease. If you believe in Him, one day we will live on a perfect earth where nothing like this will happen. This is what he wanted for us for this earth in the beginning, but sin ruined that. For now, just appreciate what you do have here and hold on to the hope/promise of the perfect world. If you keep the faith, God will show you glimpses of heaven here on this earth everyday.

I AM 9 1/2 WEEKS PREGNANT AND THE DOCTOR SAYS THERE IS NO HEARTBEAT BUT THERE IS A FETAL POLE. THERE ARE NO SIGNS OF A MISCARRIAGE. I FEEL PREGNANT (MORNING SICKNESS AND FATIGUE) AND LOOK PREGNANT BIG TIME. IT IS HARD FOR ME TO ACCEPT THAT I AM NOT\ LONGER PREGNANT. BUT I HAVE FAITH IN THE LORD AND I WILL WAIT FOR MY BODY TO DO WHAT IT WAS DESIGNED TO DO. MISCARRIAGES HAPPEN NATURALLY BECAUSE OUR BODIES RECOGNIZE SOMETHING ISN'T RIGHT (THE WAY GOD DESIGNED IT). GRIEVING IS NORMAL, SO I WILL GRIEVE, BUT I WILL TAKE SOME COMFORT IS KNOWING THE LORD IS IN CONTROL AND IT –WILL- BE -OKAY. PLZ TRY TO DO THE SAME...I WILL PRAY FOR YOU.

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Thank you so much to everyone for bravely sharing your experience and posting to forums like this.  I read these after my missed miscarriage was confirmed by my doctor last week.  It is only because I found your stories that I was able to understand what was happening to me and actually understand and make some choices.

My story:  I discovered I was pregnant 5 days after my missed period. My fiancé and I were overjoyed since we just began trying and we were pregnant with our first try.  I called the nurse at my ob-gyn's to discuss next steps.  She told me they don't do sonograms until the 7th week since they can't see anything until then. I also told her about light spotting that I started seeing the day before.  She told me not to worry as spotting is ok if pinkish or brownish, and not accompanied with sharp cramps on left/right side of uterus/pelvis. The light spotting continued the rest of the time.  However, two days before my scheduled doctor's visit, I started bleeding more heavily and had to wash the blood from my underwear and begin using a pantyliner.  The bleeding was still relatively light, but I noticed that my breasts were less tender and my jeans were less snug around the waist.  I also felt my overall crampiness increase.   On an intuitive level, I felt sadness and a huge increase in thoughts/fears of miscarriage all of week 7.  

At my Friday ob-gyn appt end of week 7, I noticed tiny bits of tissue in the cup with my urine sample.  I did a second sample and saw tissue again and knew in my heart it was over.  The doctor did the sonogram and said there was no fetal heartbeat.  She said the baby looked a week smaller in growth and guessed that it had died week 6 (around when my spotting had started).  The doctor was young and seemed to feel so bad for me that she didn't clearly explain what was to happen next.  She gave me a prescription for a pill (the abortion pill) that she said I could either fill, or schedule a D&C, or wait and see if I would miscarry on my own since I was already bleeding.  I wrongly assumed I was already actively miscarrying since I was bleeding and decided not to fill the prescription since my fiance was traveling and I would be by myself.  

I went home in a total daze and didn't do anything for a few hours.  I finally looked at the sheet the doctor gave me that said I was having a "Missed Abortion." I didn't understand what that really meant until I read the postings in these forums.  A missed miscarriage is specifically when your baby has already stopped living/growing but is still present / attached to your body.  That's why it's a "missed" miscarriage and not a miscarriage.  I had no idea when I left the doctor's office that I would basically have to go into labor and deliver an unborn child, probably into my toilet bowl.  And I had no idea that it could take weeks to miscarry and, if it didn't happen naturally, I would either have to go in for surgery or take the abortion pill (unless past 1st trimester).

I cried for hours after that --since I finally truly understood what was going to happen to me.  I was so terrified of the pain and also that the process could take days or weeks.  Finally, when I could cry no more, I remembered Christianne Northrup's book 'Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom' mentioning acupuncture and accupressure points that could induce labor or a miscarriage. I immediately started researching online and couldn't believe how readily available info on the exact locations of these points were.  I especially studied these 2 links:

http://www.ehow.com/how_2320145_use-acupressure-complete-miscarriage.html

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnEcLSHTI0s

I decided to use all the techniques described in both links. I felt the information in the eHow page gave me the strongest results. Using the eraser tip as advised seemed to give the right amount of pressure to activate my body and, in particular, the Spleen 6 point gave me the most cramping.  Spleen 6 seems to be universally acknowledged as the most effective pressure point, so I covered a large enough area on both my legs to be sure that I was hitting it (since I had no idea what I was doing).   After I did the acupressure (for an hour, alternating between all the techniques) my bleeding became very heavy and I felt a rush of fluid and tissue exit my body.  I felt sure it was the pregnancy sack but could not bear to examine.  I took 600mg doses of Ibuprofen every 4 hours the entire weekend.  I never experienced labor pains, but definitely had heavy heavy cramps.

I continued to do the acupressure that night and the next day, just in case there was more to pass.  All I got was a heavier-than-normal period after Friday night.   5 days later, I stopped bleeding and was back in the ob-gyn office for a follow-up sonogram. The doctor (a different one, more experienced) was amazed by my story and the use of acupressure points.  She even shared that when she was pregnant and late with her own delivery, she had gone for a footrub and the next day went into labor.  She then confirmed in my sonogram that I had passed all the tissue and my body had done good.  She asked me to send her the acupressure links so she could share with her patients.  I wanted to share here as well as I hope this may help any of you who may wish to try this. I don't know if it will work for you, but I truly believe it worked for me.  

I am still tender in the Spleen 6 area on both my legs, but that was a small price to pay for being able to assist my body to miscarry in one day.  I truly hope my story is helpful to anyone out there reading this.  My heart goes out to you.  God bless.
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I've been through missed miscarriage twice n I'm so sad. It was bad experiences when I know I'm loosing my baby coz I couldn't see their heartbeat during my 8th weeks of pregnancy eventhough my body kept telling me that I was pregnant. I lost my baby on December 2011 at my 12th weeks of pregnancy and then I lost my twins on March 2012 also at 12th weeks of pregnancy. Both were diagnosed as missed miscarriage.
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I miscarried last may of 2011. It was a terrible experience for me as well. I had found out i was pregnant in febuary of 2011. I was 2 months. I went to my doctor and everything was fine I seen the baby the heartbeat the whole 9 yards. I returned in March and heard the baby's heart beat it was 163. My next appt was May 16th and i returned I was four months but unfourtnatley no heartbeat was found. The doctor said the baby had been dead for approximatley 2 weeks. So I misscared at 14. My doctor informed me that i could either wait a week and my body should expel the baby itself or If it didnt which could happen and i could get sick they would have to induce labor and deliver naturally. I chose to just deliver asap because I just didnt feel right having my dead baby inside me. It took 2 days to induce labor and finally at 9:01 AM my body finally induced. I felt something move inside me and I knew it was coming. I delivered my baby 7 inches I later found out it was a boy and I named him shawn I wanted to hold him before I left and he fit in the palm of my hand. I can honestly say that was horrible and my heart goes out to anyone who has experinced a misscarge no matter how far along it is a heart wrenching experince that will live with you forever.
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my heart goes out to you, i too have suffered missed miscarriages two of them in less than six months i am in the middle of one right now i wish i wasnt so scared but this is heartwrenching and it seems like the ob gyn that i have had for so long just doesnt care any more i was told today that my baby was for sure dead and im sitting here contemplating natural or dnc and crying how can i do anything else you know even though i have three wonderful boys and have been through 1 spontaneous miscarriage before my first child and a missed miscarriage on january  1st of 2012 this one seems harder because of what the doctor said. he said my eggs were too old and did not have good enough quality to carry out a pregnancy anymore i think that is the coldest thing i have ever had any one tell me.i am so scared and so sad i love my kids and i always wanted to have a girl but now they r telling me there is no way never again  please pray for me and you aare in my prayers i hope you have a baby  because there is nothing sweeter
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I am so greatfull that you wrote in.  I just read your story and know how you feel.  I lost son at 20 weeks.  He was our first boy.  Its been hard especially for our 3 other children.  They would hug and talk to my belly.  It was really from them I learned my greatest lessons.  I was angry at everyone everything.  This included God.  However my prescious girls taught me to still believe.  When we would pray as a family it was them with no prompting that thanked our Father in Heaven for their brother that he would be allowed to watch over them and that we would have another baby.  How strong their love was as well as their faith.  We found out that our son had passed the day after easter the tie we celibrate our Savoir living again.  That's what it had to come down to for my husband and I.  Do we trust in our Father in Heaven enough to let Him watch over our son?  Michelle Dugger really helped as she was going through this same experience so publicly.  She still grieved for her child even though she had 19 other children.  She talked about how her child would wake up and the first face she would see would be God's.  That brings comfort for I know my son will see beauty every day.  I also know he knows how much he is loved and wanted.  As a mom I did all I could and he knows.  Your daughters know too.  I believe families are forever.  Yes I trust in God for even now I pray that He will still watch over my children here on earth to love and protect them and I trust that He will love and protect our angels till we can be with them.
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i just go thru something rite now... dnt no wat to do
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I have miscarried twice. With my first one people kept telling me "I'm sorry" & it would make me so angry. I was thinking, "Sorry won't bring my baby back!" And yet, when I speak to someone who has lost their baby, "I am so sorry for your loss" is exactly what comes to mind.
When I came back to the hospital 2 days after my initial visit, I had a female doctor come in and tell me that my miscarriage was confirmed, and that I would need to come back in couple more days to make sure that I was passing everything. I just sat there dazed, and asked "I AM miscarrying?"  She just looked at me, shrugged her shoulders and shook her head saying, "It's no big deal. It happens all the time." No empathy. No emotion. I couldn't believe it. That was the beginning of my own day from hell. Mine was not as horrible as yours though! My second miscarriage was this last Christmas Eve (2011), and then I had to go to church and hear about Mary being pregnant with promise, and silently bawl through the service. But, this too, was not nearly as bad as your experience.
I guess this is what I have to offer (hopefully you're already experiencing this): at first, it's all you think about, but as time goes on, you can go longer w/o thinking about it (almost constantly, couple times an hour, few times a day, few times a week, handful of times a month, etc.). I miscarried my first child almost 7 years ago , and I now think about it sometimes (not every time) that we go to visit my in-laws (we lived by them when it happened), when our baby should have been born (I think about how old he/she would be, & what he/she would be doing), at our son's B-Day, when I'm wishing I could get pregnant again, and when I talk to someone else who has lost a baby. The loss from a miscarriage stays with you, but the intensity of the emotions fade GREATLY.
If you aren't already, you will go on to live a happy, fulfilling life. The baby you lost will linger in the recesses of your mind, and occasionally you will think about him/her and be sad for a little while, before you push it back down and go on with your day.  
I don't know if that helped, but I pray that it did in some way.
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I just found out that I have a missed miscarriage.  I'm waiting it out, for now.  My body looks and thinks it's pregnant...have the belly, the nausea, cravings, fatigue.  Embryo has been *dead* for at least 6 weeks.  Never knew this condition existed!  My husband is very disappointed while I take a practical? approach.  I view the demise of the embryo as a natural occurrence...it wasn't meant to be as it likely had genetic glitches.
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Just wanting some advice i am 9 weeks today according to lmp i went for my first ultrasound scan yesterday and after the student nurse scanning for 2 minuites she said sorry its bad news i cant find the hearbeat. She had no intentions of getting another doctor in the room untill i asked for someone to come and check. Another nurse came in and glanced at the screen and said yes i agree with that. I then went into another room and was seen by another news she gave me 3 options and said i had a missed miscarriage. I tried to asked questions about the babys measurments and what they think could of happend but she just fobbed me off by saying if i was you id have the surgery. She was very pushy and when i decided i wanted to wait and do it naturally she just gave me a three page leaflet and told me to go home. I went home with no information about what had happend or what to expect i did ask for another scan in a week and she refused and said the only way i will get another is if i pay and go private she told me she would cancell all my midwife appointments and that i did not have to do anything which i found rude. A friend of mine went for a scan at 10 weeks and was told there was no heartbeat and a week later went private and the heartbeat was found i told the nurse this story and she laughed and said no thats not right i am 100% sure you have lost this baby. I still feel pregnant and have no sighns of a miscarriage starting so why are they saying this i am very confused and dont no wether to believe them or my gut instinct. I have researched online and all the posts people have put say they had follow up scans and blood work but i was given no option for this. I called my gp this morning and she has just told me to wait it out but said they are not normally wrong. Does anyone have any advice for me or has anyone been through something like this ? Thanx for reading x
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I sorry. I have been through this, at 10 weeks. I watched the sono and as they pushed to get the baby to move or check that nothing was blocking the heart, I still saw nthe same thing they did, nothing.  The measurement was off as well. they should have told yo9u the measurement at least. Im sure its on your records. Demand it to make you feel better. Chances are they are right.  A missed miscarriage will leave your body believeing it is still pregnant. Waiting for it to natually miscarry can be a long wait, up to 6 weeks I hear. Hopefully sooner. I would recommend a D&C just from the waiting and heartche point of view. Also you risk a infection naturally. Good luck and again Im sorry.
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Hi all, I had a abortion this sunday 15 july 2012. I was 10weeks along but didnt have much nausea since last week. It was worrying me but I thought it happens. Anyway I was scheduled for ultrasound on thursday and had doc's appointment on friday after the ultrasound. This was my second ultrasound after first discovering my six weeks baby with heart beat. During the ultrasound my doc didnt seem happy.
She told me to empty my bladder and she did my TVS. She said u have some complications I suggest u discuss with your doc, we can't find the heart beat. This was such a crushing news for me I just went to my DH outside the radiology room and burst into tears, I just could see what's gonna happen and  couldn't believe it's happening to me, I didn't pass even a drop of blood throughout the pregnancy so a miscarraige (miscarriage) was not at my mind at all. Anyway I couldn't contain myself and went to my Gynaecologist right after the ultrasound, she was busy in the operation theatre, She checked my reports when she came out. To my dismay she told the same. Although I was 10 weeks 5 days but the baby was only 7 weeks 4 days, and the heart beat found at 6 weeks is no more, Its a 'missed abortion'. I cried myself to sleep that night. The next day (Friday) I again had ultrasound and TVS by another doc for second opinion, but same result, no heart beat. I got myself admitted in the Hospital on Saturday. They put in 4 tablets in my vagina so I can miscarry (because there was no sign of natural miscarraige (miscarriage)) after 6 hours of tablets I felt extreme pain waves in the uterus and had 2-3 hours of painful and bloody miscarraige (miscarriage) late at night. In the morning they took me for another ultrasound which showed the miscarraige (miscarriage) was not complete and have to do D & C. They didn't let me eat the whole day and did my D& c at 7pm . I was discharged at 11pm yesterday night. So what was supposed to be a happy weekend after the ultrasound showing my 10weeks old healthy baby turned out to be a nightmare and now I am only left with sorrow and emptiness... I am sorry guys for taking your time but just wanted to share...May all of you have happy healthy pregnancies...baby dust to All!!
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I never write on forums, but it is very helpful reading them, so I thought I would contribute with my story. It is also kind of therapeutic as well, so it is as much for mine as for everyone else's benefit that I am writing this.

I am a surgeon and worked in Obs and Gynae for a period of time as part of my training. I feel extremely unhappy when I read about those of you who have had bad experiences as a result of lack of information, support or professionalism by hospital staff. It is not an excuse, but all I can say is that we are only human and, unfortunately, there are busy, distracted, stressed, careless and impolite doctors, nurses and midwives just as there are in any other group of people you can think of.

I have seen things from both sides, and I know very well how it feels from both of them.

I have been the doctor telling someone that that precious baby they were so excited about is no longer alive; and I have been the tearful, hopeless patient who can't even believe the sonographer or doctor when the word "miscarriage" leaves their mouth.

I have had to explain those dreaded three options (wait and see, medical management or dilatation and curettage -D&C-) to couples that clearly just wanted to go home, hug each other and cry; and I have had them explained to us as well, when our whole world and dreams had just been shattered.

I have performed D&Cs with my own hands, and I have been the one taking the anaesthetic, knowing that once you wake up it is over and you have to carry on with your life, get up every morning, go to work and face a world that goes on as if nothing had happened.

From this experience, having had 2 miscarriages in the last year and currently being a very anxious and stressed out 7 and a half weeks pregnant woman, all I can tell you is... try to relax.

Ironic, I know. But whatever is going to happen with your pregnancy is something that is beyond your control or anyone else's, unless you believe in God. Talk to your doctor, your nurse, your midwife. If you are not sure about a symptom, flag it up. If you are unhappy with their explanation, say it. If you have more questions or need further information, ask until you are satisfied. If you are unhappy about the way you have been treated, don't let your concerns go unheard - the PALS (patient advice and liaison services) are there for exactly that reason. And when there is reason to be concerned about a professional's actions or behaviour, action is taken.

If, like me, you are just destroying your nails through nervous biting because you can't stand the anxiety that comes with thinking that it may go wrong again... keep reading the forums. They won't make weeks seem shorter, and they won't make the worry go away. But the sad experiences of others will show you that you are not alone, and the happy endings will reassure you that you must keep hope and, above all, keep trying.
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I too had a miscarriage. After finding out I was 4 weeks pregnant I couldn't have been happier. I woke up on a saturday to spotting. I immediately went to the er where they told me everything was fine and sent me home. Things where not fine as I continued to bleed my husband took me to the er the next day. They finally said they would do an u/s. I didn't know what to look for as I had no idea. I had only been pregnant once before and I have a beautiful 9 year old daughter. So when the doctor came in I never thought I would hear the words he spoke "your baby stopped growing at 8 weeks. I'm very sorry" I couldn't believe it. To this day I don't remember anything else the doctor said. I went home and let my body take over. The very next day my bleeding and pain grew worse. I just sat in the bathroom all day as my husband helped me. I had no idea what to do with the clots as this is my baby how could I flush this. My husband suggested saving the remains and burying them next to my grandfather. We bought a little treasure box and put my treasure next to my grandpa. It's been two years and time heals but not completely. I still cry wondering why me. I'm now 7 weeks pregnant and scared to death. I worry everytime I go to the bathroom if I'm going to see blood. I won't tell my family or my daughter as I'm scared to break their hearts if I have another miscarriage. How do you make the next pregnancy happy when you are always worried about a m/c?
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi ya'll,

I do want to share my experience wt someone. I am about 8wks pregnant. And I have already had a mc 4mnts ago wt 13weeks. My mc was spontaneously and I watched how this baby left my body measuring about 7cm. However now I fear that I am going through a mc again. Sinxe friday I've been bleeding, but the foetus is at the normal size. However they cannot hear a hb yet. This is really hard. The doctor told me that we've comeyh pretty far than other couples do. Because I can get pregnant, but it's very sad the feeling of having something yet not having it at all.
I am very pessimistic at this moment. Don't know what more to do.

Goodluck to all,

Yaël
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Hi everyone im so sorry to hear all these stories i got pregnant after 7 long years of trying everything was fine the weird thing was i didn't have any symptoms apart from being constipated and running to the loo. I got pregnant whilst on clomid 50mg and it was the first the round however when i went for my 12 weeks scan my baby only measured 5mm and was only 6weeks and 2 days no heart beat i broke down as i have been trying for a very very long time i couldn't pass it naturally as it was too long inside me but i chose to have medical management it was awful! didn't work after 2 days baby came out when back for scan and was told the sac has been left inside and quite a significant amount of debris so had to have erpc (d&c). Got my AF bang on 8 weeks later and now trying againn but im worried? as i'm taking clomide i also have underactive thyroid problems and im on levothyroxine 50mg has anybody gone on to have a normal healthy baby would be very comforting to know ^_^  x could any of these tablets been the cause of my mmc?
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Avatar_f_tn
My experience was a horror movie; but in real life. I like u trusted my Dr. Even if he didn't hear baby's heart beat at 7the wks he said everything is ok I asked for an ultrasound he said don't worry u r fine. Went back at 13wks he had trouble finding the heart beat again got an old ultrasound macbine even called another Dr n both agreed it was there I was sent home a week passed when I started spotting went to the ER. Worst news my baby died at 7wks I had no symptoms no cramps I still felt n looked pregnant. Next day went to my OB gave me the option of the pill to aborted woke up at 15 in the morning bleeding uncontrollable cramping n it didnt stop it was so bad that at 10am I passed out ambulance came picked me up. Ended up having a D&C blood transfusion and now i have seizures and depression I spent 3 days i ICU and 4 days in recovery.  Im still not my self I have a nurse coming to my home 3I times a week I can't be left alone Im a mess n I am feel useless. Im with seizures medecine n antidepressants. I want to b my self again but I know can't.
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi Guys,

So sorry to hear of everyone's loss I've just been through a M/C at 9 weeks myself and found this forum very informative and helpful so sorry if this is long but I wanted to share my experience in the hope that I could do the same for someone else.

I found out I was pregnant and all seemed normal. Symptom wise I had sore boobs, I either had aversions for certain foods or was craving for certain foods. I have a child already who is 9 and it's been quite a long wait in having another child.
We decided to try for another child sept 2011 it took a year for us to become pregnant, but we were delighted to find out in sept this year I was finally expecting.
As I remembered things were basically the same with my first pregnancy symptom wise.

It was around 7 weeks I began having odd pains but I read a lot on the internet and put it down to my tendons attached to my womb stretching...I couldn't recall this feeling being as strong the first time i was pregnant but my husband reassured me that every pregnancy is different.

two weeks ago, During week 8 of my pregnancy I noticed that on Tuesday I was not feeling any symptoms at all then all seemed normal the next day. On Thursday I began spotting with a brownish discharge quite a bit similar to the first days of a period. I had no pain at that time.

I went into my hospital and had an internal scan done with a probe because nothing was picked up on the U/S. The doctor found a living embryo and I saw it's little heart beat....I was very happy.....the doctor mentioned that the embryo was small for 9 weeks and that I had the coloured D/C was a worrying sign. However; they were very understanding and supportive I was treated brilliantly. I was informed by some friends that they had similar experiences during their pregnancies but all went on to have healthy babies so my mind was at ease a little.

I went home and the next day there was nothing no symptoms of pregnancy, no pain absolutely nothing but I was still spotting..

Saturday afternoon I had a very dull ache in my lower abdomen which progressed as the days went on into what I could only describe as labour pains.  This pain became so very intense like contractions there was no escaping them this lasted a few hours. I called the hospital and asked what I should do and if I could take pain relief...I asked could I take feminex this is a medicine for period cramps and they told me that it was fine....I took them and the pains were reduced to bad period like pains as opposed to labour pains.
I also asked should I collect the tissue for analysis and they assured me that if I wanted to I could but they would only use it con confirm that I was pregnant and couldn't tell me if there were abnormalities etc.

In the evening then I felt the need to go to the bathroom I went and could feel that I was passing a lot of tissue while sitting there. I went to bed still with the cramps and have awoken with the same thing.

I have read a lot of people wondering how long it takes to miscarry ...for me it has been four days of going through the loss but one day of intense pain. obviously I am still shedding the womb lining so this is like a normal period now don't know how long this will last.

I am feeling a little sad of course for the loss as we were so very happy to learn I was expecting. But we will try again straight away god willing I'll get pregnant again soon enough.....

I hope sharing my story is as helpful to someone as the reading others stories has been to me...I wish you all the best of luck for the future.
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Avatar_f_tn
I just found out today I had miss carriage.I was 13 weeks pregnant.His heart stop beating for no reason.I didn't have any bleading or pain on my stomach.I am cried float it was painfull to hear your baby is dead.But I don't know why his heart stop beating .I have to go to the doctor tomorrow to get a pill to get my baby out.I don't wish this pain to anyone.It hurts when you hear does words.I hope other people have a better luck than I did.
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Avatar_f_tn
I just found out today I had miss carriage.I was 13 weeks pregnant.His heart stop beating for no reason.I didn't have any bleading or pain on my stomach.I am cried float it was painfull to hear your baby is dead.But I don't know why his heart stop beating .I have to go to the doctor tomorrow to get a pill to get my baby out.I don't wish this pain to anyone.It hurts when you hear does words.I hope other people have a better luck than I did.
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Avatar_m_tn
So I went for my weekly scan on Thursday and discovered that I have suffered my 4th miscarriage, my third missed miscarriage in the 12th week of gestation (I had an earlier mc inbetween as well so it makes 4). My consultant was so optimistic about my chances this time and he had me on a cocktail of drugs to help. He is very upset but I still think he is wonderful. I think he is a bit shocked himself as he said everything looked fine last week, baby was measuring right for dates and even did a wee jump for me.
It's off for ERPC no 3 on Tuesday and hopefuly they actually will do a postmortem on my baby this time (they were to do it last time but mixed up my notes). Aside from this, I doubt there are any more tests they can do as I've had all of the recurrent miscarriage tests done the last time and everything came back normal.
Aside from being heartbroken I am feeling quite helpless right now. I keep losing babies on the cusp of the second trimester so obviously one specific thing is going wrong but I don't think the doctors know what it is. I'm now convinced that any new pregnancy from here on is going to end the same way so I can't keep doing this to myself. yet I don't want to stop trying!

No summer baby for me, maybe even no rainbow baby for me either :(
Catherine
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About a week ago, I passes out in the street and knocked myself unconscious, I was supposed to be 11 weeks pregnant and had found the whole experience horrible because I've been terribly sick and lost a stone. I was taken into hospital and was kept in overnight and had a scan the following morning because they thought it might be eptopic. The harsh reality was that the baby's heart beat had stopped 2 weeks earlier. I have never been so devestated and it just wouldn't sink in. Had a d.c yesterday evening as my body won't let go of the baba,. In only 23 and never believed this could happen. The same day I was booked in for my 12 week scan was the same day I had to let go of my baby. I feel robbed and empty but all these stories from all you women suffering the same pain as me has helped emensly. I'm not alone.
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I found out last week that i have had a missed misscariage. After a scan i was told that my baby had failed to develop. I have to wait two weeks before they will scan me again and discuss which way is best to end the pregnancy. I am still having all of my pregnancy symptoms. I wish you luck with your pregnancy this time round..x
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I had this happen at the beginning of October '12 and am now beginning to go through the signs of miscarrying again. I hope all of you are able to heal and grow from these experiences; I know they are traumatic and devastating, but I always think of it this way, at least it happened sooner than later.
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I had my 12 week scan on 5/1/13 and was told it had died around 2 weeks before and there was no baby, just the sack and feeding yolk.
It was really hard to hear even though it wasn't planned, me and my boyfriend had come to terms with it and even bought clothes.
At first we said it obviously wasn't meant to happen and we'll try and go back to normal as soon as we can.
It was the following Friday (6 days later) i got taken into hospital due to the amount of bleeding and the size of clots i was losing. it still didn't seem that real. and i kept trying to fool myself that it didn't feel real in the first place so the miscarriage didn't hit me as hard, truth is it hit me really hard.
It's now the 29/1/13 and i just keep feeling really stressed and annoyed, especially when i see about 25 of my friends with happy healthy newborns and healthy pregnancies, it gets me so upset aswell and i just feel like crying. i tried talking to my dr earlier but he didn't seem to care and as i find it hard to tell people how i feel anyway i just couldn't tell him.
the only person i've really told is my boyfriend, he's been my rock through all of this and i couldn't of done it without him. although i try so hard to tell him how i'm feeling i just can't find the exact words to explain it.
does anyone know how i can start to feel better? i just look around and imagine what it would've been like with my baby but now i'll never know, i just wish i knew what happened and that i could go back in time and change it.
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My ordeal is very similar except the fact that i was 17 weeks without having a early US i had been asking my midwife for one as i was very nervous because this was my first pregnancy im 30yrs old and thought i would just never have kids because i am over weight and just never been so lucky not for any medical reasons so when i got pregnant so quick i was more than excited my life was perfect for once...on tuesday night 19th feb 2013 i started bleeding a little no cramps went to the maturnity unit and the midwife told me to go home and rest it seem like there is probably nothing to worry about and referred me to the gynae clinic the next day i went there and they examined me and told me the womb was still closed but the blood was coming from there they told me not to worry yet but i was already in tears absolutely terrified that i was miscarrying they then tried to find babies heart beat on a doppler no luck but they put this down to me being large in size so they got an old US machine and had a look could not find a heart beat but did not tell me at this time the doctor then said he was going to get a heavier machine i had a normal scan then they decided to do an internal scan i saw my baby on the US for the first time and asked the doctor is that it and he completely ignored me then put the probe away and said to me look im sorry but this little baby has passed away...HORRIFIED!!! no idea what was going to happen next or why this happened to me they proceeded to ask me how far along i thought i was and then i was told it looked like and 8 week old foetus at 17 weeks...i had the D & C on  friday and asked to have my baby ("products of conception" such an ugly term :( its a baby not products)returned to me. i dont have them yet they told me i have to pick them up in 7 days. i have stopped bleeding already only 2 days after surgery but my entired body ached all over as if i had worked out and not stretch from head to toe i still have cramps and my calves are still sore im left wondering what they did to me to make me sore all over?? also im finding it hard to accept this mmc and so is my partner we had a small fight today but i think we have resolved it and im hoping we are both just grieving. still confused as to how my midwife and the high risk team did not pick up that my baby was gone for almost 10 weeks :/ should i be asking questions? when the doctor finished the d an c he said that they took out more than they thought...what does this mean?
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I've had the same thing happened to me 4weeks ago I had a scan on the 29th january 2013 witch was ment to be my 12weeks scan and my baby died at 8weeks but baby was still insde me for 4weeks had a tablet to stop my pregnacy On the same day. Basically it was a missed miscarriage I had come back on the 31st to have the miscarriage but with the virginal tablets to help it to come up but went back for a scan on 14th feburary but some of it was still there so I had a d&c on 15th feburary 2013 but been having unproceted sex loads of times even yesterday and days before that I had sex 3 times in 1 day and everyday
I've been having pains in my lower stomach,backach,feeling sick and tired got no appertite and my belly feels werid and havent had my period yet I have taken a pregnancy test but it was negative these symtoms (symptoms) only came on 5 days ago erm when can i test after having a missed miscarriage??? Someone please help im scared i losted my daughter at 23weeks pregnant in 2011 and miscarriaged at 8weeks pregnant
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Avatar_f_tn
To you all who have had the heartbreaking experience of a missed miscarriage or miscarriage, my heart goes to you.  My partner and I found out I was pregnant the day after my birthday in June 2012. I had bad morning sickness so took this as a good sign that my hormone levels were high and that everything was going well.  I got my appointment through for my 12 week scan and as everybody is, we were so excited that we were going to see our baby for the first time. As the day approached I felt overwhelmed and definitely did not expect to hear that sadly our little baby had passed at 8wks 4days. I will never forgot the look on my partners face as we were told the news, as i had had no signs at all. I was then walked through a waiting room of expectant mothers happily gazing at their scan pictures, which just seemed so cruel.  I was told in aftercare that I would have go home to wait a further two weeks to see if my body would start to miscarry naturally, as the baby hasn't reached the 9wks they couldn't intervene until after the two week waiting point. It was torture, walking around knowing I was still carrying my baby but knowing at any point I would inevitably lose our precious baby. I was 14wks 2days 'pregnant' when it started just 1 day before I was due back to hospital, it was agony. Nothing like the 'bad period' I was told. I had contractions leading up to it and the bleeding was like a murder scene. I passed 3 large tissues the size of my fist.  I didn't seen my little baby pass and i think to be honest I wouldn't have known what to do with myself if I had. Sorry if its too much info but I wish people had prepared me more for what I would actually endure. That's why I wanted to share my story. However though I started to miscarry naturally 2weeks on I was still cramping and passing tissue so returned to hospital(each time was horrific as I was sat with people still carry their babies, which made me breakdown everytime) the nurse said in time it will pass so I left it for another week.  A week on after that I was still bleeding, cramping passing tissue so had another scan. There was a lot of little bits of tissue left which is why it was still going on.  At this point I was offered a d and c (I did feel a bit of resentment as if I'd been given this option when we were first given the news I would have never had to go through all the trauma and pain for  now a month) after the d and c I felt instantly physically better and recovered within a week..it does take you're body a while to get back to normal as I didn't get a period until 3months after the d and c. 7 months on I still find it difficult seeing people with newborns and being pregnant, and now my due date has passed a feel a little more at peace. It's  a rollercoster and with love and support you will get though it.  My partner and I decided to have a year of fun together before we try again. Treat ourselves to nice hols and letting ourselves recover from this sad loss. I know some people want to try again straight away but I feel I need time to let my body and mind come to terms with it all still.  We planted two beautiful memorial roses for our baby so she/he is always there.  Sorry for the long story but I know when I was initially going through it the more stories I read from ladies that had experienced it the more comforted I felt. Take care, look aft yourself and know that you're not alone. X
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I'm pregnant, had what I thought was my period, then started to spot light red and brown (only when wiping). I went to the dr it's too early to see anything; however the dr drew blood to test my HCG levels. I go back in 48 hours to see if they changed by increasing or decreasing. Still not 100% sure if its a vital pregnancy. Won't know anything until Monday, today is Thursday. Although I am no longer spotting, never cramped, and feeling nauseated with tender breasts. Has anyone had this before??  I already have 3 children my oldest 17 and youngest 8. I never ha this with any of them.
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Avatar_f_tn
I had a missed miscarriage in December last year. I also wish I had been prepared for what I experienced. I went through the worst of it on Christmas Eve which only made it more emotional for me. The pain was so horrific I could not sleep for almost 3 days. There was a lot more blood etc than I would have expected and went on for 3 weeks. I was told by the hospital this was 'normal'. I was in agony a lot of the time. I was also dealing with a lot of emotions and a partner who was less than supportive. I cried a lot. I still cry when I think about it. It made me sad that nobody knew what to say or wanted to talk about it, when I needed to talk about it. I know I will struggle on my birthday this year, as that was my due date. I wonder if the emotions and sadness ever go away, as it is effecting my life :(
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Its difficult going thru things like this. I have tried to conceive tons of times over years and even lost my husband because I wasnt able to get pregnant. I never tried any meds to help, just trying naturally. I recently found out that I was finally pregnant! And I was really happy, mostlt in shock and I kinda thought that the home pt i took was defective lol, but after 4 more home pt's and confirmation by the health dept I was def. pregnant! I had to be about 4 weeks based on my last period and i noticed blood when i used the bathroom,  not enough to wear a pad tho. I went into the ER to make sure that everything was ok. I didnt feel any paid with the bleeding but the bleeding got heavier and I had to wear a pad. I was assured by family members and hospital staff that bleeding in early pregnancy is normal and not to stress. They took my blood and my level was 129 and I was referred to the doc office the following monday to do more bloodwrk and they termed me as threatened miscarriage. I went to the doctor office and did bloodwrk on that monday, wed, friday and the nxt monday. My hcg levels were not doubleing like they should have been. Still no pain and by this time my I had stoped bleeding. My hcg level had increased every visit but still nothigh like it should have been and now Im 7 weeks preg with a hcg level lower than 500. It is increasing but slowly,two u/s but saw nothing.. still no pain or bleeding. I still have pregnancy smptoms tho. My doc advised me to come back 2mrw and we would check my results from my bloodwrk today. i cried in the office bc I have wanted a baby for so long, got pregnant finally and now might not be able to carry my child full term. Its hard not to stress and worry when it feels liek your world is crashing. He said that if the numbers didnt increase that he would give me a shot to induce a miscarriage. I pray that my numbers increase! Any advice for me??
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Avatar_n_tn
I just found out today that I had a missed miscarriage and if I don't pass the baby over the next few days dr will do a D&C tuesday. I have still felt very pregnant no bleeding or cramping. I am so devastated right now. This is my first pregnancy at 35 and all I've done is cry today. I don't want to go to work tomorrow but know that I need to do something.  
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Avatar_m_tn
I have the same thing. the dr told me that I miscarried but I still feel the symptoms of being pregnant. my dr also told me that there was no heartbeat when the ultrasound was done, but there was actually a heartbeat and I really don't think that I was mine since the ultrasound was not the one they didn't use the normal one. now I have an appointment next Wednesday... not sure what to expect
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Hi my name is Nicole I found out about 2 weeks ago I'm pregnant. But also found out I'm having a threatened miscarriage. I'm afraid I miscarried but my stomach still seems to be hardening and growing and still having symptoms of being pregnant. Anyone have anything like this that might know what it could be?
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This holiday season my only Christmas wish was to be pregnant. At 9 weeks I began bleeding red only when using the washroom but the colour was enough to frighten me. I called a walk in clinic and they said they were open. When I got there they turned me away because between the time I called and the time I got there (10 min) they had more walk ins and couldn't accommodate me. I called telehealth and after their long series of questions they basically said see our doctor on Monday. I did an ultrasound and found out there was only an empty sac. I waited through more blood tests and another ultrasound and no more bleeding leading me to have hope that the first ultrasound was wrong. Unfortunately it was right but my body was still hanging on to whatever was there. Finally things started to take their course 2 days after my last doctors appointment. It's like my body was waiting for the doctor to confirm everything. I also stopped taking m prenatal vitamins which may have helped.  

I hope everyone that goes through anything like this has a wonderful support team and try to find the positive. Yu know you are able to get pregnant, you can now have a glass of whatever and you have more time to prepare/save up for the inevitable bundle of joy.
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I'm sorry for your loss. I think you would be a great benefit to this forum. Make sure you check out the current feed. I think there are some posters that could use your experience to help them. We would like to see current postings instead of tacking onto old posts. It's easier for everyone to see and follow. Welcome to the group!
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