frustrated :((

hi ladies. i am so frustrated and confused. :( i was due for af on the 12th and i was 5 days late and happy cuz i thought this was it so i tested and BFN. then this morning was my 9th day being late and guess who showed up..af :( im sooo upset. the 27th is DH's B Day and i wanted so badly for this to be it for his b day. i was so upset and confused when af showed. ive never been this late b4 and dont no why i was so late. i am so frustrated. we have been ttc for almost 3yrs now and still nothing. i cant take it anymore but im running out of ideas. dh doesnt wana do iui again since it failed the 1st time he felt it was all a waste of $ but ivf is to expensive. our insurance wont cover any of it bc where we are they dont do any fertility treatments on our bases. (overseas military) i do plan to make a doc app to see if i have any other optons. i dont want to adpot bc i want the experience of being pg and both me and dh want a baby so badly and i dont no what to do anymore. i always tell myself theres always next month but after 3yrs of saying that to myself i feel next month is gona be the same thing. and of corse everywhere i look there a pregnant woman with at least 1 or 2 other kids already and it makes me just want to cry. im sorry for ranting going on but i really dont have any1 else to talk to about this. no1 else in my family or DH's family has infertility probs and we both have big families. not to metion 1 of my sil is always saying "oh you guys are the last of his bros to have kids" and that makes me feel so bad and she nos it. any suport wood mean a lot to me. thx

[cutiemama]

Have you and dh been through all the fertility testing?

[cutiemama]

Have you and dh been through all the fertility testing? Have you ever conceived or has it been 3 years of just ttc?

[ima1]

I went through three years of ttc, and it hapopened a few times that af was very late and I was sure that I was pg, but nothing.  Then I got pg with dd, and a fwe months after  she was born, when I was nurising and not even thinking about ttc, i got pg with ds. Now Im pg with d?.  Sometimes these things just take some time, but I do suggest you go to the dr. to stay on top if everythign and make sure everyhitng is fine.:)

[Allexa]

well we had his sperm tested and they said he has a low count and some are slow and some dont live long enough to make it where they need to go. so that alone wories me cuz im affraid none of them are getting there. i havent been tested yet but in the morning im goan make an app to be checked out. i no a while back i went to the doc for something and was told my cerviz is pushed over the my left side so they couldnt even see much. the doc that did my iui also said it was all to the left and he had to work a little to get everything to pass this weird curve in there but he did it, even tho it failed. he said it failed cuz not enough swimers survived the wash.

[Allexa]

no i havent concieved at all its just been 3yrs of ttc. ive never experience a bfp :( hopefully i will soon. im just getting a little discouraged since its been so long. ima1 did u ever have infertility problems? if u dont mind me asking.

[cutiemama]

If DH has a low sperm count and your crevix is off to the left, I discuss with your doc what dh can do to try to help with his sperm count. Furthermore, if you're against adoption, you should definitely consider trying to save for another IUI or IVF. IVF sounds like a pretty good option based on the 2 factors you've given us. Good luck and lots of baby dust to you.

[Allexa]

thx for your comments ladies. its nice to have some1 to talk to about all this. ya we are trying to save for iui but i may save a little xtra for ivf instead. we also have to save to go home for christmas so its hard but im definately trying. i plan to talk with my doc about all of this to see what we can do to help with sperm count to. im just so worried about everything. thx again for the support.

[jen_KE]

I'm so sorry to hear how frustrated you are.  I have also been trying for a while with some similar problems that you have.  I haven't given up hope, but it's hard to see a pregnant woman or a baby in a stroller or anything that reminds you that you aren't pregnant.  I feel for you and wish you best of luck.  I'm thinking about you...

[Very Hopeful]

Good luck to all of you wanting baby dust!  I am in that group and I know how frustrating it is.  Keep up your spirits and save for that extra help, whether it be IUI ir IV.  I agree that you should ask about help with his sperm in advance so that when the time comes you can optimize your opportunity.  Also there is ICSI, which we have just been advised to try next time.  This takes one active sperm and injects it into a retrieved egg, as part of an IVF cycle.  We just went through an IVF cycle to have zero eggs fertize.  If we had known this just 24 hours ago, we would have used ICSI this time and I would be writing to you about how many fertilized hopefully!!

[Allexa]

thank you for letting me no im not the only 1. sometimes i see all these pregnant ladies and i feel like im the only 1 going threw all of this. specially when i see bfp lists on here. i am happy for those who get there bfp i just wish i could be 1 of them so much. all i can do is imagine. but its nice nice to no that im not the only 1 in this boat and its nice to no that others really do no how i feel and what im going threw. i guess it makes it easier to go threw all of this when you have some1 to talk to about it all. thx again for all of your posts and support. it really does help and it does bring my spirits up noing that ppl do care. :)

[projectbaby]

Hey girl... I just want you to know that I feel your pain!!!  I am sick and tired of all the comments that people make to me and my DH about kids (and where are they???!!!)  anyway, I would also go for the IVF even though it is quite expensive....is there anything your husband can do to increase his sperm count??? (maybe a dumb question)...and did they find a reason for his low sperm count....  I have also thought about herbal supplements and how we all could maybe use them to help us all who are ttc.... maybe there are some for your DH to increase his count???  just a thought... I am just trying to think of things so you can try everything else b/f you have to save for IVF...because I know how stressful it is when things are expensive and you need money for it NOW!!!  I will keep thinking about it and in the meantime, ggod luck to you and your DH and I am hoping for a BFP soon for you!!!!