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can i get pregnant if my boyfriend smokes weed?
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can i get pregnant if my boyfriend smokes weed?

OKAY TODAY I TOOK A OVULATION TEST AND IT CAME OUT THAT IM FERTILE I WAS TOLD TO HAVE SEX FOR THREE DAY NOT THE FOURTH THEN THE FIFTH AGAIN? MY BOYFRIEND JUST LIKE 30 MINTUES AGO SMOKED SOME WEED?. NOT ENOUGH TO GET HIGH JUST TO GET HIM RELAXED I GUESS. DOES ANYONE THINK I CAN STILL GET PREGNANT IF WE TRY EVEN IF HE SMOKED?
HE ONLY DOES IT TWICE A WEEK SOMETIMES LONG. AND HE DOESNT DO IT TO GET HIGH ONLY TO RELAX?

WHAT ARE MY CHANCES?
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145992_tn?1341348674
I really don't know the effects of smoking weed on fertility, but I think that you should really consider not having a child with someone who smokes weed.  monkeyfish, you know that I always support you and answer any questions you have but you really need to take a step back and think about this situation.  How would you feel if you and him had a child together and you leave for the store and he's alone with the baby and was high?  Could you ever really trust him?  Would you want your child to be around that?  I think you are beautiful and you have a really great heart.  I don't wan to see you stuck in a bad situation.  You may be the greatest mom but being a good mom means knowing what is good and what isn't good for our children.  You want to shelter your child the best you can from anything that is harmful.  The father being into weed and smoking it even just to relax is not a great situation for this baby to grow up in.  Just please think about things before you try getting pregnant.
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Avatar_f_tn
i dont kno i know people who have gotten pregnant while their partner was smoking weed. i dont agree with drug use and r u sure you want to have a baby with a boy who does drugs? doesnt matter if he does it just to relax or to get high. its still illegal. just a thought

but i dont think it would effect you any
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Avatar_f_tn
i would also think about waiting till your at least an adult
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461994_tn?1206568702
i smell a troll
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145992_tn?1341348674
No she's not a troll...she's been on here for a while.  She has been having problems with her boyfriend smoking weed and not quitting.  She wants to have a baby.  She's a great girl, just very confused right now.
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You are so young, I would think long and hard before wanting to have a child at your age. You have your whole life ahead of you. Listen to some of the moms on this forum. It changes your life forever!
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i HAVE thought it through. and my boyfriend is a wonderful guy. he works hard.he's been there for me and he loves me. WEED IS OUR ONLY PROBLEM. i believe DEEP INSIDE HE CAN MAKE A CHANGE IF HE COULD ONLY GET IT THROUGH HIS HUGE HEAD THAT WEED IS NOT A SOLUTION TO HIS PROBLEM NEVER HAS AND NEVER WILL. he WILL change if we were to have a baby. AND NO IM NOT HAVING A BABY TO SEE IF HE CHANGES. i want a child. and so does he. im ready both phiscally and mentally. i know my child will have a wonderful life. he/she will never leave my side. MARK MY WORD!
IM GONNA HAVE A BABY REGARDLESS, I JUST DONT WANNA HAVE A MISCARRIAGE AGAIN.

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145992_tn?1341348674
I sent you a pm.  I know you are going to do what you want to do and I'm not saying your boyfriend is a bad guy but weed is not something that you are going to want in this baby's life.  How do you know he will stop for the baby?  He won't even stop for you.  What if you and him do eventually break up...he will get visitation rights.  This means that you will be ordered to give your child to him every other weekend or whatever you negotiate.  This child will not be under your supervision anymore.  Doesn't that worry you at all?  
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Avatar_f_tn
you need to think about trying and getting pregnant after he stops smoking. let him show you hes not a boy who makes stupid decisions before you two make a life changing decion together. and clearly you have some growing to do as well. no1 was trying to attack you.

"mark my word!" come on now
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459642_tn?1237588034
OKAY...
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145992_tn?1341348674
Kim wasn't trying to be mean, if anything she understands how difficult it is to have a baby and being so young.  She just had her son 7 weeks ago and the father is a d*ckhead.  Not saying your boyfriend is but she had to grow up very quickly and doesn't want to see you making some mistakes she might have made.  Her son is beautiful and the love of her life and never would change that for anything in the world but she will miss out on so much.  She knows this and has to learn how to accept it.  It can be alot to handle.  

Kim please let me know if I'm wrong here?  I hope I'm not talking out of my a**...lol.
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93532_tn?1349374050
Having a baby will likely not make him change his ways. And having a baby to make him change his ways is not a good idea.

Marijuana can and often does decrease not only the sperm count, but also the motility of what sperm he does have, so it certainly can have an effect. Sort of natures way of trying to prevent drug users from procreating.

Anyway, using marijuana to "relax" is using it to get high. Don't kid yourself or make excuses for him. Nice girl or not, this is an issue that needs to be addressed before you have kids. Get sober, get established,  get married, and then have kids. Much easier that way.
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Avatar_f_tn
aw that was sweet. but my babys father...if you would even call him that is way more than a **** head. and we have court on monday over my son too. what fun! i dont wannt to see him but  guess im going to have to. no your not wrong at all. it is a lot to handle. and im a year older than you. i dont kno why all these teenagers are ttc, there was a post about it on the pregnacy forum and im not the only one. ppl are trying to tell these girls to wait. its like "omg i love my bf, we are soo happy, he loves me, and we want to have a baby, and im totally ready for one"

how about the cost? emotions? yeah you might have a bf who says he loves you and wants a baby but once that baby comes, he might not want to stay. you wont be paying attention to him if at all...like you use to. what about school! college? prom friends? summer?!?!? man i hate looking at my self naked. ew sagy belly still, line up the middle, i have like 3 *****, my boobs are big....but they are not anything anyone would want to look at. how about ppl get married like they use to BEFORE bringing a child into a home. i wanted to be married before i had my son. and instead im not married, nor engaged, and dont even have a bf. not eveyones like that and not all boys (cuz no1 at 17s dating a man) are like my ex but ill be damned if it wouldnt be a strain on your love life
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Kim-I am amazed every day to see how much you have grown. I still laugh to myself about the "what maternity pants will make my booty look good" post from way back and to see how far you have come is awesome. I have to say, I am impressed. And ask anyone, impressing me is tough to do : ) Way to go, girl!
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lol you know those maternity pants never did make my but look good. they made my botty look horrible. and they woudnd up being to tight. total waste of money! thanks. i think i have grown. i remember how upset and tworn up i was about my ex...but now im like eh hes a jerk we dont need him. we're better off! it might have taken me 9 months but im finally there. thanks!

FYI i dont recomend maternity pants.... at least the ones i had. stick with sweats.
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193609_tn?1292183893
Alright, I did not read everything that was said but her is my opinion.....

1st, I have a degree in Criminal Justice and drug users rarely change for kids.

2nd, I had my baby when I was 20 years old, 4 months before my 21st birthday. I am with an amazing man whom I love very much....but kids change things! Once you have went a week without sleeping and you just want to close your eyes and disappear, that person seems a lot different. If anything, he will smoke more to relieve the stress and relax since he can't seem to relax on his own. My son was born with some issues (nothing life threatening that we are aware of but something that requires a lot of therapy)....SO BASICALLY:

I have a college degree that I can't use because my son has therapy 6 times a week!!! He is a constant struggle and working with him has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do. But I get up every morning and do it with a smile because he is amazing. But the point is, It is not always rainbows and butterflies...it is a LOT OF HARD WORK. It is not easy to be a young mom and especially when you are taking the risk of the baby having any problems. At that point, you become a mother, a therapist, an advocate, a driver, a social worker, and anything else you can imagine just to make your child's life a little easier. There are a million things to consider when deciding to have a baby. I did it young and have no regrets, but it has not been easy. The first night home from the hospital, I screamed at Mike telling him I hated him as I sat on the floor crying because I could not get Ashtyn to stop crying. It is PURE H E L L for anyone on those nights but it is especially hard when you are seeing your freedom and childhood slipping away.

Think long and hard....
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Forgot the mention, I can't use my degree because I can't work full time and make the money that I could. I work part time at a Domestic Violence Shelter....21 hrs a weekend!
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Kim-It took until my third until I discovered low rise pants were more my style than maternity pants. I hated the way they fit, the ones with the belly panel irritated me and the other ones just felt funny. Low rise were perfect as my booty kept them up. And I must say it looked pretty dang good. But I would never have told you that back then ; )

You have most certainly grown, be damn proud of that. I am always a supporter of a two parent household, but sometimes stuff happens. You have gained much strength and self-esteem over the last several months and with that, the power to raise a strong little man on your own. He is a lucky boy, indeed.
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461994_tn?1206568702
dont bring a baby into this world with a job, it will not solve your problems, it is not the magic fix that once that baby is born all will be great, no it probably wont, and if you need weed (or he does) to relax then what are you going to do at 3 in the morning with a colicy baby and nothing will calm you down......

if you bring this child into this situation as a solution to your problem, what happens if it doesnt work? what happens if you stop smoking but he does not?  the only person you can change is you i agree work on bettering yourself before you decide to bring life into this world, find some stability, find out who you are, because most can say they are no longer who they were when they were 17, your goals change drastically in these years to come,  be 17 you will never have these years back and i bet you look back in 10 years and wish you would have taken your teen years to the maximum,
have fun , be irresponsible, worry about adult decisions in a few years

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187316_tn?1386360282
Okay girl I know that you are young and set on having a baby but what you need to learn is men and boys NEVER change. My friend who is 24 got pregnant and her husband smoked weed to "chill out" as he put it and promised that when she had her baby he would stop. Believe it or not the day her son was born he left to go get her lunch and came back high and she felt so stupid for believing that he would stop smoking weed. After staying with him for a year she realized that she could not raise her child in that life style where he would go out drinking and was smoking weed and sometimes could even afford to pay the electricity bill. So she left. With no money in her pocket and a piece of sh*t car she drove out of state because she knew that she needed to get that far away just to get away from him so that she wouldn't go back and he kept calling her and saying that he loved their son and that he wanted to be with her and she said stop smoking weed stop drinking and we'll come back. Needless to say a couple months later he got arrested for his 3rd DUI in 4 months and spent 2 months in jail where she served him papers. Now they are divorced she is a single and her ex-husband got back into drugs when he got out and is now back in jail. Do you want that same situation for you child because that is the road you are going down.

My boyfriend was an alcoholic when I got pregnant and I got him to stop drinking and was so proud of myself because that was the only serious problem I had with him. When Aspen was 1 month old he started drinking again. I have to lock him out of his own house at night because he is drunk and would rather hang out with his friends drinking booze then hanging out with our daughter and I. I loved that boy and we've dated since I was 16 years old and I thought that we would spend the rest of our lives together. It doesn't happen. He is 24 years old and you would think that he would of grown up by now but they don't. I'm already making arrangements to leave and get out of this horrible situation.

The three things I've learned in life is this:

Live with something and learn to love it
Live with something and continue to hate it
or leave because changing another person is never an option.

Wake the f*ck up seriously. You are very co-dependant and before you bring a child into this life you need to seriously consider what you are doing to that baby and what kind of situation he/she is going to grow up in. Its now enough to THINK you are ready for a baby you have to BE ready for a baby which you are not.

Also don't give me any bullsh*t about being financially stable in your life at 17 okay. That is the biggest bunch of crock I've ever heard. I'm from Arizona too honey and I know that Florence is the no good part of town where all the (and I'm sorry to say this)  financially INSECURE people live.  
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here here!!!   if they cant stop before why would they stop after??  please i pray you two cant reproduce.  not now .  not with his drug use. would you still want to if he was smoking crack??  yes its a different drug, but a mind altering-illegal-drug.  

alaysha has some great advice. she isnt too much older but she has her sh.it together same as kim.  young girls that plan a baby to love and hold and dream of picture perfect days and nights are in for a big surprise when that baby is crying, wont sleep at night, colic,  teething,  terrible twos,  school with homework, sports and practices that make you give up your time for them, expensive high school and hoping they dont follow in your footsteps, $$$ college, weddings, grandchildren.  im tired just typing about it.  i do have 2 kids, im 36.  im not saying a younger woman cant do it but girl you arent even allowed into a rated r movie are you?

good gravy its going to be another "shut up i have a nice house and everything i need so you dont worry blah blah blah wait the cops are here, oh god they are taking my baby what do i do?"
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403788_tn?1237040812
let me tell you  from exp at 17 i had been with my then bf for 3 years and thought we would be toghether forever *wake up call* things change, and people change as they grow up.  We had went on to be together til i was 21 we were engaged(thank god i never got preg) and one day i realized as i grew up and he grew up we were different people. your so young you have so much living ahead of you.  I am now 24 and happily married(not to my high school sweetheart whom i thought id be with forever back at your age)... when i look back at who i was at 17 i dont know that person.  I dont think anyone on here is trying to be mean and im not trying to be mean, im just saying give yourself alittle more time to find who you truely are before you bring another life into this world.  Wat happened to getting married, you think your ready for a baby but you cant even commit/vow to spending the rest of your life with the potential father? I just dont understand people today... I guess i was just brought up with different values.
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93532_tn?1349374050
No kidding, I am about to turn 30 (where did time go) and I look back and wonder who the heck that girl was 15 years ago. I got pg twice as a teenager, once at 14, once again at 17...by the way, never trust condoms alone! Anyway, I ended up losing those pregnancies and look back now and see that as a blessing. There is no way I would have been able to approach motherhood with either of those men by my side. There is no way I would have been the kind of mother i am today. I have grown, I have gotten an education, my priorities are vastly different, and I am settled in my life. I met my dh at 19, we got married 2 mos before I turned 22, had our 1st when I was 23, our 2nd when I was 25, and our third when I was 28. Gosh, even as I type this it amazes me how quickly my twenties have flown by.

No one is wishing you ill will. On the contrary, the women here are hoping for  a better future than what you are heading for. While many teen moms would tell you they love their baby, I am willing to be many more would have preferred those babies had been born to them when they were in a better place in their life.
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Agree with AndiJ78!
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I am college educated, working towards a masters. I teach. my dh is a pharmacist- a well-paying, respectable job. we are in our late 20's, approaching 30 (eeek!). despite all of this stability, i admit motherhood is very hard. and i have a TON of help from DH. all baby responsibilities are split. he actually does more household work than I do like cooking and cleaning. And it is still hard. don't get me wrong- i love every minute of my life, but i can't imagine being in your position with a child. This little angel is EXPENSIVE. my pregnancy was expensive. the simple house we live in is expensive.

and i really love the way Kim describes life and your body after having a baby. it's so true. by the way kim, i was busy yesterday so i didn't get to respond to your post, but i wanted to let you know i had my paperbag day at the end of last week. this week was better, so keep your head up- it should fade.

andi was right about marijuana affecting sperm counts and motility. Kim and Alaysha provided you with some great, been-there advice. and Mami was right- you want to do everything you can to protect your child from anything that may harm or affect them. I get annoyed when i walk through a parking lot with dd and can smell a cigarette from a distance.

Basically, please take some more time to think about this. you can try to get pregnant any month. but when you do get pregnant, you are making a lifetime committment, both to your baby and to the person you conceive with. because even if you break up, he will still be your child's father.  
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probabl u can get pregnant. But u want to have a healthy baby, so I will sugest wait with having a baby till he stops smokig. ?Just for the baby good. oog luck
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130384_tn?1221596627
"WEED IS OUR ONLY PROBLEM"

You say that like it's not a big deal.  That says a lot about your readiness to be responsible for a baby.
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15480_tn?1302533402
Well said!!!
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428350_tn?1216419581
I think you could learn a lot from what Kim1989 has been through.

Weed is a huge problem with many underlying issues associated with it. Please don't think a baby will be a band-aid and make things all better.
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210400_tn?1325384170
Did you ever stop to think of what problems your child may have from your boyfriend smoking weed?

I had a daughter at 16, with a guy I had known since I was 6 years old. Thought life was going to be grand. Found out later in my pregnancy he had been smoking "weed". My daughter has been behind in school she is in title one for both math and reading. When discussing this with her pediatrician she said they don't know what the effects are on sperm if a man is doing drugs, so yes it could indeed affect a baby. Why take that risk? I wouldn't trade my daughter for the world, she is my life; however had I known he was such a screw up and was never going to change (7 years later he is still a F*** up hasn't even graduated highschool), I probably would have thought of things more clearly. Your young I think you need to live your life get a college education and then consider having a child; they cost a lot of money, and always need your undivided love. Having a child you don't have time for anything else, you can't be selfish; you can't go out and spend money on name brand clothes, you have to buy diapers, formula, pay for clothes for the baby and doctors appointments. Please think this through.
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148691_tn?1260198503
nice relaxation method your guy has.....

hmmm why not try a massage? or maybe put his feet up??

relaxation *without* being a drug addict.... ;)

just a thought.
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148691_tn?1260198503
damn! i just saw you're only 17!!!!

Dear, one thing is to have a little oopsie when you're a teenager and bring a baby to this world when it was out of your plans, and still make it work....
And another one is to be this young... and obsess over something that should be under your EDUCATION's priority....

Are you going to college? will you be?? how in the hell will you manage to do so and work at the same time if you have a baby?

Not to mention, why don't you straighten up your situation with your pot-smoking boyfriend first??

My God! All girls your age should be worried about at your age is what the hell are they gonna study and where to apply to go to college to be a SUCCESSFUL woman in life and be able to provide your future kids with the best that they all deserve??!?!
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148691_tn?1260198503
and yes, I agree with AndiJ, Kim has won many of us' respect. I still remember that post by the way, and now look at you! you are one mature momma!
Now, THAT is the way to go.
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yay i won respect. thanks for the encouragement ladies.

i dont kno why she hasnt come back to this post of hers. she came back to the other one. yeah its tru she asked a qestion....well some people did answer it but they gave their thoughts on the matter as well. There is time to have a baby, i dont think you should rush into it while your young. like i said beforeno1s trying to come off as attacking you but no1 wants to see a baby grow up in that kind of household. i dont think hes going to change. i really dont. he might stop for like a week, but after that he will gradually continue to use it. or or anything behind your back. i kno plenty of teens that say they arnt addicted to weed, but yet they need it all the time and always say their going to quit, and then go right back to the stuff.

you said "MARK MY WORD!
IM GONNA HAVE A BABY REGARDLESS, I JUST DONT WANNA HAVE A MISCARRIAGE AGAIN." ok whatever. but like i said and someone else said you need to think about working on you and your bfs relationship BEFORE getting pregnant and he needs to stop or at least show you before you get pregnant.
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15480_tn?1302533402
This is just crazy! Why?

1. You are 17 !

2. You don't think smoking "weed" is a big problem.

3. You are 17 !

Give me a break!
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15480_tn?1302533402
I have seen it a thousand times. You are looking for love that you aren't getting anywhere else and you think a helpless little baby will provide that. Please use your head.
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Dear Monkeyfish,
I just need to ask you this, are you ready to have a baby if you have to ask a question about weed and getting pregnant?  If I were you I would wait until I found someone that did not use any drugs.  Also, your profile states that you are only 17 years old.  Are you able to take care -of a baby and give it everything that it will need?  My daughter is 16 years old and 10 weeks pregnant, she is not able provide for a child.  She wasn't trying to get pregnant, she was having unprotected sex and the father of the her baby doesn't do any type of drug.  Weed doesn't lessen your chance, it just keeps from facing reality.  If you want to have a baby, please make sure the father of that child will love the both of you unconditionaly and not under the influence of any substance.
Sincerly,
Jessica Walker
Terrell, TX
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Thank you so much for your kind post, I wish some of the others would try that approch in the future.  It was non-threating, heart flet, and wonderful advice.  I thank you
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463595_tn?1334000822
Evean if you decide to have a baby with your boyfriend . You have to be independednt, What if he will leave you with month old baby, because he will be to stress to handle. What u going to do than, how u going to suport your self and a baby.No he smokes it twice a week what if he will start smoking everyday.
If u love him try talking to him and get some help and then start trying for a baby. Baby needs a safe enviroment. My girlfriend was 26 when she got pregnant, but she wasnt grown enough, her boyfriend was irresponsibly, party boy, who likes to smoke a wid once a while on partkiys. She was pregnant with no suport from him, there was no food on the table, b/c he didn't care and she cant work b/c she was taking this pregnancy hard. when the baby born both of them were happy, not for long time., baby cried and that make them mad, he scream in front of the baby start drinking more , one day he even rapted her., the baby was abou 3 weeks so she shouldnt have sex but he was high or drunk alittle and he said that she has to do that. she  kicked him out of the house did police report and 2 days later took him back. The girl is one year old right know and it was took from them and place in other familly, The baby has a shaking baby syndrom (syndrome) and almost day. she was in coma or couple of the day. so.... this is just an example of a couple who wants to have a baby but has weed problem. tak care of the problem before u get  baby, later it might be to late. I know that u love him, tyhen you should help him. u still have a lot of time in your life to have kids. Good luck
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Avatar_f_tn
i think after 4 posts about her pot smokin guy nice is out the window.  she wont wake up either way....
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Avatar_f_tn
thats tru i mean she already said shes going to have her baby either way. so i guess theres not really any point
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146191_tn?1236881412
long gone are my husband's pot-smoking days. he smoked pot while i was pregnant and i gave him the choice - you can have your pot or you can have a family. he chose family. and he made the right choice. do you think your bf would do the same? even if his pot smoking doesnt effect your chances of getting pregnant or your chances of having a healthy baby - it will effect you greatly once the baby is born. once there is a baby, there is no extra $ to be spent on pot and if your bf does spend his extra $ on pot and doesnt put it away for your child's future, then who does that effect? your child. if you leave your child with your boyfriend and he decides he needs to "relax" and something happens to your child, who does that effect? you and your child. once you have a child - it is time to grow up and smoking pot to "relax" is immature. don't have a child with this boy just yet.
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I just don't get posters who come on, knowing they are doing something wrong and seeking validation for their poor decisions.
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Amen Andi !!
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165078_tn?1255610007
Answer to question is simple HOPEFULLY NOT but sadly for the baby probably so.

If you need to smoke to relax what will happen when the baby is born and there is no such word as Relax?  it is simple - he will be gone.  Drug users will always choose the drug first.  I is part of the addiction.  he may love you but you will always be 2nd
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"IT" is part of the addiction.  17 is young but not young enough to be so stupid.
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15480_tn?1302533402
Well said Cantwait!!
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15480_tn?1302533402
Haha, relax-what is that?? :)
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145992_tn?1341348674
Yes, relaxation comes when they are grown and have moved out....lol.
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I got pregnant 2 weeks before my 17th birthday and it ended in a miscarriage, and I was so hurt and upset that I thought another baby would solve the problem and everything would be fine once we got pregnant again.  Well I finally woke up and realized I just need to grieve the loss of my baby and move on as much as I can.  Because a baby at this age is way more than hard.  I have a wedding to plan, a degree to finish, a house to buy, all those fun and wonderful things before we even think about having another baby.  It sounds like you had a miscarriage, could that be why you want another one?  All the ladies on here kept telling me to go see a counsler and I thought it was stupid and you know what... it was the best thing I could have ever done.  I have been able to come to terms with the loss of my child and I now know what is best for me and my fiance right now and we both decided we wont start trying for a baby until we: are married, have a curtian amount in savings, both of our degrees, have a house, and are both ready to settle down.  One day you will get your little angel back, just like we will.  Good Luck!
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Has anyone seen the movie where Robin Williams plays a priest who puts a couple through a "test" before he marries them?  I can't remember the name of it due to sleepless nights, but I loved the idea of giving a couple those dolls which test whether or not you're TRULY ready to become a parent.  Remember the guy was at the mall with the crying baby and he got so frustrated that he started banging the baby's head against the countertop??  Monkeyfish...something to thing about.  There are days when it gets VERY frustrating.  I don't think any teenager is ready emotionally for that.  No matter how mature they say they are.  

Oh, and I, too, remember the post by Kim...She got offended at us that time, I'm sure but now she sees that we meant well.  We still do :)
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First I think you honestly think weed smoking is NOT a big deal.Why else would you come on here asking our advice.For your original ?,NO you can't get pregnant if your boyfriend smokes weed.Why,bc the sperms count decreases.My cousin has a pot head boyfriend & has had 3 m/c.Maybe it was the weed or maybe it was the darn stress,with dealing with an imature d*** head of a boyfriend?You are very young & sorry to say but stupid.You THINK you can change a guy like that?Why even bother.Why even try.I'm not saying you wont make it,maybe you will.But saddly you would probably be alone.Bc a man that smokes weed reaks of selfishness.
I had my son at 17.And with my highschool sweetheart.My pregnancy was not planned BUT welcomed & we made it.But people change.WE dont change people.Sometimes for the best sometimes not.WE (my husband & I) grew up & changed together.Married 13 LOooong yrs..lol.But we had no addictions or dependancies.Raising a child when you are a child yourself is just plain selfish,when planned.Responsability,finances & to add that to the mix a druged out babby daddy?
Please rethink you life & future.Like I said bf,MAYBE you really think this is no biggie.But a little advice from people on the outside,from different places & backgrounds maybe can open your eyes & see clearer.I DONT regret my son,I love him DEARLY.Would LOVE my life the same.The only thing I would change is to have waited a little bit more.
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: ) yeah i know you all ment and still do mean well. : )) i dont remember the name of that either but i kno it had mandi moore in it i think also. and it is hard. sometimes i get soo frustrated with him crying which is not very often but it seems like when he does im about to try and eat for the first time all day, and at the same time the dogs going in trashcans taking out things and tearing them up, and my moms calling to see how everythings going, and all i have to do is pee. it gets stressful and i had to learn to let him cry for a little and for me to learn how to BREATH.
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15480_tn?1302533402
Great advice ladies!!
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142722_tn?1281537216
NO bashing here but with my first my BF smoked and I got pregnant at 17 - not on purpose through but we were careful - i was not thinking
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148691_tn?1260198503
hehehe... many know around here there are the 'nice' girls.... and then us that do NOT sugar coat stupidity....

;)
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159354_tn?1286371288
this is sad...sorry, I'm not one of those who will be nice to be politically correct.

but these kids horrify me today....weed is just weed, no big deal, right?

it's illegal and it's an addictive does that equate a great situation for a newborn baby?

He thinks he has stress now, wait until the baby shows up....it may not be weed anymore that he turns to.

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Avatar_f_tn
this is why im soo angry right now. on the pregnancy like 25 and under or whatever it is, a girl posted about how come ppl are not telling her everyting she wants to hear about wanting a baby at 16. well ppl gave her their thoughts just like ppl have giving you. and well then she goes and calls us "BAD MOTHERS' and that "OUR CHILDREN HAVE MESSED UP LIVES"

its like dont ask for thoughts if you dont want and cant handle them
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210400_tn?1325384170
I agree Kim! People like that give all of the younger mothers out here a bad name in society.
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I completely understand and I was going through it too as most of you know. My husband quit smoking pot when he found out i was pregnant. he hasn't smoked since. he told me he wants to be a good father and not be a hypocit. Cuz I dont think you can tell your kids "dont do drugs" when your doing drugs.
But Landon (my baby boy due in june) was conceived with a man who smoked pot. So yes you can get pregnant. THC does lower the sperm count and could make it harder to get pregnant. If he quits, you will probably get pregnant sooner. But before you get pregnant, start taking prenatal vitamins for atleast a month before. It's better that way.
Good luck sweetie!! I completely understand what you're going through, but fight until you get your way. It's worth every fight.
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that girl is just looking for someone to tell her that its ok. ok to go ahead and try and get pregnant at 16. and since she is not hearing what she wants from us, she is being rude and nasty. a clear sign that she is not ready to have a child as she is still a child herself.
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You're going to do exactly what you want, regardless of what's best for your child.... yep, you're ready to be a GREAT mother.
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This REALLY upsets me.I was a young mother.Not so young anymore..sniff,sniff.I was 17 when I had my 1st.And it was SOooo hard(without adding a stupid Bf to the mix).My hubby was 19.We had it rough but made it.BUT my man was SO responsible.So mature & a great DAD.No drugs,no bad habbits.People who want validation won't get it here.Well at least not from me.Everyone knows I dont sweeten ANYTHING up.And if you think you can change someone,you are as stupid as your pot smoking boyfriend.First take care of yourself & let your boyfriend grow up ,quit his S***,bf you start getting pregnant.
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K1990-I am happy you took the advice to get counseling. I know many felt that advice was unsolicited, but in the end it has helped and that is all that matter. Grief is a tricky thing even as an adult, but even harder when you are young. You sound like you have a good plan in mind, I wish you the very best in following through with your goals.

OP-seems you have gotten plenty of advice. Doubtful you will listen. But you certainly cannot claim no one told you how hard life will be. You have not only heard it from a bunch of old cows, but also from those who have been there and from those who are currently there right now.

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I can't add anything much except to say I hope and pray you do not get pregnant for many more years.  I'm not much of a religious person, but in your case I'll make an exception and include you in my anti conception prayers.  

I've told you before.  Ditch the boyfriend, finish your education and get a job.  Then have a baby when you are in a stable relationship and have grown up a little.  If you can't wait to do that, then you deserve what you end up with.

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i do think weed is a big deal. i just been sitting here trying to accept the fact that if thats who he is then thats who he is. i dont want anyone talking about someone you dont know. im not trying to be rude, but to this day im starting to learn more things about him and i know he is better then that. HE KNOWS HES BETTER THEN THAT. AND BELIEVE ME I HAVE TOLD HIM THERES BETTER AND HEALTHIER WAYS TO RELAXATION. BUBBLE BATH, A WALK, ANYTHING. IS BETTER THEN WEED. SO IT IS A BIG DEAL. IM JUST ALL OUT OF IDEAS/REASON TO GIVE HIM. im not having a kid anymore. I M READY, BUT HE DOESNT WANT TO SO I ACCEPT THAT. THE REASON WHY I SAY IM READY IS BECASUE I DONT SEE MYSELF IN ANY OTHER POSITION. IN 10 YEARS I'LL BE MARRIED AND A MOTHER. I'LL BE A STAY HOME MOM TAKING CARE OF THE KIDS. MAKING SURE EVERYTHING IS READY FOR DADDY BEFORE HE GETS HOME FROM WORK. BUT IF THE KIDS COME NOW OR IN 10 YEARS THATS FINE. NO MORE PLANNING TO HAVE KIDS THEY'LL COME WHEN THEY COME! AND THATS FINE WITH ME. I DONT SEE MYSELF BEHIND A DESK OR DOING SOMETHING I LOVE. I DONT WANT OR LOVE ANYTHING BUT WHATS ON THE TABLE RIGHT NOW. IM GONNA KEEP LIVING DAY BY DAY. AND I BEEN THROUGH WHAT I BEEN THROUGH AND I KNOW WHAT I KNOW. NOTHING I'VE DONE I REGRET. IM THANKFUL FOR WHAT I HAVE AND I HAVE LEARNED FROM MY MISTAKES. I GUESS THIS IS COMING FROM WHAT I BELIEVE AND HOW I WAS RASIED. I RESPECT ALL OF YOUR OPIOIONS AND COMMENTS. HOPFULLY YOU GUYS CAN RESPECT WHAT COMES ALONG IN THE FUTURE CAUSE I DO WHAT I WANT CAUSE SOMETIMES DOING THE RIGHT THING ISNT ALWAYS RIGHT!
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I hope you stick with your words. There is a HUGE difference in kids at 16 or 17 and kids at 26, ten years is massive at this age.

If you want a chance to be a stay at home mom, marrying or having kids with someone who cannot find a better way to cope with stress than seeking relief in a bottle or a joint, is going to make that nearly impossible.

You will find the right person. But that will be greatly reduced if you are already toting around other kids from other daddies.

Focus on school, focus on you. You do not need a boyfriend to make you complete, certainly not right now. Get on a reliable form of birth control AND use condoms. Take some time to be a teenager without worrying about things that will come later in life.

I would have given anything to live a normal childhood and teenage life. Take advantage of that, before you know it you will wonder where the time went.

Good luck to you.
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This whole thing is crazy....when I was 15, I started dating a guy that was 19. He was GREAT to me but had a history of smoking weed and he came from a really bad family. I always told him he was better then that. He finally stopped doing drugs and tried convincing me to have a baby. I want to be a lawyer and have wanted that for years so I told him absoultely not!!!! Well, I went to college and grew up a lot!!! I realized that we were two completely different people and after 5 years, we broke up. It was hard, but in the years between 15 and 20, I learned that you get lost in what you want to see in people. I am now with the man of my dreams and we havea  beautiful 10 month old son. I am going to be 22 this year. Even now, after a college degree, and both of us working good jobs, being a parent is hard.....stick with education and growing up for before you bring a baby into the world. It is even hard for two people who are 100% dedicated!!!

Good Luck.
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Wow! I am exhuasted from cleaning my girl's bedroom...whew! But I dont think smokin pot's gonna make me relax...A Nice bubble bath with a chilled drink...now that's somethin....
I had my first kiddo at 24, had my last at 34.  Even NOW I can see the huge difference between then and now. Now I want to appreciate every little thing more and realize the importance of stability and knowing that my children are happy and well taken care of. If I had a child at 17, it wouldn't be all about the baby.......
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We are all here for you and I have skimmed through parts of the posts so I have not read them ALL... HOWEVER...I am 22, I got pregnant when I had 4 months of college left.. due to pregnancy issues I had to withdraw ONE MONTH before I was to graduate.. MY plan was pregnancy(didnt think it would happen so quick) but actually SCHOOL, JOB PREGNANCY...well it happened right away 2nd cycle after getting off BCP which I was on since I was 13 and I was 20 when I got pregnant. I turned 21 in march and had my son in sept.. I am now 22, my baby boy is almost 7.5 mos old and let me tell you IT IS HARD!!! and I have a VERY good baby...( I probably jinxed myself...) But up to this point he doesnt really cry, he has been sleepuing VERY good...he was sleeping his nights(as far as that goes in the beginning its considered anything more than the typical 3-4 hour feeding span; he was sleeping 6 hours on average at night sometimes 7 sometimes two of 5 znd i would get 5 hours of sleep up 30 mins and back to sleep for 5 hours) and he now sleeps 11 hours a night on average...I too have issues with my bf and if he EVER smoked weed..he smokes cigarettes but 1. he is not allowed around the baby unless he has washed his hands..not to give him kisses etc(as goes for everyone who smokes that comes in contact with my ds) 2. there is no smoking whatsoever around ds

now if he smoked weed(which my bf used to be into alcohol and harsh drugs he has been clean for about 5 years now and does not intend on touching the sh*t...Sure ive experienced with it but this was WAAAAY before i even thought about babies....if his father EVER turned to pot or ANY drug hes out the door...Drugs are drugs.. I dont allow drunk people around my ds and my dad is an alcoholic and when Cameron is around him he does not drink(yes he gets a little cranky) but to him he prooves that his grandson is important and chooses not to drink...I am going down there for 5 days...this upcoming weekend(woohoo bf didnt really make a big deal about it...which was nice because it does hurt me to argue over this...) anywho IF by any chance he drinks i am gone and he knows it.. if by any chance he starts being rude and ignorant to ANYONE..myself or my mom( how he can be...:S my poor poor mom) I am gone...  and ALCOHOL is LEGAL... I dont care what ANYONE says NO drugs should be made legal..

As someone pointed out...you should be considering an education.. at 17 I was trying to make up my mind whether i wanted to go to university or college(since I was lucky to have both options) AND which type of field i wanted to throw myself into.. NOT thinking about babies...there is plenty of time and I love my ds and he was planned and i wouldnt trade him for ANYTHING...BUT and this is a BIG BUT...sometimes I wish I would have waited another year or two...I am doing it on my own because 1. his father doesnt live with me...2. I am doing it on my own as well as managing a home etc...Do you honestly think that lack of sleep as someone pointed out will not want to make him relax even more...this is where the weed comes in...so when your baby is crying nonstop because he or she might have colics for hours and hours...( ive been there-not with my child...but 12 hours straight...my little cousin and i was only 17...i surely wasnt ready.. SURE babies are sooo cute etc and i couldnt wait to have them in a way but i had way more important things... BABIES are expensive and so is weed...babies need ALOT of work...weed comes in...

I dont know if you grasp this but babies many times CHANGE a whole relationship and NOT always for the best... and you need to work on things alot more...its hard.. i know...I have friends in those situations...life is full or stresses and ups and downs...weed does not play a factor in it.. its not meant to.. BESIDES...I don't know how it is there BUT I'm a child and youth worker and I've worked with the childrens aid society here(which is like the child protective services) and DID YOU KNOW....YOUR CHILD CAN BE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU!!!! Yup because your bf is doing drugs...are you planning on raising this baby on your own??? If so sure go for it...its not an easy job...someone could report there is drugs within the home( because if he's doing it to relax and you know about it.. I'm very sure he does it within the home.. where else do you want him to private to RELAX better than home...? so there would be drugs within the home...you would have a choice provided.. you wither leave him or you lose your child and they WILL monitor you.. I've seen it soo many times and yup JUST weed.. but yet weed doesn't really matter it's not a big drug like crack...but the fact of the matter is.. IT'S STILL A DRUG!!!

Good luck with it all.. I personally think if you plan to have a baby with someone who NEEDS weed to relax...you need to think about life and grow up...There are other people out there do not be afraid to look...i know when you get "comfortable in a relationship" i have no issues for pregnancy..well i do but neways with being young and being pregnant but trying to get  pregnant knowing your bf is a drug addict...and dont even defend it.. ask him to stop dfor a month n you'll get him tested.. i bet you he wouldnt.. good luck i hope you do whats right
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wow.... words like that put down the hard work of a stay at home mom.....

One thing is to be a stay at home mom because YOU CAN (and of course your husband/partner) and you ALREADY have a STABLE relationship, and KNOW you will not be left hanging by a drugaddict in the street with 3 children.... and another is to say in different words (but same meaning) that you're too damn lazy to be a hard worker, successful woman behind a desk. I am sorry kid, us women that WORK, that have a successfull career and way more brains than that end up in a MUCH better relationship, household and position in LIFE (generally speaking) than people who  just 'were'nt born to work....'

That is complete BULL$**T!

And yes, you are gonna do whatever the hell you want, yep, it's your life (like I remember saying when i was your age....) the difference is that in MY LIFE i wanted to be someone,..... SOMEONE that would NOT depent on a man forever... because with little luck it might work and i'd be scratching my crotch on my couch... but with sh^^ out of luck?? i'd be dumped by a weed head in the sidewalk with nothing else than a bunch of hungry kids and my pride between my legs... and I hate to say it... but that's where I see you heading down to..... (and i don't even have my magic ball out!)

Dear, more than grow up... i'll suggest... THINK....

THINK....

THINK.

and excercise that brain of yours, believe me, 2008 is way different than 1850... when women had THAT mind set of yours....

tsk tsk tsk......


I agree with Andi, 10 years is enough for you to open those eyes and realize how bad you were screwing up your life.... wanna stick with a pot head? ok!.. do so, but come on! don't bring an innocent life into that misery!!!! for Christ's sake!
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I know firsthand that it was very easy for me to become pregnant, myself AND my partner were smoking marijuana at the time and i am now 12 weeks :)  good luck
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I wish you the best v luck your female its beautiful and natural that you feel the need to nurture esp after having lost one bby b4 I kno how hard that one is and I'm sorry for you loss you will be a great mommy it will happen keep trying ;) the smoking isnot going to lower his sperm count or damage his brain cells at worst he will be tired and lazy and I would just not smoke rite b4 or after if your worried about straining your body you need to be relaxed not tense choking on smoke and try every other day instead v everyday then wait 3 days after your period and agin with the everyother day good luck and RELAX
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i have a child with a guy that smokes weed it doesnt change when you have a child they have to want to stop smoking for them to quit
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Wow reading these posts you'd think weed was the worst drug known to man! I can tell you that smoking marijuana has little to no effect on conceiving. I got pregnant when I was 25, my bf and I both smoked at the time, and honestly had for years. My daughter is 2 1/2, EXTREMELY intelligent, way above normal in every way. Most people that meet her can't believe she's 2 due to her verbal skills. She speaks like a 6 year old. I've known other mothers who smoked marijuana throughout pregnancy (I did not, I quit when I found out I was preggers), and their children are also very healthy, intelligent and happy. When a child born to a parent who smoked has issues, its probably not due to the fact they smoked or their partner did. Its more than likely due to something else, and would have occured regardless of whether or not they smoked weed. I have done extensive research on this topic. Its not going to effect it, and smoking weed is NOT that big of a deal. Go visit northern CA! I know many extremely successful people who smoke! As long as its done in moderation, like at the end of a hard day, everythings done, and its time to just chill and get ready for bed soon..many people have a beer or a glass of wine. Some have a couple puffs of a joint. WHATS THE BIG DEAL!
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Hi my name is e and I smoke weed but me and my wife been trying to have a baby but she wants me to stop I been smokeing bud all my life since ive been 13 and I aint never been able to knock up anybody do you think its the weed?
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Hi my name is e and I smoke weed but me and my wife been trying to have a baby but she wants me to stop I been smoking bud all my life since I was 13 and I aint never been able to knock up anybody do you think its the weed ?
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girl shut up you act like he smokes crack or something. he smokes weed big deal!! and the weed isnt the problem. stick to the question at hand and get out of that ladys business
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yes you can still get pregnant no matter how much your boyfriend smokes my ex smoked alot and still gave me 2 kids.
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Itss just weed calm downn:: atleast he isnt a alcholic && weed is not a drug so her boyfriend isn't doing "drugs".! && why let that be a problem? Its something he likes todo & its him..its like if he likes to play basketball to relax are u gunna tell him to stop? Noo I dnt thinkk so. . && if he gets left wit the baby & is high yea I think u can trust him alot its not like he is doing meth or something & is totally out of it...soo I dnt thinkk u should let weed be a problem at all its him so let him be him that's who yu fell inlove wit right? Dnt try to change someone it never workss.!
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Ok, I know this is an old post but I read it an had to say something....  Monkeyfish, I hope if u left him U DID NOT DO IT BECAUSE OF WHAT THESE PEOPLE TOLD U!  You people obviously have no education on canibas. Miami1323, u should b ashamed of yourself for asking her to leave him over marijuana. Alcohal (alcohol) is completely legal and it is way way worse then marijuana. If u trust your partner not to drink when they are alone with the baby, it's no different with marijuana, only u know if he is mature enough to use it responsibly. Marijuana increases blood flo and with many people, that increased blood flow and oxygen to the brain allows for clearer thought, faster reflexes and just plain smarter. I know lots of people that use it just like your boyfriend, when they aren't high, they are normal one track minded men, capable of thinking about one or two things at a time and that's it. But whe they are high, they think much clearer and are more able to multitask. Canibas is becoming more and more widely spread accepted and legal all over the us. As a matter of fact, most of the rest of the world enjoy it legally already and profit from it greatly. The US is realizing this and slowly movin back into it. Alcohol is mug worse, the leaded cause of "under the I fluence" deaths. Girl, if u love him and u believe he is responsive enough to raise a child with u and not get drunk or use drugs that that keep him from functioning in a proper way to care for your children then u new to do what's best for u. These people on here are acting as if weed is speed, lsd, crack, etc, and it IS NOT EVEN CLOSE! It is a very useful medicine. I can't believe what I see these people wrote to u. I know they do it out of kind heart but honey, it's Un-educated advice and if you did leave him I hope it was on your own terms and nothing to do with the horrible things these people said about him. Marijuana has absolutely nothing to do with ones responsibility to a child. Going out in the garage to do your business, even if it's just cigarettes, would be responsible behavior, smoking indoors and taking the baby's right to choose whether or not to inhale smoke would be the irresponsible behavior, not the actual smoking. I hope u all think about this, do your own REAL research, not off of the first medical site that is anti weed. There have been plenty more pro's found with weed then their has cons. But most people don't do the research to find out....u make your own descisions, u know if he will live and take care of I and your children, noone else, an for goodness sakes, dont think because he smokes some weed he's a big drug head and not worth a relationship....
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Ok, I know this is an old post but I read it an had to say something....  Monkeyfish, I hope if u left him U DID NOT DO IT BECAUSE OF WHAT THESE PEOPLE TOLD U!  You people obviously have no education on canibas. Miami1323, u should b ashamed of yourself for asking her to leave him over marijuana. Alcohal (alcohol) is completely legal and it is way way worse then marijuana. If u trust your partner not to drink when they are alone with the baby, it's no different with marijuana, only u know if he is mature enough to use it responsibly. Marijuana increases blood flo and with many people, that increased blood flow and oxygen to the brain allows for clearer thought, faster reflexes and just plain smarter. I know lots of people that use it just like your boyfriend, when they aren't high, they are normal one track minded men, capable of thinking about one or two things at a time and that's it. But whe they are high, they think much clearer and are more able to multitask. Canibas is becoming more and more widely spread accepted and legal all over the us. As a matter of fact, most of the rest of the world enjoy it legally already and profit from it greatly. The US is realizing this and slowly movin back into it. Alcohol is mug worse, the leaded cause of "under the I fluence" deaths. Girl, if u love him and u believe he is responsive enough to raise a child with u and not get drunk or use drugs that that keep him from functioning in a proper way to care for your children then u new to do what's best for u. These people on here are acting as if weed is speed, lsd, crack, etc, and it IS NOT EVEN CLOSE! It is a very useful medicine. I can't believe what I see these people wrote to u. I know they do it out of kind heart but honey, it's Un-educated advice and if you did leave him I hope it was on your own terms and nothing to do with the horrible things these people said about him. Marijuana has absolutely nothing to do with ones responsibility to a child. Going out in the garage to do your business, even if it's just cigarettes, would be responsible behavior, smoking indoors and taking the baby's right to choose whether or not to inhale smoke would be the irresponsible behavior, not the actual smoking. I hope u all think about this, do your own REAL research, not off of the first medical site that is anti weed. There have been plenty more pro's found with weed then their has cons. But most people don't do the research to find out....u make your own descisions, u know if he will live and take care of I and your children, noone else, an for goodness sakes, dont think because he smokes some weed he's a big drug head and not worth a relationship....
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haha you uptight girls that don't know what you're talking about!  close minded and don't know how to let other people live there life!  And illegal?!  Alcohol was illegal and look how that turned out!  If it were crack, that would be one thing, but it's weed people seriously?  Why don't we just make it illegal to watch television?  Many adults have problems with watching too much of it and probably neglect their children.  If the guy is responsible, a good dad and making money, it sounds like the problem is the girl being uptight and controlling because she doesn't have an open mind.  If my girl told me she needed a glass of wine at the end of every day, I would be fine with that.  If she came home and passed out drunk in front of our child, then we would need to talk.  Get real pretentious hypocrites!!!
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haha you uptight girls that don't know what you're talking about!  close minded and don't know how to let other people live there life!  And illegal?!  Alcohol was illegal and look how that turned out!  If it were crack, that would be one thing, but it's weed people seriously?  Why don't we just make it illegal to watch television?  Many adults have problems with watching too much of it and probably neglect their children.  If the guy is responsible, a good dad and making money, it sounds like the problem is the girl being uptight and controlling because she doesn't have an open mind.  If my girl told me she needed a glass of wine at the end of every day, I would be fine with that.  If she came home and passed out drunk in front of our child, then we would need to talk.  Get real pretentious hypocrites!!!
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I dont know if anyone that wrote on here even takes the time to read these posts still, but like everyone else I have decided to state my opinion. Maybe just for the purpose of me feeling better and letting things out. The only reason that I found this website is because I have spent nearly the last year of my life trying to get pregnant and have been unsuccesful. I wanted to figure out what factors could have been affecting this.

I am 18 years old and will turn 19 in 3 months. I can't even begin to explain the problems i have faced this past year, but I can tell you that one issue was that my boyfriend at the time(who I am obviously not with now) smokes weed. At first this was not a problem, because I too would smoke weed from time to time before we got together. Along with smoking weed I also had a dependency for alcohol. It wasnt until after I met my ex that I began smoking weed almost at a daily basis, because for me, that is what I looked for to relax. Now as I approach the age of 19, I am looking to turn my life around. I have made the choice to stop smoking weed, or using any other type of drug( regardless to if it is legal or not), including prescription drugs, because I know at this point I CAN NOT use any of those things in moderation. Unfortunately for me, it is something that I struggle with. I choose not to be around my ex, even though I still love him with everything I have, because I know that at this point our relationship is unhealthy. He continues to smoke weed, and like others, he feels that it is no big deal.

But it is important to remember that not everyone is the same. Some people can wake up and do whatever drug of choice they prefer and still carry on with their everyday life. Go to school, go to work, do their homework, take care of their kids, etc. But for some, using drugs(yes, i am calling weed a drug, whether you believe it is or not. ) or having dependencies, causes them to have no motivation to work hard for something, to make sure things are right at home, to make sure that their is food on the table or that their loved ones are taken care of. Unfortunately, for some, drugs and dependencies can cause that person to be completely selfish, rude or hurtful, whether that person was kind or not. Even if that person is a mother or a father. Even if that person, has a job or graduated from college. A drug a dependency, those things can alter a person. Whether it causes them to relax or become full of rage and do hurtful things. Bottom line is, EVERYBODY IS DIFFERENT, and know one will know what type of person someone will be on drugs until they are doing them.

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I am not here to judge or to say that anybody is right or wrong. I can only speak from my experiences. I know that I will be faced with comments saying: "I bet at one point in time you smoked, does that make you a bad person?" or "I'm sure that weed relaxed you at some point in time, didn't it?" and the truth is no I don't think it makes me a bad person, and yes at times it did relax me. BUT, from my experiences here is what I have seen.

   A two year old placed into another home because of his mothers use of marijuana. My adopted brother taken from his mom because his mother was smoking marijuana and left the stove on and the house caught on fire. A friend who was high and decided to drive( because yes you FEEL you are capable of being functional when high) and lost his life in a car accident because he was not in the right state of mind. A child who drown in the bath tub because he was left at home with his father who was high( who convinced his gf that he was completely capable of watching his son and would not get high).

I depended on my bf to pay his part of rent because we were living together, and when rent was due, there was no money.(because while I thought he was working, he was getting high) or how about the time when he "borrowed" 100 dollars without telling me so he could support his habit, and the electricity wasnt paid for. Or how about my whole entire past year of my life waisted, because of drugs and dependencies and revolving my life around a boy whos first choice will always be weed, until he is ready to change. These are the reasons why I believe that the use of drugs/dependencies are frowned upon by some. because whether you like it or not or want to face it or not, for alot of people they do affect those who use them and everyone around them badly.

I do not know what or who this women and her bf  turned out to be but my only hope is that everything worked out for her in the best way possible. No one can judge her all they can do is offer advice in the most kind and unhurtful way, because even thoguh we all mean well we still have not been through exactly what she has been through(even though our situations may be very similar).  I hope that she was able to achieve her education, and live live, and experiences fun and new and healthy things. And i do hope that she was able to have her little bundle of joy. But I hope that she was able to do it in the best way possible for her and her baby. And most importantly I hope she was able to find happiness in herself. Not from her bf, or a baby, or anything else around, but truly and purely from within herself. :)
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Avatar_f_tn
Wow. I think everyone on here is pretty judgemental. She didn't ask what you thought of her bf smoking weed. She asked if anyone thought it would affect her chances of getting pregnant. Before I was born both my parents smoked pot & even when I was a kid they smoked some (though I was completely unaware of it at the time.)

I have smoked pot (though I've quit for a few years now) and my husband still smokes occasionally. It is akin to drinking a beer & isnt as if you are doing crack, heroin, etc.

As for my opinion on the matter (though this post is old, in case anyone revisits it). If you and/or your partner smoke pot it will slightly decrease your chances of conception, but won't make it impossible to get pregnant. You'd have to look at the bigger health picture: do either of you smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol, drink coffee, are you eating healthy, are you relaxed or stressed, are you getting enough sleep? All these factors contribute to good fertility, so dont give up hope.
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Avatar_m_tn
Weed is not what y'all think it is. You are all ill-informed. Look up what weed is before making assumptions. Weed has many medicinal purposes. It does nothing bad to your health. Name one thing. I'm a medical student, and I smoke weed. It helps me relax and think harder, and do better in my tests. Weed has cured my insomnia, my lack of appetite, and my neck has stopped hurting from an accident I was in a couple weeks back. It's increased my quality of life. It's a natural substance, and the media has told you that it's bad for you just so that the government can have a reason to keep it illegal due to the fact that they cannot tax it, but people are becoming smarter, and that's why weed is now becoming legal. Now, nobody can say anything because the only bad thing about weed is the fact that it was illegal. Weed will not do anything bad to your health. Please, look it up. Please. I urge y'all to look it up. I feel sorry for the guy who's in the relationship, always getting **** for no reason at all. Let him sit and relax, and smoke his weed. Better than smoking cigarettes, or drinking alcohol. Don't worry, you won't die from weed. Nobody in the world has. Weed's body count is 0. Look stuff up before you bash it. Also, if it were so horrible, why is everyone slowly legalizing it? C'mon.
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Avatar_f_tn
You guys really blew this out of proportion. .you really think the guy would smoke around his baby?or even have his baby while he's high? You need to stop being so judgmental. Weed is not even a MAJOR drug addiction it's actually one of the easiest to stop. And from the sounds of her shes sounds like shes pretty decent & has her head on right. .so maybe her bf is an "okay guy" don't you think? Stop being so quick to judge people.
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Avatar_f_tn
I want to get pregnant nd im 19 nd my man he 35 been trying for a while and nothing maybe its me idk he smokes ciggaretts now due to fact he stress so telll me wat to do
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Avatar_f_tn
Yes, you CAN get pregnant if your bf/gf smokes weed. I know, because I have tried to get pregnant with my bf, and we succeeded. Regardless if the sperm count is low, and you are positive for fertility, you can STILL get pregnant.
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Avatar_f_tn
My fiance smokes weed and he is my little fertile turtle! lol And weed isn't a bad drug (compared to the deaths that are caused by alcohol, herion, and other hard core drugs). So you will be fine. Me and my fiance have sex every day. That is probably why we got pregnant! lol

But don't let these women tell you men don't change or he is a bad person/future father for smoking pot. (Who the **** cares what they think, right?!)  Because they do change. My fiance is living proof. He was a wreck before me. When we started dated he completely changed his life and is the most supportive, loving man I've ever met. Good Luck!
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