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funerals while pregnant
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funerals while pregnant

i was just wondering if anyone opposed of attending funerals while your pregnant. im 22 weeks and a friend of mine said in her background( shes from dominican republic) that woman that are pregnant shouldnt attend funerals. a very close friend of the family, who i refer to as an aunt has passed this week, and the services start today. i plan on going along with my mother and a few others. i have to show my respects to her and her family. i just wanted some feed back from others who may have had a similar situation while pregnant. thanks in advance.
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Avatar_f_tn
wow i just googled it on the net, and a lot of backgrounds(jews, chinese, portuguese,...) have the same belief about pregnant women and funerals. they believe that it'll bring bad luck to the baby. im really confused now. i dont want to offend the family by not going, but i also dont want the fear of wondering about my son on my hands. my family is from Panama, so im going to call my grandmother and have her tell me what to do. but please, any advice is still appreciated. and do you think just parking outside while my family goes in is the same as attending?
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246850_tn?1246163948
pay your respects to your aunt * so sorry to hear * I have never heard such a thing and chances are if you are hearing for the first time being pg than its more than likely not in your country/culture. I attend funerals regularly as i take care of people in their last days. I am sure i was at a few last pg...just hard telling bc its been so long. I will be going to them this time as well.
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198506_tn?1251160515
I can't specifically speak to different cultures beliefs about a pregnant woman attending a funeral but if you are worried that by doing so you will somehow jinx your child's health I will tell you that I attended the funeral of my husband's grandmother when I was 5 months pregnant with my second daughter.  No harm came to her.  If you are worried about offending the family of the deceased maybe you should ask a family member how they would feel.  Best of luck to you.
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164559_tn?1233711618
My beloved Grammie passed away when I was 6.5 months pregnant.  Not only did I attend her funeral, I spoke and sang.  If you are a Christian, you should not be superstitious and there is no such thing as bad-luck.  If you are non Christian I think you should do what is part of your personal belief system.

I personally would not miss a chance to pay my respects and celebrate the life of someone you hold dear.  How could someone who loves you and your baby ever bring you bad luck?

On another note, my ds age 3.5 at the time, put his arms around me when we heard that Grammie had past and told me not to cry that Great-Grammie was in heaven caring for our babies that had died.

And I am sure she is.  It breaks my heart that she never got to hold Nadia, but I take comfort knowing the little ones in heaven are with her.
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121828_tn?1333468091
Not to be rude to other cultures, but, hocus pocus! Go and pay your respects, and celebrate the life that your "aunt" had.
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Avatar_f_tn
My culture strongly opposes attending funerals while being pregnant.  I would still go and pay my respect especially if I felt close to the person.
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Avatar_f_tn
i just phoned my grandmother. she immediately said for me not to attend. her father passed when she was pregnant with my uncle, and she didnt attend her own fathers services. its apparently part of my culture, but just wasnt aware. rather i never asked. it may be a coincindence, but i miscarried in this past May, almost 2 months after attending a friends funeral. my cousin was pregnant while attending my grandfathers funeral, and a little after she lost that pregnancy as well. im going to send flowers, phone her son, and daughter, and explain things to them, and assure them that the rest of my family who can attend will be there. i'll send my regards with them.
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172826_tn?1292440112
mygrandmother passed away just 2 months shy of my baby being born..she was soo looking forward too being a great grandmother...anywho i was stressed beyond belief for basically losing who i always felt was like a second mother to me...i attended the funeral and i was under alot of stress and my baby is fine...everyone has their own beliefs and i dont follow everything by the book with my religious culture if i did i would of had to havebeen married to have my baby...i follow my own beliefs which obviously are shaped by what u are taught...depending on how far along u were before and ur friend when you both lost the babies and what deal of stress or whatnot...you have to take that into consideration...i personally dont think that theman upstairs would purposely take a child away from his mother because she attended a funeral but hey thats just my view...
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Avatar_f_tn
Those miscarriages were just coincidences.
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127124_tn?1326739035
pregnant women attend funerals all the time.  
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286776_tn?1268877932
Yes i dont see why you wouldnt want to attend because your preg...If she was close to you i would go
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Avatar_f_tn
thanks for everyones comments, responses and opinions. it wasnt an option of me not wanting to attend while pregnant. i asked if you nguys ever heard not attending because of being pregnant. i was just being curious. had i not spoken to my grandmother, and her say not to go, i probably wouldve went. i had already made arrangements on who i was driving there and all. i chose not to attend the services, based on my own personal reasons, as well as the beliefs of the elders of my family. its just something that my family has obviously followed for generations, but i just became aware of it. im sure if you googled it you would be surprised with the different amount of backgrounds/nationalities  that say funerals are to be completely avoided. i myself go based on my own judgement, but i wouldnt go against my grandmothers decision. to be honest, the only people who suggested i'd go was those of this forum. which is completely fine, because i did ask for advice. i spoke with her(the deceased) family and explained the situation, and to my surprise that was there belief as well. so maybe me attending would have been offensive to them. my mom, as well as others of my family attended. i got a beautiful flower arrangement delivered on my behalf. i feel i made the best decision for me. and it worked out for the better this way.
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Avatar_f_tn
not in no shape or form would i nor anyone else in my family believe that the man upstairs would take a child away because of attending a funeral. i mentioned the miscarrying as pure coincidence, not as a point that i feel that would happen to me. my grandmother did not say it could cause a m/c. she didnt even get into detail as to why i shouldnt go, she just said not to. and i respect that. apparently she had her reasons. i mean she didnt attend her fathers, and my when my mom was pregnant with me, she didnt attend her grannies funeral neither. no one i think truly follows there cultures by the book. thats just life and decision making.
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Avatar_f_tn
you see i never knew that pregnant woman attend funerals all the time because everyone else i spoke to outside of this forum said they dont allow that. i mean literally everyone. from close friends, to co-workers, even down to the florist, who distinctively said that i shouldnt be attending while pregnant. i came here to hear advice from others all over just to get an idea. and i see theres always going to be pros and cons. i guess its just to each its own.
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184342_tn?1282592350
I attended my fathers funeral when I was about 23 weeks pregnant with my DD...  everything was fine with the pregnancy...  
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286776_tn?1268877932
Yes thats just ppl being superstitious...but atleast you sent flowers which is a nice gesture
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173820_tn?1224939758
I attended two funerals while I was pregnant...now my child has problems, I really dont believe it has anything to do with me paying my respects.  I was in my 30th week of pregnancy at the last one, and the only problem I had was standing and my hormones with all the crying people!!  Pay your respects especially if she is that close to you.  Im sorry for your loss.
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172826_tn?1292440112
yaeveryone has their own ways...it was nice that u had a beautiful arrangement...i had never heard of not attending due to being pregnant..u learn something new every day:) i hope all goes well wit u the baby...
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203342_tn?1328740807
My best friend sang at my grandma's funeral because I asked her to. She was about 5 months pregnant. She had a healthy baby boy who's just seven months older than my third child.

I admire that you are so respectful of your elders in your family. You don't see that a lot anymore. I'm sorry for your loss. My condolences.
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