babys sleeping

i know bed times with babys can be bad.....
my 6 month old son always gets tired around 9 o clock (that time is fine by me) but he really puts up a fight to go to sleep i practically have to bounce around with him some times and its starting to hurt my back as he's gettin really heavy now he's around 20lb, sometimes he goes to sleep in his carseat but i have to swing him round in it... so that just adds to the weight. bed time is becoming a chore and i dont want it to be like that, one night i tried letting him cry it out but hes really strong and he kicks him self up in his cot untill his neck is bent on the top of it so i keep having to go in and put him futher down please tell me if anyone has any tips on getting him to sleep easier as i have to do these things every night and through the day too when he needs a nap and it isnt getting any easier x

[Michele, Katy, TX]

Have you tried a swing or bouncer??  My youngest is almost 14 months old.  She LOVES the movie Baby Mozart.  It is one of the DVDs from the Baby Einstein collection and I highly recommend it.  I discovered it with my last child before this one, and it made bed time much easier.

With my 14 month old, I had to do the carseat thing also.  I would give her a bottle and put her movie on and she would go to sleep.  She now associates that movie with sleep.  She knows when I put it on, it is time for bed or nap.  Believe me, I will do anything for a little sleep.  I'm a mother of 5 and work full time and that alarm clock goes off waaaaaay too quickly in the mornings :)

Also, is your son fine the rest of the time?  Keep in mind that he could also be teething.  My 14 month old has her molars coming in and is fine during the day.  But come night time, she has been a big problem lately and that is what the doctor thinks it is.  Her ears and throat are fine.  So, I have been giving her Motrin before bed.  You might want to try that also.

But I do love my bouncer and swing also.  My youngest is too big for those things now, but your son may do fine in those.

Just some suggestions.....I wish you the best of luck.  I know how difficult this can be!

[nursekim]

Maybe he is getting too overtired and that could be making it hard for him to go to sleep. Maybe try a bit earlier in the evening before he gets over tired.  

[tiredbuthappy]

i agree with nursekim- my daughter goes down easier when i start earlier. i put her in bed when she appears to be wide awake, and it's always much easier than when she's overtired.

at 6 months, dd used to still fall asleep taking a bottle on our bed. Every night, at the same time, we would go into our room, turn the lights out, and lay with her as she took her bedtime bottle. She almost always fell asleep there.
As she got older i got worried that bedtime would be a nightmare once there was no nighttime bottle, so i decided to change the routine. i started by introducing a nighttime cd- every night i put the same lullaby cd on. i rocked her for a few minutes listening to the music to soothe her. i put her into her crib and said nite-nite. obviously she had other plans at first. i think the first few days she was tired, so i was able to get her to sleep by keeping my hand firmly on her back, rubbing it while at the same time preventing her from getting up. remarkably, she didn't cry the first 2 nights as i did this, and it worked well to get her the idea that she was going to bed in the crib. after a few nights i did not do this. of course she would stand up. if she was standing, i sat quietly on the other side of the room, occasionally saying nite-nite. She would occasionally cry out, but never more than 20 seconds. i would interrupt her cry by saying nite-nite. she usually gave one last yell, and throw herself on her bed. if she was sitting, i sat closer. if she layed down right away, i stayed nearby, gently and softly praising her and whispering nite-nite. if she stood up, i moved away. Remarkably, i only had to do this for a few days, and each day it never took more than 30 minutes. since then, all i have to do is put the cd on, rock for about 2 minutes, put her in bed, and leave. she may play or read for a few minutes, but will lay down and fall asleep without problem.

of course this may not work for you. dd is pretty good tempered. but you may want to transition him gradually. before expecting him to fall asleep on his own, make your first goal for him to fall asleep in his bed- even if you have to be there with him. keep your hand on him, sing to him, gently rub his back.

he must be a very big boy! he almost weighs the same as my 12 1/2 month old! you may want to avoid using swings, carseats, etc... simply because he won't fit in them much longer.

[shan161]

yes he is a big boy and growin outta them quickly.... i have 2 swing chairs and he hates them both, he got his first tooth at 17 wks and now hes just got his 4th so i know they also are part of the problem but about the bottle routine etc i will give it a try and see how it goes...i tried letting him cry it out once but i cant do it i feel so guilty and it makes me cry... silly i suppose x
thank you very much for your help ladies its much appreciated x x x

[shan161]

i just want to thank you for your wonderful advice we did night 4 last night of your routine and its working like a dream the first night took about 30 minutes but now he just falls asleep with his bottle, he still wakes in the night so ive still got one more hurdle to overcome but night time is so much easier now your like an angel in discuise so thankyou from the bottom of my heart!!!!!xxxxxxx

[tiredbuthappy]

aww.. i am so happy to hear it! you're taking steps in the right direction, and as he learns to soothe himself to sleep he won't freak when he wakes at night.

i actually got very sad yesterday. i was going to let my daughter play in her room a few minutes before putting her in her crib. she waddled over to her crib and wanted to get in it. i put her in and handed her her book, and gave her a kiss goodnight. she didn't even bat an eye as i walked out of the room. i watched on the monitor- she read for 2 minutes, and then layed down. she doesn't need me at bedtime anymore :( i basically function as a stepstool to get her in to bed. it's a relief and so easy, but also a little sad.
after laying in there for 10 or 15 minutes she always give a very short call to make sure we're still around. i yell back to her from downstairs and she just rolls over and falls asleep.

[meiram]

Your post made me a little sad for you.  I can empathize with you...  We have a good bedtime routine down, and going to bed isn't too bad anymore.  However, she still wakes at night.  Well, last night she didn't, but I did.  I laid in bed waiting for her to wake up and call for me.  It was all I could do not to go in and get her.  

[tiredbuthappy]

isn't it funny- when they're needy and dependent we can't wait to get a new routine down. i never thought i'd miss the bedtime fussiness and drama. don't get me wrong- it's a huge relief and DH and i actually get time together. but it seems weird that she's already so independent in some ways.

[shan161]

well now i need more advice i do apologise because that routine worked for 4 nights and that is it!!!
now i put him in bed with his bottle withthe music stay with him etc, he falls asleep with his bottle and wakes an hour later and screams, did your child ever do this and do you know how i can over come it x i dont really want to let him cry it out as i dont want him to feel unloved or neglected in any way x please help!!